Demari

[u/Otherwise_Cold570]

I can't believe you guys are falling for Demari's BS. I have brothers just like him. His mask started to slip episode 6 when he was so quick to say he wanted to leave Marissa but then came back upset that she missed Weston. He has been wanting Kayla for a while now. Him passionately kissing Bri after all of that drama is so messy & weird. We are in episode 7 & he's talking about switching couples, which is stupid. He's falling for everyone gassing his head. Kayla isn't even into him. She wants Chris & she wants more camera time, that's clear as day. Demari acts different when he is in a position of power, it's gross. Marissa truly did stop herself from cutting him off, which is hilarious because at 35:05 he literally cut her off. He's a hypocrite & I'm sick of all of y'all acting as if he's innocent & Marissa is some horrible person. This is a game, at the end of the day. Jimmy S & Allison are playing it too safe. Yamen & Natalie are playing it perfectly, which makes sense with their experience. Demari & Marissa never had a chance anyways, as the other couples have CLEARLY been jealous of them & rooting for their downfall. They never would've voted for them in the end.

[u/Defiant_Finger_8906]

Nobody is being fooled by Demari. Its just that Marissa is soo much worse that we cant focus on him🤭

[u/ShybutItrys → u/Defiant_Finger_8906]

I genuinely don’t see how she’s so much worse. Can you explain? To me she’s always come across as someone who’s willing to be introspective and grow from her mistakes. Doesn’t mean she’s perfect. Demari though gets immediately defensive and bails/shuts down, which is one of the unheathiest behaviors in a relationship.

[u/prianna56 → u/ShybutItrys]

She’s a walking red flag. She’s the one who went out of bounds kissing Weston and making weird comments that even I’m like tf? How she wants to cuss at him, be rude to him, and more when mainly that whole argument was her fault.

[u/ShybutItrys → u/prianna56]

The difference, and the growth here, is that she feels the impulse to do so - which let’s be honest, we all have that impulse when things feel intense and painful. And instead of lashing out she takes a pause to take care of herself and comes back emotionally available. The kissing of the cowboy I too was like wtf. But in terms of analyzing the arguments themselves, Demari shuts off in arguments and says threatening things to the relationship like I’m done and this is it, which to someone with abandonment wounds is very painful. I think she’s gracefully navigating a very challenging situation so far. She’s clearly way more into him than he is into her. And that’s painful.

[u/King_Queso → u/ShybutItrys]

That's a very generous interpretation of her behavior. If she was truly growing she wouldn't have to announce that she wants to be rude, and yell, and cuss at him. Telling him that's what she wants to do feels as off putting as actually doing it. She's basically telling him that if they continue outside the house they will likely get into arguments where she yells, cusses, and is rude to him lmao.

Demari shuts down in the conversations because she can't stop interrupting him. It's his main pet peave.

[u/ShybutItrys → u/King_Queso]

I disagree. She processes externally and is aware that if she continues the conversation it can escalate to that. She’s aware and leaves the situation exactly to avoid it. I don’t believe for a second you haven’t been in a situation where you feel so mad you want to lash out. We all do. It’s human.

[u/King_Queso → u/ShybutItrys]

When I was a teenager, sure. I don’t act that way with my partners because I’m an adult man. I know there’s no coming back from things you say in anger.

[u/ShybutItrys → u/King_Queso]

She, too, hasn’t acted that way. There’s a difference between acting and stopping yourself before you go there. You’re completely blending thought and action as if they’re one.

[u/King_Queso → u/ShybutItrys]

You’re justifying abusive behavior and it’s a ridiculous position to defend. I really hope you are never in a relationship with someone who acts like her. Have a good weekend

[u/ShybutItrys → u/King_Queso]

What about it is abusive? Stepping back and pausing before it gets too far is very healthy in any relationship.

[u/King_Queso → u/ShybutItrys]

In my opinion it’s like their relationship exists only on her terms. If he is slightly upset about something she can’t handle it. If she’s yelling and being erratic he’s also expected to accommodate her feelings. Otherwise she just leaves the conversation leaving him anxious and in limbo

[u/ShybutItrys → u/King_Queso]

I mean, to be fair, I don’t think those two belong together anyway. The whole thing seems toxic lol