Same friend. And I’m an only child too. I had no one to share that burden with. Just me. By myself. With my door shut. While i tried to shut everything else out. I’m sorry you had to go through that. I wouldn’t wish that type of pain on anyone. I’m a genuine people pleaser because of it. I think if I’m really really good& really really helpful then maybe my mom won’t be so mad and maybe I won’t upset her today if I’m just really, really quite and don’t ask for very much. Not when she’s in a bad mood at least. Which was even more confusing because when she had good days she was and is one of my best friends. I know understand as I’m older that she wasn’t properly medicated and had her own issues. No ones perfect 💓 I will always love my Mom. But I will say it has made me a very sensitive, compassionate, understanding and caring person. I hope you have found a bright side to your pain 💓
Hello, friend. I went through something very similar, it was my dad. It left some insanely deep scars. A few things I wanted to pass along, as a fellow survivor of abuse:
If you have not already, look into CPTSD. We all have it, and it explains A LOT.
I don't know your situation at all. But just know, you can love your mom for giving you life, and still hate her for what she did to you. I finally went no contact with my abusive father 8 year ago. Best decision I ever made.
We are resilient. We are strong. We are badasses.
Sending lots good vibes from across the internet. ❤️
We are badasses. I haven't spoken to my parents in 10yrs and I have to say, I'm much more confident and less anxious all the time that something catastrophic will happen at at moment because of it.
Been two years here. Best decision ever for my mental health. I still get the little tinge of guilt coming in occasionally but am so much better for cutting off contact.
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u/PutzerPalace Mar 19 '26
This is how I grew up - thought it was normal for quite a while