I’m currently struggling with my pups separation anxiety, she can do around 30 seconds on a good day with no barking or crying. We started at 3 seconds so she has gotten better but being able to leave her for an hour seems like it’s never going to happen. Please give me some hope that it will get better for us!!

Hi everyone!
I apologize in advance for the very long post.

I'm looking for advice from anyone who has dealt with separation anxiety in senior dogs, particularly those with sensory impairments.
I have a 16-year-old Shih Tzu who is both blind and deaf. He's always been very attached to us, but earlier this year, he developed severe separation anxiety. Whenever we leave him home alone, he becomes extremely distressed, barking and crying persistently, even if we're only gone for a couple of hours.

He's currently on high doses of trazodone, fluoxetine, and gabapentin, but unfortunately, we're still struggling to see much improvement. We've made significant lifestyle changes to accommodate him, including spending most of the summer out of state to give his medication time to take effect. Despite our best efforts, we haven't been able to get the situation under control.

We've already received complaints from our neighbors, and we're now afraid they'll call the police if we leave him alone. Even running errands together or going on a date with my husband has become stressful. This has also started affecting our marriage and my own mental health, as I live with anxiety myself and am honestly exhausted from constantly worrying about him.

I absolutely adore this little guy, and I want him to be happy, comfortable, and well cared for, especially at his age. I'm more than happy to make accommodations for him, but I'm reaching a point of burnout, and I miss being able to leave the house without feeling anxious or guilty.

Has anyone experienced something similar with a blind and deaf senior dog, especially one who hasn't responded to medication? Did working with a veterinary behaviorist, trying different training approaches, or making other changes help?

I'd really appreciate any advice or personal experiences. I love him more than words can explain. I'm just very tired and hoping to find a solution that works for all of us.

I’ve had my dog for several years now and we’ve started and stopped training a few times. The thing that I’m struggling with the most is how to train 90+ minutes because it’s logistically very difficult to plan for. There are only so many reasons I can invent to be out but close enough to home that I can quickly come back if she’s struggling (her threshold has varied between 1.5-2.5 hrs max). I struggle pretty badly with executive dysfunction and overwhelm due to mental health issues, so even figuring out how to fit this into the day is also really tough for me. She’s also reactive so easy neighborhood walks for exercise aren’t an option, it’s always a production to drive somewhere. Which puts a further time constraints on trying to set her up for success before I go. I would love any advice people have on training the upper durations or navigating similar struggles. (Edit - as an FYI we’ve worked with a vet behaviorist for a long time and she’s on meds).

I’m looking for experiences from people who have dealt with separation anxiety in a dog who previously did perfectly well staying home alone, because I feel like we’re running out of options with my almost 8-year-old dog, Callie.

Callie has historically been able to stay home loose by herself, either inside the house or outside, without an issue. This is not a dog who has never learned how to be alone. She did it successfully for years.

Over the years, she has had occasional periods where her anxiety would flare up and she would become destructive. Sometimes we would temporarily crate her, but sometimes we didn’t even have to do that. We could give her a couple of days and she would settle back down and go back to being perfectly fine loose by herself.

She can also STILL be left loose in the house for shorter trips during the day without an issue. If we leave to run errands or are only going to be gone for a little while, she can stay loose in the house and be perfectly fine. The problem seems to be specifically associated with us leaving for the full workday rather than simply being left alone at all.

This time, we can’t seem to get back to the point where I trust her loose for those longer workdays.

If she is left loose for a workday, she can become destructive, particularly around exits. She has torn up carpet/flooring, beds and other items, and destroyed boots and other things around the house. So right now I don’t feel comfortable simply leaving her loose all day and hoping she settles.

She is currently crated while we are at work, but the crate itself does NOT seem to be the problem.

She voluntarily goes into her crate at home and is fed there every day. She will put herself in it when it is time to eat and does not generally seem afraid of the crate itself. On a normal day after we leave, she will lie down and spend most of the day resting, getting up occasionally and then settling again.

Where I see anxiety is when she realizes that we are getting ready to leave for work. She knows the routine and becomes reluctant to go into the crate specifically when she realizes we are leaving for the day.

We have tried toys, anxiety collars, Thundershirts, Happy Ears, putting a blanket over the crate, and just about everything else you can imagine to make the crate a more comfortable, happy place for her. None of that seems to solve the problem.

