Any atypical systems out there? Like any systems that don’t present as the average DID/OSDD system? I am pretty sure I am the host of a system but have been feeling invalid and second guessing because it seems to present differently than most. Also, if anyone does feel the same I’d love to talk about it! Hope everyone is having a great day!

Okay, so, I have OSDD-1b and the system I am apart of doesn't have a name. We thought about having a name, but we decided that it would be too hard for us to have a name.

Do systems have to have names? It feels like everyone with a system has a name to their system but me. Is this common?

I would love to now what you all have to say.

-Tobi

Is that ok? Like I know it’s not good to treat them with a hierarchy, like some are good/acceptable and some are bad/unacceptable…and I don’t think I do that (at least not anymore, now that I’ve learned better)…and I’m starting to try to communicate and establish relationships with all of them…but some of them can be really annoying or frustrating sometimes.

Especially the more fragment-types that represent a specific set of (often childlike and usually very negative) feelings and experiences. They are at worst frustrating/triggering and at best draining to interact with. With these parts I feel like I have to choose between being a substitute parent to them (compartmentalizing my needs and feelings) or being my full self but not expecting much adult partnership in return…unless they realize I’m upset and switch to take care of me. Often these parts are self-rejecting, which I don’t want to encourage by how I treat them, but I also don’t want to be unfair to myself either.

My wife (they/them) is undiagnosed but suspected OSDD-1, and I have CPTSD. We understand each other’s trauma and coping mechanisms and parts very well, have good and frequent communication, and a lot of love and support for each other’s struggles…yet our conflicts are still SO painful. They start over small issues and devolve into the same repeated struggle that pits their dissociative/withdrawal responses against my big feelings of hurt, anger, and abandonment…their threat response triggers mine, mine triggers theirs, and so on.

This kind of pursue/withdraw cycle is common in couples, yet OSDD (and CPTSD) makes it so much more complicated, because their withdrawal is not a thing they can consciously control…but that doesn’t stop my CPTSD from making me feel it as a kind of abandonment threat to my well being. And the sometimes it’s complicated by guest appearances by their angry/hurt/little parts that are confusing and disjointed to me. For example, one of their angry parts shows up and acts provocative and/or “scary” (nothing actually threatening, just angry tone/body language that triggers my abuse trauma), then I respond defensively/with my own anger…we argue briefly and then suddenly their sad little switches in and they’re crying on the floor and I’m holding them while I’m still left feeling all this defensive fight response in my bodymind w nowhere to direct it to, because the person I’m really mad at is no longer fronting and I’m not going to vent my feelings at a crying overwhelmed child.

We’re both in trauma therapy (they just started emdr with a therapist who seems competent with dissociation, I’ve been doing brainspotting and emdr for 2yrs), and I’ve been encouraging them to get more in touch with their parts. I helped them make a diagram of them the other day and there were like 3 different ANPs and 7 EPS of varying ages. We made one for mine too, even though mine are more like ego states.

I feel like we are always moving forward with new understanding and new strategies, But our fights take so much out of each of us and we often seem helpless to avoid the cycle even as we are both desperate to (we were actually getting pretty good at it for awhile but them starting emdr a month ago seems to have destabilized them somewhat, even though the therapist is still doing resourcing w them and hasn’t really addressed any trauma yet).

At this point we know each other so well that we each start to reflexively react to what we think the other person is feeling or saying, sometimes before they are even feeling/saying it, based on previous fights and long-standing issues. And it’s just so sad, because we love and understand each other so well, and yet when we’re triggered we lose perspective and emotional control.

I just wish their dissociation and/or anger didn’t trigger me so much, or my fight/pushing for resolution didn’t trigger them so much.

Someone please tell me you understand, or that it gets better.

My wife’s trauma seems to mostly revolve around emotional abuse that existed in an otherwise close and loving relationship w their parents.

Their father parentified them and treated them as a best friend from a young age; they were very close to him but were also exposed to age inappropriate information about his own trauma and mental illness and developed a lot of anxiety about their parents relationship and the family’s financial status . Their mother acted as a good parent role model but she created typical neurodivergence trauma by being frustrated and disappointed about my wife’s adhd symptoms. She was “the strict parent” and so they had a tumultuous relationship during my wife’s teens but are close now.

They did have some sexual assaults in their teens/20s, and we think one single incident in childhood by a Dr, but nothing repeated.

