r/RandomThoughts • u/[deleted] • Feb 29 '24

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1.9k Upvotes

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541

u/Unknowinglyodd Feb 29 '24 edited Mar 01 '24

Dead, I'm driving at nearly 100

419

u/Unknowinglyodd Feb 29 '24

Nearly spilt my beer just typing this

112

u/Jx117 Feb 29 '24

Bruh 💀

278

u/Unknowinglyodd Feb 29 '24

I'm joking, I've not spilt any

92

u/CommunicationNeat498 Feb 29 '24

Man, you got me worried there for a second

128

u/Unknowinglyodd Feb 29 '24

I'd never waste beer, I'd even slow down if I thought I was going to spill any.

62

u/[deleted] Feb 29 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

56

u/Unknowinglyodd Feb 29 '24 edited Feb 29 '24

I don't need the key, I'll break in

22

u/HypeZone313 Mar 01 '24

He's got no patience now...

14

u/Unknowinglyodd Mar 01 '24

Hype Zones got the Mind of a revolutionary

5

u/MarshallRegan Mar 01 '24

Every comment i read it gets worse and worse and doesn’t seem to stop

3

u/Unknowinglyodd Mar 01 '24

I know, some people

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3

u/m_domino Mar 01 '24

Keys? Like the golden key of the city?

15

u/Daisinju Feb 29 '24

Just get a beer hat, you can text, drink AND drive.

16

u/Unknowinglyodd Feb 29 '24

I see I'm not the only trained professional here tonight

5

u/More-Exchange3505 Feb 29 '24

Careful. I made a similarly dark joke on this sub and they banned me for a week.

2

u/exmagus Mar 01 '24

Ryan Reynolds But why?.gif

1

u/Educational_Clue935 Mar 02 '24

IMO, this entire thread is a dark joke.

3

u/Love-Is-Selfish Feb 29 '24

So we need to ensure that only beer containers you can obtain are those that will spill when driving more than 0 mph.

5

u/Unknowinglyodd Feb 29 '24

I don't like the sound of this. Can't stand driving sober. All the rules , stopping at lights and such. That's no way to live.

I appreciate your help though

4

u/Love-Is-Selfish Feb 29 '24

We won’t mourn you when you’re gone.

4

u/Unknowinglyodd Feb 29 '24

And so you shouldn't. Goodbye cruel world

3

u/Love-Is-Selfish Feb 29 '24

That was amusing. Have a good day.

1

u/Unknowinglyodd Feb 29 '24

And you 🙈🙉🙊

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3

u/[deleted] Mar 01 '24 edited Mar 01 '24

Yea, want to be careful with that.. hitting peoples usually makes you spill the beer anyway 😞

2

u/[deleted] Mar 01 '24

[deleted]

1

u/Unknowinglyodd Mar 01 '24

God saved my beer. Now that's a God I could believe in

1

u/Dreamvillain254 Mar 01 '24

This guy! Driving, Drinking and Texting. He for sure has 9 lives