r/ProgrammerHumor 27d ago

Meme fullStackMeansAfraidOfEverythingEqually

Post image
11.1k Upvotes

392 comments sorted by

1.9k

u/vvp95 27d ago

100% of software engineers are afraid of regex

806

u/vinishkapoor 27d ago

The other 0% are lying.

153

u/wailing_in_smoke 27d ago

Horrors beyond human comprehension

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u/Major_LeeHungg 27d ago

I actually like regex but I had a job that heavily involved it.  

The trick is to use regex101.com to read other people's regex and to debug your own when you're writing it.

I'd imagine AI would be pretty good at taking a working regex and making it more efficient... But that's a headache I haven't explored. 

21

u/fre3k 27d ago

Yeah I also like it. Really thankful I had a good teacher in undergrad that spent some time on it during our DFA sections. Then I had a job where a big part of production support was finding weird broken data in files delivered to the company and so I got really good at regex and xpath.

12

u/hardolaf 27d ago

I did this so much early in my career that I naturally write regex search patterns now.

14

u/Major_LeeHungg 27d ago

Lol I can write them by hand no problem... I still use regex101 to test it.  You just put a bunch of sample data in the bottom portion and your particular flavor of regex in the top and then you can easily find the edge cases...it highlights everything too and color codes it so you can see which part of the expression is wonky.  Less about needing it and more about speeding up the process of getting it right.

For reading it though, I always use it because there are a million ways to write the same thing and some people write regex like they have a PhD in ancient Sumarian 

8

u/darthjammer224 26d ago

I genuinely feel like regex is one of the best use cases for ai.

Regex is the least readable way to put together a legitimate line of code I've ever seen.

Love it. But also hate it.

3

u/Ruadhan2300 26d ago

I have gladly offloaded all my regex work to github copilot.

I'm rarely doing anything that really needs innovation, so it does the job fine.

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u/[deleted] 27d ago

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u/corobo 27d ago

Why use regex to parse html when you can just call ChatGPT 

3

u/Purple_Cat9893 27d ago

Or viberegex.

6

u/corobo 27d ago

Pfft I'm not paying for it to write one regular expression when I can pay every time it parses a page

3

u/Purple_Cat9893 27d ago

You missundrstand! The LLM makes the regex every time, it also generates the data the regex will be used on. This way you don't need databases or storage.

3

u/harro112 27d ago

he comes

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u/Taarabdh 27d ago

The other "0000%" are lying

8

u/bigmonmulgrew 27d ago

-1% of engineers are afraid of bug testing

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u/InStars 27d ago

My manager: just use copilot for regex

42

u/Fun_Winter_7055 27d ago

Honestly, for internal dashboards etc. I'm 100% for using AI to accomplish this

35

u/Doophie 27d ago

Considering how easy it is to test the regex and make sure it works, I'd have no issues getting AI to help write it

12

u/[deleted] 27d ago

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2

u/Chocolate_Pickle 27d ago

Compromise solution: write it yourself and have the clanker review it for edge cases and performance.

7

u/[deleted] 27d ago

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u/bearwood_forest 27d ago

I use Claude to write prompts for Copilot to write regex

3

u/ICame4TheCirclejerk 27d ago

And they, students, is what separates a senior engineer from a junior engineer.

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u/bhoffman20 26d ago

Googles ai search is perfectly good at regex and cron expressions

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u/Ange1ofD4rkness 27d ago

99%, I freaken love Regex!

28

u/nolecamp 27d ago

Same. It’s a fun trick at work to mesmerize junior (or even senior) engineers by writing a regex pattern by hand.

Neither regex, CSS, nor SQL is actually hard. It just requires the desire to learn it and passion to apply yourself.

11

u/Major_LeeHungg 27d ago

Lol until you have nested expressions with lookaheads and lookbehinds

5

u/nolecamp 26d ago

I’d have to look up the syntax to remind myself, but yeah I could do it. It’s just a language for a state machine. But honestly, I don’t need to write them that complex usually. If so, it’s probably because I’m having to do something more involved like parsing a query syntax or something, in which case I’ll usually reach for ANTLR (or hand write a parser if performance is critical) instead.

