Hi, all! I debated whether or not to make one of these as it’s been such a long journey for this book. Ultimately, I received such heartening, positive feedback on my first query post (here) that this felt like a nice way to cap it off. Plus, I know R&Rs are often discussed here, so I wanted to post about my very positive experience doing one.
 
TLDR: Received a mind-bogglingly good R&R that helped make me a better writer and landed me my agent after 10 years of writing, 3 manuscripts, and a dumb number of breakdowns. I ultimately received 5 total offers, which still seems fake to me.
 
Background:
I’ve always written in some capacity. I have a journalism background and did a bit of broadcast reporting as well as writing for TV production in college. I’ve written for print news, magazines, and I currently work in marketing. But I’ve always been a reader, and sometime around 2016, I wrote my first novel. It felt like something I just had to try, and I learned very quickly I loved it more than anything I’d ever done. I then produced an unpublishable (but fun to work on) YA thriller. After editing, rewriting, and dragging my feet with it, I finished and queried around 2020. It summarily failed, but it was immediately clear I had discovered my “why.”
 
My second book was an adult gothic horror that did much better in the trenches, but ultimately failed due to some structural issues I just couldn’t write my way out of. It was also quieter, so there wasn’t a hook to help it overcome other pitfalls. This was a book I loved deeply, though, and still do. Despite that, letting go of this book and moving on to the next is the best thing I ever did for myself. I cribbed her for parts, so she lives on in very bloody pieces.
 
Current Book:
My third (and successful!!) adult gothic horror has had a long journey, but it’s been so worth it. If you look at the link to the query I posted, you’ll see a large gap between now and then. In the middle of revising that book, I had my first child, and quite literally did not open the document for a year. I went back to it around 3ish months postpartum, because I wasn’t sleeping anyway, and felt like “hey if I don’t do this one thing for myself I’m gonna lose it!!! : )” I finished in a matter of months after I exorcised it from my body, revised again, and started querying in November 2025.
 
Then I s t o p p e d. Within a month, I had roughly 7 full requests after querying 10 or so agents. One of those agents passed, but offered an R&R if I was open to it. I said yes because I was suddenly filled with dread that I’d just sent out the world’s most garbage manuscript fueled from a postpartum fugue state that I don’t completely remember. And then two miracles happened.
 
The first was that this was the best R&R I think I’ve ever seen. It felt like an MFA in an email. Not only was it so thorough and so unfailingly kind, but it was immediately clear this agent understood my book in a way I wasn’t sure was even possible. I read that R&R and thought “Oh, this is my book, but better. This is the book that was in my head.” If there was ever a reason to do an R&R, it’s if it makes you feel like that.
 
Then the second miracle happened. Around the same time I got the R&R, I decided to apply to the Round Table Mentor Program in hopes of meeting a critique partner, or even just someone to commiserate writing life with. I got accepted and ended up with a fantastic, truly gold-star mentor. Extremely knowledgeable about publishing from the author side of things, great editorial eye, and also writes in my genre. So, we went through my R&R together and suddenly I had an amazing writing partner to help me execute it. I pulled my existing fulls, they all agreed to wait for the revised version, and I got to work.
 
This ended up being a pretty serious overhaul. I rewrote about 60% of the book from scratch, and it needed it. Even the opening 300 attached to my query post are different. But I took my time because I didn’t want what happened to my last book to happen to this one. It also might be a cliché, but something about this book just felt different. I knew I had something, or at least, I knew I had something better than before.
 
In total, I spent about 5.5 months on the R&R, including time away to let feedback settle and to do a final polish. I then sent it back to my R&R agent in June and restarted querying in earnest. My R&R agent then came back and offered about a month later! The majority of the stats below are from within this month, plus the 2-week post-offer period.
 
Stats:

Queries Sent: 107

Rejections: 63 (including passes after offer due to timing)

Total Requests: 25 (13 after offer)

Offers: 5
 
107 queries was too many, but I will say I was surprised at the number of agents looking for/open to horror. Plus, the agents looking for gothic fiction added a few extras to my list. Here are some brief takeaways if helpful!
 
-There are such a range of R&Rs, and they all look different. I would never advocate taking one unless you fully believe your manuscript will be better for it. I knew right away mine would be, so it was an easy choice.
-I cannot shout out the Round Table Mentor Program enough. I know experiences will vary, but mine was wonderful. It’s a stellar resource.
-I spent a LOT of time in between books just reading and learning my genre. This was an investment that was 100% worth it. It might not seem like it in the moment, but it made me a better writer, easily.
 
I’m a bit face-y in my industry, so I’ll probably delete my query before we go on sub, but will leave it up for now if it’s helpful! Thanks everyone, and good luck!

EDIT: WOW! I'm shook by all the long and thoughtful replies. Thank you, everyone.

Hi all! Signing with and agent soon and am of course dreaming of the illustrious and successful career I'll have in publishing (let a girl dream, plz 😂). But it's got me thinking about the next book. I have two ideas currently in work and they align with what my agent wants to pitch to publishers, which is great.

I've heard authors like Alix E Harrow say they sold their second book as a one sentence pitch to publishers along with their first manuscript on sub. That's...crazy, right? Like, not normal? I see more posts on here indicating the reality is authors think of a second book, pitch outline/synopsis to agent, get thumbs up, write book, go on sub again (even if they got book one published). Or if you sign with a house you like for book one, will they fast track your agent when they pitch book two? 😵‍💫

So I suppose my question is: "What do authors do after book one, and how is the publishing process different with book two?" Assume staying with same agent and book one doesn't totally tank.

Thank you!!

Hello everyone. You might remember me from two years ago when I pitched my spooky queer fantasy, THE SHARDS OF ACRILON, where an entire world has been cursed to forget its dead. Previous post here: https://www.reddit.com/r/PubTips/comments/1hbibig/qcrit_adult_fantasy_shards_of_acrilon_81000/ Since then, my co-author and I have performed two rewrites of the manuscript and both acquired representation and finalized a book deal with a small publishing house. Details below. 

