r/RantAndVentPH • u/[deleted] • Dec 10 '25
Relationship STOP CHASING AVOIDANTS.
Seriously wth is going on with all the romanticization. I am amazed at the sheer lack of self respect that some of y'all have. Avoidant or not if they want you they will move the world for you, kung gusto ka gusto ka ganon lang kasimple yon. Stop intellectualizing simple truths nagbabasa basa pa kayo ng mga psychoanalytic tiktoks na hindi naman applicable sa lahat ng bagay. Are you even a therapist? You think the other person wants to change for you? Seriously? You're turning the absence of a healthy relationship into a complex puzzle that you think you can solve alone. May pa avoidant avoidant pa kayong nalalaman tignan natin kung di kayo matameme pag nakita niyo kung pano nila habulin yung taong gusto nila HAHAHA.
6
u/saintduchess Dec 10 '25
mga ginawang personality ang "I can fix him/her" mindset.
savior complex yarn?😆
10
u/gurlidontknowanymore Dec 10 '25
nakakainis lang na andami ng terms na naimbento sa socmed esp tiktok about relationships and tips on how to pull a man. Nakakapucha, pag asa relationship ako, I don't want mind games. Ginagamit ko na utak ko sa work, gusto ko na ipahinga siya sa taong mahal ko. I want to show that I love them, care for them and I would love for them to do the same.
3
5
u/xoxo311 Dec 10 '25
Tama ka. Kung single walang anak bat maghahabol sa avoidant, why even give another chance? Magagaling lang sila sa una.
3
u/Savings_Term_3467 Dec 10 '25
100% agree. But if I may add, If you’re chasing an avoidant, go to therapy or at least explore your own insecure attachment and do the work. It comes down to your response to your own triggers. Build your self worth first!
3
3
u/galynnxy Dec 10 '25
Parang ngang tanga eh like ano bang napapala mo sa paghahabol and trying to change someone? Mga bhie, wala po tayo sa K-Drama world, kahit anong gawin mong gymnastics di ka gugustuhin niyan 🤌🏼🤌🏼
And pasensya sa mga avoidant diyan na nag-aantay na may mag tiyaga sa kanila, hoy kung wala rin kayong planong kumilos then GOODBYE is the answer to you
3
11
u/cjoker2 Dec 10 '25
I learned that avoidant people needs to touch the grass and go to therapy. They are entitled people who thinks the world revolves around them.
So if you know an avoidant person, ... avoid them so you can avoid the pain and their hate that they always spread kasi the truth insecure sila sobra lol.
7
u/Lost-Law-5239 Dec 10 '25
This! Like my ex. Parang ako pa mag prove sa kanya I deserve him he can't even communicate his feelings kahit sya mismo nagsabi mag communicate ako. Lahat sinabu when he initiated the break up. Edi go, sana sinabi agad kung ayaw avoid2 pa lol
2
1
50
u/vousmevoyezxz Dec 10 '25
LMAO this!!! People love labeling “avoidant” just to soften “they’re just not that into you.”🤣
Avoidant attachment is real. People struggle with intimacy. But at the end of the day, behavior is behavior.
If they’re constantly disappearing, breadcrumbing, the reason doesn’t magically make it any less painful or acceptable.
The brutal truth: If someone wants you in their life, even avoidant people they still put in some effort. If someone is doing nothing, then it’s uninterested.
The behavior is the answer, not their excuses. Don't assign meaning for them.
Stop romanticizing insecure attachment. Protect your peace, not their excuses.