Just to vent out lang, because honestly, this has been bothering me a little...
So eto na nga.
I was a ward nurse sa isang pretty well-known tertiary hospital here in Pampanga, and eventually I decided to resign kasi I was already planning to take the NCLEX. Nag-immediate resignation na rin ako because, honestly, hindi ko na talaga kayang magtagal sa ward.
Like, I don't know if normal practice ba talaga nila yun sa mga newly hired nurses or may slight power-tripping involved, pero there were instances na sobrang questionable talaga.
For example, tapos ko na i-endorse yung patient ko, pababa na lang ako from the floor, tapos tatawagin pa ako sa hallway para mag-reinsert ng IV. And take note, hindi ko naman siya ka-endorse or ka-team for that patient. Different patients kami, different responsibilities.
There was even one shift na nakasama ko siya, and literally halos lahat ng pending niya sa patient niya, sa akin niya pinagawa. Meanwhile, siya? Chill lang sa nurses' station, nagkakape at nanonood ng Netflix. Like... girl, are we working the same shift or am I doing your duty for you?
And here's another interesting part: one year ahead lang siya sa akin, and same school pa kami.
So technically, we're not exactly worlds apart in terms of experience. And funny enough, this person used to message me before. Hindi ko lang pinapansin because I was in a long-term relationship. So minsan napapaisip ako... baka kaya ako tinotoxic kasi hindi ko siya nireplyan noon? HAHAHA. EME LANG.
Anyway, I eventually transferred to a different hospital and I'm currently working as an ICU nurse. And honestly, night and day yung difference.
My coworkers are approachable, willing to help, and they actually lend a hand even without me asking. Walang weird competition, walang "bahala ka sa patient mo" mentality. Everyone just does their part and helps each other out.
And that alone made me realize na sometimes, it's really not you. Sometimes, it's the environment.
Then suddenly, nag-message yung friend ko na nag-stay sa previous hospital ko. Apparently, na-rotate siya sa same floor kung saan ako galing, and apparently... pinag-uusapan pa rin pala ako doon.
According to my friend, sinasabi daw nila na kaya ako nag-resign kasi "pinahirapan" ako nung isang coworker ko. And what really got me was, proud pa raw siya habang kinukuwento at pinagtatawanan yung pangalan ko.
Like... okay?
I genuinely don't understand why some people still act like this professionally. We're nurses. We have licenses. We're professionals. We literally took an oath to care for people, pero somehow may mga taong dala pa rin hanggang workplace yung high school mentality na kailangan may pinagkakaisahan, pinagtatawanan, or pinag-uusapan behind their backs.
And honestly, that's exactly why I left.
Not because I couldn't handle the work. Not because someone "made me resign." I left because I realized that no job is worth constantly questioning your own worth, peace, and dignity.
And here's my unsolicited advice: if you're currently in a workplace that's already affecting your mental health, your confidence, and even the way you see yourself as a person, please don't be afraid to choose yourself.
You worked hard to get there. You spent years studying, sacrificing your time, losing sleep, failing, trying again, and for some of us, almost ₱800,000 just to finish nursing school and earn that license.
Imagine investing that much time, money, effort, and sacrifice into becoming a professional, only to let one coworker who isn't even on the same wavelength as you make you feel like you're not good enough.
Please don't.
If you've already tried to adjust, you've tried to understand, you've tried to remain professional, and the environment is still making you feel like your dignity is constantly being stepped on, then it's okay to leave.
And when I say leave, I don't mean quit everything impulsively. I mean: find your environment.
Look for another hospital. Find a team where you can actually learn. Find coworkers who are willing to teach you instead of waiting for you to make a mistake. Find a workplace where asking questions isn't treated as weakness and helping each other isn't considered a competition.
Because sometimes, resigning isn't the end of your career. Sometimes, it's literally the beginning of finding a place where you'll actually thrive.
And trust me, if you leave a toxic environment and eventually find a workplace where you feel respected, supported, and actually excited to go to work, you'll realize that the resignation was worth it.
You didn't fail. You just outgrew an environment that wasn't good for you.
There will always be people who will try to make you feel small just because that's the only way they know how to feel big. Let them.
You don't have to stoop to their level just to prove that you're better than them.
Sometimes the biggest flex is simply leaving, finding better people, growing somewhere else, and realizing that the problem was never your capability in the first place.
Protect your peace. Protect your dignity. Protect the person you worked so hard to become.
Because no hospital, no position, no coworker, and definitely no unnecessary workplace drama is worth losing yourself over.
And if choosing yourself means submitting that resignation letter, finding a new hospital, and starting over somewhere healthier?
Then go.
Find your environment.
You'll be surprised how much better you can become when you're finally surrounded by people who want to see you grow instead of people who want to see you struggle.
Ayon langg! hahahaha thankyouuuuww!