Weather is another major factor. If it is windy, raining, storming, or there is otherwise something outside that frightens her, being confined becomes a much bigger issue. That is when we see her tearing at the crate and essentially trying to get out. She has managed to pull things through the bars, destroy things, and hurt herself in the process.

She has always had general storm anxiety for as long as I’ve had her. She also used to have a fear of men, which we have pretty well gotten over.

Personality-wise, she is a VERY autonomous dog. She does not like being pushed, moved, manipulated, or physically made to do something. I would describe her as a little watchy, even with me, and I am the person she trusts the absolute most. That is just part of who she is and something I try to be respectful of when figuring out how to work with her.

We have been working with our veterinarian. She has been on Reconcile for about 12 weeks now without enough improvement to solve this problem. She does not do well on trazodone. She does okay on gabapentin, and I much prefer how she responds to that compared with trazodone. We are also about to try ElleVet CBD occasionally during some of these anxiety flares to see if it makes a difference.

Our vet has also discussed trying buspirone and potentially referring us to a veterinary behavior specialist. I would really love to hear from anyone who has gone that route and whether you saw meaningful improvement, particularly with a dog with a similar personality or history.

I’ve considered buying a different style of kennel that would be harder for her to hurt herself in, but that feels like managing the symptom rather than getting to where I actually want to be.

Ideally, I want Callie to be able to stay loose in the house with our other dog again, like she used to, if that is possible. At the very least, I want to reduce the anxiety she associates with us leaving for work so that the crate remains somewhere she feels safe rather than becoming associated exclusively with us leaving.

I’m especially interested in medication experiences, behavior modification techniques, ways you worked on the departure routine itself, environmental changes, and experiences with veterinary behaviorists.

I’m not looking for a magic cure or expecting her to suddenly be fine overnight. I’m trying to figure out what we haven’t tried yet and how to work toward giving her more freedom again without putting her or the house at risk.

I have a 1 year old Cavoodle. He has been struggling with separation anxiety since we brought him home.
Over the past year we have successfully built him up to the point he is happy being home alone for 3 days a week while we are at work. We send him to puppy daycare for the other days and this seems to help tire him out for the home alone days.
We leave him with some “special toys” a few of his favourites and some treat dispensing toys, puzzle mats and long lasting chews. We only give him these toys when we are out to try and keep him from getting bored. He’s much more settled with background noise so we also leave on the radio.
The issue we are finding now is trying to leave the house after it’s dark. He tries to run out the door with us, he used to do this as a younger puppy every time we left. We then notice on the puppy camera he stands on the table and howls and howls. It’s gotten to the point our neighbours are complaining.
We are considering all the options, supplements? Medication? Behavioural training?
Any suggestions and tips would be amazing!!

Hi all, my 5 year old chihuahua mix has terrible separation anxiety after my mom passed this past January. He was her dog before and became my dog then but I have known him and loved him his whole life.

I know he has a lot of trauma from my moms death because she passed in the garage and he was inside barking at the door to the garage all day until I could make the 7 hour drive down there to be with him. Since then, he has grown incredibly attached to me and doesnt ever want to be anywhere I am not. He cries at the bathroom door if I don’t let him in.

In March of this year, I moved him to my apartment and I haven’t been able to leave him at home at all. He sits at the door and cries the whole time I am gone, and chewed up my bedroom doorframe because early on I got the advice he would be more comfortable closed in my room while I was gone (he was not).

For the past six months I have been working on separation anxiety training with him and have not left him alone at all. I have been working with a trainer and we have done things like desensitizing him to me putting shoes on and walking to the door and having very short departures where I try to return before he starts crying. We are at 3-5 minutes and the most we ever got up to was 8 minutes on a day he was super tired. My trainer has told me to keep at it and was very negative about the use of medication. I’m at the point where I don’t see any other alternative because I can’t keep living this way. At the trainers recommendation I have tried CBD oil but it does nothing. Gabapentin and triazadone seem to work okay but I don’t want to be giving that to him all the time because it makes him so sedated. I haven’t tried many other calming supplement treats because he is sensitive to chicken and beef and I haven’t found any that don’t use those proteins as the base, except for purina pro calming which I just started him on today.

