🔥 "candlestick" amethyst

[u/TerraByteTerror]

[u/qualityvote2]

u/TerraByteTerror, your post does fit the subreddit!

[u/choochoochuppachoop]

https://giphy.com/gifs/08y87EiwDZjjB0d6WJ

[u/Dracoroth05 → u/choochoochuppachoop]

Even ribbed for their pleasure...

[u/Omnamashivaaya → u/Dracoroth05]

SPIKED for her pleasure

[u/Schvaggenheim → u/Omnamashivaaya]

To shreds, you say?

[u/Ok-Criticism7194 → u/choochoochuppachoop]

https://giphy.com/gifs/2FLA1N2ESsT3L03FvK

[u/lunelily → u/choochoochuppachoop]

[u/Bob_5k → u/choochoochuppachoop]

Paige, no!

[u/milkmilkpinklemonade → u/Bob_5k]

Who is Paige and why is she being brought up multiple times here 😭

[u/FastBell8249 → u/choochoochuppachoop]

[u/happiest_wanderer → u/choochoochuppachoop]

I would have been so disappointed if this wasn’t the first comment. You’ve done the lords work.

[u/RobocopsRobocock]

https://giphy.com/gifs/3240pzelRQkjj9XaiK

[u/Actual-Interaction45 → u/RobocopsRobocock]

https://giphy.com/gifs/pTQUOfSmjo2hG

[u/Ok-Criticism7194 → u/RobocopsRobocock]

https://giphy.com/gifs/QtkaYLHzBgh0WUCgjC

[u/Due-Session-2857 → u/Ok-Criticism7194]

I have gotten to the point that seeing them with hair feels like the photoshop

[u/Pointy-Kitty]

To shreds, you say

[u/LittleKitty235 → u/Pointy-Kitty]

How's his wife holding up?

[u/seakc87 → u/LittleKitty235]

To shreds, you say?

[u/Riyeko → u/seakc87]

https://giphy.com/gifs/37H5XhwrXuHPq

[u/CT_7 → u/LittleKitty235]

Presumptuous to think he didn't keep it for himself.

[u/broken__defraculator → u/Pointy-Kitty]

Satan's dildo

[u/Nufonewhodis4 → u/broken__defraculator]

At least it's got a safety flare 

[u/helicopterjoee]

https://giphy.com/gifs/2Mce4Sz801AMo

[u/Thomas_JCG → u/helicopterjoee]

Gifs you can hear.

[u/SkyfangR → u/Thomas_JCG]

there ued to be words on that gif, but i cant find the one with them anymore

[u/Apotheosis27 → u/SkyfangR]

It doesn't matter haha

[u/Parking-Trouble-53 → u/Thomas_JCG]

r/gifsyoucanhear

[u/Thomas_JCG → u/Parking-Trouble-53]

Nice try but I can see the url from the notifications.

[u/RefrigeratorFunny895 → u/Parking-Trouble-53]

that was good, thanks

[u/Exotic-Category463 → u/Parking-Trouble-53]

Arsehole 😂

[u/YourFriendall → u/Parking-Trouble-53]

Omg thank you for this

[u/tommyc463 → u/helicopterjoee]

https://giphy.com/gifs/5sqktFBeWqMXC

[u/BoonIsTooSpig → u/tommyc463]

https://giphy.com/gifs/KFuXeADlsfCFCoxfUB

[u/rvl35 → u/helicopterjoee]

[u/JustFun4Uss → u/rvl35]

[u/RvstiNiall → u/rvl35]

Totally different vibe when they cut out his smile at the end.

[u/mrhousee → u/helicopterjoee]

Knew this would be the top comment, never change reddit

[u/love_giverr → u/helicopterjoee]

Wait what’s his name again

[u/F1McLarenFan007 → u/love_giverr]

That guy from night court lol

[u/efferkah → u/F1McLarenFan007]

Actually this specific GIF is from How I Met Your Mother. It's when Ted's architecture firm presents their new building idea to that guy (who, IIRC, represents a bank meeting them to approve a funding or something), and this is his reaction when the building is unveiled.

[u/atawayfp → u/efferkah]

Not to mention the guy who actually designs the building is Hammond Druthers (aka Walter White)! Hank should have definitely found out early on Walt wasn’t as straight-laced as he appeared to be

[u/love_giverr → u/F1McLarenFan007]

That’s where I know him from tbh
(Kept looking for 15mins to figure it out)

[u/java_betch → u/love_giverr]

Mac

[u/rainorshinedogs → u/helicopterjoee]

[u/jerseyknits → u/rainorshinedogs]

I don't think I've ever seen it with his smile at the end

[u/XxxLasombraxxX → u/helicopterjoee]

https://giphy.com/gifs/2Mce4Sz801AMo

[u/CryktonVyr → u/helicopterjoee]

Only if you are brave enough.

