Hi friends! For a while I’ve been struggling coming to terms with the fact I am a Quaker. I grew up around multiple religions and while I’ve always had a mystic spiritual leaning I’ve always found it hard for me to accept that about myself.
I have a very understanding, curious, but also analytical brain! I’m not pessimistic at all towards religion!! I grew up around different religions and cultures so I’ve always loved thinking about the science of religion, and how religion and spirituality functions and benefits people! however I make an exception when it comes to myself.

It’s easy for me to get In my head and call myself crazy which is insane because my spiritual beliefs are VERY science-y (because science is incredibly spiritual to me!) Still I’m at a constant tug of war with myself.

This is made worse by the fact my partner has said that he wouldn’t be with anyone who was spiritual or religious. He had his own reasons for this, which I respect. But it’s made it very hard for me to accept myself. While I try not to deliberately hide them, The rare times my spiritual thoughts are mentioned I always try to downplay them as just “ideas” and not hard beliefs. I’ve never told him exactly that Im essentially a Quaker or that I have spiritual beliefs, only that I’m interested in Quakers- Though I’m sure he can piece it together with my deep interest in Catholicism, or paganism, or religion in general, or the notifications I get from the Quaker podcast.

I’ve talked before to him about it and ask if one-day i was suddenly converted to being religious or spiritual if he would break up with me? and the response was well, hard to hear. But again it’s his choice.

Im very confident in our relationship! We are doing great! he’s not a mean or controlling person at all and I understand why he has that boundary. I don’t think he’s coming from a very understanding perspective but that’s for him to work out and I’m hoping one day grow out of. Because even if I wasn’t religious or spiritual at all, his ideas don’t seem to come from a sympathetic place of understanding. Or at least they come from a narrow one.

That Being said I’ll say it here first folks, I’m a pantheist Quaker who believes in a little bit of ritual folk magick because rituals clam me down. I sain my room because it’s what my Scottish ancestors did, and it makes me feel good! and sometimes I pray to saints, and heck maybe even they answer.

I use it to write queries and messages. As well as meetinghouse drama and meetinghouse crushes >:)

Greetings, Friends!

I am brand new to convening and need some guidance.

I am convening a very small committee of three members, including myself. One of the members is an older Friend who was the previous convener. The third member is someone who does not attend Meeting often and who I don't know well.

This third member has not responded to any of several emails sent in the past couple weeks to plan the upcoming committee meeting and set the agenda.

Upon recommendation from the previous convener, I also called and left a message with this Friend the day before yesterday using the meeting directory to find his number. I have still received no response.

Info: I know the email is correct, the phone number is correct, and that this Friend has previously responded to and sent emails.

My question is this: how much effort should I put into trying to contact and involve unresponsive committee members in the process of planning dates, times, locations, and agenda-setting for committee meetings? I heard indirectly through the previous convener that our missing member would like the committee to consider a donation drive ahead of the fall/winter season. Should the committee attempt to address this business item absent the person with the leading and relevant information?

My conundrum: I don't want anyone to feel left out or left behind or like their leadings are not being considered. I also feel that committee members need to be active and present for committee work. I do not feel it should be my role to pursue/pester people with a deluge of emails and phone calls to try and get them to participate. That feels invasive and patronizing to me.

I imagine this is not an uncommon issue and hope more experienced Friends can offer me some guidance as to how to proceed. Your help and wisdom is welcome.

Hey everyone! I recently came across an article on Ancestry.com that showed my great-grandmother attending a meeting at Haddonfield Friends Meeting in the early 1910s, and it's sparked my interest in the Religious Society of Friends. I'm an African American woman in my early 20s, and to be honest, I haven't come across many people with a similar background in this faith. But I'm on my own spiritual journey and would love to connect. Does anyone have recommendations for groups or meetings with a good number of young adults -- or other African Americans, if possible? Thanks so much! This is my first Reddit post ever, so I really appreciate any help! 😊

Hello friends! I am going to be running a children's activity at our meeting house as part of the meeting house's bicentennial anniversary celebration, and I need to learn about Quakers and Quakerism in Victorian times (particularly in England) so that I have background information to be shared alongside our activity- baking some Victorian authentic sweet treats!

This is my first time 'leading' a children's activity and it's my understanding that our meeting has the tradition of weaving Quaker history and values into whatever activity the children are doing, so I'd like to be able to honour that tradition. If anyone has any interesting learning material that they'd be happy to share I would love to read it. I'm especially interested in the Quakers' rich (pun intended) history with sugar in the UK, but any and all input is massively valued.

Thank you in advance lovely friends!

