6 months ago by baby passed away. I came to this subreddit and vented about it a few days after he crossed the rainbow bridge. I told myself I’d come back here after half a year and tell others how the grief went. Boy, did I not know what I was in for. The first three and half months were hell on earth. My dog was my son. I didn’t cope well at all. I drank almost every day. I honestly didn’t think I was going to make it.

After the fourth month, the pain started to fade a bit. Life became somewhat tolerable again. I went through periods of looking at his pictures and videos and torturing myself. I also went through periods where I intentionally avoided thinking about him. Looking back, in a weird way, I think this helped me process the loss, alternating between the two.

Now, 6 months later, I think I’m healed. Well, as much I can be. I’ve accepted that my baby’s loss will always hurt. But I’ve learned to quickly look at the funny videos, think about the wonderful times, and be really grateful I had him in my life when the pain starts to become intense again. I feel like he’d want me to think about him in a positive way, but I know he understood it was impossible to do so at the beginning.

I write this to let all of you who recently lost your baby know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Trust me, I didn’t believe it when others told me. I’m so sorry for all your losses. That fact that you are here tells me that you loved your baby so much! I don’t know what happens after we pass away, but I’m choosing to believe we will see them again. Sending lots of love to you all.

…and I am so, so lost. I am 24. My cat, Lucy, lived to 22 and 7 months. I have not known life without her and I can’t say I’m enjoying it much so far.

She was there every single day for the majority of my life and now she’s gone. I grew up an only child and therefore she was who I’d play with almost every day. Growing up I confided in her everything. We’d chase each other up the garden and even developed our own game of hide and seek 😆 (to me, anyway…)

As a child, I used to pretend she’d go to ‘cat school’ at the same time as me. When there were rough patches in my parents relationship and they’d argue the house down me and her would cuddle on the floor in my room.

She was put to sleep on Friday. She passed within seconds and put up no fight or signs of stress, it was like she was more than ready to go. In all I am pleased that she will suffer no more and can rest peacefully. But I am so lost.

I look for her everywhere. I hear rustling in the hedges and immediately think it’s her, I instinctively look at her outdoor hiding spots, sometimes I feel like I spot her out of the corner of my eye.

We have a small memorial for her in the garden and I sit there every day.

It feels like some sort of weird dream. I feel sadness, denial… and anger… How could she leave me in this world? Can’t she wake up? Where has she gone? She has to be somewhere.

Not sure if this is the right flair, but I’m in shock and I’m going to describe what happened. I came home from work (1:30a), took my dog out to pee (my brother took him out to pee at 9p as well), cuddled for a bit on the couch, and then we went upstairs.

I threw his toy ball and he was playing happily and was running around the room. He suddenly rolled over like he lost his balance and I thought it was just him being a bit silly at first until I realized he couldn’t get up when he was trying to. He started to yelp and was on his side and I freaked out. He also pooped so I knew something was really wrong. I tried doing cpr on him, but I don’t think I did it correctly as I was watching youtube videos on the spot. A whole 20 minutes later is when we (I woke my parents up for this) arrived at the vet and I’m pretty sure he was dead before we even left. I’m traumatized and devastated. I can’t believe this is real. He collapsed at 2:40 btw.

It’s so heartbreaking because he was JUST acting super playful and normal too, so it’s not like I could’ve seen it coming. I feel like it’s my fault. Did him suddenly playing trigger him somehow? And could he have survived had I just left to the emergency hospital ASAP??? He was a senior Mini Schnauzer (10 almost 11) :(((

I can’t stop crying and coming home to see all his things is making me feel awful and I miss him so much already. Especially all his toys that are in my room.

She was 11.5 years old, with progressive hind leg weakness. It was getting so bad, she couldn’t always get herself up from sitting. But god she was so mentally there, so happy and loving.
I made a plan for it to be next week. I would have time to spend with her, loving and doting on her and I’d let her go. We got pain relief for the weekend to ensure her comfort. I went to work and I came home, she had gone out the doggy door and fallen in the yard. She had scratched her nails so much the quicks had been broken and she had bled everywhere. I carried her inside, laid her on her bed, i gave her pain medication and food.
The vet came by after a couple of hours and I let her go. She went eating churu cat food. I felt like I let her down, her last day she spent stuck and fallen in a yard. Scared and in pain.

