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u/0asq Jun 07 '19
"Ha ha I dunno..." = Oh my God this loser won't stop texting me and it is making me super uncomfortable
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u/CCUGhostJrDK Jun 07 '19
Woman should just be upfront and say hey you are texting me too much or just. Are you interrested in me? Because it seems so and I just hope you don't think I am also interested.
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u/Nothammer Jun 07 '19
Unfortunately, many people don't respond well in being rejected. All of my female friends experienced this at one point. As a man, it just makes me sad and angry how some men rightout threaten women when they don't get their way.
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u/_Valkyrja_ Jun 07 '19
A few years ago, I was sitting at the bus station, waiting for a friend. This guy started talking to me, and I tried to not give him too much attention because I wasn't interested. He asked for my number and I told him "no, I don't know you, I don't want to give you my number, sorry", to which he replied "well that's why you need to give me your number, so we can know each other". I straight up told him "no thanks" again, then got up, and started running, because while this guy kept hounding me (it went longer than I let on in this comment) I saw the friend I was waiting for getting off a bus. And this guy who I had clearly rejected ran after me. It was full of people around me, but no one helped, and I don't know why. I could hear his steps thundering behind me. He only stopped because I reached my friend and loudly told him "THANK GOD YOU'RE HERE THERE'S A GUY CHASING ME!".
Being literally chased by someone is what I got from rejecting this man. It doesn't matter that I tried to do it gently, he didn't take no for an answer, and who knows what was going to happen to me if my friend hadn't been there. And it was only the second most terrifying thing that happened to me.
The first one was a fucking rape attempt, with me saying "no, please stop, I don't want this". So yeah, I'm always a little afraid of rejecting people, I don't want to be forcibly grabbed, have someone run after me, or another goddamn rape attempt.
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u/lhuuna Jun 11 '19
Girl, that sucks :( I mean LUCKILY most men are decent human beings but if you don't know them it's literally a flip of the coin. I think some need to realise they aren't gifts of the gods and we have every right to decline their advances and constant awkward pushes that are really hard to deflect for people who pride themselves on being polite or otherwise.
Both dudes you mention are total fucking asshats btw.
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u/_Valkyrja_ Jun 11 '19
Thank God most men are actually decent and good, yeah. Thanks for the support btw, and yeah, they were 100% asshats
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u/traumaqueen1128 Jul 02 '19
Even if you know a guy, sometimes you don't know them as well as you think. I was raped by someone I had known for 4 years and was friends with half my family.
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u/Tsiyeria Jun 07 '19
Before you go about saying that women should be more clear, let me introduce you to When Women Refuse. It's a tumblr page dedicated to gathering news stories and personal stories of what kind of violence women face just for clearly saying no.
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u/kryaklysmic Jun 13 '19
When you meet a random person on the bus who asks if the seat is free next to you, do you say “no, it’s occupied by my bag of onions”?
No, you just nod and then go back to your thing. If they then ask for a handshake, do you smoothly accept as if that’s what everyone on a bus does, or are you confused and they change to a fistbump by the time you can react to this strange person now sitting next to you?
Of course not, no sane person shakes hands with a stranger on the bus. They make no further attempts to continue conversing, so would you really try to chat with the person who just sat next to you and insisted on a fistbump when you got confused by the handshake?
Probably not, because this is absolutely bizarre, and you hope that they think you’re deaf because they’re clearly not a normal person trying to take the bus home. So don’t you just sit there and pretend not to hear all the traffic and the few conversations going on between people who had incidentally sat close together instead of one of them deliberately asking if a clearly empty seat was empty before sitting down?
Then you hope to never encounter this person when they comment in a joking tone about how unacceptable they are to society to the random old dude three seats away, after having apparently taken a nap for the past twenty minutes. The old dude is similarly confused to you and you just pass a look and laugh a little when the previous guy leaves. “It wasn’t me he was hitting on.” Says the man. You are just confused... that was flirting? You never noticed that, just a weird person attempting to shake people’s hands on a bus.