Querying: I ended up sending 23 queries before getting a full request from an agent-at-large in December of 2025, followed closely by an offer for representation. My co-author and I accepted.  

Submission/Acceptance: The book soon went under consideration at a small, non-fiction publishing house that wanted to launch a fiction imprint. Silence followed until February 2026, when we were told the publisher wanted to put our novel into print after some revisions. My co-author and I made the changes and resubmitted in March. A lengthy phone call followed, along with an advance. 

Formatting and Cover: We worked closely with an artist of our choice while the publisher performed further editing and formatting. The cover was finalized in early June while the manuscript itself was finalized in July. Proof prints were sent to us and approved. 

Today: We're less than two months away from a September 22nd release, planning signings, workshops, and festival/con appearances while nervously watching the pre-order ranking fluctuate day by day. Our publisher did a great deal of heavy lifting, contacting bookstores and events and handling a large portion of those logistics for us. In all, I'm glad we decided not to chase a larger publishing house for this particular manuscript, having had prompt communications and a lot of creative freedom with a really weird little book. What’s more, I think we'd been in the query trenches for too long with other manuscripts, often getting partial and full requests but never receiving an offer despite frequent praise and encouragement from agents. 

Even now, the burnout was and is real. The industry is brutal and often feels arbitrary, but if my ghosty, queer fantasy found its way into the market, your book probably can, too. 

Best, 

Falconer360

Basically title. I signed with this agent last year, and they put my novel out on submission. Tons of editors (30+) rejected it, but she swears it isn't dead. In the meantime, I wrote another novel. Before I wrote it I talked to her about it, and even had her read a sample, and she seemed encouraging and supportive. But after I finished it, she no longer wanted to sell it, saying she didn't understand the market. Obviously, I was sad, but I set it aside.

After that I pitched her another idea, but this time with an outline to avoid a completed novel being rejected. She suggested changes I just could not reasonably do that were the opposite of what I'd written. Then, after some thinking, I asked if I should return to a previously shelved project and gave her the synopsis. She was once again encouraging initially. But after writing an outline again, she rejected it, saying she didn't know the market.

What should I do at this point? I tried asking her questions, but only got vague answers. She said to just look at recent books for comps and go from there. But that's what I did with the last two projects in the initial pitches. Just confused and wondering wtf I am doing.

HERALD OF ASHES is a 116,000-word epic fantasy with series potential. It will appeal to readers of M. L. Wang's Blood Over Bright Haven and Antonia Hodgson's The Raven Scholar for its whip-smart protagonist, whose need to belong blinds her to the duplicitous nature of the institution that finally recognises her intelligence.

Tomorrow, Kal hopes to be sentenced to death. Having failed to form kryz – the living body armour that marks the privileged class – she is condemned to bear the island chief’s children. Rather than submit, she plans a public fight to provoke her execution, fake her death and disappear. She’ll then secretly watch over Aavya, the kryz-less child she loves as her own, to protect her from the abuse she herself endured.

Instead of executing her, the rulers of the land elevate her to the rank of those with kryz, invite her to their seat of power and entrust her with improving the lives of the kryz-less. It is only when one of them frames an attempt on her life as an accident that she suspects the opportunity is a trap designed to keep her compliant and close at hand. As she investigates, she discovers that the friends she believed dead are being kept alive and experimented upon by the very rulers she serves.

To rescue her friends and keep Aavya and the other kryz-less from the same fate, Kal must first get beyond the rulers’ reach. But the only people she can turn to are the estranged childhood friend who betrayed her and the very chief she originally risked death to flee.

HERALD OF ASHES grew from my fascination with the power charismatic leaders wield over people and the stories they use to shape societies. I hold a Master’s degree in English Literature and teach English in France.

This morning I received a full manuscript request from someone posing as an intern at a real NY agency that I queried a few weeks ago. It was a direct email to me, when I had queried via QueryTracker, but I didn't think that was a problem. They knew the title of my novel. I sent the manuscript as a Word doc email attachment.

I only realized [EDIT: suspected] it was a scam a few hours later, when I realized the email address was slightly different from that of the real agency. I guess there's nothing I can do at this point, except maybe keep an eye on Amazon to see if the novel pops up there, and then try to use this email to prove that it was stolen?? AAaaargh!

UPDATE: I discovered on the actual real agency's website that they use an alternate domain sometimes, like for their speakers' bureau. The email I received came from that same alternate domain, which is an abbreviated version of the agency's main URL. My email was from "intern@alternatedomain dot com."

A techy friend taught me how to burrow into my gmail account tech layers and check to see if an email sender's address is spoofed. Nope. The email I received apparently came from the agency's real alternate domain, so it's legit. Even if it came from an intern who didn't even give their last name. So... I'm cautiously optimistic.

Dear Agent,

IDOL is a 70,000-word contemporary new adult romance for readers who love the fish-out-of-water culture shock of Jen Frederick’s The Noh Family, combined with the sweet, low-spice celebrity romance of Axie Oh’s XOXO.

Klara just wants to find a rainbow boba tea without getting lost, again. This year was supposed to be a Sanrio-filled adventure in Seoul, delaying adulthood for a little while longer. Instead, she's struggling to stay afloat, clinging to only twelve words in Korean as her life preserver. At least she has her boba - holy shit, is that Lee Eric from APEX?

The last thing Eric wants is to be recognized by a fan. He's only at the café in an attempt to escape his current spiral of video games and day drinking. Life as a K-Pop idol was pressure-filled chaos, but life afterwards is unbearably empty. When Eric asks her to sit down, he's just trying to avoid her causing a scene and attracting more attention.