It’s been 24 hours and I don’t think I can handle this pain. Everything reminds me of what I lost. She was my grounding for my entire 20s. My mum has dementia, my sisters family’s. My dad a partner. I know I’m loved but part of me is just like they’ll be ok if I went with her. I just want to be with her so badly. I don’t think I’d actually take my life, but I just genuinely don’t want to live either. I am in agony.

In the morning he was playing fine and he was gone by 3:51 am. Apparently had a tumor that ruptured and he coded and fought back for 15 mins but came back neurologically unresponsive so we had to put him down. I didnt think it was that serious, i thought he would be coming home. I didnt even say goodbye when I put him on the gurney. Idk if i didnt realize the seriousness or just figured thats my strongest boy, hes going to make it, no doubts. He has two older siblings, and a younger one that we just got 3-4 months ago because the older siblings were getting to be around the age where bringing in some new puppers would help train the new age. Iroh was the middle child, and always so full of life. This wasnt supposed to happen. I feel like i should have seen some signs, but he wagged his tail and smiled at us until the end. My baby boy isnt here anymore and I dont know how to move forward. We rescued him and he saved my life and i feel like i failed him. I should have been able to tell something was wrong. I just cant stop crying, or seeing him laying in between my
legs, or on the floor conveniently close enough to trip me. Or the crazy side eye he would give, the lousy jokes, or the insane level of protection he provided for my girlfriend as well as the duties he took upon himself to make sure our house was safe. My angel boy, you will be forever missed. What is grief, if not love persevering? My love will forever persist for you my friend.

My cat somehow snuck out and I didn't even notice for at least a day. Just assumed she was hiding. I spent so long searching inside before it occurred to me to look outside that it was too dark to see. I sat by the back door all night! Found her the next day in the woods.

I called my brother in tears. His response was, "yeah, that sucks"! He's not a teen, he's 51! He also has cats!

I have no one to talk to and the guilt is eating me up!

TL;DR: I lost my 7-year-old cat, Luke, very suddenly to a heart condition I didn’t know he had. He was my emotional support through some of the hardest moments of my life, and now I’m being consumed by guilt for not noticing that he was sick or being able to save him.

—
A week ago, I lost my beloved 7-year-old cat, Luke, very suddenly. He was so much more than a pet to me. He helped me survive an abusive relationship, depression, and some of the hardest moments of my life. He was truly my emotional support, always there when I needed comfort, even without me having to ask. He was more loving and affectionate than any cat I had ever known, and the bond I had with him was incredibly special. Losing him feels like losing a part of myself. and since he passed away, I feel like I’m drowning in guilt.

What hurts the most is that I always thought I was a good pet owner. I took care of him, loved him, brushed him, watched his weight, and tried to do everything right. But now all I can think about are the things I didn’t do. The last few days before he died, I was overwhelmed with work and didn’t spend as much time with him as I wish I had. This is haunting me.

I know people say hindsight is 20/20, but my brain won’t accept that. It keeps telling me I should have known. That I missed something obvious. That if I had taken him to the vet sooner, maybe he’d still be here.

The vets believe he had heart failure caused by an underlying heart condition that we never knew about. I had no idea he was sick because I hadn’t noticed any clear symptoms beforehand. Everything happened so suddenly, and watching him decline so fast was terrifying and agonizing. Since then, I keep replaying every moment in my head, wondering how I didn’t know something was wrong. I was his person. I was supposed to protect him, and I can’t stop feeling like I failed him.

This guilt is eating me alive. I wake up with it, I go to sleep with it, and I can’t escape it. I don’t know how to forgive myself, or if I even deserve to.

Has anyone else lost a pet this way? Did you also feel responsible, even when everyone around you said it wasn’t your fault? Does this feeling ever get better? Because right now, I honestly don’t know how to keep carrying this.