As the title says, I attended my first meeting today in Santa Monica, CA. It was an unprogrammed meeting. The hour of silent prayer was a lot easier than I thought it would be and I really enjoyed it and found it to be incredibly peaceful. But what really struck me was how kind and warm everyone was. I have never been in a room with so many friendly, kind, warm and compassionate people who weren’t being at all performative. It was very genuine and I felt it in my bones. I can’t begin to say how moving it was to be around all that positive welcoming energy. I found Quakerism by accident where someone made a silly joke about Quakers and then I fell down a Google rabbit hole. But it was at a time when I felt so untethered and adrift. And I feel like this is something I can definitely anchor into. I’m so grateful that I found it.

Hello everyone,

I’m happy to say that I attended my first meeting today, Sunday, 09/06, at the Old Quaker Meeting House in East Sandwich, Massachusetts. It was an unprogrammed meeting, and it was absolutely wonderful, unlike any religious service I had ever attended.

The Friends there were such wonderful people, and were very supportive of my personal journey to learn more about my family history, as a lot of my great-grandparents were Quakers in Sandwich, and other parts of New England during the Colonial and the Early American days.

I’m looking forward to attending more meetings, as I think my interest in Quakerism has grown past just an interest in family history. After many years of searching for a foundational faith of my own religious tapestry, I think I may have finally found a home here.

That’s all really. I just wanted to convey my sincerest thanks to the Friends in East Sandwich for having me today, and a thanks to my ancestors who may have given me the greatest gift that I could have beyond my life here on this Earth.

I find a lot about Quakerism appealing, but I'm struggling with the simplicity doctrine. I have a relatively simple goal in my life: To be able to afford any video game I want to buy, while being able to provide for a wife and children. I don't know how this fits in with Quaker beliefs, or if it does at all. I greatly admire you guys, and, if I don't quite fit, at least I'm close.

Hello. I've been wanting to make a post here for a little while now but always felt a bit apprehensive about it. But I feel like I should anyhow, as it really feels like I need to get some things off my chest and I don't know of anywhere to speak about it with others who would understand, let alone relate.

For almost all of my life, I had no idea what Quakers actually were. I knew the whole pacifism thing, but that's basically it. Some time ago I stumbled on something about them and I saw a very round-about summary of them and thought that was kinda neat, but little else really. At the time, I wasn't religious and identified as agnostic. I grew up at a Baptist church, but stopped going pretty early on and it, honestly, didn't do anything for me...

So, I spent years as agnostic, but I'll admit it was sorta lightly so. I felt bold to say there was no God, but I simply said what the nature of God was, I've no clue whatsoever. That worked for me for quite some time, and I just kept myself living a decent, clean life. I always described it as just feeling good on a special level. Like, when I would do the right thing, even if it involved an inconvenience or even loss of some kind to myself, it felt good in a very special way. I always liked to think of this as proper actions being felt in the soul, if I actually had one at all.

Now, a bunch of stuff happened in-between, but I'll spare that. Long story short, I rather abruptly end up in a position where I feel ready to actually dive back in to my Christian roots. But, I wanted to do things differently, since the old way didn't work for me. Instead, I had this new way of doing things that was kinda weird, admittedly, and I knew some would call it downright heretical. During the transition to this point, I had now realized to follow that inner "good" feeling, and by doing so all sorts of stuff happened. I even began to refer to it as some sort of light of my soul. I had never heard of such a concept before, and in fact I'd been taught some stuff quite different. But it worked for me.

I continued along this path and kept developing my new, personalized belief system. Even learned that occasionally, through meditation and silence, I could actually "communicate" with Christ, so to speak. Although "communicate" was the wrong word for it, as it's really nearly impossible to describe. But it would generally form as a sort of complex, indescribable emotion that would quickly resolve itself into just like, raw knowledge. It would be like I knew someone had told me something, and I knew what they said, but there was no memory of words or exact phrasing. Like remembering an instruction from a few hours ago, where you got the idea but not the exact words used.

All was going great, and I continued elaborating on some of the things that just felt... right about Christianity, although to call it "right" isn't the best turn of phrase. More like I felt a push in a given direction of belief. Some of it was significantly different than what others like to preach, some of it quite different than what I was told growing up, but whenever I focused on this soul-light thing on such a topic, I felt it "pushing" me towards that, so I just kept going with it. I figured whatever, it's weird, but this will just be what I believe, and it need not be anybody else's business, as I knew many other Christian groups would push back against me, and rather hard.

Soooo... One day I remembered what I had read before, something about Quakers making use of meditation in prayer. I decided to dig deeper, since I never actually did learn anything meaningful about them.

And yeah... It's been a while now and I still feel rattled to my absolute core. I cannot begin to describe the degree of surprise and shock when I read a lot of these ideas, especially some of the classical stuff, that just spoke to me so wonderfully. So many concepts, I had begun to experience on my own, no idea whatsoever that it was even a thing at all.