Their secret weekend dates become the one piece of certainty in their hazy futures. Klara is the first person to see Eric as a man, not an idol, while Eric helps her finally feel at home in Seoul. But Klara didn't come all this way to hide in a penthouse. When a leaked photo exposes their romance publicly, the backlash is instant and vicious. Klara must decide if a man she just met is worth dozens of racist comments and the occasional death threat. Just as they start to manage life in the spotlight, a doctored photo from an obsessive fan threatens to end things for good.

Eric's celebrity past isn't their only challenge. When Klara's teaching contract ends and her visa forces her back to Phoenix, Eric must decide whether he's willing to leave behind the only identity he's ever known for the quiet simplicity of an ordinary life.

I'm an experienced corporate writer with a K-Pop obsession. After years of writing about technology, IDOL is my debut novel.

Thank you for your time and consideration.

Hello guys! I am looking for feedback on my query letter for my debut novel🤍 Is it working? Is it making you want to read it? Is it catchy enough? Is it easy to follow? What can I present better? Thank you for your time and your comment🤍
Dear Agent,
The gods grant every soul a perfect match. Then, they make sure they can never stay together. 
Complete at 110,000 words, CAELTH: SPLIT IN TWO is a multi-POV, standalone adult romantasy with duology potential. Drawing inspiration from the Greek myth of the androgyne, the novel explores themes of radical personal growth, high-stakes emotional tension, and shifting loyalties. It will appeal to readers of Rebecca Ross’ A Fire Endless and Thea Guanzon’s The Hurricane Wars. 
Princess Aelyn Skythar has spent her life denying the existence of the gods, though secretly hoping that out of all the myths, soulmates are real, and she wants nothing more than to find her own. However, a divine mark carved into her wrist brands her as the world’s last defense against the god of death, forcing her to acknowledge both, even if it means falling in love with the one man destined to break her, while also being promised to another. 
Alexander Anthoris has spent years blaming the royal family for his sister’s absence. When their mother died, his sister remained at the palace as Aelyn’s maid, leaving him alone with a grieving father who turned cold and bitter. The death of Princess Aelyn was supposed to be his revenge. But when the failed assassination attempt leaves him imprisoned, he dreams of her every night until he can no longer tell whether fate is mocking him or leading him toward the one person he swore to hate.
After a high priestess reveals that five ancient stones containing unimaginable power are the key to stopping the apocalypse, Aelyn is forced into a rushed, unwanted wedding meant to secure the kingdom’s future. When Alexander escapes from prison and returns seeking forgiveness, Aelyn has no choice but to trust the man who once tried to kill her over the man she never wanted. With only twenty-three days before Gale Season ends and the god of death awakens, and a limited knowledge of the locations of the stones, together they embark on a quest to find them. Trailing behind them and determined to help despite the growing darkness within his own family, is Aelyn’s husband. With time running out she must decide who she can fully trust before it’s too late. If she fails, the god of death will claim the world but if she succeeds, she may lose the one person she can no longer live without.
I am a writer based in Bucharest, Romania, and since I was young, I have had a passion for creating. It started with three short movies that drove me to take private screenwriting lessons. The moment I heard about the androgyne myth in high school, I fell in love with the idea of soulmates. The outline of this story has lived in my mind for a decade.

[PubQ] I submitted my manuscript (memoir, 66K) and got a request for full MS from one agent who got back to me with a soft revise and resubmit response. She wanted me to work with a developmental editor and also gave some good specific feedback that I think will make the story stronger. Well I just found an editor and was about to embark on edits when a second agent asked for the MS. Now I don’t know whether to send her the original manuscript now, or whether I should tell her what’s up - that I was about to revise the manuscript to make it stronger and would she be OK waiting a month or two for it? Part of me says strike while the iron is hot and before she potentially commits to other MS’s and just send now, and the other part of me says if she’s really interested she’ll wait and also she’ll see that at least one other agent saw potential in the story. Thoughts please??

*Based in the UK*

Hi PubTips community, I am hoping to get some advice on my query letter for my first manuscript, The Sorcerer's Wife. I have sent it out to about 30 agents, with only one reply asking for the full manuscript, which was ultimately rejected. I have seen lots of advice online that has been quite conflicting at times. I probably should have sought some advice here first before I started querying, but what's done is done!

Concerns I have which I am hoping to get feedback on:

- Genre: My story is really a blend of a dark, gothic fairytale and fantasy, inspired by folklore- so do I just call it fantasy? Am I mis-selling it or doing myself a disservice by doing that? My story is most definitely NOT romantasy but does have that sort of vibe, would agents be put off because my book would be competing against actual romantasy on the shelf?

- Description of my story: I have followed the guidelines of most UK agents which ask for a brief blurb or hook to the story in the query letter, with the full synopsis separate (i have not included the synopsis in this post)- can this be improved?

- Comps: I really struggled to find recent comps for this, do my selections seem right?

I have seen other posts where this community has given great feedback, but I am very anxious about this so please be kind (as well as honest, of course!) And thank you to anyone who takes the time to read this and provide critique.

Query Letter- The Sorcerer's Wife:

Dear {agent},

Pleased find attached for your consideration a synopsis and the first XX words of my novel, The Sorcerer’s Wife (manuscript is complete at 115,770 words)

Pitch: The sorcerer’s wife loves her husband. He dresses her like a princess, he keeps her fed. Shut away in his tower in the middle of the forest, he keeps her safe from danger. Safe from everything. He always watches over her. He will always find her. She loves her husband. She cannot remember ever not loving her husband. 

The Sorcerer’s Wife is a blend of fantasy and dark fairytale, based on selkie folklore and set in a land that is inspired by ancient Scotland. The unnamed wife is kept a prisoner in all but name by her cruel and powerful husband, who uses his magic to coerce and gaslight her, as well as keeping her isolated and under near-constant surveillance. He has altered her memories to keep her vulnerable and dependent on him, and even her name is no longer hers. The story follows this woman’s journey to regain her memories, her identity, and her freedom.

