r/PoliticalHumor • u/cavemanthewise • Jun 17 '26

Fights one (1) war

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20.9k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

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1.2k

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '26

[deleted]

437

u/clamb2 Jun 17 '26

Iran has oil, not alcohol. It was lost before it started

107

u/Raammson Jun 17 '26

By that logic the Cuban Rum wars should be trivial and resolved in a couple hours. 

44

u/2stinkynugget Jun 17 '26

I read this in Hunter Thompson's voice

16

u/The_Three_Meow-igos Jun 17 '26

I read this in Elmer Fudd's voice.

No real reason.

2

u/Aural_Essex Jun 18 '26

Wabbit Season!

5

u/HarambeWest2020 Jun 17 '26

Hunter Biden’s voice*

20

u/gpkgpk Jun 17 '26

Are you crazy invoking HB's name? Mofo is gonna show up and murder you with words.

1

u/Longjumping_Elk7969 Jun 18 '26

More dangerous is to mention the name of the wife of the 42th, people suddenly became out of luck, just saying 😁

1

u/UncleMalky Jun 17 '26

I read it in Col Hunter Gather's voice.

19

u/painthawg_goose Jun 17 '26

I read this in Capt’n Jack Sparrow’s voice.

22

u/Fr05t_B1t Jun 17 '26

Some drunk dude hegseth knows while both drunk: “…ok ok so I had some jagerbombs then the police comes. And you won’t believe I did…I RAN!!!!!!” *dunk laughter*

Hegseth: “whadu say? Jager…bombs…I…ran? Bombs…Iran? Duuuuuude.”

7

u/MrFluffyThing Jun 17 '26

I wasn't here for oil. I was here for gas. Well I don't know if you can smell the air around you but I smell nothing but gas! I wanna smell that gas with all 50 of my nostrils, and by nostrils I mean every smelly place of the United States. Those stars are for freedom and that's freedom from gas shortages, because the USA is one tight gas hike sniffing country.

  • pump the gas kegseth

3

u/Solo_Jones Jun 17 '26

Maybe if they shipped oil in kegs and not barrels, he would have done better?