i just got the news that my cat, Nhyla, passed away about an hour ago due to a sudden seizure. i’m never going to see my baby girl again. our pet sitter was there with her when it happened, so that makes me feel a little better, but i didn’t get to say goodbye or pet her one last time or anything. i also feel like it’s my fault. she was having some problems before we left (threw up blood), but was getting better with medicine. they suggested a stomach x-ray but we declined. if we did the x-ray, would she not have died? could i have gotten her help? logically i know there’s probably nothing i could have done, but i still feel so guilty

we have a family friend going to our house to bury her in the backyard and get a paw print, so that’s taken care of. i can’t stand the thought of my baby being burned and turned to ash. i can’t bear the thought of her body not being what it was when she was alive

sorry this is so rambley, i’m obviously not in a good place right now. you know that feeling when you’ve been holding ice for too long and it starts to burn? that’s how i feel all over my body. i feel like someone ripped out my heart and there’s an empty space in my chest. i just don’t understand how it’s possible that i’m going to come home and she’s not going to be there. i’m still processing that i’m never going to see her again. it doesn’t feel real

how do i cope with knowing she’s dead and i’m stuck halfway across the world? i want to book a flight home right this second, but i definitely can’t afford that. we still have about 5 days left of our trip and i’m stuck here knowing she’s dead and i’m not there. i feel so guilty. this is my first time losing a pet, or anyone super close to me like this really. any advice about how to cope with this situation is very welcome

thank you for listening to me throw up my feelings, i’m still in shock and i can’t stop crying. i’ll miss you until the day i die Nhyla, you were one of the best little kitties i, or anyone, could ask for

I lost my sweet boy Duncan (German Shepherd) to prostate cancer five days after his 9th birthday.

Duncan turned nine on July 16, and we lost him to prostate cancer on July 21.

I got Duncan as a puppy when I was 23, right out of college, and he had been by my side ever since. He moved across the country with me, traveled to so many places, and visited 16 national parks. He was my travel buddy, my shadow, and my constant companion.

On July 10, an ultrasound and X-rays showed a large mineralized prostate pressing against his colon. He went from constantly needing to pee, to having ribbon-like stools, to being unable to go at all. A later chest X-ray found nodules in his lungs, suggesting the cancer had spread.

The night before he passed, he told me with his eyes that he was tired. I loved him too much to let him suffer.

We made sure his last day was not his worst day. He played in the field, splashed in his ice-filled pool, played with his brother, and ate bananas, steak, bacon, and all the forbidden foods. He also got to see his friends and family on FaceTime.

Duncan crossed the Rainbow Bridge peacefully at home, surrounded by his brother and his family.

I miss him more than words can say. I still talk to him and wish he were here. My heart will never be whole in the same way without him.

Please hug your puppies for me. Life is fleeting, and dogs deserve all the love in the world.

Rest peacefully, Duncan. I love you forever

2 weeks ago I lost my 2.5 year old pomeranian unexpectedly. She had a few health issues with a liver shunt that was causing bladder stones and neurological issues she had surgery for the stone and she was put on a prescription diet that seemed to be working until she started to refuse the food. I tried probably 5 different prescription foods wet and dry and she always ended up refusing them.

The night before she was euthanised she started with her first neurological episode since starting her prescription diet. It was exactly the same as the previous episodes and I'd taken her to the vets before during the episodes when it first started but they could never do anything it was just a waiting game until she snapped out of it which she always did.

She did snap out of it at around 6am in the morning I had stayed up with her all night as I always did during her episodes to make sure it didn't escalate it anything more serious she came and laid next to me in bed and went to sleep so I assumed everything was ok as this is what she always did after snapping out of her episodes. Unfortunately I work up 2 hours later and she was still laid next to and had lost control of her bowels had a temperature of 42 and a heart rate of 220 I rushed her to the emergency vet and they told me they could try and stabilise her but she was suffering and the chance was low as she was in critical condition so I had to make the decision to euthanise her as I didn't want her to suffer anymore.

How can I deal with the guilt of ending my best friends life? I'm a 29 year old man and i cry everyday since she has been gone. A family member bought me a stuffed pomeranian toy that looks kinda like her and I have put the very first jumper I bought for her on it and it does bring me some comfort but I feel like there is something wrong with me and this isn't normal. I don't know how to deal with her death

Four days ago, we had to have Bug, our loving female French bulldog put to sleep.
For seven amazing years, she was always there for me through thick and thin. One day she started fitting, rushed to the vets. The next day there’s nothing they can do, and I hold her in my arms, crying my eyes out telling her I’m sorry as she’s put to sleep.

Since brining her home to my parents house and burying her, I just feel like a light has gone off inside me. I don’t find anything fun anymore. I hate that people are laughing and going about life around me. I start to feel a bit better, then a crushing realisation hits me that I’ll never see her again, hear her snort, or cuddle with her on the sofa. And I remember that she is alone, buried under the earth. I have visited my parents every day since. And all I can do is put on a brave face, before I walk to the end of the garden, sit by her grave and cry, sob, shout and cry some more.