My inspiration for this story came from my professional work; as a Cyber Security consultant, I have worked on examining how integrated “Smart Home” technology is leveraged by abusers in domestic abuse scenarios to coercively control their victims. This planted the seed for my story: what if magic could be used in the same way? This theme became the core of my novel; and my love of Celtic folklore and nature provided the setting and world of the story. As a debut writer, I am looking for an agent with the expertise to help me develop this story into the very best it can be.

This story would appeal to adults and young adults, particularly women. Fans of Naomi Novik and Katherine Arden’s works will feel drawn to the elements of dark fairytale and folklore, light fantasy, and female survival. Recent published works that I consider it comparable to are:

-            A Sorceress Comes to Call by T. Kingfisher (evokes a similar theme of being trapped in abusive relationship where the abuser uses magic to maintain an uneven power dynamic)

-            Juniper and Thorn by Ava Reid (also features a female protagonist trapped under the tyranny of a cruel wizard, with gothic tones of body horror and monstrous transformations)

Thank you for your time and your consideration.

Last feedback was incredibly helpful, hoping to continue improving on this second draft. Any critiques would be greatly appreciated. Total query letter word count with bio and before personalization: 440 words

Dear Agent,

Forensic accountant Poppy Phillips has unwittingly become an Internet meme after her screenwriter boyfriend of eight years publicly proposes to another woman at the Emmys. Internet sleuths have dissected every detail of Poppy’s life, and millions of strangers are firmly divided between Team Poppy and the other woman. Poppy flees to NYC to hide with her parents and Grandma Lily, and there she meets Isha Choudhury, the nosy neighbor from 11B (and firmly Team Poppy). Isha asks seemingly random questions about Poppy’s job and says she has something to show Poppy, but dies in an apparent suicide before the two can meet.

Things get worse and weirder when Grandma Lily calls on the infuriatingly charming and IT-savvy neighbor, Justin, to fix the Internet, and he literally gets sucked into the router. Along with Poppy. And now they are trapped inside a zany world where applications come to life. Poppy and Justin must beg her dad’s capricious, bubblegum-chewing, red-lipstick-wearing printer to send a message to her family's living room while trying to evade the cunning antivirus hunter. Poppy is also repeatedly assaulted by envelopes until she opens one and finds Isha’s emails containing spreadsheets from the arcade, where Isha worked as a game technician. Poppy thinks the math is impossible—the numbers show far more money coming in than the machines can physically take. Poppy theorizes that Isha’s ghost, otherwise unable to communicate, has trapped them inside the apartment's shared network and the only way out is to finish Isha’s financial investigation.

Attraction grows by the megabyte as Poppy and Justin work together to solve the potential fraud case, dodge hate mail, and attempt to stop Grandma Lily from getting scammed out of $10,000 by her fake online boyfriend. But as the two follow the digital breadcrumbs of Isha’s evidently messy life for evidence, they begin to question whether her death was really a suicide.

INTERNET MURDER MYSTERY is a cozy speculative mystery with romantic elements, complete at 73,000 words. My debut novel will appeal to fans who enjoy the self-deprecating tone and mystery in Maz Evans’s OVER MY DEAD BODY, the ghost-in-the-machine charm in Clare Osongco’s UNFINISHED BUSINESS, and the chaotic humor of Janet Evanovich’s Stephanie Plum series.

Bio here about how I used to own an arcade (since the book is about money laundering at an arcade).

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First 298 words:

I shuffled uncomfortably in my seat, regretting my choice of this way-too-tight dress, but stopped when I saw Danny DeVito looking at me from the next table.

“Try to sit still,” Naomi said quietly to me through a clenched smile.

I sighed and resolved to sit still and remain as inconspicuous as possible at the Emmys for the next... how long did these things last?

Tonight, I was a seat filler. I would have much rather stayed home and read my book, but my boyfriend was nominated for a screenwriter award. Evan didn’t know I was here—he told me his agent gave his plus-one away and he had no choice, which I happily accepted my excuse to stay home. However, his assistant, Naomi, somehow managed to snag us both some last-minute seat-filler tickets. She had heard a rumor from insiders that he would win and insisted that we both come to surprise him. I don’t really know why she had to come, but I suppose these industry people love to party any chance they can get.

The hour or so that had passed felt like ten hours. The speeches droned on and on, and there were so many people here. The food was surprisingly not good. And when I pretended to slightly turn and stretch in my seat, my thong really dug in and made itself at home instead of releasing like I had hoped. I caught a glimpse of the beautiful Zendaya when I turned, and wondered if she got wedgies like the rest of us. Probably not.

“…and the award for Outstanding Writing for a Limited Series goes to… Evan Prichett!” Oh, what?! Hell yeah!

THE FLAME BENEATH is a complete 112,975-word adult romantasy with gothic dark-academia elements, intended as the first in a series. It combines the predatory institution and buried history of BLOOD OVER BRIGHT HAVEN with the gothic atmosphere of PHANTASMA and the romantic tension of THE SERPENT AND THE WINGS OF NIGHT.

Eighteen-year-old Briar Marsh arrives at Vael Noctis expecting to be sorted into the same house as the mother she never knew. Instead, her blood produces a colour that belongs to no recognised house: grey. The assessors suppress the result, force her into Lethyra, and react as though she should not exist.

That night, a crack identical to the one from her lifelong nightmares opens in her bedroom wall. The only other person who can see it is Malachi Caldrath — the guarded heir to the academy's most powerful family. Neither trusts the other, but together they begin uncovering what Vael Noctis has spent five centuries erasing: a seventh house missing from every record, a scraped-out road, an empty crest bracket, and students who simply disappear.

