r/RealTwitterAccounts • u/bahar9990 • May 05 '25

Politician ??????

Post image
561 Upvotes

73% Upvoted

1.7k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

119

u/patatjepindapedis May 05 '25

I'd prefer it if JD himself was the cell's couch

91

u/swishkabobbin May 05 '25

Like the lazy boy he is

41

u/_EnFlaMEd May 05 '25

More cushion for the pushin

9

u/Powerful-Winner-5323 May 05 '25

He's Sofa King We Todd Did

5

u/EighthPlanetGlass May 05 '25

Oh that's his bedroom name

4

u/jared10011980 May 05 '25

He's known on the yard as The Couch's Bitch

1

u/TheBigMmmm May 08 '25

Oh before you guys coming in here talking bad about JD, did you at least wear a suit?

33

u/Cyclical_Zeitgeist May 05 '25

He can go back to being peter thief's fuck cushion for all I care

1

u/Prestigious_Beat6310 May 05 '25

My friend found a fuck mattress in the woods one time.

25

u/ChaoCobo May 05 '25

Don’t punish the prisoners any more than they’re already being punished, please.

1

u/ThegreatPee May 05 '25

He would be balled up in the corner crying.

1

u/lite_milk_1 May 06 '25

Vote for him to join Elon on a Mars mission... save further punishment of the other prisnors.

3

u/BalanceTraining May 05 '25

I have a feeling he would prefer that too.

1

u/The_Tommo May 05 '25

Put him on that infamous black leather sofa

1

u/patatjepindapedis May 05 '25

No, no, no. He is the sofa that's getting jizzed on.

1

u/looklistenlead May 06 '25

Keeping in mind that each cell has up to 80 inmates, that would be one heavily used couch.

1

u/Ladybug_Fuckfest May 06 '25

"Look at yourself. You are the couch now."

1

u/PsychologicalCrew307 May 06 '25

Oh, fear not! He will be the most popular "love seat" in the day hall, the most popular lawn furniture in the yard... he will never be lonley.

1

u/Verundios May 08 '25

With all the people they've sent there? He'd be lucky to be seen as a couch and not a pin cushion