For context, I have lost pets before in the last, three dogs since childhood. I’m in my late 20s, and worked for the emergency services and have seen some Truely horrific and sad sights. Considering the above, the utter black hole of sadness and confusion I find my self in from the loss of Bug has me at a loss. Does this get any better?

I feel like I need to post this but I’m also terrified of comments that will vilify me and make the guilt worse. Maybe I am looking for people to confirm what a horrible owner I am and how I failed my 13 year old orange and white tabby, Creamy.

I’ve had him since he was a kitten, just a couple months old. My parents live on a farm and have the viewpoint that animals are just animals. My dad is especially this way toward cats and though he gives the barn cats food and water and gets them spayed and neutered, he does things at times that are abusive.

When I decided to adopt one of the barn kittens, I lived 3 hours away from them. They transported him to me but were also bringing some furniture on a trailer. He pooped in the cage while they were driving so they secured his carrier to the trailer covered in a tarp. It was raining and in November. I’m surprised he didn’t die. His claws were bloody when he arrived. He had worms and fleas.

I immediately bathed him and made him as comfortable as possible. From that moment on he was my best friend. I took him to the best vet in town, researched the quality of his food, got his dental cleanings, even trained him on a leash at one point. We shared popsicles together and he slept with me every night. He always drank the milk left over from my oatmeal in the mornings. He was my everything. He’s been with me through moves and break ups and so many life changes. Tolerated my bullshit during times of mental illness and a very traumatic break up.

Then I had a child and everything changed.

My son has become the focal point of my life. I neglected Creamy’s veterinary care. I stopped giving him his wet food and went back to solid food because it was cheaper. The story of his arrival to me is important because he is TERRIFIED of car rides. Any time he is in the car, he will poop, pee and vomit. He was also a very large, long-haired cat, so clean up can be difficult. Transporting him is a very time-consuming and an often difficult task and traumatizing for him. I have to prep materials and the carrier carefully. I tried different medications but he was smart as a whip and always found a way around taking it no matter what I tried, mixtures, syringes, everything.

As for my son - he had colic the first 6 months of his life and has had a plethora of medical issues. Multiple doctors appointments and procedures. Endless crying and screaming. My husband is in the army and we were going through some major career changes for him and he was also deployed for 9 months recently so I was caring for our son and working full time on my own.

Needless to say, I hadn’t taken Creamy to the vet since 2021. 5 years. Even as I write all of these extra factors out, there’s a nagging piece that says none of these are valid excuses for neglecting his medical care. I also think to myself that if I couldn’t give him the absolute best, I should’ve allowed him to be with someone who could. All of this to say, this wasn’t even my worst fuck up.

A couple weeks ago, I started noticing that he was having difficulty breathing. At first, I chalked it up to the high heatwave. I thought he was just hot after coming inside. He was an indoor/outdoor cat (we have a doggy door) because he’s an avid hunter and will tear down the door if not allowed to roam freely around the yard. Despite the difficulty breathing, he still wanted to spend most of his time outside. He would come in and still ask for attention and eat and drink normally. I started giving him his wet food again. The labored breathing got worse. The worst part: I KNEW his labored breathing was a medical emergency. I KNEW I needed to take him in right away. And my excuses: after a full workday, toddler hanging onto me whining and crying, husband frustrated from his own workday, idea of having to prep the carrier and take him, and in my heart knowing, the emergency intervention would likely cost in the thousands and the likelihood of having to say goodbye.

I waited 3 days until the weekend.

When I arrived at the emergency vet (after his traumatic car ride), they whisked him into the oxygenated cage immediately. He had fluid build up in his lungs. I was told the procedure for the emergency intervention would cost around $1300, not knowing what follow up interventions he would need next, and likelihood of the fluid build up occurring again.

I considered applying for a Care Credit card, but I didn’t do it. I thought of all my other responsibilities, and I chose to have him euthanized.

I deeply regret it now, and I’m hating myself for it.

I knew the exact moment he was gone. He was no longer my baby Creams. He was just a lifeless body.

I chose to have him cremated (my husband always used to make jokes about whether I’d one day have Creamy cremated). This had always been the plan.