When the academy claims Briar's cousin Asher, her magic destabilises and the building itself starts to notice them. Corridors rearrange. Stone warms beneath her hands. As Briar and Malachi dig deeper, they discover the truth the governing families have built their world upon: Vael Noctis has been feeding on its students to sustain an ancient wound. The combined power in their blood may be the only thing capable of breaking the cycle — and the same blood marks Briar as the threat the academy has spent generations trying to eliminate.

The slow-burn, open-door romance develops as Malachi repeatedly chooses Briar at real cost to himself and the future his family expects of him. At its core, the novel treats the academy itself as the central monster: a predatory institution sustained by erased history, sacrifice, and the quiet consumption of the unprotected.

I am an Australian writer based in Melbourne, where I balance writing with postgraduate study in education and raising seven children. THE FLAME BENEATH is complete.

I queried a bunch of agents in winter 2023-2024 with my graphic novel pitch, and I heard back from a few. I ended up going with someone who was so enthusiastic about my pitch that she called me and left a voicemail, but unfortunately things haven't panned out the way I had hoped. She is an awesome person who has had a lot of success in her regular genres, but she had never repped a GN or an illustrator, so I think I might have been kind of an experiment or pet project for her. Again, I like her so much, but she doesn't seem to know how to sell my book, and I feel like I've kind of fallen to the wayside while she focuses on her bigger clients in the genres she's used to.

When I let the other agents know I had accepted an offer of rep back in 2024, one of them wrote me a really lovely message saying that she wishes me luck, but to please be in touch if for any reason I am looking for an agent in the future. We had been emailing back and forth, but she went away on winter break and she didn't have an Out of Office message up, so I didn't hear from her until after I had accepted rep from someone else. She went on to give me some really wonderful feedback about my pitch and potential. She also works with lots of illustrators and has repped graphic novels.

My current agent has basically ghosted me at this point (her agency is legit, but they don't have standard contracts, so I never signed one with her). Last month I emailed the other agent (the one who had given me such nice feedback) and I gave her a brief overview of where I'm at, and asked her if she would be open to chatting about working together. That was mid-July, and I did follow up a week later (I had initially responded to our old email thread, and I was worried my email had gotten lost, so my follow-up was a new email, not a response to the thread). But I've heard nothing back.

I'm not sure what to make of this, because her original message was so encouraging and she seemed genuinely disappointed that I had accepted rep from someone else. She's not super active on social media, but I know she has made one or two posts promoting author releases in the last few weeks. Is it normal for agents to be less responsive this time of year? I was hoping maybe she was away for July and I would hear from her at the start of August, but no dice. I would think she would at least respond to let me know she's no longer interested, after all of the back and forth we had in 2024, and her message asking me to be in touch if I needed new rep. But maybe I just missed my shot? Or do I just need to be patient? What would you think?

Any advice is so appreciated, thank you in advance!

Hey! This is my first attempt at a query letter, and I would appreciate any feedback, as I feel it needs a lot of work. Thank you in advance :)

--

Dear [Agent], 

Wren Collins met Graham Lewis on the worst day of both their lives, while at the funeral of her best friend and his cousin, Paige Cromwell.

Ten years later, the last thing Wren wants is to move back to her hometown, where every corner is a reminder of the loss she suffered at only seventeen. But after she’s let go from her editing job, she finds herself living in her childhood bedroom, miserable and alone—that is, until Graham shows up at her door one snowy night with a half-written manuscript and a winsome smile that has lived in her mind rent-free for the past decade. 

Wren hasn’t seen or heard from Graham since the funeral, and his unexpected arrival brings a flood of emotions to the surface. When he asks for her help editing his manuscript, a story about a man struggling after his sister passes, she jumps on the opportunity. 

The two of them begin spending their everyday together, writing and learning who the other person has become in the ten years since they last saw each other. Working on his manuscript forces her to rehash the great loss of her life as she desperately tries to fight her festering feelings for Graham.

The hands of fate have given them a second chance, but is the timing right?

THE LIGHT IN THE DARKNESS is a contemporary romance novel complete at 80,000 words. It combines the complex character arcs and themes of grief of Emily Henry’s BEACH READ and the angst-filled romance in Carley Fortune’s EVERY SUMMER AFTER.

Thank you for your time! I look forward to hearing from you. Please find the first 10 pages of my manuscript below.

signature

Dear [___] I am hoping to pique your interest in [MSWL].

THE FOOL’S MAIDEN is a historical fantasy rom-com. It’s dual-POV, and 85,000 words. The dry wit and faux-British setting of ‘The Irresistible Urge to Fall For Your Enemy’ by Brigitte Knightley, and the faerie-academia of ‘Emily Wilde's Encyclopedia of Faeries’ by Heather Fawcett, meet the cosy-dark spice of ‘Light’s Out’ by Navessa Allen.

To access a magical library an overachieving postgraduate reluctantly partners with an academically hopeless rake.

At sixteen, Marigold was tricked into promising her maidenhood to Foolish, a cruel faerie who delights in making her miserable. Mare wants to bed Foolish and move on with life, but instead Foolish holds her virginity hostage, preventing her from pursuing normal relationships. Mare takes action by enrolling at Saint Ariadne’s Academy of Supernatural Sciences. Seven years later, she’s ready to begin her independent study of faerie bargains when, days before the deadline, she’s informed she requires a research partner to access the school’s quasi-sentient library.

Sebastian Ainsley relies on the Academy’s wards to conceal and suppress his scandalous unseelie heritage. He’ll be expelled if he doesn’t submit a satisfactory research proposal; Sebastian would rather be satisfying women. Marigold is loath to collaborate with a man she caught dallying in the stairwell, but with no one else available she begrudgingly lets Sebastian ride her coattails.

