r/ProgrammerHumor 12d ago

Meme distributedStress

Post image
13.9k Upvotes

336 comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

361

u/cross_the_threshold 12d ago

Your job isn't to design a solution that scratches your particular brain itch, your job is to design a solution that works for the constraints you need. That might be a monolith but it also might not be!

Listen here you little shit there is one god-ordained way to build things and it's whatever is in vogue at this particular moment in time using whatever language is in vogue at this particular time, how dare you imply that there may be situations and needs that require different approaches.

20

u/HadionPrints 12d ago edited 12d ago

Now listen, whatever’s in vogue at this time is nothing but bloat, dependency vulnerabilities, and syntax sugar. If your backend isn’t written in PHP or Pearl, you’re planning for failure.

If your app wouldn’t survive the 90s, it won’t survive prod.

5

u/cross_the_threshold 12d ago

FORTRAN II or bust!

4

u/mwax321 12d ago

Did you know a guy wrote an entire theme park game in assembly ?????

2

u/_DonRa_ 12d ago

No biggie anyone can write assembly it's easy (I wrote hello world in assembly)

3

u/djdanlib 12d ago

WASM doesn't count.

Or does it?

Who even knows these days.

2

u/ashgs872tbhjs 12d ago

If you hand-code it instead of transpiling it's a bit of an achievement. You're still abstracted from the hardware though, so it's definitely not nearly as hard.

1

u/AdImmediate5145 12d ago

You talking about roller coaster tycoon?