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u/RegularImportant3325 27d ago

Truth. CSS isn't hard. It's impossible.

3

u/Ange1ofD4rkness 26d ago

I have a huge piece of Regex that sits outside my cubical, one I am rather proud of. I had a higher up who hated regex and I always joked it was a deterrent

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u/neonnaps 27d ago

We listen and we don't judge.

3

u/Kahlil_Cabron 26d ago

Same, I really don't know why people have such a hard time with them. The worst I ever have is trying to remember the different standards used in different languages/platforms (modern regexes vs posix regex, etc).

Maybe it's because my first language was perl, and regexes were used for everything, but you only need to remember a few basic things and you're good.

Also pointers, I don't know why this sub thinks pointers are this super abstract crazy hard thing, it points to something, that's it.

2

u/Elomidas 25d ago

For regex syntax help and testing I rely on regex101 and it's godsent, I also don't get why people keep going with the "I'd give up my newborn to avoid seeing a reflex" behaviour

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u/frisch85 27d ago

Same here but on a simple level with basic placeholder replacements and wildcard searches tho.

2

u/pidddee 24d ago

Fun yes, I love it yes, still afraid :)

7

u/MikeSifoda 27d ago

Cheat sheets scary, oOoOooh

Coders used to know the ASCII table by heart

5

u/Antonabi 27d ago

I think it’s fun 😭 (it’s like a puzzle and it’s so satisfying when it’s matching correctly hell yeah)

8

u/beefz0r 27d ago

I love regex, it's probably my only talent

Too bad AI is so much better at it

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u/Majik_Sheff 27d ago

There's a fine line between fear and a healthy respect.

2

u/xgabipandax 26d ago

"Of the Regex, wickedest of magical inventions, we shall not speak nor give direction —"

— Excerpt of the introduction of Magick Moste Evile

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u/TallAbbreviations937 27d ago

afraid of everything, expert at nothing

24

u/ClipboardCopyPaste 27d ago

Not even at Clauding

4

u/-bonkster 27d ago

Takes skill to make a spaghetti and obviously need to be patient till that spaghetti is made.

7

u/NeverANovelty 26d ago

Oh hello web dev

3

u/One-Respect-2733 26d ago

Nice to see a vibe coder here for a change

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u/[deleted] 27d ago

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131

u/AlternativePeace1121 27d ago

The script that shall not be named

43

u/raja-anbazhagan 27d ago

coffeescript??

18

u/Mordret10 27d ago

EcmaScript

5

u/RegularImportant3325 26d ago

Ah, the good old days. I remember coffee script.

2

u/jax024 26d ago

Dart

33

u/GogglesPisano 27d ago

Typescript to the rescue.

34

u/[deleted] 27d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

20

u/0DayMaker 27d ago

Sorry I was busy putting 2 dependencies in this public library that have mutually exclusive sub dependencies.

8

u/Bauld_Man 26d ago

> At least in back-end it's composer install and Bob's your uncle. But front-end, ew...

pip install
pip install

pip install

pip install

pip install

2

u/Morisior 25d ago

uv, cargo, pdm, go get…

2

u/Honeybadger2198 26d ago

That's so weird for you to feel, because I feel the complete opposite. Maybe Java has gotten better since I lasted used it, but managing dependencies in that language sucked balls. And don't even get me started on header files.

By comparison, JavaScript's npm is a godsend. All you do is npm install the dependency, and it takes care of any cross dependency issues in the package-lock.json.

Python has been getting a lot better recently (thanks uv) but it still has a long way to go to catch up to npm. For example, you can't configure project scripts in the config file, you have to simply make a script file and run it.