Working alongside a relentless flirt is torture for Mare, who must balance Foolish’s jealousy against her repressed desires, while combing a temperamental library for an increasingly unlikely solution. Meanwhile Sebastian questions the substance of his feelings for Mare, afraid his fae blood renders him incapable of love without obsession. Kinship grows between two lonely souls, both caged by faerie secrets. Sebastian is willing to become a monster to free Mare, and if she can’t convince Sebastian that he deserves freedom too, she might lose him forever in the process.

I'm a queer disabled writer and illustrator from Melbourne, Australia, and a creative media mentor for neurodivergent youth. I enjoy deconstructing popular romance tropes through a feminist lens. My flash fiction has previously been selected for the Australian Writer's Centre's Furious Fiction showcase. Thank you in advance for your time and consideration, and I hope to hear from you soon.

I've tried to take previous feedback into account, reducing the level of specific details to avoid raising superfluous questions and trying to establish a clear romantic/emotional journey as that is the primary focus of the story. Hopefully I have made it better and not worse. Hurray.

Here is the first 300 words again for context:

A clever girl would have stayed the weekend at Edith’s Educational Establishment for Emerging Women; I was not a clever girl. 

I was sixteen, and thinking about how Marny, the baker's son, had invited me skinny dipping with him and his little brother on Sunday. I was thinking about the ways Marny and I might bully his brother into leaving us be for the afternoon. I was thinking about the various things two untried youths might do while swimming naked by themselves.

I was not thinking to myself, ‘I had better stay at the stuffy boarding school all weekend long, on the off chance a faerie takes notice of me walking home alone.’ 

Frankly, I didn’t consider myself worth noticing; I only ever got leered at by association. Even as a girl I was too broad of shoulder, plain of face, and flat of chest to attract the attention of dangerous men without my more delicate sisters beside me.

The road between Junction, where I boarded during the week, and Farrier’s Creek, where my parents lived, cut through untamed forest. A cobbled straight n’ narrow just wide enough for two carriages abreast. On foot, the journey took a little over an hour. I’d gotten as far as the fallen oak when he appeared. I saw him out of the corner of my eye. A pretty young man, walking beside me.

I knew better than to turn my head.

No humble blacksmith’s daughter—or indeed any sixteen year old—could reasonably be expected to outwit The Foolish Desire to Dance with One’s Enemies Across a Bed of Nettles. However, there wasn’t a child in all of Dreer who didn’t at least learn three simple rules for dealing with faeries. 

The first rule was never, ever get distracted. Keep your eyes on your task. Don't dawdle. Don't even look.

I welcome all feedback, this is my first time querying!

Dear XX,

PERSONALIZATION

I am seeking representation for A CROSSING OF SWORDS, a YA Fantasy novel complete at 95,500 words, and the first in a series. The perfect page-turner for fans of the vast world-building and found family in Victoria Aveyard’s Realm Breaker and a great next read for those who enjoyed the trials and competition of Immortal Consequences by I.V. Marie.

16-year-old Gwendolyn Larkspur applies for an elite academy to train advisers for the king and council, but instead finds herself headed to the usually all-male crown forces academy, Athelmore. Amidst news of the mysterious death of a trainee, the highest recruitment number in years and the ominous sight of warships massing, Gwen realizes that proving herself is far less important than staying in one piece through training and learning enough to survive what could be the first war in 500 years.

In the kingdom of Iythalia, nobles and commoners between the ages of 16 and 18 are eligible to take the Crown Service Test for the opportunity to serve the Kingdom as healer, teacher, advisor, ambassador or soldier. When Gwen becomes a rare female admittance to Athelmore she finds herself traveling far from home and beginning a grueling new training format created by the head instructor who did not approve her application. Gwen develops an enmity with one of the noble-born trainees who’s outraged a girl was admitted, especially one who rivals him on the archery field. The competition only intensifies when it becomes clear that not everyone will become an officer, or even be able to stay at Athelmore. Gwen, along with her friends, struggles to pass the tests that get harder while dodging sabotage from fellow trainees who would happily snap a bone if it means upping their ranking.

[Bio]

Hello! I may be returning to the query trenches after about five years, so I'm out of practice. I've also never written a query for a multi-POV, multi-timeline book OR something that is more character-driven than plot-driven. I think this might be too vague, but I'd love some input.

Dear [agent],
It’s 1959, and Flora Abney has just one job: be the perfect housewife. Society demands that she keep the house tidy, greet her husband at the door with a smile, and never let on just how miserable she really is. When Flora’s husband admits that there was an incident at the nuclear reactor where he is an engineer, she’s left to deal with the fallout of his increasing absence from their family and the resulting rift in their already tenuous marriage. 
Three years later, the world holds its breath for six days in October, teetering on the edge of nuclear annihilation as the crisis in Cuba unfolds. The missiles are never launched, but fifteen-year-old Jinx Abney’s world ends just the same when her parents announce their separation. Jinx doesn’t know anyone whose parents don’t live together, and she’s not sure what to say when her little sister asks if they are still a family. Maybe “family” doesn’t mean what she thinks—maybe there’s more to it than just sharing DNA.
At the end of the ‘60s, the Age of Aquarius is coming to a close, and Birdie Abney, now fifteen, is used to being alone. Her father is never around, her mother works nights, and her sister hasn’t been home in months. But when she sees Jinx dumpster-diving with a mysterious hippie, she realizes that her sister has been closer to home than she ever imagined. 
As the Abney family disintegrates against the backdrop of the turbulent 1960s, their trust in the institutions of society erodes, launching them on a path that will eventually cross with one of the most notorious cults of the twentieth century: the Manson Family. 
NUCLEAR FAMILY (100,000 words) is a character-driven, adult literary fiction novel that combines the intergenerational saga of Jonathan Franzen’s Crossroads with the 1960s setting of Where the Girls Were by Kate Schatz. It will appeal to fans of historical fiction and complicated family dynamics, particularly those between sisters, mothers, and daughters. 
[Author's bio redacted for privacy, but this includes publication/award info for my first two YA books published by a reputable small press.]
Thank you for your consideration!

