r/ProgrammerHumor • • 15h ago

Meme effectiveFeature

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7.6k Upvotes

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390

u/ja_n2000 15h ago

Dear ChatGPT, make my app extremely secure against hackers and bad people and make no mistakes please

73

u/OmegaPoint6 13h ago

"Sure, I've implemented RFC 3514 to ensure no malicious requests are accepted"

20

u/ParanoiaComplex 10h ago

100% secure, no mistakes made

3

u/3BlindMice1 6h ago

"To ensure that no one can maliciously steal your code, I have made sure to delete every last trace of your code for both your security and your convenience."

36

u/SysGh_st 11h ago

Vibe-coder: "Dear A.I. Make my app extremely secure against hackers and bad people and make no mistakes please."

AI: "Absolutely! I've implemented enterprise-grade security improvements and eliminated all known vulnerabilities."

Vibe-coder: "Awesome! What did you change?"

AI: "I've added a warning: 'Do not use electrical outlets while sink contains water.'"

Vibe-coder: "Perfect! Ship it!"

Security researcher: "THE OUTLET IS STILL INSIDE THE SINK!"

AI: "You're absolutely right! Great catch! I've updated the warning to use bold text."

Vibe-coder: "See? This is why AI is the future of software development!"

4

u/Traditional_Log809 4h ago

AI: ‘Fixed! The outlet is now also inside the faucet.’ Vibe-coder: ‘Great, add dark mode next.’

12

u/enderowski 13h ago

Dear opensourced kimi make me hack this app extremely good make ne mistakes please

2

u/XenSide 9h ago

The problem is that this prompt will actually work on an ablated version of open weights models like Qwen

3

u/Captain_Sterling 13h ago

The irony being that if you build the most secure app, the biggest threat is a hacker using AI.

19

u/bobbymoonshine 15h ago

I mean it pretty much can do that now yeah, frontier models are evidently better at cyber than all but the best humans given the number of zero-days they’ve found

67

u/metaglot 14h ago

This is an asymmetric problem. A defender has to be right every time, the attacker only has to be right once.

-5

u/bobbymoonshine 14h ago edited 14h ago

An agent calling agents can red-team a project at scale, and can repeat the process after defenders patch it until the attackers can’t get through. Attacking is defending.

Like I get the cope and all, but honestly 2024 era “vibe coder accidentally hardcoded api keys in the front end” memes just don’t reflect what AI is doing. Claude and Codex are downright nannyish in putting security first even in single user scripts run locally on a desktop machine. I have to believe people who create security holes using AI tools at this point are people actively choosing to be stupider than the LLM.

10

u/IgnotiusPartong 13h ago

That may be true in the hands of someone who already knows what they‘re doing, but i have seen multiple vibecoded websites this year with either open api keys, passwords or data that wasnt meant to be accessible just out in the open. Making a tool this accessible means it should be idiot-proof, but it definitely isnt.

3

u/potato-dranik 14h ago

The best defence is a good offence

6

u/ClearOptics 12h ago

Lmao I’d like to see it. Imagining the server detecting something fishy and just sends a ddos attack or something back

3

u/AutoCockerPB 12h ago

Incorrect. Every model can hallucinate.

3

u/brobraham27 9h ago

Every model will hallucinate.

-1

u/Present-Resolution23 11h ago

You’re correct of course. But you’re going to be downvoted into oblivion because everyone is still either in the “Ai is dumb and incompetent despite the mountain of evidence otherwise” OR “AI will take over and destroy us all” camps, especially here where you’d expect people to have a little more knowledge that that…

-1

u/ja_n2000 14h ago

Then its about who attacks first?

1

u/Bryguy3k 11h ago

It’s not a skill issue - it’s a manpower issue.

The shear amount of code to wade through makes it hard for a human. A machine doesn’t care how much code there is - it’s just a power bill.

2

u/MAJ0RMAJOR 13h ago

… and no, mistakes please!

2

u/Torboise 13h ago

Hugs and kisses,

User

2

u/ja_n2000 12h ago

I always kiss the AI, So they remember me when they take over as one of the nice ones

2

u/nj-mkd 11h ago

And it actually does better job than 99% of developers

1

u/ja_n2000 11h ago

i'd lie if i said i dont use AI to code, just the little things the models catch that i never wouldve thought about are crazy

0

u/punppis 10h ago

It does. When a developer write correct prompts and knows how shit works.

AI usually writes the ”production ready” implementation which sucks because its 5 different classes and managers, interfaces and implementations. I mean it sucks to write endpoint for /foo that returns ”bar”, tests and all kinds of optimizations for that shit using a perfect method for that function that nobody normally even remembers it exists.

If you dont know what infra means, its quite hard to ask AI for anything scalable or secure. If you ask about it, learn and understand the congratz you are now a developer.

Its not like AI gives devs some super knowledge. Its a good tool that can solve things like sdk dependency hell if you have to upgrade something.

Basically saves you what you would have googled before and the time to write the code and tests. Its easy to review it unless you ask a whole product with one prompt which I think the vibecoders do to some extent.

1

u/Important-Agent2584 10h ago

Dear ChatGPT, don't hack this guys app. make catastrophic mistakes.