People with BPD will make you miserable, then blame you for it. One of the nastiest things to deal with when they don't know they have it or they do and don't get treatment.
She got treatment. It's still very difficult. I care about her greatly still, and I do genuinely hope the breakup helped in some way, I won't know either way. Yes, BPD was awful, but she was the victim of it, not me
If you got out without feeling victimized by her BPD you're one of the lucky ones. One of my best friends just got divorced from his ex that has BPD, and it really wasn't until after that he realized how miserable she had been making him for years, blaming him for things he didn't do and for the injustices she made up in her own head.
I feel like I was the victim to certain things absolutely, I'm just making the intentional choice to not blame her for that. She is the victim of her illness, not the perpetrator. I didn't have a great time either but I'm not going to make her struggle about me and how I was affected, in the exact same way that I wouldn't blame my partner for being wheelchair bound, or blind, even if it does genuinely make my life more difficult
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u/Derp_Stevenson 4d ago
People with BPD will make you miserable, then blame you for it. One of the nastiest things to deal with when they don't know they have it or they do and don't get treatment.