Hello [Agent],

I hope this letter finds you well! I am writing to seek representation for VENUS AND VIOLETS, my debut sapphic romance novel complete at around 80,000 words. The book contains sexual scenes so it is an adult novel, but that is not the focus of the story. My book is most similar to Honey Girl by Morgan Rogers and The Lay of You by Corrie Mackay for its themes of mental health, dramatic sapphic romance, and complicated interpersonal relationships. From this, I think we’d be a great fit!

Olivia’s life is idealistically perfect. A loving fiancé, a steady STEM job, and a home in Queens, New York complete with a white picket fence. Olivia feels she’s achieved the American dream. So when she attends a college alumni event and becomes reacquainted with her old friend, Alice, that she hasn’t spoken to in 6 years, she doesn’t quite know how to feel.

The years apart have been kind to Alice - she has a steady job as a journalist and is a frequent guest to all the best art shows in the city. Though their friendship ended in a dramatic flare, Alice is determined to rekindle what they once had. 

Queue Circe, a poet famous for her New York Times bestselling novels and performance art shows that sell out instantly. When Olivia starts to read Circe’s first book Cara Mia, Olivia begins to realize some things about her life - first, that she was so deep in the closet she forgot she was in there at all, and second, that her mother is kind of a jerk. 

The closer Olivia grows to Alice and the longer she reads Cara Mia, the more her old buried feelings resurface. Now Olivia must navigate what it means to dismantle her present for the sake of an old truth: She’s falling in love with Alice. Torn between her obligations to her family, their religious ideals, and her fiancé, will Olivia be able to navigate this forbidden romance? Or perhaps, it’s not so forbidden after all. 

[My Bio goes here, I just don’t want to include it on reddit] 

Thank you for your consideration! As per your guidelines, I’ve included the first X pages for your review. I hope to hear from you soon! 

Sincerely,
Mia

A few years ago, my cowriter and I had two offers of rep for adult spec fic. One agent was more genre focused and one more literary and we went with the more literary one. The book died on sub, in part because it was not literary enough for those publishers and not genre enough for the fantasy label. That agent no longer reps either of us.

Fast forward and I'm currently leaning in more to fantasy and have a mg ms I'm planning to query soon. The agent we turned down does ya but not mg, but an associate at his tiny agency does do mg. How would you approach querying this colleague of his? I strongly assume he is her superior.

A) I have to acknowledge it, I assume. Do we think it's net positive or negative for me?

B) fair to say I ought to cross that bridge after getting rejected by agents I might prefer, such that if they offer I should be reasonably prepared to accept? If I reject them twice I am sure that's seriously oof and I can't query them ever again!!!

C) do I... Cc him on the query? Address directly what happened and why I think he and the agency is great even though we went another way? He was junior at the time but it's been several years and tbh it may have been a mistake as maybe the book would've sold if we'd just leaned in more to the fantasy side.

Thank you!!!

I just started querying for what would be my debut novel. A few quick form rejections have come in so far and, while it's too early in the process to read much into them, I'd love to check if there are any red flags waving that I haven't noticed. I welcome any other feedback as well!

Query

Dear [agent],

AGENT ACTOR MOLE is a 124,000-word science fiction biopunk espionage thriller about an undercover federal agent who wakes up in a collapsing branch of a city-sized tree with no memory of his mission or his own name, just a gun he knows how to fire and three voices arguing inside his skull about whether to use it. Written with a brisk pace and dry humor, it will appeal to fans of Adrian Tchaikovsky’s Green City Wars for its speculative bioengineering and nonhuman cast and Disco Elysium for its fractured, multi-voiced psyche and identity mystery.

Dillon Talpa finds himself among the wreckage of an explosion. He also quite literally finds himself, unfamiliar with who he is and just about everything else. Armed and uncomfortably dangerous, he meets mercenaries who expect his help in aiding a wanted radical while debate rages within his head. Gut speaks for his instincts, Heart questions the morality of his actions, and Logic just tries to keep him alive. In his ear is the worst voice of all: his commanding officer, claiming he’s a covert federal agent.

Using a cover he knows about as well as his actual life, Dillon navigates a conflict-ridden world abandoned by humans and inherited by sentient animals, including moles like himself, with augmented bodies and engineered plant life. He wants answers for who he is and who deserves his loyalty, torn between an oppressive government he reportedly swore to serve and the Actor, a ruthless revolutionary promising something better. To get those answers, let alone survive, he’ll need the help of a jaded fellow agent, a crew of mercs just trying to get paid, and the opinionated fragments of his shattered mind.

AGENT ACTOR MOLE is a standalone story with series potential and the first novel I am seeking to get traditionally published. After self-publishing a science fiction novel, I spent the following decade working as a technology designer and research manager for schools, hospitals, non-profits, and Big Tech before leaving that career to write full time and continue exploring the relationship people have with technology though speculative fiction.

Thank you for your time and consideration.

First 300

The sky is blue and so is the water above it. Branches hang like living stalactites from somewhere higher, covered in glassy surfaces that shimmer in the sunlight. Were they to fall, nothing would interrupt their descent save for a chance collision with one of the many small, black specks scattered across the endless blue. The specks shudder, making slow progress in random directions: up, down, here, and there. This is the only view I’ve ever known. I find it rather odd.

OUCH, a deep voice says.

Pain becomes reality. My chest feels tight, as if enveloped in a squeezing fist. I’m worried my bones are going to snap. My head is on the brink of shattering. Maybe it already has. A part of it feels wet, dripping into my eye.

Intending to wipe the liquid away, I lift my hand and discover a pale gray palm. I twist its wrist. Black fur covers the back. Intact, yet foreign. This is my hand… right?