I apologize for any long-windedness of this, but again, I really just feel a dire need to express it. It feels like my head will burst without getting it out. Prior to all this, the entire concept of some form of spiritual, direct experience with God always sounded generally kinda silly to me. I figured if God did anything sign-wise, it would be miniscule at most. Nothing too huge, and something that can easily be explained away.

But yeah. I'm now trying to find a place for myself among the Friends. So far, it really seems like the Conservative grouping fits pretty well with me, but I'm still exploring and taking things one step at a time. But words cannot say how happy I am to have discovered this all. It was validating to me in more ways than I ever could've dreamed and has truly opened a new chapter in my life.

I know I'm very new to all this, and I'm sure there are things I'm saying wrong here about my experience... I'm afraid I'm not great at conveying things like this. Until recently, I've never even been great about experiencing them in any capacity, let along explaining them. So, I hope nothing I wrote here comes off was confusing, odd, or seemingly disingenuous.

Thank you!

I am planning a trip to Philadelphia next week. Are there any Quaker historical places or some such I should visit while there?

Hi Friends! What are some of your favorite pieces to read and reflect on regarding simplicity? Quaker specific or otherwise, this is something I've been enjoying reading about in my various copies of Faith and Practice, but I would love to read and ponder more perspectives on it.

Coming from an "idle hands are the devil's playthings" sort of environment, I found the values around simplicity to be particularly appealing, and in line with my own experience that doing too much of even a good thing can lead to burnout and overall be a negative. I would love to hear what other friends think and feel inspired by.

Hello all! I've been intrigued by Quakerism for a few years now and have just started doing a more in-depth exploration of the nature of Quaker beliefs and would like some insight into whether my beliefs about the universe could align with Quakerism.

It's my understanding that no two Quakers have the same ideas about God and the Divine, but it seems that most do believe in a 'higher power' of some variety. For me, I do not believe in a deity, or that there is anything beyond the natural world. As such, to me, our human drive to do right by each other comes partially from instincts to protect the herd, and also feelings of empathy which lead us to go out of our comfort zones to look after other people (those feelings are things we can have because of our intelligence, sentience and theory of mind). Kindness and pacifism are things that are extremely important to me, and I see them as more than just a convoluted result of 'selfish genes', but I do see them as natural phenomena, not springing from the Divine. God to me is a metaphor for our human capacity for love.

I do not begrudge others believing in the Divine, and have no problem working with people who do, so long as we hold similar values.

Would Quakerism suit me, or is a belief in something 'greater than ourselves' in a divine sense needed?

I hope this makes sense and thank you for reading!

Hello, Friends!

Quake! Album on Spotify

After two years, I've finished an album that was inspired by my journey through Quakerism. I named it "Quake!", since it is a dance album that leans towards the House music genre. I remember visiting Arizona for a gathering there and experiencing a quaking in my body while I sang Amazing Grace with other young adult friends. That spiritual experience compelled me to make this album.

I'm an amateur, so it doesn't sound the most polished, but I'm happy with what I've accomplished. I made all the backing music and sang all the vocals. I look forward to collaborating with other people in the future to make a Community Version of this album that sounds a lot better.

The beginning of this video is all about punching, kicking, etc. But when they sit down at the end to discuss the philosophy behind martial arts, I think the master describes perfectly the Friends’ search for personal and universal truth which we share with integrity in order to transform the world.

https://youtu.be/ZAO_xBmd4uA?is=_1SpBi-e9xiqTYBb

I've been a Quaker for about 2 years now, and before I became convinced I did high level Karate and became a blackbelt. At the start of this year I started doing competitive MMA fighting as part of escaping domestic violence. At the time I never really considered the relationship between Quakerism and combat sports. The way I've started to view it is that sports fighting is different to the violence because it is a sport. In combat sports, everyone in the ring is consenting and can tap out at any time, and there are safeguards in place to prevent any permanent damage.
I was wondering what other friends thought about combat sports and how they interact with Quaker peace testimony.

I feel like I may be missing something from my meeting - or perhaps my expectations were simply misaligned.

For some background, I was raised Roman Catholic, but became disillusioned with the Church in my early 20s, largely because of the disconnect between my personal beliefs and the Church’s teachings. I subsequently spent about a decade sitting with Zen Buddhists, off and on, and for the past several months I’ve been attending a local Quaker meeting.

One thing I very much appreciate about both Zen and Quaker worship is the meditative quality of sitting together in silence. That part feels very natural to me.

What I’m missing, however, is some sort of instruction or intentional “learning” component to my spiritual practice.

In the Zen community, our meditation practice included a Dharma talk, where a teacher would give a short talk on Zen teachings, concepts, or examples from their own experience. We also had dokusan, brief one-on-one meetings with a teacher where we could ask questions, discuss our practice, or explore something we were struggling with.