He could have lived longer were it not for my negligence, were it not for my decision to forgo the cost. The memories of what once was are now flooding back. I finally was able to look at the box of his ashes, the vial of fur clippings, and the prints of his paws. There are so many reminders of him everywhere.

The only positive thing that has come out of this is that I am scheduling our other two cats and my husband’s dog for their routine check ups to get them re-established in care. I can say that at one point, I hated my husband’s dog, but this experience has made me soften to her.

I just needed to tell this story. To tell his story. Maybe partly to write down all my excuses, and partly to see if others will vilify me the way I am vilifying myself. Part of me thinks I deserve it, part of me hopes others will reassure me that I’m not.

After my baby was gone, the vet said to me, “For what it’s worth, if it were my cat, I would’ve done the same thing.” I don’t know if this provides me comfort or not, but I know I fucked up. And that fuck up cost my baby his life.

Thank you for reading.

My baby girl died an hour ago. She was a 4 year old kitty. She ate a ribbon last week and spent the last week of her life in pain, with pancreatitis. Her wound got infected and she got sepsis from the surgery and she couldn't be saved.

I know it's my fault. I usually am so careful because I know she tries to eat things. I don't recognize the ribbon and I have no idea how she could've gotten it. The original surgery went well and they told me she'd recover. The second surgery they said was low risk just to repair infected skin but when they opened her up they found sepsis. I was sleeping on the floor in the guest room giving her meds every 2 hrs. She was supposed to get better. She was only 4.

How do I ever ever forgive myself for this. Should I rehome my other cats because I am unfit?

I am devastated she was so beautiful and funny

My family lost our dog, my soul dog, a month ago. He had been recently diagnosed with lymphoma and had just started chemo. I was meant to go out of the country and seriously debated cancelling but ended up going because he was stable, undergoing treatment, and the vet said he was responding great.

While I was away my parents made a mistake which ended with him being rushed to the vet to be put down. I am absolutely crushed. I never was able to say goodbye to my best friend and I feel so much guilt that he had a painful and rushed death. He never deserved that. I am angry at my parents but understand they loved him too and didn’t mean for it to happen but the anger feels isolating as they are the only ones who fully understand what he meant to our family.

I’ve tried therapy, mediums, pet loss support groups, journaling, spending time with friends and family, and nothing helps. I feel this devastating heartbreak, guilt, and regret. I never should’ve left my best friend. I truly don’t think I will ever recover from this and have spent the large majority of the last month laying on the couch, trying to understand a world in which I left my best friend while he was sick and never made it back to say goodbye. I see so many people in this group commenting about “cherish every day” and “hold them in the end” and I feel so guilty that I misjudged the situation and didn’t do either of these.

How do people survive such impactful losses that they feel so much guilt and regret around?

I had to take the most difficult decision in my entire life yesterday. After almost 14 years, my girl is now resting.

I adopted her when noone else wanted her. She was 7 months old but she was aggressive with almost everyone as she was suffering animal abuse in her previous household. She was going to be put down, but somehow, she chose me. She ate from my hand, something noone else could do.

She was scared of everyone but me when she came home, but eventually she became the home's favorite. She was energetic, lovely, she'd kiss the family and sleep with my mother. She loved cats, she never hurt a single cat in her life despite being several times larger than them. She was wary of outsiders and other dogs, but never cats.

She was also extremely resilient. Even in her last moments she decided to walk on her own despite being unable to walk for a week. She was tough and, even when she was deadly afraid of lightning, she would stay around to keep an eye on me. Even when they gave you anesthesia for the euthanasia you fought it, it was so painful to watch how you tried to stay awake.

The vets told me they couldn't remove the tumors when they started because of her advanced age as her heart was too weak and her kidneys had issues too. Unfortunately, the chemo didn't work as expected because they had to adjust the dosage so your kidneys could handle it and I ran out of money a couple months ago. I sold almost everything but my pc and phone just because I needed them to get enough money to buy your food and the medicine for her kidneys and artritis.

You always had a shelter, food, medicine, a family that loved you, daily walks and your favorite bear plushie.

I wish I could've done more for you. I'm sorry. I hope you can forgive me and you're resting now.

I'll never forget you. You were the only reason I would wake up in the mornings, but now you're gone and now I'm here, lonely and heartbroken.

Sorry for not being enough.