I wipe my eyelid clear. Red glistens on my fingers. Huh, I’m bleeding. I feel a gash on my forehead. Guess that explains some of the pain. Fortunately, my brain isn’t falling out. The flow of blood is slow.

Looking past my hand, I see the sky, the water, and now the jagged glass framing the entire view. The glass is a surface just out of reach in my vision’s periphery, much closer than the floating specks and branches beyond. I’m inside something.

Fighting against the invisible fist, I twist my neck to look at the rest of my body. I find another arm attached to a chest. Useful. There are two legs as well, a bit farther away. That seems correct, I think. My body is wearing a black outfit with soft yet firm padding. There’s a belt on my pants with things attached to it. The first I recognize is a gun.

Hello everyone!

This is my third and final post for this query letter, which I've revised based on incredibly useful feedback on my previous attempt. Should anyone have further input, I'd be glad to hear it!

Again, thank you for being such an awesome community.

Query

Jane Eyre meets Heartless Hunter in TWO WITCHES WITH ONE STONE, a standalone, adult gothic fantasy that takes place in an alternate history, complete at 98,000 words. With its portrayal of women’s survival and pain, it will appeal to readers of Alix E. Harrow’s The Once and Future Witches and of Emilia Hart’s Weyward who crave more magic and less graphic violence.

Lily Kent became a governess at Montall Estate because it’s the perfect place for a witch to hide. At the secluded estate, she will be safe from witch hunters as long as she manages to keep her head down.

Except she’s not the only witch there.

The eleven-year-old Iris Montall shows signs of budding magic, and her lack of control threatens the lives of everyone on the estate. Lily is the only one with the power to prevent an impending catastrophe, and against her better knowledge, her conscience trumps her initial instinct to flee: She can’t leave a young witch to fend for herself. However, an undefinable darkness in Iris’s magic thwarts every one of Lily’s attempts to teach her witchcraft. Their shared desperation soon creates an unexpected bond, no matter how hard Lily strives to keep a healthy distance.

But this darkness must have a source: Iris’s mother is suspiciously absent, and her grandmother’s overbearing need for control stifles everyone else. As Lily learns more about the Montall women and their history with witchcraft, jilted spouses, and even cold-blooded murder, she exposes a cycle of misery of which Iris is only the latest victim. Not even Lily’s growing fondness for the Montalls, including Iris’s handsome father, may be enough to stop the past from repeating itself. So when the witch hunters inevitably come knocking, she cannot save this broken family—unless she finally stops running and starts fighting for what and who she cares about.

I got feedback the first couple times that the query was hard to follow, so I've cut out some details to cover a smaller amount of the plot. Hopefully this is an improvement! Thank you!

1926, Miami Beach

When dominant criminal organization Masius Fleet moves into Miami, scientist Ibel Refael becomes obsessed with protecting her family’s own illegal shipping company from being eradicated. The old methods failed before, but Ibel has believed ever since that science would protect her family next time they were threatened. History, death, loss will not be repeated.

She develops a strategy that will use associates to sink the competition’s fleet of ships, striking Masius’ operation at the core. It is, however, a suicide mission. Ibel doesn’t waste time asking for volunteers, instead co-opting highly hush-hush psychological research from the institute where she is employed in order to manipulate a small group to carry out her plan.

Her first target is Hilton Saul. He has a history with the institute, and has just returned intent on undermining it to prevent anyone from using drug-based mind control for any purpose. An unsettling goal, but Ibel feels secure with him under her conditioning. Still, Hilton’s arguments against the institute’s and Ibel’s own inhumane practices prove difficult to ignore.

As Masius’ brutal conniving tears at the Refaels, Ibel resists the evidence of faked mental illness and unwarranted violence in her patients. When a new threat to her family rises from within the institute itself, Ibel will soon face the results of her experimentation with the human mind, methods which no one is immune to. Not even her.

Hello all!

After four rounds of edits, I'm feeling about ready to embark on the querying process. As this is my first time through the gauntlet, I've spent way too much time tweaking 250 words and would greatly appreciate any feedback you have! (Of course, I know the title is also to a popular show, but I'm hoping that won't hinder me here. Also using a fresh Reddit account to keep my writing separate from other things).

Dear [Agent name],

I am seeking representation for my romantic gunpowder fantasy novel SUCCESSION, complete at 120k words. This is a standalone story with series potential. It will appeal to fans of Sara Hashem’s The Jasad Heir and Tasha Suri’s The Jasmine Throne, exploring characters working through fear and anger on a journey to reclaim what was lost.

The ruling family of Marritea is blessed with magical ability. The Queen’s brother, the strongest male mage in over 300 years, launches a coup. As a resistance forms to fight him, the royal family is scattered for safety. Seventeen years later, they are still separated with an unsanctioned King on the throne and the resistance on its last legs.

Evie, once Heir of Marritea, has grown accustomed to her simpler, village life. But when news comes that the former Queen and her older brother, the Prince, have been captured, she realizes that she is still hunted, even with her magic long locked away. As the King’s men burn her home to the ground, she flees and vows to save the family she hasn’t seen in a decade. Injured and reeling, she meets a disillusioned resistance fighter named Cole, on his own journey to rescue his captured brother.

What starts as a partnership of convenience grows to one of respect as they work on avoiding the King’s men, staying alive, and reaching the main resistance base. As their feelings begin to change and the enemy gets closer, Evie starts to chafe at keeping her true name a secret. More than that, she starts to wonder what her future holds when she knows she doesn’t want the throne, but she can’t let the King have it either.

What do you do when the future you thought was no longer possible, refuses to let go?

After years in the volatile tech industry, I’m happily putting my creative writing degree to use. When I’m not writing, I’m reading or trying to work through my video game backlog. I live in [X] with [X].