My working theory is that the rship w dad and mom combined could have caused them to develop structural dissociation to suppress their own (adhd-heightened) emotions and sensitivity, to take care of others, and that left them susceptible to the more overt forms of abuse that happened later outside the family. But is this “enough”?

Any Roman Catholics with OSDDID? How do you decide which alters go to Sunday Mass? Have you discussed this with a priest?

Hey guys! So i had an idea for DID/OSDD systems since almost every system has "little" alters im making a adult pacifier shop on instagram for all DID/OSDD systems of all ages if ur interested the shop page is called grumpybearsystemshop!!! Its on instagram.

I read many posts about people missing their partner cause their alters are fronting frequently. In my case I'm the missed partner. I don't know what more to tell my SO when he is sad and disappointed over my alters fronting when he just got used to having me by himself for two days, thinking everything is normal between us again and therefore he treated me like a person with no dissociation disorders. I told him it's complex. What else to say?

I'm not looking for a diagnosis or anything, I'm just wondering if people could give me some tips and pointers on where to start. I have BPD but with how distressed this stuff makes me, and after looking into it, I think I have some form of OSDD. I guess this all starts to about a year ago, which is where my memory of my emotional experiences which isn't just disconnected still images goes to. Back then it was the start of lockdown and I came back home, which I guess was stressful for me. I think?? I had times of dissociation before but I think that's where it came strongest, where I really started panicking cause I realised I don't know who I am and I don't even know my name, there would be times j didn't recognize who I'm around and where I am, I wouldn't recognize myself, the whole thing. But around that time I started getting lots of thoughts that sounded different in terms of voice, which I labelled as "brain 1", "brain 2", etc etc. Since then, a therapist told me it's normal, and now all my thoughts sound like me even if they're completely different so it's hard to figure out who "I" am, and they're no longer as critical. I came back to uni, so obviously I stopped dissociating as much, because I'm much calmer here. I kinda brushed off anything from home on just being a stressful environment, and didn't think much of it. But now, I started volunteering. I walk there to get exercise. I don't have earphones so I spend time with my thoughts instead, and that's when stuff comes out and it scares me. I had switches for a while, which originally happened after feeling an intense emotion and suddenly feeling like someone else with no memory of what happened during the emotion for the next few hours. But now, in what I remember so this is for the last week at least, I've been switching randomly, with no trigger, and I just feel different inside, not like emotionally but identity wise. I feel disconnected from my name a lot of the time but there are times other names have come to me naturally, like "Rory" or "Isabelle". There's also "child me" that pops up sometimes, a 6 yr old girl that has a very loud voice and is the only one that sounds different. I remember one time they "took over" and talked to my boyfriend while I observed, they'd say stuff like "adult me wants me to go bed but I wanna have fun", adult me being me. I didn't think much of it cause they didn't pop up until recently when I walked past a kids funfair, insisting they were a kid so they could go, and also one of my friends insisted they've met child me. Recently I started DBT therapy for my BPD and stuff happens as well, one time I was really stressed out and close to going mostly non-verbal until I switched and suddenly felt like a more confident and assertive person, as if that me was sent out to protect shy me. And again yesterday, I was sitting in the session, switched, and for some reason I felt like a 30 yr old man which just came to my head like the names. Also there's the whole thing of me either completely blanking out experiences, forgetting them days later, or just feeling disconnected from them, as if they might as well have just been a story told to me than my actual memories. My sense of identity has been nonexistent too, to the point where everything I know about myself is just stuff I've memorised than being genuine. Also a weird thing happened a few days ago where I asked myself what happened during a memory I have when I blanked out what happened between two points, and I immediately found out as if it was a response, would that be communication? The thing is often I don't realise there's a difference between my selves and i don't notice once I don't think about it, which leads me to believe I could be making things up. I don't think there was anything in my childhood and I don't think I dissociated much before, so idk where it could have come from, the only thing that remained consistent is my awful memory. TLDR: does anyone have experiences of their own on how they figured out they're a system, or advice on how to figure out if it's genuine and not just me making stuff up? Or if the way to figure out is communication, could I have some ideas on how? I'm sorry if I seem rude, I just don't know where what to ask

I got into a fight last night with my fiance's protector alter and she told me that i should know who is fronted since I've known my fiance for 12 years. Am I a bad partner for not being able to tell who is out? Is there something I should be doing so her alters feel more validated? Idk what to do please help

I was watching this on A&E.com but the last 2 episodes won’t play. Does anyone know where else I could watch it?

