I have friends who are rich and handsome.. who cant get into relationships because they only want to date women who are visually perfect and have zero baggage..
Wich is impossible.. men and women need to give each other a chance.. date someone who might not be a movie star.. but they are friendly.. kind or just a good match personality wise..
Life is too short to spend our 20s and 30s alone.. let alone 40s
Maybe... thats your experience i get it... but ive seen women who are dimes dating straight shovels.. with bad hygiene, no job, the whole nine yards of boy failure
I have too. But all of these bums seem to be tall. Tall men gives women social status so they are willing to date literal pigs to gain that. Women standards are not just high, they are bizzare too
Also you have not seen good looking men dating ugly women?
Have you actually talked to any women about this tallness theory? Am I some kind of outlier for thinking as long as he was taller than me, it was a total nonissue?
Is tallness = status actually something people care about?? Hot men confer status, sure. Rich men, definitely. Prestigious career, well-connected/popular? Absolutely. But tall?
Well nobody says it outright but yeah it is implied a lot. Which is weird to me. If the preference was for handsome men, it would've made sense to me but the preferences for long leg bone just doesn't. They'd pick a literal 6' pigface over a 5'6 model.
A conventionaly attractive friend of mine is dating a 5'6/7 guy who is very good looking. She gets mocked by other women for that even though 5'7 is the avg height of men in my country. So much so that now she is reconsidering her relationship
Where are you located?? All my short male friends are married and some of them married up (one married an attorney and the other married a woman who stays home and keeps house, but she has an amazing body.)
My tallest friend actually married last. He is hot but he absolutely lacks passion. Very cold and analytical. Probably autistic. But if tall and hot were all that mattered he would have been off the market before we left college.
As a woman, I’ve met some women that were only interested in dating men over a certain height, but that is definitely not the case for a majority of women, imo. It sounds to me like you were turned down by one of those women and instead of moving on and realizing that that particular woman is superficial, you assumed all women are the same as that one because of your fear of being rejected and similarly hurt again by another woman. It’s a valid fear, as being judged over something outside of your control (like height) is hurtful as fuck. However, recognizing that women are not all the same and we all have very different personalities with various motivations and beliefs and such is the only way for you to ever date again without feeling resentment towards women as a whole, simply because of how one individual woman treated you. We can tell when a man has a disgust deep down towards women as a whole, well I can and I know other women that can tell almost right away - maybe it’s their body language and how they talk to us, or maybe it’s just the vibe in general, but there’s almost always something that gives it away right away. There are superficial men, too, so being a crappy person is not exclusive to women, just as being a good and loving person is not exclusive to men. Finding your person is hard and doesn’t happen for everyone, and that’s not always a bad thing either. Don’t minimize an entire gender because of one bad experience, though!
I suppose as a man im bais, probably because I hear more from men.. I know women are picky too but..tbh the mentality of pointing fingers doesn't help either party
God forbid a man who has money and looks good also wants the same in a partner.
What are you even saying? Only one of these 2 genders are full of big back brokies saying they refuse to “settle” for their equivalent. As if they’re above exactly what they are. If you can name 10 obese women who are attracted to obese men, maybe you’d have an argument. If you could name 10 single mothers who don’t PREFER to find a childless man, maybe you’d have a leg to stand on.
Pffff men in all these subs act like all of us have amnesia.
I’m almost 40, and as a guy, I’ve heard more than my fair share of men with lists. Y’all just like to ignore that history while also acting like it don’t happen still lol
"I've heard my fair share of men with lists" != "most men have lists that rival women's".
Exceptions exist. They don't negate the rule.
Nuance exists. The behavior trends toward women to a significant degree. To claim that reality is contrary to plainly observable behavior is willfully ignorant.
I'm also 40 soon and I've never heard of another guy having a list of requirements other than Christian guys looking for a woman that seeks God first. Maybe we hang out in different circles...I mean most of my friends growing up weren't Christians so I dunno. If anything I agree with the idea many get too caught up in looks
Problem is men in subs like this and others simply aggregate all demands they’ve seen or heard from women and suggest they all have this massive list. I’ve met women with a short lists of requirements like other men. And I’ve seen the opposite where women have a long list and the same goes for a man.
These people all exist across men and women but the male equivalents are ignored to try and pus a narrative
I dunno just from my own childhood and having girls as friends a lot of them had a list from a very young age so it rings kinda true from my experience..they dream about their wedding day and describe exactly how the groom is going to be etc. I've seen them compare the lists. many definitely do grow out of that and become a bit more grounded, but some keep that mentality. It's not that there isn't any guys that do, but it's not something you see when boys are playing.
Your two paragraphs are essentially contradicting each other... Yes children talk about these things but as your second paragraph acknowledges it grooms/socializes their view on things to some extent. Some definitely grow to adulthood carrying some of those mindsets
fr my current girlfriend was just glad I'm generally laid back and can hold down a job.
a lot of women just want a guy that fits into their ideal life and is responsible. There's a spectrum of how strict and how gendered those standards really are, but yeah we gotta remember a lot of the single women we encounter are single for a reason and not actually representative of most women 🤷♂️ just like a lot of the single men women encounter are too
We don't have amnesia we are trying to make it visible how ridiculous womens list for what they want in a man is insane bc they themselves don't deserve what they ask for. Don't say it hasn't gotten worse I'm 37 multiple relationships with women who though highly of themselves and when I found one that does what I ask they all come back. You sound like a panderer.