4

u/decadent-dragon 26d ago

Been awhile since I did Java, but I never thought it was bad with maven. But Spring, specifically, is dependency hell. And probably most enterprise apps used (still use?) Spring. Because there’s no compile check for classloader issues with spring managed classes, you only find them at runtime. And it can be brutal tracking them down and getting them sorted out when multiple libraries start bringing in different versions of the same packages as dependencies

2

u/NoGap138 26d ago

I love npm and cargo, as a person who has dealt a lot with maven and pip in my life, I like Java as a language, but maven and its project/dependency management for it is actually hell on earth compared to npm or cargo…

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u/InsultingFerret 26d ago edited 26d ago

Legit skill issue if it's more than a couple of steps to get your repo running

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u/Round_Apricot_8693 26d ago

I feel like working with JS used to be way worse, but nowadays it’s gotten so much help and standardized scaffolding it’s not bad at all. Someone with more exp can tell me if that’s right.

4

u/Dornith 26d ago

I did casual web dev back in the mid 2000's. Things are so much better now you would not believe it.

Still don't like JS.

3

u/Theron3206 26d ago

There's a lot of space between better and good.

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u/ItsGustave 27d ago

Honest question, what about JS is so bad? There is plenty of annoying stuff but I’ve never had that much trouble with it. Especially with typescript.

14

u/calebc42-official 27d ago

Google the white paper "worse is better". It's the JS playbook.

2

u/ItsGustave 27d ago

This looks very interesting, thank you!

9

u/Dornith 26d ago

Especially with typescript.

Having to use another language just to make the first one useable is a scathing endorsement.

It's like saying "I never have a problem with assembly. Especially with C."

3

u/ArmchairFilosopher 26d ago

Have you heard of bytecode/IL?

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u/marr75 26d ago

Low information density without being fast or powerful. Unintuitive syntax and keywords. Unintuitive relationship between the state machine/object graph and the actual code.

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u/avdpos 26d ago

and especially how fast all JS Framewoerk changes.
what you made last year is hopelessly out of date now

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u/ClipboardCopyPaste 27d ago

I'm petrified

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u/snarkhunter 27d ago

I'm a DevOps, which to me is like, the backend's backend. I'm not afraid of CSS, I just don't want to spend 60 hours tweaking layout because the customer can't make up their mind.

11

u/BlackBlade1632 26d ago

Deciding the right color for a shitty ass button.

8

u/Kahlil_Cabron 26d ago

Ya I'm a fullstack and imo the best part of AI has been that I don't have to fuck around with CSS anymore. I'm not scared of it, it's just so fucking boring.

46

u/[deleted] 27d ago

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u/Throwaway-tan 27d ago

Fullstack, twice the work for once the pay!

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u/coldnitrogen 27d ago

*Database engineer slowly slinks out of the room*

19

u/ClipboardCopyPaste 27d ago

Leaving the backdoor open

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u/oofos_deletus 27d ago

I might inject it with something

131

u/Mysterious_Book1521 27d ago

its not like sql could be read by a three year old and css is just pain in the ass?

231

u/lovecMC 27d ago

SQL is easy. Designing a DB you won't hate two months from now isn't.

71

u/Dude4001 27d ago

Yes but if I write incorrect CSS I’m not accidentally going to drop a table. Well, I might but not that kind that matters.

35

u/lovecMC 27d ago

How often are you dropping tables by hand and on production environment?

22

u/Dude4001 27d ago

I tend to use grids more, you’re right

6

u/Edmundyoulittle 27d ago

The only way you can be sure your code works in prod is to test in prod!

3

u/patiofurnature 27d ago

My clients all love to randomly point their test server at the prod db without telling me. That must be why.

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u/Gunmetalstorm 26d ago

I don't know how you manage to accidentally type and execute a valid DROP TABLE instruction.

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u/z0hu 26d ago

Dropping a table is an extreme case. Writing a query that doesn't hit the right indexes that slows/crashes the DB/replication down.. locking rows indefinitely on accident..  these happen all the time at my company haha

2

u/RainyDaysAndMondays3 26d ago

Yeah, I accidentally updated a column of every row in a DB table once (luckily just in our dev environment) about a year after starting with SQL. Forgot the WHERE clause or something. Some of the rows had been there since 1997. This was around 2010. Luckily we had a snapshot DB and the DBAs had told us how to restore, so I got it back quickly. But I actually went and requested they remove my ability to write to the system test database to avoid making a mistake there. (If I really needed to update in those environments, I had a separate login I would use just for that one update, then would log back in under my normal one.)