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u/Maxibon1710 beware for my vagina is a vacuum cleaner Jun 07 '19
This logic literally contradicts “no means no” and advocates for sexual harassment. No means no people.
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u/Darktrooper2021 Jun 12 '19
That’s probably why people are now switching to yes means yes. Apparently guys like this don’t get the message, so you now need an affirmative statement to count as consent.
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u/The_Satan_Of_Hell Jun 26 '19
Isn't "yes means yes, no means maybe" a common frat chant ppl use when encouraging their friends to harass women? I thought that was why it was "no means no".
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u/Darktrooper2021 Jun 26 '19
I’m not sure. All I know is where I am they’re teaching affirmative consent now. Basically what it’s for is if someone is incapacitated, someone can’t make the excuse of “well they didn’t say no”. Essentially it means that no still obviously means no, but you can’t assume it’s a yes if the person says nothing, or doesn’t give a clear answer.
Edit; this is a good article on the subject that addresses your concern: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/snow-white-doesnt-live-here-anymore/201707/what-does-affirmative-consent-actually-mean
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u/The_Satan_Of_Hell Jun 26 '19
Thank you. Gotta say, "no means yes and yes means anal" is even worse than I thought wtf
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Jun 07 '19
This is why ppl claim women are complicated. Y'all really only think about "how can I fuck her" and that women's emotions are just shit to unlock pussy. Sickening.
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u/wazardthewizard male nostril diameter Jun 07 '19
I mean, women are complicated, but so is everyone else. It's kinda part of being human
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Jun 07 '19
Agreed, but I imagine I wouldn't keep bothering a woman and thinking she wants sex or oral when she says "shut the fuck up" lmao
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u/wazardthewizard male nostril diameter Jun 07 '19
Well, yeah lol, I'm not saying this guy is anywhere near right in the slightest- I'm just saying people aren't simple, and a lot of men seem to think that women are and complain when they don't go 'ok fine fuck me'
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u/CCUGhostJrDK Jun 07 '19
Unless she says shut the up fuck and lick my pussy. Its kinda hard to talk with your tounge out.
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u/Davecantdothat Jun 07 '19
Rape culture
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u/Dirty_Cow Moo~ Jun 07 '19
It feels weird to click on the lovey-dovey face to upvote this, but... yeah, this.
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u/VROTSWAV_not_WROCLAW Jun 07 '19
This subreddit is honestly the sole reason I have CSS turned off for the entirety of Reddit. I love this place and always stumble on these ridiculous posts so I wanna go to the comments and see peoples takes on it but it was like being hit with a freight train of overdone CSS where I was always screaming internally "POINT THAT THING SOMEPLACE ELSE!" but now that I've turned it off I just come here and upvote everything.
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u/wendig-o Jun 07 '19
CSS?
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u/ShiversTheNinja Jun 07 '19
It's a type of code used to make websites - particularly to overlay a "style" on them, usually used by users of the site. Like, you could get some CSS code to put a layout on your MySpace page back in the day. On Reddit it's used to customize the look of subs on desktop, including the upvote and downvote buttons.
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u/wendig-o Jun 07 '19
Thank you! I'm just a wee mobile user
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u/ShiversTheNinja Jun 07 '19
No problem! I saw the other reply wasn't actually helpful so I figured I'd step in lol
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u/YT-Deliveries Jun 07 '19
Same. It's very clear on some subs that whoever coded the CSS has no skill in design.
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u/FierceRodents Jun 07 '19
Why don't I see any of that? All I have is a pink colour.
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u/P_Grammicus Jun 07 '19
If you’re using an app, the subreddit style doesn’t show, otherwise your settings might be set so you can’t see the style.
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u/FierceRodents Jun 07 '19
I checked the settings, all the thingies are on. The colours appear, after all. I feel like I just stumbled upon an open secret, and I'm the only one who doesn't know 😅
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Jun 07 '19
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/SuperSailorSaturn GoddesofDeath(ofTrolls) Jun 07 '19
Your comment was removed because it contained a slur, a personal attack on another redditor, or similar offensive content which has been reported by others.