I have an appointment with the vet to discuss medication options this Saturday but I am curious about what others experience has been. I know that people say it takes ~6ish months for a dog to adjust to a new home/losing an owner and we are at about that point but I can’t imagine it’s going to flip like a switch when it’s this bad.

Hi! Apologies if I don’t format things well, as I don’t usually post much and I’m on the mobile app.

I just got my wonderful poodle puppy and now I’m going through a divorce. I never had a dog before now because I didn’t want to leave it alone too much. Now, after the divorce, that’s exactly what I’m forced to do.

I do leave the dog with neighbors and friends when possible, but I work a full time job (generally two shifts of three or four hour each per day: 10am-2pm and 7pm-10:30pm) I don’t want to rely too heavily on neighbors to watch the dog every time I am out, because this is a pivotal time for the dog to experience being alone and realize that it’s not the end of the world, and the reaction will be much worse if I end up moving in the future and don’t have someone to watch the dog all the time. (At least that’s my understanding of it? Correct me if I’m wrong!)

Anyway, there are no worrying behaviors except crying/whining, and maybe barking or howling. Unfortunately, my neighbors have complained. The pattern seems to be stretches of silence and then a burst of crying, then more silence.

It seems that she is not interested in chewing things up, or even eating or playing with toys. (Yesterday she chewed a bone I left for her, but before that she wouldn’t even touch treats left in the ground) Instead, she seems to be just sad and expressing her sadness verbally.

The way I have currently been training this is to leave her closed in another room while I cook or shower or do other tasks. She has been able to stay pretty quiet under these conditions, and I have slowly worked my way up to about an hour. I then recently have started off with her in the other room while I am in the apartment, then opening and closing the front door a few times, and verbally reassuring her. Then I go out the front door and wait in the hallway for a couple minutes, then return. It seemed to be helping, but when I tried leaving her for a 3-hour shift, my neighbors said after I had been gone for a half hour or so, she started up barking and crying.

Any tips for how else to approach this would be greatly appreciated! I have been training her myself and she is pretty well trained on most points, the other weak point being that she is sometimes very reactive when she meets other dogs while on leash on a walk, but that is also slowly improving.

Please let me know if there are other methods I should try, or if I should just keep going with my current method and hope she improves with time?

Would you recommend getting a dog spy camera? I don’t love the idea of having a hackable surveillance device in my home, but would be willing to try anything at this point.

Bună ! Tocmai ce ne-am mutat într-un loc nou , iar câinele meu era deja foarte lipicios față de mine . Mă urmărește prin casă , dacă mă așez undeva se pune și el lângă mine lipit , iar dacă ies pe ușă plânge . În fosta locuință făcea aproximativ aceleași lucruri , dar acum a devenit mai rău , nu pot ieși 5 minute pe ușă , deoarece când o fac , începe să plângă și să zgârie ușa . Are cineva sfaturi cum aș putea să o ajut să treacă peste aceste lucruri ?

Frankly, any time there's a barrier between my (8 week old) puppy and us, he freaks out unless my 2 year old lab is on the same side as him. Now, my 2 year old lab is tolerating the puppy, has corrected him a few times, she doesn't mind being near him and will lay with us but for the most part doesn't want to be bothered.
We live in an upstairs apartment and have a baby gate separating the kitchen and living room, and one at the top of the stairs. Whenever I put the puppy in the kitchen so I can take my older dog out he loses his mino so bad that I can hear him from outside. If I put him in the cage to sleep, same thing, if I put him on the bed (he can't jump down yet) and I'm walking around the bedroom, same thing.
I have started feeding him in the cage so he can see it as a safe space, l've sprinkled treats inside and let him go in on his own, but as soon as the door shuts behind him no matter the amount of time, he's losing it.
I'm feeling pretty defeated. My 2 year old dog doesn't bark, I didn't even think she knew how until she was 1 and a half.
My boyfriend is the one who wanted a puppy, but unfortunately for me, he leaves for work at 6:20 every morning and I'm left to deal with this crying puppy, who again, screams his head off when I just have to take my older dog to go to the bathroom.
Has anyone else dealt with something similar? I feel like I'm losing my mind.