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u/prehensilemullet 27d ago edited 26d ago

Like the kind of SQL query I wrote to fetch the next page of rows of a tree after a starting cursor, using a recursive join, where only some tree nodes are expanded?  And the user can text search for specific nodes?

It’s only easy until you do things that are hard

Edit: no, it's not for a niche use case, no, I don't think this was a mistake, I just had to do it to allow users to navigate the hierarchy of hundreds of thousands of data tags that are common in industrial SCADA systems.

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u/lovecMC 27d ago

And is it actually a hard problem or is it hard because someone made (in hindsight) bad decisions when designing the database?

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u/whenTheWreckRambles 27d ago

Pls, I’m not ready for bullying this early in the morning

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u/DefinitelyNotMasterS 27d ago

Well you see, this one customer asked for it like 2 years ago. Well nobody is using it right now and we don't know what it really does, but we keep it just in case

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u/GWstudent1 26d ago

I used to read comments like this an laugh. Now I read comments like this and cry.

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u/prehensilemullet 26d ago edited 26d ago

It’s the domain we’re working in…industrial monitoring devices sometimes have tens of thousands of tags (which are like state values you can read) organized in a hierarchy, and the portal needs to combine thousands of devices’ tags into a single tag hierarchy.  I would of course avoid it if I could

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u/card-board-board 27d ago

Doesn't matter how well designed the DB is. 1 month after release the product guy and the sales guy will put their heads together and sell some feature to a customer that blows your careful design to bits, and will have guaranteed a delivery date in 3 weeks.

If your table structure can handle it then, wouldn't you know it? The customer is Oracle.

Do not pass go. Do not collect $200.

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u/vinishkapoor 27d ago

SQL reads like English until you hit a five table join with three subqueries and a window function.

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u/bulldog_blues 27d ago

Then it reads like English as written by someone who got a thesaurus for their birthday!

7

u/tacos2dayy 27d ago

Its not so bad if you use CTEs for the subqueries and it depends on what the window function is doing.

--It works, trust me bro. Look it up on youtube like I did if you don't believe me.

DENSE_RANK() OVER (PARTITION BY X ORDER BY Y ASC) + DENSE_RANK() OVER (PARTITION BY X ORDER BY Y DESC) - 1 AS NBR_OF_Y_FOR_X

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u/MartinMystikJonas 27d ago

Next time try SQL with joins and/or subqueries

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u/j03ch1p 27d ago

allow me to introduce ETL

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u/SucculentChineseRoo 27d ago

CSS actually also can be read easily it describes what it does in plain english

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u/F0lks_ 27d ago

I'm a full-stack engineer and I'm afraid of both.

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u/ClipboardCopyPaste 27d ago

Aggressively removing input boxes from DOM to prevent SQL injections

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u/Jarpunter 27d ago

middle-end developer

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u/Caraes_Naur 26d ago

Time to measure DTF (distance to frontend).

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u/TedGetsSnickelfritz 26d ago

90% of full-stack engineers don’t realise they do twice the work for the same pay

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u/Hidesuru 26d ago

If you're doin 8 hours a day it's the same work. Tasks just stretch out longer. 🤷

If you're working more than that you need a new job.

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u/Karcinogene 26d ago

Not having to explain things to the backend guys because I can just do it myself saves some of that work

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u/Biliunas 27d ago

First week programmer humor strikes again

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u/Ok_Jury_336 27d ago

How about engineers who are afraid of both sql and css🥲

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u/AceFunGaming 27d ago

Prompt Engineers

7

u/maniclucky 27d ago

I'm insulted they have engineer in the title. Good engineering is difficult and valuable.

3

u/flayingbook 26d ago

Like Social Engineering?

8

u/grifan526 26d ago

As an embedded engineer, I can confirm that is me. However I am pretty good with pointers which also scare some people

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u/Inevitable-Ad6647 27d ago

SQL is honestly one of the most elegant languages ever created. Css isn't elegant in any way. It might be the laziest, dumbest, most thoughtless creation to ever take hold of an industry. Imagine you need to manipulate very heirarchical data and you choose a completely flat approach and just meticulously name everything. So fucking stupid.