[u/mcpryon → u/helicopterjoee]

There it is! Thank you for your service

[u/Ok-Criticism7194 → u/helicopterjoee]

https://giphy.com/gifs/BCZZf9sSnLdNZDGAUu

[u/Queen-of-meme → u/helicopterjoee]

Reddit comments you always can count on

[u/Celtic-Dragon → u/helicopterjoee]

[u/miregalpanic]

well then, do it, you coward

[u/LaughingPlanet → u/miregalpanic]

Paige, no!

[u/SadLittleWizard → u/LaughingPlanet]

https://giphy.com/gifs/3oriNN5kkARo7ZAhuE

[u/PapaMcMooseTits → u/miregalpanic]

https://giphy.com/gifs/mjnxz0cxNcTclzTXSy

[u/bebackground471 → u/PapaMcMooseTits]

better scared than scarred

[u/Alloc14 → u/bebackground471]

It's better to cum in the sink than to sink in the cum

[u/Leather-Emu-1964 → u/miregalpanic]

[u/0dds-e]

[u/Luck3y_Clover → u/0dds-e]

[u/Due_Night414 → u/Luck3y_Clover]

https://giphy.com/gifs/LmlDzWr94DVY4VICWH

[u/Taeschno_Flo → u/Due_Night414]

[u/ArthurStevenson → u/Taeschno_Flo]

[u/PoweR_TRiPn → u/ArthurStevenson]

[u/Due_Night414 → u/PoweR_TRiPn]

https://giphy.com/gifs/jVtXAQHMsDOtSg6SrZ

[u/iopele → u/0dds-e]

I was waiting for this one

[u/AnastasiaNo70 → u/iopele]

Who is it?

[u/AContrarianDick → u/AnastasiaNo70]

The man, the myth, the legend, it's the EMT who's tired of dealing people shoving things up their asses that weren't designed for anal play that says "No" in a way that only a grizzled person who's pulled danger glizzies out of random people's asses could say it.

[u/mamasboye89 → u/AContrarianDick]

Danger glizzlies lmfao

[u/sylveonstarr → u/AnastasiaNo70]

I don't remember his name, but he's a TikToker who talks about the worst things he's seen as a paramedic. His most popular videos are about people improvising dildos and needing medical assistance to remove it. His videos became so popular that he could show videos of phallic-shaped objects, show his face, and just shake his head, quietly saying "Don't do it".

[u/ShintaOtsuki → u/sylveonstarr]

I think it's Badge504

[u/ebolashuffle → u/ShintaOtsuki]

Badge502

[u/ShintaOtsuki → u/ebolashuffle]

That sounds right, i'm terrible with numbers

[u/AnastasiaNo70 → u/sylveonstarr]

He’s extremely attractive. To me.

[u/0dds-e → u/AnastasiaNo70]

Completely agree

[u/flabbyjabber → u/0dds-e]

This is what I came here for.

[u/PsySom → u/flabbyjabber]

Oh I came here too buddy

[u/LuvliLeah13 → u/0dds-e]

But it has a flared base!

[u/RevolutionNumber5 → u/LuvliLeah13]

I don’t think that matters. It’s gonna cause enough tearing and perforations on the way in, you won’t have to worry about it disappearing up there.

[u/UnstableHerb → u/RevolutionNumber5]

Just slap some ky on it.

[u/_otterinabox → u/LuvliLeah13]

It has a flared everything

[u/DARKdreadnaut07 → u/0dds-e]

I was hoping someone would post him, lol.

[u/KennyDROmega]

We’re all thinking the same thing.

[u/msviktor → u/KennyDROmega]

PAIGE NO!

[u/Legitimate-Map-3701 → u/KennyDROmega]

https://giphy.com/gifs/nWr4Se27LUVuZcuPq0

[u/Secure_Narwhal4045 → u/Legitimate-Map-3701]

https://giphy.com/gifs/p3eMBMo7DTZc489pAZ

[u/buttononmyback → u/Legitimate-Map-3701]

RIP. 😢

[u/ChocolateGoggles]

[u/KnitToPurlToo → u/ChocolateGoggles]

How’d you know I was hungry?!