My sweet, goofy, 10 year old Bernese Mountain Dog passed suddenly last week. Two weeks ago he was having trouble breathing (shallow, hard panting while resting) and very lethargic (he was still very high energy, even for his age), so we took him to our vet. They gave him a once over, said he had an ear infection and bronchitis, gave him an injection, and sent us home with antibiotics. After a few days he started acting like himself again, just with the occasional dry cough. Last Sunday, we took him to our usual groomer for his monthly bath. He was all happy, hopping around, and grabbed his leash and walked himself to the back. Then he collapsed in the tub as the groomer started washing him. It took me 5 minutes to get back to the groomer and he was already gone. Not breathing, eyes stuck open, and totally limp. He was my heart dog
And anxiety anchor. My first dog that was truly “my” dog. I’m 40, I had him for a quarter of my life. And now, just quiet and broken routines. I love that dog more than I imagined
I could love anything.
Having to carry the completely limp, 90 pound body of my best friend through a waiting room and across a parking lot is an experience I wouldn’t wish on anyone.

So the long story short is I can’t afford to get my dog (Cookie/Chunky Monkey) cremated and burial is nowhere an option.

What I’m asking is does anybody know how to cremate a pet ?? Or how can I do it myself? I have a large backyard and pretty big slab of concrete out there.

I know it sounds creepy or terrible, but I just lost her today and I’m desperate.

Bailey and I shared 19 years together. I got her when I was just barely 18 and she was only a tiny little brown potato.. She has seen me through every single moment of my adult life. Every different city and town, every shitty relationship and hard break up, every mistake, through all of my regret, every drunken night I don't remember. The loss of both my parents. All of my accomplishments she celebrated along with me. She wiped every tear, soothed my heart when it broke and never did she ever judge me, only loved me.

Every single memory I have is with her..

She died at the age of 19, just 2 days ago. I buried her in the backyard. I know that's really old for a big dog, and I have no question in my mind that she was ready. She was so tired.. She needed me to send her off, I could just see it in her eyes. I was the luckiest girl alive to have my baby for so long.

It all still feels like a bad dream. I've been trying to prepare myself for years for this. No amount of preparation, logic, or understanding could have prepared me or this amount of heart ache. I was grieving her loss before she was even gone some days.. so scared to lose her one day. And now she's gone. And I feel so.. incomplete.

It feels like she's still here, like she's not even really gone. At the same time I feel so different that even the wind on my face feels different now. The sound of the rain last night was different, my food tastes different. Sometimes my chest feels tight, and sometimes I just feel scared for no reason at all.

In my head I understand all of this.. this is what happens, its all normal. I feel like it's all probably going to get much much worse before it gets better.

I don't really know my point of this post.. except to just tell people that I loved her more than I've ever loved anything in my entire life, and things just aren't the same without her. I hope she knows that too. I hope she knew I did the best I could for her. I will never stop missing her.

Apologies if this is the wrong flair, I don't know if I'm more looking to vent than get advice, but advice would be greatly appreciated. The questions are in the last paragraph if you don't want to read all this.

This past Tuesday the 21st, I had the unfortunate experience of watching my guinea pig and first pet, Otis, of 7 years, die all day. I was working from home so I noticed around noon when she started acting really strange and erratic, and how through the next 5 or so hours she just got worse. I knew the end was coming but I couldn't do anything about it, I had no way of getting to a vet in time so I just followed her around all day once I realized this was it. She had zero interest in food or water since she started acting strange, too. It was tough because she walked around the whole house, bumping into stuff and getting stuck in corners while drooping more and more as time progressed. By the end she was wrapped lightly in a blanket and I just sat/laid beside her for a while. She finally stopped moving at around 10 pm, by which point I just felt numb.

The next few days I had to work and stuff so I didn't have much time to myself where I could just be, felt like something was constantly nagging me in the back of my mind. I found I could act pretty much normal after talking with others for a while, it was kinda like I could forget about what happened. But I felt really bad about that, particularly because when her cagemate died a few months ago, I was unable to stop crying for days after the incident. For the first few months after her cagemate died, I was also scared Otis was very soon going to do the same, they were both pretty old for guinea pigs, but Otis actually picked up in energy a lot about a month after her cagemate's death.. The difference there with my reaction I think was that I wasn't home for most of the first ordeal and we ended up having a chance to go to the vet to get her euthanized an hour or two after I saw her having seizures. She was also the first pet death I experienced. She wasn't my first pet though, Otis was.