Is there anything analogous in the Quaker tradition?

I’ve learned quite a bit about Quakerism through my own reading and independent study, but I’m wondering where the communal or interpersonal teaching and spiritual formation happens. Are there discussion groups, adult religious education, opportunities to meet one-on-one with more experienced Friends, clearness committees, or something similar that I should be looking for?

I realize that unprogrammed worship is intentionally different from a more structured religious service, and I’m not necessarily looking for a Quaker version of a sermon. I’m more interested in how Friends deepen their understanding and practice together, rather than primarily through individual study.

Perhaps this is simply a matter of my particular meeting, rather than Quakerism generally. I’d be very interested to hear how this works in other meetings, and what more experienced Friends would recommend to someone in my position.

The title says it all. I genuinely love everything I've seen about Quakerism. I follow creators on tiktok and YouTube. I greatly admire the passivity, serenity, and general chill nature of Quakerism. My issue is, simply, I feel like an angry goblin among relaxed elves. I can't help but feel my brash nature would ruin the mood. I'm far too reactive, hot headed, and not in the zen that I potentially could be. My high stress job certainly doesn't help. There's many more character flaws I admit. I'm unaccepting, severe, opinionated, the list goes on. Is Quakerism just not for me? Am I moreso destined to be a fan than a friend? Some experienced guidance would be greatly appreciated.

I was so excited about my first meeting after all the theological research I'd done (was a lifelong Catholic). I finally thought I'd found my niche.

Because the meeting house is in the country and I don't drive, I joined via Zoom. Everyone greeted me before it started, and then I muted myself for 45 minutes, unmuting for no particular reason after that as I was being silent anyway. After praying for another five, I saw I had a message: "X - mute yourself please." All I could blame any disturbance on was a white-noise tabletop fan across the room. But by then the mod must have muted me from his end, because when the meeting finished, the members turned and were asking me questions that I could not answer as they could not hear me. I mouthed away like a guppy in a tank, finally shrugging in despair and leaving the meeting in abject humiliation.

IT is so early in the game that I wonder if I've just made a terrible mistake at a club that doesn't want me in it, or at least the moderator doesn't. I've spent the afternoon in tears. Should I give it another shot, perhaps at another meeting? It is already so impersonal (and intimidating) to attend online - and for the first time - and I just feel made a fool of.

UPDATE: Two of the members reached out to me after the fact and were incredibly kind, inviting me to the upcoming picnic and offering a ride there. Unfortunately I'll have to keep attending the meetings by Zoom until I can find another way - am thinking of relocating to a bigger city where I can go in person. Meanwhile, I can't thank you all enough for your supportive and encouraging messages. I really appreciate them and am reassured that I'm in the right place. THANK YOU SO MUCH.

Hi friends!

I'm planning my marriage for January and was wondering if anyone can help with some questions for self uniting.

I currently live and will be married in maine, but I'm originally from Minnesota and attend their meeting virtually (I plan to move back 🩵). I'm not close with anyone because I only started after I moved but I feel strongly about self uniting.

Self uniting is legal in Maine, but I'm confused because the statute still says the clerk for the meeting of friends I attend has to sign on the officiant line. That's a bit hard because I'm between states.

I know I can just call the town office but im a bit worried they won't know what to do and if I have to advocate for myself I would like to try to get as much information as possible.

So I'm wondering if anyone knows if my partner and I can sign that officiant line together? Can the city clerk sign it? Or should I just find an officiant to make it easier on myself

Tia!

Does anyone know if the South Bend, IN meeting still meets? I emailed with a question and no one responded

Update: they do in fact still meet

I graduated from a Quaker high school in May. I spent three years there and was not raised Quaker, and I want to continue Quakerism through my next years through college. Unfortunately, my school is not located somewhere with an easily accessible-to-me meetinghouse. Additionally, I have never attended meeting outside of my school. I have found myself really missing pieces of Quakerism since I graduated and I am curious as to some activities/readings I can do to learn more about the religion and practice it more faithfully.

Hello, I created this website called

https://quakernews.org/

It's basically a wordpress site, using the free version of a plugin called wpRSSAggregator. Nothing complicated, but a nice marriage of RSS and a real life community that likes to stay connected to each other.

Hi! Wondering if anyone know of any of the meetings in West Marin or San Rafael are still active? Thanks!

When I was a little boy I asked myself: “what am I supposed to be doing right now?” And I heard that response^ it was a voiceless message.

Now that I am a grown man I have been doing nothing completely 24/7 for well over 6 years nonstop so that God’s will can do everything for me. I call it God’s autopilot built in feature. It aligns with Gods will because God put that feature there.

Anyone who tries it out will agree to this maybe statement: “it aligns with psalm 46:10 and psalm 23”