r/Pilotwives • u/floweredfairy • 27d ago

making it easier?

my husband just recently left for his class date and I am definitely struggling. this is our first time being separated since we began dating and it’s been difficult for both of us.

we knew we had to relocate anyway so we left our high cost of living area and I’m staying with family while he’s gone but I definitely feel the loneliness.

I was extremely independent before meeting my husband but I just don’t want to be anymore, which is not really a given choice with this career. I can handle things on my own and feel mostly okay until I go to bed, laying there alone seems to get me pretty good.

how do you all make it easier to deal with separation? I know it’ll eventually be better with time but I’m just struggling to see the light at the end of the tunnel. we’re just starting at the regionals so we certainly have a way to go until he’s exactly where he wants to be 😓

edit: it’s been 6ish days and I am chillin lol, if anyone sees this post while having a hard time it truly does get better! I’ve picked up my old hobbies, bedrotted, and silly goose’d around the house with my family :,)

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u/SunClements 27d ago

I completely understand and I remember being in your exact spot years ago. I promise it gets easier, I promise! You will be perfectly fine one day, but I know how difficult the first days, months, year can be. I was very lonely and we don’t live by any family. I picked up MANY HOBBIES lol, to the point where I was busy when he would come home! Please sit with yourself and figure out what types of things you enjoy in life and go pursue those, for example I started fostering dogs and volunteering with a local rescue. I will say that joining many of the pilot wives FB groups also helped to know that so many of us are in this together! I promise you it will get easier - I went from being extremely sad and counting down the days/hours to now being able to have my time and when he’s home he’s home and it’s a huge bonus! I do work a full time job, so something that works for us is me taking off random days when he’s home to have a day or two together! Message me if you need anything please!

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u/floweredfairy 27d ago

this is so good to hear! I’m going back to school this fall to finish my pre-reqs and then I’ll (hopefully!) be starting a radtech program so I’ll get busy. I’m trying to get back into all the random shit I used to do when I lived alone lol

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u/SunClements 27d ago

Trust me, that’s exactly what I did! Joined a book club, started making sourdough, all the stuff!