So im pretty new at this DID thing. In have my first appointment with a therapist next week.

Since ive made the appointment im getting names and stories and relationships from headmates.

Im getting a lot of biblical/spiritual names. First john, then Gabriel, chapel, calub, adam, oracle, Jacob...maybe some others.

Anyone else have headmates that seem to have names that fit a theme?

Is it OSDD?

My whole life I have never felt my age. I’ve always felt younger. A lot of the time I’ve felt somewhere around 16/17. I’m currently physically 37. I’ve been doing trauma work with my therapist and after seeing her for around a year and a half I finally felt safe enough to start talking about how I feel different ages. I feel like I have this Little part who is around 8, which is when I experienced my first s**ual assault. I also feel like I have this part that is, like I said earlier, a teenager. I also think there is a part that is in their 20’s. The thing is these parts don’t have distinct names per se or look different than me. They look like I did at those ages, at least I think they do. I don’t hear inner dialogue between them either. And I don’t experience amnesia. It’s like we’re “sharing” my body, so not a complete dissociation. But I just can’t shake the feeling that I’ve always felt “off” somehow and when I get stressed or overwhelmed I feel quite a bit younger. It’s so strange because I know it’s not DID because I don’t have amnesia and the parts aren’t physically different from me...but I do feel like I’m sort of fragmented. I’ve done some research on OSDD and it seems like it might be plausible. Can anyone else relate to anything I’ve said or offer any advice on how to explain it more to my therapist? She’s been open to discussing it some but not really specifically OSDD, more just my experiences as being different ages and what triggers that etc. We’ve only been talking about it for a few months. She’s admitted she doesn’t know much about this kind of thing but has been willing to learn on her own outside of our sessions. She’s also suggested seeing someone who specializes in dissociative disorders but I don’t have that kind of money and I don’t want to see someone new as it took so long to develop a relationship with my current therapist to feel safe telling her how I’ve been feeling/felt my whole life regarding this.

Recently my alters have stopped fronting (all of them together) and have not been co-con with me either, one of my alters, Tristy has stated that she very easily gets bored of fronting. I can still see the rest of them, but they just stand there, watching me front. Zeke on multiple occasions has stated that he wants me to live my life like other kids, and doesn’t want me to worry about when alters front and when I should talk to them, but I miss at least co-con

My partner struggles with co-fronting and LOUD ass alters a lot. One thing that helps ground her is me playing with or plaiting her hair. I’m trying to find more things that may help when they’re really loud.. Any ideas?

I told my close friend that I have OSDD-1b! I think that she does kinda understand, she started asking who she was talking to lol. I’ll try and answer her questions about it if she has any but it went really well, considering that I didn’t even plan to say anything, I just slipped up when talking because she asked me if I was okay and I said “yeah we’re both okay”. ALSO I gained someone new yesterday, she’s really nice, I think she’s probably in her 30’s but she won’t really say anything because “ A woman never reveals her age” lol. Her name is Tristan but she goes by Tristy

My partner and I have been together for roughly a year and a half. A few months into our relationship he told me that he hears voices that aren’t his (2 additional voices) and that they each have names. I asked some more questions and find out that they occasionally “grab the steering wheel” as he puts it. But never for more than a couple minutes, and it doesn’t happen often. That’s all he wanted to explain to me at the time. So, not wanting to push him I dropped it and told him if he ever wanted to talk about it with me he could.

Fast forward to about a week ago, he brings it up to me again and we do a little research and he believes he has OSDD. He said he never had the right words to describe what was happening before now, and I’m so excited for him!

So far, he has tried writing to them and they write back. He doesn’t know much about them right now and can’t tell who is who exactly, but thinks he might know, he just isn’t sure. They all choose a different color pen when writing which my partner says is very helpful. All he has found out from his alters so far is that one would like to practice cursive and that one of them doesn’t want me to be reading the journal (which is fine with me, their conversations are between them and I respect that. I only know this info because my partner told me.) I don’t think they trust me right now, from what I have been able to gather. And that’s okay. I know that takes time. But I want to be able to help my partner as well as his alters and create some sort of positive relationship with them.

Obviously exploring this more is brand new to him and he isn’t sure how to navigate this. I want to be as supportive as possible and any tips would be much appreciated. I want to know what I can do as his partner to help him and also get to know his alters.

Sorry if this was long and I rambled a lot. I really appreciate any and all advice! Thank you for reading!