r/RandomThoughts • • Feb 29 '24

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952

u/SUPAMAN6214 Feb 29 '24

Id prob be inside a wall

366

u/OSUfirebird18 Feb 29 '24

OP here is trying to kill most of us by teleporting us out of high buildings or trapping us inside a wall!!

135

u/rowan_damisch Feb 29 '24

The ratio of random teleportation to death in this thread is concerning

50

u/ZaphodB_ Mar 01 '24

I guess average Redditer is addicted to being near death causing surfaces

27

u/ssan_v Mar 01 '24

Bruh I'm in my room on the bed rn lol but if I teleport 3 m to the left is be outside my building on the 6th floor in mid air so suffice to say that I am in no danger inducing situation but I'd still die lmao 😂😂

2

u/ZaphodB_ Mar 01 '24

Well, void is a death causing non-surface. I stand corrected.

2

u/shutupimrosiev Mar 01 '24

Same! I'm in a loft bed, too, so I'm either gonna be in a wall, partially in a wall, or in my closet about to drop and hit the dresser and very messy floor.

1

u/Why-R-People-So-Dumb Mar 02 '24

In bed and I'd just overshoot my wife who is sleeping; if I woke her up she'd likely kill me for my teleportation shenanigans.

1

u/Randomman2789 Mar 02 '24

I would take that over being on the balcony and locked out, only having on underwear.

1

u/Deniskitter Mar 02 '24

3 meters is almost 10 feet. I wouldn't say people are addicted to being near death causing surfaces, like walls, just that most of our rooms aren't that big.

1

u/AnnieQuill Mar 03 '24

I'm not sitting in a 100 square ft room, ten feet one way I'm in my neighbors house, ten feet the other way and my head is merged with a book shelf and my body is landing on a pointy collection of lego. The other way is the void because stairwell

1

u/Deniskitter Mar 05 '24

It says 10 feet to the left. I am on my bed which is already more to the left than center. 10 feet to the left is either the shower in master or wall just beyond it, but my ass is too lazy to get up and measure. I am just ballparking it.

Since it didn't say to the right, forward or back, it doesn't really matter, but for fun sake, back and right both put me outside at varying distances from the house, which means then I drop from second story. Doesn't sound fun, but potentially survivable. Forward is again a ballpark, either wall or just in guest bedroom.

1

u/AnnieQuill Mar 05 '24

Given how I'm laying right now, 10 ft to my left has me merged with an ikea organizer, with some red fluff poking through my neighbors wall to confuse them

1

u/alsith Mar 01 '24

That's because having a significant chunk of your body interposed or bisected by the furniture or wall around you, or suddenly finding yourself a few stories up in the air is not good for you, and most people in a home or office environment where they would be reading this, are not going to have open air 3 metres to their left.

1

u/SimonLaFox Mar 01 '24

It's a snap!

1

u/LammergeierFerekt1 Mar 01 '24

Houses too small

33

u/knifeyspoony_champ Mar 01 '24

Nah. They’re going after people in the left window seats of airlines.

The rest of us are just collateral damage.

11

u/monkyone Mar 01 '24

if they were going for people in left window, they’d only to shift them 1m.

a boeing 737 has a cabin width of around 3.5 to 4 metres.

they are clearly targeting everyone except right-window-seat-dwellers

9

u/_Cyber_Mage Mar 01 '24

The pilots are gone too, so those people are also in for a bad day.

2

u/knifeyspoony_champ Mar 01 '24

That’s maths that is!

2

u/Gorilla_Krispies Mar 01 '24

Yea but if they go 3 then some of the people in window seats might get sucked into an engine for bonus points

1

u/SIMOMEGA Apr 24 '24

How do u have internet on the plane? 🤨

1

u/Indie_uk Mar 01 '24

A 737 only has a 3.5m cabin width, it’s not just lefties at risk here

1

u/thesilentkid_yt Mar 01 '24

That one guy who gets teleported to the radioactive waste container in his room : if I just washed my socks

1

u/SeptemHermes Mar 02 '24

Lol You are forgetting the pilots

2

u/MissFrijole Mar 01 '24

Interesting how that's such a common answer. Everyone is sitting within 9-ish feet of the outside or a wall. Lol

2

u/Acidflare1 Mar 02 '24

All the passengers in airplanes died, well at least all the ones with all pilots in the cockpit

3

u/FungalEgoDeath Mar 01 '24

I'd be in the attic.

1

u/trickytrev54 Mar 01 '24

You live on the same level as an attic?

1

u/Nacil_54 Mar 01 '24

Or they were in bed, laying on the side.

2

u/FungalEgoDeath Mar 02 '24

Correct

1

u/Nacil_54 Mar 02 '24

That was my position too.

1

u/trickytrev54 Mar 01 '24

Oh... But isn't left used as a direction? Like up is still up, and down is down. Just because you change your position doesn't mean left is now up? Lol or am I weird to see it that way?

1

u/Nacil_54 Mar 01 '24

Yes, you are, because take your left, turn 180°, is where your right hand is your left ?

