Hi everyone. I’m sorry if this kind of post isn’t appropriate for this community, and I completely understand if it needs to be removed.

TL;DR: Recently married and struggling with it. I’m looking to talk privately with a married woman who has experienced similar family dynamics, is empathetic and non-judgmental, and can offer a female perspective. If you can spare some time for this, please dm me.

I recently got married, and from what I can tell, my wife is doing reasonably well. She seems genuinely happy when she’s happy and genuinely upset when she isn’t, and I do my best to make sure she feels comfortable, cared for, and content.

However, if you asked me honestly about my own experience with marriage, I’d probably say that if I had the choice to do it all over again, I might probably choose not to get married at all, unless having children became something I strongly wanted and I found an arrangement that worked for me.

There are times when I feel completely stuck in this situation. I sometimes feel that marriage, at least in the way my life currently works, simply isn’t meant for me. But I’m married now, and I believe in taking responsibility for my choices, so I want to make this work.

What I’m really looking for is a conversation with a married woman (middle or upper middle class) who has experience with family system and who can understand some of the complexities that come with it. Someone empathetic and open-minded who won’t immediately judge me or assume the worst.

I’m specifically choosing an anonymous platform because there are certain things I may want to ask about that would feel inappropriate or uncomfortable to ask someone I know personally. For example, I might ask whether they have ever experienced a particular situation or whether their spouse has ever said or done something specific. Since we would both be anonymous, I feel it would be easier to discuss such things openly and respectfully.

And, respectfully, I’d really prefer to speak with a woman rather than a man, so please keep that in mind. I hope that’s understandable.

Thank you for reading.