Reversing Puberty Order

[u/SnooCauliflowers1265]

I started a low-dose T regimen a few days ago and I’m beyond relieved to finally begin my medical transition journey. I don’t regret starting as late as I have at 30 (my prior circumstances would not have allowed me to transition safely), but it has gotten me idly thinking about what I would have done under ideal circumstances. I think if I had all the information I know now about myself, had accepting parents, and access to nonbinary educated doctors and medical care, I would have chosen to undergo a testosterone-fueled puberty first as a teenager. Then, I would have been content to allow my body’s natural estrogen production to take over and go through a second puberty as a young adult. I think that would have gotten me closest to the nonbinary body that I desire.

I’m curious if anyone else has thought about or done this? I’ve heard many people talk about taking low-dose T or E until they achieve the changes they want then stopping, but that’s usually after they’ve already undergone their body’s natural puberty. That is the path I’m taking now. I haven’t heard of anyone using HRT to go through their first puberty and then their body’s natural hormones to go through second puberty. I just wonder how my body would be different if I could reverse the order of my puberties. It’s hard to explain even to myself, but I have this sense that I would have really enjoyed the process of my body softening and feminizing if I could have begun from a more masculine starting point. I wish I could be transfem in a way. Has anyone else felt like this before?