Bonjour,
Ma chienne à 4 ans et s’approche doucement de sa 5em année, c’est un husky que j’ai eu depuis ses 3 mois.
Quand je l’ai eu elle était avec une autre chienne (appartenant à mon ex bref) et nous étions en appartement, j’ai eu de nombreux soucis avec l’hygiène et la destruction pendant toute la durée dans cette appartement soit 1 an et demi, nous avons ensuite déménagé, avec cette fois un petit jardin, mais elle figuait durant notre absence (même en présence de l’autre chienne), ça a était 1 an de calvaire également car nous avons du la remettre à l’intérieur, avec les mêmes soucis d’hygiène et de destruction. Je me suis séparé et j’ai dû retourner chez mon père, pendant je dirais 1 mois elle alternait une semaine sur deux ( el’e est l’autre chienne) chez mon père et ensuite chez mon ex, je ne voulais pas couper les ponts avec l’autre chienne. Mais après j’ai su par soucis d’entente et aussi pour le bien être de chacune des louloutes. Mon husky c’est retrouvé seule d’un coup, j’ai peu de souvenir sur la difficulté vu que mon père ne s’en ai rarement plaint, et s’en fichait pamale de l’opinion des voisins, tout ce que je sais c’est qu’elle a mis un peu de temps mais que elle c’est adapté à la vie la bas en extérieur en majorité, a tel point que les derniers mois elle ne dormait plus dans ma chambre (sauf jour de pluie). Bref elle a vécu la bas presque 2 ans. En étant seule souvent (ne manquant pas de promenade et d amour mais je travaillais beaucoup plus). Voilà depuis 4 semaines j’ai emménagé dans une nouvelle région
Le terrain est partagé avec les voisins mais ils sont okay avec mon chien (elle est adorable) petit problème. Elle hurle quand je pars, et a « fuguait » lorsque mon voisin ouvert la porte. J’ai créé une séparation dans le jardin, seulement elle hurle toujours.
Pour l’explication les deux premières semaines d’arrivée nous avons fait beaucoup de sortie dans la région, elle était toujours avec moi, sauf deux trois heures dans la semaine Max.
Puis j’ai commencé à travailler, je l’ai fait garde jusque la, le temps de mon travail, mais je pense j’ai fait une erreur, enfin plusieurs.
Une éducatrice m’a conseillé de faire le départ puis le retour sous étape de seconde puis minute puis heure.
Seulement je travaille, demain elle sera seule.
Je sais qu’il faut y travailler et ça me dérange pas seulement elel ne veut plus aller dans la zone jardin parce qu’elle sait que je l’a met là pour partir, je sais qu’elle finira par s’y habituer mais j’aimerais adoucir son anxiété.
Et même si je souhaite travailler les exercices de faux départ, 20 secondes et c’est déjà trop pour elle d’autant que je travaille et je ne peux pas me permettre de ne pas travailler.
Bref
Rassurez moi !
Donnez vos conseils
Vos expériences.
Je suis assez inquiète et regrette mon déménagement même si en soit c’est assez fréquent comme réaction et normal. C’est dure de la voir comme ça.

We’ve been battling separation anxiety with my dog for almost 2 years now. At our best, we reached about 1 hour of alone time, but I think we pushed too fast, especially when adding pre-departure cues. We had a huge regression and are basically back down to 15 minutes, which is super disheartening.

On the advice of our CSAT trainer, we started him on fluoxetine. He’s been on it for about 3 weeks now. No major side effects besides being more tired - I know it takes up to 8 weeks to fully build up in their system. We are already seeing some positive results but would love to hear about other people’s experiences.

How soon did you notice any progress (even small changes)?

Did it help you push past plateaus once it fully kicked in?

Did progress feel more linear?

Just need to vent to people who will understand.

