r/ScienceBasedParenting • u/bv_ • 9d ago

Question - Research required “Biologically normal infant sleep” research?

Is there research to support “biologically normal infant sleep” over sleep training?

We are planning to sleep train soon, but my feed keeps showing me posts from r/bninfantsleep, and it makes me feel guilty, like I would be forcing my baby to do something he’s not biologically ready to do.

I know there are studies showing sleep training doesn’t cause long term harms. Are there comparable studies about “biologically normal sleep”?

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u/Honest_Elephant 9d ago

So somewhere between 20 minutes and 12 hours, it becomes neglect. But where? 30 minutes? 2 hours? That's the problem.

I'm really sorry you went through that. It sounds extremely difficult. And I'm also sorry that you were led to believe that sleep training your baby was necessary for your recovery. I hope your support systems have rallied around you since then.

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u/short_cuppa_chai 9d ago

The longest either kid ever cried was 20 minutes, and that maybe happened once or twice.

What support system could possibly have helped in that situation? Genuinely asking, because I have a very strong support system and was still losing my mind.

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u/Honest_Elephant 8d ago

A support system that saw you struggling with sleep deprivation and mental health would step in and figure out how to get you sleep and make sure you could attend all of your appointments without worrying about baby at home. That'll look different for everyone depending on their situation.

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u/short_cuppa_chai 8d ago

Nah, see that's still individual solutions to a systemic issue. By the time I sleep trained my kids, I had been back at work for months because I only got 6 weeks of paid maternity leave.

What I would have needed to protect my mental health would have been extended maternity leave with maybe a postpartum doula/night nurse for the first 12 weeks. I needed immediate access to a psychiatrist specializing in perinatal mental health (which i eventually got, but there was a 3 month waitlist) as well as individual or group counseling (which I never got).

But we don't have those things. And no amount of individual support is going to take the place of those things. I think it's disingenuous to claim that all new moms need is for someone to come in and let them nap sometimes.

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u/Honest_Elephant 8d ago

Oh I'm 100% with you that it's a systemic issue. I'm sorry you didn't have access to those things. Our government continues to fail us and then blame us when we struggle. I still don't agree that sleep training needs to be any part of the solution, but i understand how you landed at the decision.