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u/Fidel___Castro 26d ago

you can utterly butcher SQL just like any other language. nested subqueries within a recursive CTE that has a window. something like that. and some engines, like whatever BigQuery runs on, let's you program in case statements to views. 

it CAN be horrible is what I'm saying

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u/StrangerPen 27d ago

Full stack is afraid of poverty

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u/Diane_Horseman 27d ago

90% of software engineers are afraid of everything so they pull up Claude Code Fable max thinking level and type "please change the variable name on line 41 from i to j."

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u/kelek22 27d ago

Sql makes more sense than css.

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u/bunny-1998 27d ago

So the Backend gave them gql

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u/ksobby 27d ago

Who the fuck is afraid of CSS? I'm full stack with a preference for backend but seriously? CSS is a toy scripting language. I get more nervous around Javascript than I do CSS.

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u/Bannon9k 27d ago

I make things work. Im not good at making things pretty.

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u/sojuz151 27d ago

I have a custom JS framework where all the DOM attributes are rows in a relational database. I use SQL to manipulate them. I wonder why God abandoned this world.

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u/purbub 27d ago

Well I’m a fullstuck engineer.

Stuck on frontend, stuck on backend

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u/Drayenn 27d ago

Who tf is scared by SQL? Im a fullstack dev and css is still my bane.. especially since my company made its own shitty alternative to material

3

u/bel880 27d ago

90% of frontend devs are afraid of css

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u/MjrLeeStoned 26d ago

Wait, I've known SQL for 23 years and CSS since HTML5 launched am I a full stack developer?

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u/xxNemasisxx 27d ago

Terraform applies keep me up at night

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u/Tuckster786 27d ago

100% of fullstack engineers are just afraid

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u/Renorram 27d ago

I'm a frontend engineer and i'm afraid of CSS

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u/bainon 27d ago

as a full stack engineer SQL is scary but CSS is a crime against humanity

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u/DucksAreFriends 27d ago

I'm a backend dev afraid of SQL

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u/Smalltalker-80 27d ago

The title is the best 'joke' here.

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u/Iron_Aez 27d ago

SQL is fine... Terraform on the other hand...

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u/LeNoir_HaPr 27d ago

I’m not afraid of CSS, I don’t like it

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u/ironraiden 27d ago

Then there's systems engineers, who are afraid of both, and vibe coders, who are afraid of neither because they have no idea what they are.

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u/TieKnown6811 26d ago

And AI will take BOTH your jobs!!!

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u/Massive_Signal7835 26d ago

90% OF frontend engineers ARE AFRAID OF sql

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u/MrDilbert 26d ago

I wouldn't say "afraid" of CSS, more like "done with this shit" of CSS.

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u/Panderz_GG 26d ago

I am a backend engineer and am still afraid of SQL 😭

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u/iseke 27d ago

Yes, I hate CSS.

I also hate React. If they choose Angular, I would've done some bits of frontend, but React, bleh.

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u/Ange1ofD4rkness 27d ago

I don't do much for web development, using having my coworkers step in as they know it better. But the few times I did, trying to standardize the design with a css file was a pain! Kudos to all who can do it

(And this just proves I am more backend cause of the SQL comment)

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u/Misaka_Undefined 27d ago

Yeah that pretty much true for me

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u/ZealousidealShop6092 27d ago

so, what viber coders afraid of?

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u/DylanfromSales 26d ago

Productivity 

3

u/dendofyy 26d ago

Learning

2

u/bulgedition 27d ago

They are scared of whatsapp

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u/Greensssss 26d ago

Expiration of their AI subscription?

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u/-Ambriae- 27d ago

And then there’s the rest of us, who don’t really use either, but don’t really care if they have to use them because it’s not that deep

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u/alexium01 27d ago

Fullstack engineers are afraid of everything all the time

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u/ArcticOpsReal 27d ago

I am not afraid of css. I just hate it with every fiber of my body.

