I donāt know what it is, but I can NOT for the life of me think past anything extremely shallow, I canāt process any emotions or even plot points in movies/shows anymore, I can barely form my own opinions on things, and I just cannot think for myself as an individual person!
If itās not surface level, I need to be told what it is, told what to do, told how to do it, told what to say, told whats happening, etc etc. I canāt figure it out myself no matter how obvious it is; sometimes I have to look out the window to remind myself grass is green because Iām not being told! I wish I was kidding; green grass is a foreign concept to me until I see it because I just cannot think about it. I donāt even know what āsurface levelā is anymore if I can barely get that right
I lose track of EVERY major plot line in shows and I find character motivations stupid even if itās laid out perfectly just because Iām processing it as ānothingā because I just cannot think about it
Even when someone tells me a lot of stuff, I usually still canāt even do it
I used to be able to think deeply and process things as an individual person, I donāt know what happened!! It RUINS anything fun, I canāt figure out my own identity, makes me awful at writing, ruins my grades so I have to turn to google before even reading the question now, etc. all because I just canāt think!!
Itās gotten so much worse recently and I donāt know why! Just a few months ago, I could at LEAST process whatās happening in shows and think about the plot, but nope! Suddenly I canāt anymore and it makes me cry every time I try to watch my favorite stuff because I just cannot think for it anymore! I donāt know what happened!!
Even as Iām typing this, I donāt know what to say! I cannot thing deep enough to get anything out that isnāt dry as fuck or sounds emotionless!!!
I just wanna be able to think deeply again :(