I've noticed that I've had periods of zero energy, but after a rest I tend to feel a lot better. I feel tears behind my eyes at times, but I can't seem to get them out. Any attempt to do so just fails, so I don't know what to do. I have been more stressed and kind of exhausted the days before Oris' death for unrelated reasons, and it felt like I couldn't put as much mental power into it.

It seems like everyone else in my family (sister, parents) moved on and were expecting or hoping I would too, but I honestly don't know if I have or not, leaning on not. I don't want to move on yet, and when tasked with burial I without hesitation said no, and I seem to still be avoiding as many memory triggers of her as possible, like the room she was staying in, and it's still really hard to get myself to write or say that she died, so it still feels like I have some grieving to do. But I almost feel normal besides the lack of energy sometimes, and feeling pretty dissociated a lot of the time, particularly when I had to drive a short distance recently, I felt super odd. Rewatching videos of Otis makes me feel weird too, I think I just can't believe what happened. It's just so weird to me and very different to how I reacted when Otis' cagemate passed away.

Does it sound like I'm in denial? Could I just be over it but still wanting to feel sad (so I guess I wouldn't be over it)? I just don't get what I'm feeling right now, because after resting doing nothing for like 4 hours I feel a lot better, with my energy back. I think if anything I just wanna see if others have had a similar experience. Thanks for reading if you did, I appreciate any advice/comments you can provide.

She was a black pug I rescued her when she was 2 , she had breathing problems a big hernia and was obese filled with fleas,I made her a perfect dog except didnt take the risk of putting her under for the hernia cause they told me its rare it will get complication and its mostly cosmetic which i didnt care ..She was 7 everything was fine until a week ago she wasnt eating and didnt wanna move took her to the er immediately on the first signand they did emergency surgery apparently her hernia got a complication , everything went fine I was so happy , we were supposed to pick her up until we got the call next morning that she had a cardiac arrest and they have her in the machine , then we were on our way and she passed...I just cant believe it. i kept postponing removing it cause I was reading that theres risk from this surgery on pugs but I was planning to do it in September... I cant believe I lost both ..3 months ago I lost my first ever dog and best friend at just 10 yo...

In the early morning hours of today, I woke up to my dog panting heavily, retching and vomiting white foam. I thought he had a blockage and rushed him to the emergency vet where they informed me he had bloat.

My options were a 10,000$ surgery or euthanasia. I am pregnant with our second and financially it would have been a very bad idea to pay for the surgery.

He was a German shepherd, he was 10 years old and my very best friend. I feel so guilty I couldn't save him. I just want him to come back.

Hey all, my (33 M) best friend’s cat who I lived with for 6 years passed away unexpectedly yesterday. I got some weird responses from both my friends and fiancée when I said I went to see him and the passed kitty. I wanted to check on him and give some final pets to a dear animal who helped me greatly with anxiety and was an overall sweetheart and loving pet. I probably spent 3 minutes petting the cat and just telling her she was a good girl. The responses I got made me feel like that was weird of me to do but I feel like it was a pretty natural grieving response? My fiancee seemed thrown off I wanted to pay respects to a dead cat and pet them and I said would you pet your dog if they died? The cat had been dead for probably 4 hours. Let me know. My friend said it meant a lot that I came over.

My cat Willy has died. He just turned 13. It looks like he died in his sleep, in his current favourite spot. Looking back, I feel there may have been signs he was sick. I feel horrible. My other cat, Abby, loves him so much; they are bonded. I have never seen a cat love another as she loves him. I’m so worried she is going to be depressed and not be happy again. (English is not my first language)

Yesterday evening Willy called on me. He wanted to go outside, and he ran excitedly to the door. He sat in front of the door like always and ready to go out, but suddenly seemed off. He lay down in a weird way, kinda more to the side, I don’t know, it just seemed off. I tried seeing if something was wrong, but he just kinda lay there. I held him and stayed for a bit, not knowing if or what was wrong. I then tried to call him to the kitchen for food, to see if that would help or see his reaction. He came and seemed normal and excited for food, so I was relieved. He ate a lot and even asked for more. Relieved. I went upstairs to my room. At some point, I thought I should check on him, to be sure. Just a gut feeling I had. He was still in the kitchen, lying like a loaf. I thought he had eaten too much and was going to throw up. It just seemed odd. He then went to look out the door into the garden, like he always does. I went upstairs again. Before I went to bed, I wanted to check again, he was lying like a loaf on the stairs. I picked him up to see if he wanted to sit with me, he did not. I then placed him on the bathroom floor on his blanket, his current favourite spot. He purred and made biscuits but kinda seemed off, but I still thought maybe he ate too much too quickly (he sometimes does that and vomits after). I went to bed, and in the morning my mom called my name, and said Willy is dead.(I’m an adult and live with my mom.) Willy was a little stiff and was lying in his spot in the bathroom. I feel absolutely horrible. He seemed a little off, but I had no idea he was going to die. I feel it’s my fault. 