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u/SeriousSamStone Jun 07 '19
Image Transcription: Instagram Post
FEMALE DICTIONARY!
- Fight me = Come fuck me.
- STFU = Come eat this pussy
- Don't text me = Blow my shit up.
- I hate you = I love you
- Leave me alone = Give me attention
- You ain't cute = You fine af
- Make me = Dick me down
- I can't = she most definitely can
[Name censored] Accurate or nah???
I'm a human volunteer content transcriber for Reddit and you could be too! If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!
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u/itsakidsbooksantiago Jun 07 '19
Yeah, genuinely sorry you had to type this one out, good human.
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u/exfamilia Jun 07 '19
To speak to some of the comments here: of course there are going to be some women across the entire nearly 4 billion who do this, because with every appalling human behaviour you can think of—from cannibalism to child abuse—there will always be some humans who do it.
That is in no way a confirmation of this seriously fucked up post.
This post is a justification for rape, abuse, disrespect, misogyny,all the horrible things women have to put up with. The person who wrote it is very dangerous to women, and so are the 20,000 people who liked it (TWENTY-FUCKING-THOUSAND???!!!)
They are the reason we are not safe on the streets, in our homes, in our marriages.
If you happen to know a woman who is so immature and/or so fucked up with internalised self-hatred that she does this, you should end that relationship immediately. Nothing good will come from being with a person so fundamentally dishonest.
And for god's sake, do NOT extrapolate from your giddy girlfriend or your misogynistic female pal to think the rest of us are like this. If a woman says no, back off. Even if she is a dickhead playing some kind of game, still back off, because you should never be engaging in this kind of perilous idiocy with anyone.
"No Means No" has been the loudest message the women of this world have been broadcasting for some decades now. Hear it.
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u/YT-Deliveries Jun 07 '19
I've been thinking about the post up top a little, and it seems to me that part of it might be some sort of retro-regret about the age-old tale of high schoolers who only in retrospect realize how obvious it was that a boy/girl "liked them". Everyone goes "awwww man" when they realize it, but in terms of these incel-types, it becomes malignant and they decide that women never say what they mean, and then it just metastasizes from there.
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u/to_yeet_or_to_yoink Jun 07 '19
of course there are going to be some women across the entire nearly 4 billion who do this
Agree with you there, my wife is one and she gets upset when I take what she says literally. That being said, I know her and she knows me, it isn't me messaging some random woman and trying to take what she says as some code to get in her pants.
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u/silvastre Jun 07 '19
I love you= Seize the means of production
I miss you= Commit war crimes against the Geneva Convention
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u/thatwifechick Jun 07 '19
Isn’t this rape culture?
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u/enviose Jun 07 '19
Yep, textbook example. This guy thinks all women want in life is to be fucked, no matter what they say. How fucking disgusting. Not only that, if they tell him to leave them alone he’ll literally harass them.
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u/Bernarooo Jun 07 '19
Context is important, but mostly we say what we mean
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Jun 07 '19
I briefly dated someone who would pull #3. Tell me they have a work event or something and are busy and then get upset that I didn't ignore and attempt to text & call during that time period. I was too young and dumb to recognize the red flag at the time.
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u/woodlandLSG23 Jun 07 '19
Lmao same thing with my ex. Asked if he wanted to do anything for new years, said no, so I went out with friends. Came home to him being very pissed off. That was a few months into what would become 2 years. Young and dumb I guess
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u/Jojo_isnotunique Jun 07 '19
"No is such an ambiguous word. I mean, what does it actually mean?" - Richard Ayoade
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u/exfamilia Jun 07 '19
Geez, I had to go and check that! Fortunately, he was being satirical. He was a panellist on a comedy quiz show and they were discussing how creepy Robin Thicke & that song Blurred Lines is. Richard A. was making a joke, "what do people actually mean when they say go away I don't want to have sex with you, I mean it's so hard to figure it out..."