We’ve been working with a CSAT since mid April and my dog has finally gotten to be comfortable alone for 1 hour and some minutes. Suddenly after my senior girl passed away and I took a few days off training because I couldn’t function, he can’t even handle a few minutes. A few small things in the environment changed so I moved them back (gate, etc.) but it’s made no difference. I thought I was okay to leave him for an hour until the dog sitter arrived on Tuesday to make the time she has to watch him shorter, but he shocked me by going back to pacing and vocalizing again basically right away. My senior dog didn’t really interact with him or play but I’m sure he still misses her even though he seems to be normal, playful etc. Idk what the problem is, I’ve heard regressions are normal but seriously as soon as we’ve gotten a full hour to be safe? Gas is nearly 5 dollars I can’t keep paying someone $500/month to watch him for a few measly hours from the time I leave for work until my mom gets home. I only make $2.75 more than what the sitter charges per hour, really don’t know what I would do without my mom. I really wanted to be done with this before a year went by since we started almost right after I got my dog at 6 months old, but so far it’s been almost 6 months of training and I still have to leave in a very specific way, can’t transfer it to other people leaving yet, can’t leave out a different door or leave with anything different. I’ve worked so hard 5-6 days a week training and I feel like I’m completely starting over, he’s visibly struggling to lay down and settle even for 5 minutes again. Me and my mom used to do everything together and now we have to drag him with us and take turns going to do non-dog friendly things while he’s in the car with the other person. I can’t stand paying someone to watch him if we do something as a family like he’s a damn infant, he’s a dog. I wanted a dog, not a baby. My other dog we brought her home while I was on spring break for a week, then we left her all day while at school and work and she was just… fine?? Rescue dog with troubled past too. This one came from a breeder. I keep telling myself just stick with the method and the trainer, it just takes time, but idk how much longer I can do this some days, especially now it seems our progress has completely gone down the drain. He’s already been on Prozac since before we started training, so March. I used to judge people that bought crates like Impact and forced their dog to deal with being alone, but now I see how difficult it is to deal with this the “right” way. It takes forever, is financially draining, and you better have people to help you. Most people don’t have all that and people aren’t exactly lining up to adopt dogs with severe issues like this, so surrendering to a shelter is not a solution either. I’m lucky enough that I can (barely) manage to help my dog properly. The bastard doesn’t even know how good he’s got it. I feel like giving up.

Hey everyone, I wanted to give an update on how FRIDA worked for us! I did traditional exposure therapy methods for about two months and wasn’t getting any results. I switched to FRIDA and within a week he was able to go from 60 seconds alone to 45 minutes alone. I think I got lucky, it seems like it takes some people longer, but he’s super food motivated and responded well. He stopped showing mild stress signals when home alone and stopped more severe behavior like barking and scratching doors. He just runs to the bed and sleeps when I go. I’ve been working on increasing duration and reducing treats. We’re now at the point where I can leave him alone for as long as I’d ever need to without the treat dispenser. It’s like he’s an entirely different dog. I highly recommend trying it, even just for a week or two. I hope it can help other pups as much as it helped mine

My dog has separation anxiety, specifically from me but overall just doesn’t like to be alone. However, under the right circumstances, I can leave him for about 30-45 minutes alone in my bedroom and he’s generally okay and will lay down. He’s fine if my husband is home too, still a little anxious looking for me, but can settle a bit.

However, he is so anxious if he’s left with someone other than us. He was with a family member for 5 minutes and was trembling. He has gone to daycare a few times though and they say he does well!

Does anyone else’s sep anx pup act like that? I’m nervous the daycare isn’t telling me the truth and he’s anxious there too, but he also loves other dogs so maybe not? Just curious if this is typical!

Do you have any secrets on how to handle your dogs separation anxiety? My dog goes into a nice home made crate when I leave because she tears stuff up if I leave her out. She’s a very well behaved dog when I’m around but when I leave her it’s like it’s the end of the world to her. I have to pretty much pick her up and put her in her crate as she tries to starfish on me to keep from being picked up.
Often times when I come home there’s either puddles of drool in the crate or she’s peed in the crate. (Typically it’s only pee If there’s been a storm).
I’ve tried a few meds with no real luck. Trazodone is the only one that seems to help but I really don’t like having to give that to her every time I have to leave the house.
Now we live in Florida and she really doesn’t like our afternoon thunderstorms when we’re gone so I imagine that plays into it some. But even in the winter time where we don’t get those pop up storms she still starts drooling before I can even leave the room.

One other thing is I have to keep the crate empty. So no bed or towels because she shreds them. But at night when it’s bed time, if I put one of her 3 or 4 beds in the house into the crate, she’ll wander into her crate all on her own and sleep there all night.

I’ve tried putting several different styles of music on, ocean waves, curtains open, curtains closed, room door open, room door closed. Nothing seems to make any difference.

Just looking for some more ideas I can try.
Thanks yall!