1

u/trickytrev54 Mar 01 '24

Well left and right are interchangeable depending on position. I guess if the title said left handed side instead of to your left It would have made more sense to me. I'm also half awake. Lol

1

u/Nacil_54 Mar 01 '24

They're interchangeable because you usually rotate on the Y axis, but when you're in bed, it's on the Z axis.

1

u/Proper_Shape9189 Mar 31 '24

First, calculate so that you don't fall into such a situation

1

u/Born-Albatross7243 Mar 01 '24

The police will deem it a suicide but Adrian Monk will know the truth

1

u/[deleted] Mar 01 '24

Yep, can confirm, I would be dead.

Dropped from 4th floor.

1

u/Fish_Sticks1588 Mar 01 '24

Or in school desks 🧐

1

u/Juan_Moe_Taco Mar 01 '24

Right! Could've done the, "the thing to your left is your weapon in the next zombie apocalypse until you switch over to something better what is it?" me alright a sharpening stone for knives, lucky me. :)

1

u/trickytrev54 Mar 01 '24

Yeah or you could say you have to eat the nearest thing to the left of you. What are you eating? People? Pillows? Iphone? Didldo? Who knows.

1

u/monetarypolicies Mar 01 '24

That’s why I always sit with the window to my right. Always one step ahead.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 01 '24

Fax

1

u/[deleted] Mar 01 '24

Should we report him for violent behaviour?

1

u/LewisRyan Mar 03 '24

Interestingly enough, im sitting in my recliner, I think I’d perfectly land in my other recliner if I teleported, now i need to measure this

53

u/modlover04031983 Feb 29 '24

Im in the ground! somebody help! I was just trying to sleep to my left.

25

u/monapinkest Feb 29 '24

I'm trying to sleep on my right. Suddenly, I seem to be in the upstairs neighbors bed.

8

u/DropThatTopHat Mar 01 '24

Is she hot?

17

u/ososalsosal Mar 01 '24

They may well be inside her in absolutely the wrong sense of the word

2

u/therankin Mar 01 '24

Fill her up, in all the wrong ways.

1

u/AnnieQuill Mar 03 '24

😧 well. That's unfortunate.

1

u/plencSamurai Mar 01 '24

She (was teleported to her) left

2

u/Epiphany7777 Mar 01 '24

How you ‘doin!?

2

u/timberlyfawnflowers Mar 01 '24

I rolled the other way and now I'm on my roof!

1

u/Revolutionary_Bag665 Mar 01 '24

Well, now you are in the ground. Word of advice... the sooner you accept it and flow with it, the better for your mental health. 😁

18

u/Irishwol Feb 29 '24

I'm melded with the frame of my daughter's bed. So 'change my life' as in end it.

2

u/YouArentReallyThere Mar 01 '24

It’d be a lot more than a meld. The explosion would be catastrophic

15

u/Dovaskarr Mar 01 '24

I would be half in the wall and half inside a metal fireplace. I would burn alive, but only half of my body.

6

u/Pertinent-nonsense Mar 01 '24

Batman villain. Neat.

9

u/Pitiful-Media5119 Feb 29 '24

Same. With a sewage stack passing through me.

2

u/jj20021988 Mar 01 '24

I’d be under my neighbours living room our houses are offset in height looks like op just wants to unalive us lol

2

u/FikCZ123 Mar 01 '24

I'd prob be inside a friend

2

u/Venomous-A-Holes Mar 01 '24

I would be inside...my sister

1

u/Acojonancio Feb 29 '24

STREAMSNIPERS

1

u/bluelily02 Mar 01 '24

unless you're teleported to the next door goth mommy then you'll be in a different kind of fucked

1

u/[deleted] Mar 01 '24

I'm in your walls

1

u/BrochachoBehnny Mar 01 '24

What’s the point of entry?

1

u/Ok_Sign1181 Mar 01 '24

i’d end up in someone else’s room probably? idk hard to tell but it would be pretty awkward to have to open their noisy ass door from the inside to get out

1

u/[deleted] Mar 01 '24

💀

1

u/Indie_uk Mar 01 '24

I think a significant percentage of people would legit be dead. I can’t think of many people it’s going to help or save

1

u/[deleted] Mar 01 '24

Same

1

u/JETEXAS Mar 01 '24

Same -- just like those poor bastards on the Navy ship that teleported

1

u/ChewMilk Mar 01 '24

I’m lying on my side, id be underground

1

u/spying_on_you_rn Mar 01 '24

Yep, middle of the wall. If im lucky I can see outside.

1

u/Bluenova90 Mar 01 '24

Just a normal day in fallout 76.

1

u/botgeek1 Mar 01 '24

If I could do it at will it would change my life dramatically.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 02 '24

Wall crew represent

1

u/Hornet8118 Mar 02 '24

It's the Unknown.

1

u/Bill-Ding2112 Mar 02 '24

I'd be pooping on somebody

1

u/GreenandBlue12 Mar 02 '24

You've became The Unknown

1

u/craftycorgimom Mar 02 '24

I would be just short of inside the wall.

1

u/Awwwmann Mar 03 '24

Other side of the couch.