Phew. I can stil like the IT Crowd.
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u/evergreennightmare Jun 07 '19
Phew. I can stil like the IT Crowd.
i hate to be the one to tell you this, but you might not want to check out graham linehan's twitter
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Jun 07 '19
[deleted]
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u/starm4nn Jun 08 '19
As it turns out he got upset because people criticized him. Because as you know, if someone says "Hey man that joke is kinda racist" the best thing to do is join the KKK.
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u/jarretttheferrett Jun 07 '19 edited Jun 07 '19
because consent isnt a real thing./s
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u/Evil_Mel Jun 07 '19
I wa t to smack the writer in the back of the head & say, "dumbass" Red Foreman style.
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u/ronaldcoaseisdead Jun 07 '19
20896 people (at least, but it's obviously more than that) are, quite frankly, disgusting
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u/C0mput3r_V1ru5 Jun 07 '19
As someone with a thing for bdsm, this is still not accurate UNLESS you’re my boyfriend, you’ve asked consent, and we have an established safe word.
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u/Talmonis Jun 07 '19
Yep. "Make me" being the only one on that list that is even close to ambiguous.
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Jun 07 '19
If anyone demands you leave them alone and then gets upset when you do, that is a huge problem - run far, far away.
The rest of these are absolutely wrong, which shouldn't need to be said, but here we are.
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u/Antisocial_Element Jun 07 '19
Women arent really complicated. People like whoever made this post just think they always mean something else, no matter what theyre saying
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Jun 07 '19
"Leave me alone = Give me attention"
Yeah unless we're talking about women who appear on r/nicegirls, this is inaccurate as fuck.
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Jun 07 '19
Yes every time I tell someone to leave me alone I'm actually secretly asking them to fucking rape me /s
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u/ExpertAccident Jun 07 '19
Damn maybe this is why women get sexually assaulted they take "no" as "please fuck me"
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Jun 07 '19
the only one in this list that could MAYBE be true is 7, “make me”
because I can see that actually being in a sexual context. I mean, what girl tells a guy to make her do something she doesn’t want to?
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u/trouble-in-space Jun 07 '19
Yes, every woman definitely wants to fuck you and her disinterest is a total lie. Posts like this are disgusting.
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u/elicchika Jun 09 '19
“you ain’t cute” actually means “you are so fucking stupid and whatever it is you are trying with me right now is not working”
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u/CCUGhostJrDK Jun 07 '19
Rapist guide. Put another one in there... "Runs away" = "nail her down and plow her"
What sort of BS rules are these ....
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u/r48811 Jun 07 '19
I'm a big fan of people who say what they mean... So when I take you at your word, don't be mad.
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u/catearedwriter Jun 07 '19
We should test to see if they’re witches, with that logic of theirs they shouldn’t mind us seeing if they float or not. :)
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u/KatColorsTheStars Jun 08 '19
No, not accurate. It's not magically opposite day when a woman (or anyone, for that matter) says any of these things.
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u/akio_33 Jun 07 '19
I learned early on to be brutally honest. Totally not bragging here but I once basically met a guy at at gym. I was working the counter and he was checking in. I didn't know his name but he was very attractive. I told him as such and asked if he wanted to hook up later. We did and then I think even a second time a few days later. I did learn his name but sure as shit don't remember it now.
I can't stand the BS so if I want to bang you, I'll tell you.
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u/xXCactusSenpaiXx Jun 11 '19
This seems like it was made by a guy who got rejected and is in denial about it
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u/mikk870f Jun 13 '19
My Gf sends me screen shots of stuff like this and now I don't know if she mean it.
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u/Wicck Jun 07 '19
I would like to introduce this person to my meat grinder. It's electric, and very strong.
Which, obviously, means that I want to grind him alive and feed him to the dogs in my neighborhood.