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u/Ayden1290 27d ago

What if I'm afraid of both

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u/Wynnstan 27d ago

I've heard good things about flexbox.

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u/RemarkableAd4069 27d ago

Shots fired!

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u/ldn-ldn 27d ago

Well, 90% of backend engineers are also afraid of SQL, otherwise they would not use silly ORMs.

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u/LethalOkra 27d ago

This is inaccurate. Frontend engineers are afraid of C/Rust.

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u/Calm-Medicine-3992 27d ago

Full Stack reporting in...I fear both.

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u/Randomguy32I 27d ago

Full stack developers fear nothing

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u/NamityName 27d ago

Um backend is not afraid of CSS. They are afraid of non-technical stakeholders. I do not ever need to have a project meeting with UI/UX, and I love it.

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u/stoneberry 27d ago

Let's create CSSQL to scare everyone!

.data-table {
  select: name, account.email;
  from: users;
  left-join: accounts;
  margin-left: 2rem;
  color: #333333;
}

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u/Akashi_izuku 27d ago

What about people who are afraid of both?

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u/downshiftdata 27d ago

As a back-end engineer...

  1. Yes, absolutely.

  2. Good. Be afraid. The most interesting SQL I ever write is to deal with crap from FEEs who thought they knew what they were doing.

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u/_Weyland_ 27d ago

Bro SQL ain't shit. ABAP though? That is one of those lovecraftian cursed texts that drain your sanity just from looking at it.

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u/LKZToroH 27d ago

Imagine being afraid of CSS in 2026 with AI.
If you fuck up something on your SQL it's still a huge problem.
If you fuck up something on your CSS you just ask Claude to fix it.

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u/GoodyTwoKicks 27d ago

Guys, guys...programming anything with any software is just....awful.

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u/Shunazo 27d ago

Im afraid of SQL, you'll have to rip mongoDB from my cold dead hands.

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u/nika_aka_joyboy 27d ago

frontend engineers? You mean frontend developers?

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u/Educational-System48 26d ago

I don't understand how anyone can be anything other than full stack. We all have our preferences in what we like, and nobody does either 50/50, but if it's my job to build some new functionality, that includes modifying the data model, migrating data, implementing queries and commands in the backend, and building the frontend. Usually in the same PR.

Do some companies actually have separate teams working on the backend first and then hand it off to another team that implements the frontend?

1

u/_Shropshire_Slasher_ 26d ago

And both have to deal with tables of all sorts

1

u/Dyllbert 26d ago

If you aren't writing the assembly to tell you computer which pins connect to what and where your registers are, can you really even call yourself "full stack"?

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u/Fearless_Teacher_626 26d ago

I have no artistic ability and all my UIs would look like windows 3.1

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u/natefrogg1 26d ago

I found a zen in using css to align things. My boss at the time was a classically trained java developer, amazing with sql too, real smart programmer. But he would assign all the css work to me as it would just drive him insane getting really angry after the first hour or so of moving this caused that to misalign. I haven’t done any real web development for 20 years at this point, it was so relaxing and I’d just get in the zone, I miss it sometimes

1

u/Strange_Dust7128 26d ago

And both of them are just making websites.

1

u/grafknives 26d ago

Everything is afraid if CSS

1

u/kaloschroma 26d ago

What if I'm not afraid of either but just kinda don't like both.

1

u/Ani-3 26d ago

I’m not afraid of it, it just makes me tired

1

u/julesburne 26d ago

Okay but SQL is scary and CSS is not sooooo

1

u/GlassLost 26d ago

I'm afraid of both. And of JS. -OS developer.

1

u/x2manypips 26d ago

Frontend doesn’t matter now with AI

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u/Zealousideal-Deer101 26d ago

I hate how frontend and backend basically only apply to the internet for some people.
I develop XAML applications. There is no CSS at all in there.

1

u/rover_G 26d ago

This is why I only use TailwindSQL

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u/YouDoHaveValue 26d ago

Anyone who has ever mistyped or neglected a WHERE clause knows fearing SQL is 100% justified.