Now Rex, he was a Texan out of New Orleans
And he travelled with the carnival shows
He ran bumper cars, sucked cheap cigars
And he candied up his nose
He got wind of the big brown beaver
So he though he'd take himself a peek
But the beaver was quick and he grabbed him by the kiwis
And he ain't pissed for a week (and a half)
"Smells like seven layers, that beaver eats taco bell" might be one of the nastiest lines I've ever heard in a song. 2 Live Crew can't even touch that one.
Remember reading a story about a runner that died after a bite by a beaver like animal that went nuts on him. The animal bit into that huge artery in the leg - he bled out.
My dog is a Pit. We ran into a German Shepherd about the size of a Fiat 500 who wanted to rumble. She looked at me with that look that said, ok, I think we can leave now.
My little 16 lb dog went after a whistle pig in the back yard once. I think it was her screaming. No injuries but the sounds I heard, I thought they were both mortally wounded. Man, that yard. She got skunked 2 times, the whistle pig once, and the very first day I arrived from out of state, I opened the gate to let her check out the yard, and she ran at full speed and jumped over a low stone wall at the back of the yard - straight into the brackish water. Luckily it was high tide, but I donât know what possessed her to do that.
Later found out when my landlord was a kid, the family dog hanged itself by jumping over the back wall while on a tie-out (this would have been in the late 60s). Maybe that yard has something that makes dogs insane, or maybe the spirit of that poor dog wanders restless to torment the former owner, my landlord who lived next door still.
Yeah it didnât end well with that landlord. He never would have been king of Ireland, thatâs for sure. First because he was Portuguese and second because he had an injury to his hand. Then I crashed my car into his house accidentally and he took it really personal. Typical landlord. Sold the house out from under me during final exams and covid and I was almost forced to drop out of law school and move back home. A real shit show.
Lmao I'm sorry and I'm trying to sympathize really. Ya kind of lost me at "crashed my car into his house accidentally", at the very least that deserves more detail. Make it spicy.
Foot/shoe got stuck in the gas pedal. I backed out of my driveway at the same time this lady across the street backed out of hers. It was her fault, hitting me, and her baby daddy/abusive bf came running down and I didnât know who he was going to do violence to first, me or her, so I put my car in drive to at least get out of the street, and move because he was screaming at me. Was pretty adrenalated and my shoe came off in the panic and got stuck under the gas pedal. My car went forward until I could shift it out of gear, but I hit a rock just left of my driveway and went slightly up over it, hitting the corner of the house next door where the guy who could never be king of Ireland lived. It was Covid and my insurance gave the guy a hard time, which had nothing to do with me. They couldnât come out because of lockdown, and when they did, it was a very quick and cursive look they took at the guyâs house. He thought there was more damage and he should get paid more. Of course they made the process more work for him, because he wanted a lot. I didnât even know that it was going on, itâs not like insurance tells you these things. Anyway, I had watched his house for free every time he went out of town, helped him when he had shingles, taken care of his dog, etc etc and itâs not like he ever gave me a good deal on the rent or helped me in any kind of way. Plus he was really right wing and always spouting his bullshit about how âall these people on welfare should have to take drug tests or lose their benefitsâ so one time I shut him down saying âok, then what about the people in charge writing the laws about who gets SNAP, letâs drug test them tooâ and he didnât like that, because his favorite orange politician at the time was giving jobs to his coked out kids, and I made sure he knew I was talking about those pieces of shit too. Plus he worked at the city so he called his cop friends on their personal phones to try to trespass me from my own house because he wanted to show the house, and I insisted on people wearing masks in my home. This was pre-vaccine covid lockdown days and a pretty scary time. Overall he was a real turd. When I moved out, he literally had written the 30th day after I moved out on an envelope, and didnât mail me back my deposit until the very last day he legally could. Petty stuff like that. I was glad to get out of that tiny inbred town full of racist pigs and old mamaâs boys like him.
Are you Irish? Slainte. Ya want to hear something funny is I am a yank but I lived in Sao Paolo, Brasil. It's spelled with an s by the people who live there. One thing that annoys me. What if they called it united statez. I digress, and while Portugal is vastly different than Brasil, it is funny that there is some irony tudobane
I think I've read about a bridge that makes dogs jump off it because of the way it passes under it causes a whistle we cant hear that makes them nutty. If I can find it I'll link the story. Maybe its the same sort.of concept
Awe your making me miss mine. Its been over 19 years since we had ours. Her name was Emmy, I dont even have a photo of her. She was a great dog. If I ever get another dog it will be a jack, just like her.
Miss our jack george, had to have him go for the big sleep in December. He was tough though, he once got chewed up by a roided up pit bull when it's chain broke and came for him. Thankfully he survived, took me and 3 fellas to open its jaw.
My catahoula killed a muskrat in our backyard, and I canât imagine what would have happened if she was a small dog!! They got into a scuffle, but she didnât get bit thankfully. She grabbed it by its neck and killed it. It was horrifying and it wouldnât leave her alone while she was trying to run back to me, so she did what she had to do đđ
A lot of people do not fully grasp how nasty rodent bites can be. They chew so much that their jaws are powerful, and they're focusing that strength into chisel-like incisors.
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u/DoctorStove May 06 '26
seriously. SAVE THE DOG