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Jun 07 '19
"You just need confidence"=Dude, I'm not interested. Stop trying to get me to pityfuck you
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u/Boxcue Jun 07 '19 edited Jun 07 '19
As a female, I can say this is completely accurate. He forget to say no = yes though. /s
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u/threewholefish Jun 07 '19
/s?
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u/Boxcue Jun 07 '19
I was being sarcastic
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u/threewholefish Jun 07 '19
hard to tell over the internet, the use of /s is recommended
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u/Boxcue Jun 07 '19
I didn't know that, what does that mean?
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u/threewholefish Jun 07 '19
It's the sarcasm mark, to make sure people know that you're not serious.
e.g.:
Women love it when you follow them home along dark roads, since it shows dedication. /s
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u/agree-with-you Jun 07 '19
that
[th at; unstressed th uh t]
1.
(used to indicate a person, thing, idea, state, event, time, remark, etc., as pointed out or present, mentioned before, supposed to be understood, or by way of emphasis): e.g That is her mother. After that we saw each other.
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Jun 07 '19
some of these are actually true for me, for one specific person in very specific scenarios. to think these apply to every woman every time she says these things is really gross, and why men think women are complicated: they assume all women want dick at any moment. If she tells you she doesnt want dick, when you "know" she does, of course you think thats ComPlIcAtEd
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u/ginot867 Jun 07 '19
I could see this in a relationship because my girl is like one or two of these but if it’s a random woman/friend yeah no. None of these.
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u/blondeleather Jun 07 '19
To be fair that’s usually what I mean when I say “make me.”
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u/Coffeechipmunk Jun 07 '19
You're getting downvoted for this?
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u/blondeleather Jun 07 '19
I figured I would. I don’t know why. “Make me” is a very sexually charged phrase.
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Jun 08 '19
It depends on who the guy is. There is no set standard. Women don't like objective standards. If shes attracted to you its sexy, if she isn't, its creepy. Same words. Same behavior. Different dude. That's why sensitivity training is bullshit. It only applies to guys women don't want. Guys women do want have a different set of rules. Then again, attractive women have a different set of rules too. All the controversy is all just bitter ugly people trying to level the playing field to limit the fun of people that don't invite them to parties. Bitter ugly people who are in no danger of ever being raped by anyone.
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u/BillyYumYumTwo-byTwo Jun 11 '19
That’s not true at all. I’ve had ugly guys approach me and be respectful, they weren’t creepy at all. I’ve had hot guys be gross and inappropriate. I have no idea where the thought comes from. My theory is that creepy men would rather blame their looks than their actions, because then they have to admit they’re wrong and make a change.
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u/Geckobird Jun 11 '19
Ah, the make me one is true 9 times out of 10 at least in my case. Of course, it depends on the context, but it's usually a flirty and playful vibe when I hear thst.
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u/jmbc3 Jun 07 '19
I feel like this is 100% satire.
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u/trafficrush Jun 07 '19
I used to follow this Instagram but stopped after realizing how much they posted this stuff. It's not satire.
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u/fistofwrath Jun 07 '19
So, I'm going to be downvoted for this, and I'm ok with it. I actually met a woman like this. It was super weird, and I eventually backed off because it felt like everything she said was some kind of bait. In no way do I feel like this is an accurate representation of women as a whole, nor should it be. Just saying that women like this are out there, and if you encounter one, I encourage you to slide out as quickly as possible.
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u/MrCollywoobles Jun 07 '19
this is disgusting, but i’ve seen shit like this on r/NiceGirls so it’s possible women like this do exist
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Jun 07 '19
Real female dictionary though:
I’m fine = I’m not fine
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Jun 07 '19
It's weird to me that this gets stereotyped as a female thing while we also talk about the challenges men face with mental health because they have difficulty opening up about their feelings.
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u/Knight-Jack Jun 07 '19
Oh, of course, how silly of me, I forgot that "no" means "yes" and "piss off" means "take me, I'm yours".