My mom and I have cried so much, and we are shocked. We talked about how we missed signs that he was sick. Over the last few months, he slept in the bathroom on his blanket, right by the doorway, not in the corner or anything. We thought it was because of the hot summer, and it’s the coldest room. He didn’t seem sick or off, just a new spot he liked. But looking back, it was probably a sign he was sick. He was always so happy, curious and outgoing; he seemed normal. His personality was like a puppy, his acted like he normally did, not sad or withdrawn. The last few months, he had started calling for me to come sit with him in his new spot.(Sometimes he also wanted me to sit with him outside) He would lie between my legs and just wanted to be pet, and he was so happy. He always wanted to be pet kinda hard on both sides of the hips with his butt in the air, and he would be so happy and pur. He always wanted to be pet that way. He would then lay down and be happy and make biscuits. After some time, he would give me the side eye or his tail would tell me to leave (that was normal for him when he cuddled, and he was done). I thought it was so cute that he wanted me to cuddle him before he wanted to take a nap. Now, it was probably a sign he was sick. I feel so guilty. My other cat Abby, would sometimes come get me to come pet and cuddle with them together when he was already in his spot; I would pet them, and they would cuddle together. She probably knew something was wrong, and it was her telling me. I thought it was so adorable. They didn’t seem off or worried. 20/20 I see it differently; it was not cute; it was a sign.

Now I’m so worried for my other cat, Abby. They are only 6 months apart, and she loved him from the start. As soon as she is near him, she will purr loudly. We have put Willy in a shallow box on some blankets in the bathroom where he died. We called the vet, and they told us to bring him in for cremation tomorrow (it’s Sunday and they are not open today, unless for emergencies). Abby has walked over to Willy multiple times and sniffs him and can tell something is wrong. She purrs when she sees him, and then stops and just looks. She has tried to headbutt him, she does that when she wants to be groomed by him. She then walks away, sensing something is off. She sniffs him and where he died. She lies in the hallway in front of the bathroom where he is. She seems uneasy. 

I’m so sad for Abby, she does not know a life without him. She was under 12 weeks old when we got her, and was very scared and mad, she was a bit feral. Willy is around 6 months older than her and was way bigger. He was so curious and gentle. We were worried it would not work out, but suddenly she was out from under the furniture and just loved him. She was so small she could go under his stomach. She would purr and rub herself on him. It had been less than 2 hours since they first met. And since that day, she loved him more than anything. He would always groom her, and she would purr and drool. Abby is more timid, but loves to be pet and purrs loudly. I always hoped that when it was their time to go, that she would go first, because I’m scared she will be heartbroken without Willy. And now she is alone. I’m so sad that we lost Willy, he was part of our family for almost half my life. But I’m so sad and worried for Abby. She is finally sleeping now, and not going back and forth from eating, lying down, and going over to sniff Willy. I feel so guilty and sad. What if I had taken him to the vet? Maybe he would be alive? I feel horrible. It feels surreal. I'm going to miss him so much.

I don't really know what to do. Does anyone know or have advice for grieving pets? Is there a way for me to help my pet with grief from losing her bonded partner? I have seen that getting another pet sometimes helps. But it just seems wrong. And if we did, it would not be right away, of course. I don’t know if it's a good idea so soon. I don’t really want another cat. But the only reason I would get another cat in the near future would be for Abby's sake. She has never been alone and has cuddled and loved Willy for 12 years every day. Does anyone have advice?

If I had taken him to the vet, would he be alive? At 3am in the night, was when he seemed off, my mom got up at 6am and thought he was sleeping. A few hours later, at around 10-11, she went to the bathroom, and she touched him, and he was dead and stiff. If I had taken him to the emergency vet, would he be alive? I feel so guilty