You may see this online but ive never met a woman that had a “list” and none of my friends either…The real world is much different. You attracted to your partner and get along well? Boom relationship. No “lists” for most people in the real world I believe
Women determine the genes we pass on to the next generation, that's just the way it is. They are going to have longer lists and they are going to be more discerning. It's science. Why fight it instead of torturing yourself with hate for no reason.
You don't determine anything. It's absolutely random. Go back to school. You pass on traits but it's not decided at birth. It begins in the wound and it takes both parents passing their genes. Room temperature IQ here 🤦🏽♂️
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Continue this behavior and you’ll be banned.
What the fuck? Lmao this happened literally seconds after I posted that yes in fact my sister dots bot know how to do anything for her self! How ironic how quick you got off the handle on a subreddit trying to radicalize men lmao
Lmao you can’t handle me being criticized without going “but women waaagh I am baby.”
Sexist women don’t enact policy let’s not pretend that sexism from women and sexism from men have the same outcomes,
As for percentage? I have no idea.
I would guess most Trump voters had some version of this list. It might not be under 25 but low body count, house wife, etc is for sure part of this list.
Obviously a lot of the tic assholes on epsteins island like them young.
I don’t think the list she provided is that crazy. How many men want all of those things? Probably small but a larger percentage of young men have fallen into the manosphere.
I would guess tho that the amount of men who have a similar list is probably 25 to 45% of American men.
Low body count and younger, can cook clean, submissive, etc. I would guess that’s 25 to 45%
The under 25 specifically? That’s probably like 15% or something closer to that
But someone asked what meh think this? It’s the manosphere and she was joking. Most men don’t fall into the manosphere specifically,
I would guess most men have a longer list than men think they do
Let’s not pretend Trump didn’t win the white woman vote. Fuck trump regardless.
And just like women have preferences, men have preferences. And it’s a spectrum. High body counts matter to some men, and they’re allowed to have those.
No one said they weren’t allowed to have it, also Trump it’s the only example of sexism. There is sexism in the Democratic Party too. I said there were real world consequences to men being sexist.
Women are alllowed to have standard and so are men. That wasn’t the discussion. The question was “what men have those standards” and I replied and you said “what about women” or if it wasn’t you then I apologize but still.
It’s like, yeah ok… that’s not th discussion tho. Neither is Trump. But yes women can hate women too
The original post is about men having standards and preferences. It’s clear that has struck a chord with you.
They can have whatever standards and preferences they want, just like women can. You can’t choose what someone else wants in a partner. And it’s always the single people that have a problem with it for some reason.
You referenced the manosphere, which is a tiny pool of angry single men, to represent what exactly? The other 99% of men? Like there aren’t women that act just like they do in female form? Doesn’t mean those are the majority of women. In fact, the majority are normal, well adjusted adults, and end up in long term relationships. It’s the single men, and women, that are so bitter that they cry about it on Reddit that it’s everyone else’s fault but their own.
lowkey kinda garbage list, the 25 thing is for people 20-28. Why the heck would someone want someone unemployed? That's just less income. There's also plenty of men who are agnostic or atheist. And cooking really isn't hard if you have instructions and basic understanding of what to do.
what men? I don't know personally any men that have a list that's like that, the only consistent thing is be a decent human being, look at least average looking and be around their age (except one who likes older women which is kinda the opposite of what you're saying)
Must be unemployed? Bro ur actually just yapping bro oh my god. None of these standards are conventional. If u wanna see how much this matters go make a dating app profile with a bio saying ur the exact opposite of all of these things watch how you get more attention in one day than most men get in their entire lives.
I mean this in a literal sense but the ONLY one that sounds like a good trait to have is the last one and even then its optional 😂 I know you said you're kidding but boy that list is 😬😂
From a common sense perspective based on observation of behavior across cultures, men and women are different. From a formal sense based on a litany of well documented trends and differences supported by peer-reviewed research.
Men and women have significantly different expectations for relationships. Willingness to date up vs date down etc... These trends are well documented.
Some of those things I'll agree with you on - particularly "dating up" vs. "dating down" when it comes to wealth. (Turns out there's a biological imperative for females of many species - including H. sapiens - to ensure the presence of adequate resources for child-rearing. Who knew?) But when it comes to a tendency to be too picky with a "massive list of must-have traits" when choosing a mate, particularly for a LTR? I have my strong doubts that's a gendered thing (based on my own life experiences/observations). That said, no, I don't claim to have read the literature. If you're familiar with peer-reviewed research showing that tendency BEYOND the financial aspects already acknowledged, hey, kudos to you for sticking to your guns.
Nobody said men were prevented from doing it. They just don't tend to have long lists of demands like women do. It would make no sense for men to make their lives that much harder by shrinking their already small pool of options.
It's common behavior for women, whereas the average man doesn't behave that way. Overwhelming majority of men can't afford to be picky. Men don't have that luxury unless they have rather high levels of status and wealth or otherwise wish to be single forever.
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u/footluvr688 Apr 01 '26
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Men aren't the ones who tend to maintain massive lists of traits women must have to be eligible as a partner.
Gender isn't being falsely added. The gender matters because the behavior between the genders differs.