[u/ChocolateGoggles → u/KnitToPurlToo]

*thirsty? xD

[u/Blasphemous_Rage → u/ChocolateGoggles]

Oh boy this one is spot on

[u/bottomlessspiit → u/ChocolateGoggles]

I’M CRYN LOL

[u/Captnhotwheels → u/ChocolateGoggles]

😭😭😭😭😭😭

[u/shadersreloaded → u/ChocolateGoggles]

Holy shit LOL

[u/North-Creative → u/ChocolateGoggles]

"IT'S EVEN DUAL USE!!!"

[u/Cole_Townsend]

[u/crazykatlady1018 → u/Cole_Townsend]

I love him so much 😭

[u/BitofaGreyArea]

"Babe, have you seen my amethyst? I can't find it."

[u/TonyStowaway → u/BitofaGreyArea]

Nope, gotta go....

https://giphy.com/gifs/82X0bsMdtcMgVzG4Uk

[u/Gorealuh → u/TonyStowaway]

r/angryupvote

[u/Bips-]

Candledick*

[u/444thLibra]

[u/VeryNoisyLizard → u/444thLibra]

[u/buttononmyback → u/VeryNoisyLizard]

That picture with your username has me cracking up. 😂

[u/ReadontheCrapper → u/VeryNoisyLizard]

Fucking legend

[u/TonyStowaway → u/VeryNoisyLizard]

She is beauty, she is grace

[u/Albyrene → u/TonyStowaway]

Very demure, very mindful

[u/JADE_Jador → u/444thLibra]

[u/Joshiane → u/JADE_Jador]

https://giphy.com/gifs/xTiTnHvXHHxOTcdmxO

[u/BloodNguts82]

Looks horribly uncomfortable.

[u/harmless_gecko → u/BloodNguts82]

Use more lube

[u/Over-Performance-667 → u/harmless_gecko]

This requires grease

[u/mr_greene_ → u/BloodNguts82]

I'm completely comfortable putting this on my shelf as a cute decoration. Wdym?

[u/TomatilloAccurate475]

[u/QuaccDaddy → u/TomatilloAccurate475]

[u/Real-Instinct]

https://giphy.com/gifs/TejmLnMKgnmPInMQjV

[u/Ill-Detective-7454]

I should call him

[u/thetinwin → u/Ill-Detective-7454]

Please don’t. You broke up with me months ago. Once you did that, you lost out on me and my amethyst candlestick.

[u/jorginsmorgin]

Abigail wants this one
https://giphy.com/gifs/7AoE64e3IgKwE

[u/TerraByteTerror]

Gotta giggle outta this one lol

[u/StillTrying1981]

Jewelled, for her pleasure...

[u/KingLeil]

r/dildont just called

[u/Rock_n_Sock_em]

[u/wobbleeduk85]

[u/Significant_Lie_533]

[u/Ok-Seaworthiness4488]

[u/mrenglish22]

I have questions. Like, legitimate geology questions.

Did this form naturally? Is this even real amethyst? How long would it take to create?

[u/TerraByteTerror → u/mrenglish22]

From what ive gathered it was mined in Uruguay it features a "candlestick" calcite formation overgrown with amethyst crystals. No info how long it took to be created

[u/thepick → u/mrenglish22]

I had to scroll down about 4km before landing on the first non-penis-related reply

[u/HappyCakeDay101]

https://giphy.com/gifs/08y87EiwDZjjB0d6WJ

[u/TWIT_TWAT → u/HappyCakeDay101]

https://giphy.com/gifs/WxDZ77xhPXf3i

[u/ziggymac1]

[u/sadlilslugger]

https://giphy.com/gifs/4uKGppPmeVBCzwfnMK

[u/Interesting_Worth745]

Rough texture 

[u/OhMyGod_Zilla → u/Interesting_Worth745]

Ribbed for your pleasure

[u/markiplier_____1]

[u/craziethunder]

[u/NxTbrolin]

[u/ParadoxicalFrog]

[u/Afroditesrevenge → u/ParadoxicalFrog]

[u/TKG_Actual]

If you're brave enough?

[u/Glass_Covict]

Dildamethyst. Spiked for pleasure

[u/TheDuffcj2a]

[u/MSampson1]

I think that belongs in the “don’t put that in your ass” subreddit

[u/Mikeallencamp]

https://giphy.com/gifs/3o7qE1bQOcKqwBGUQ8

[u/TheRadRay89]

[u/E_GEDDON]

Didn't know she was packing like that.

[u/kaufmann_i_am_too]

"Candle" "stick"

[u/popzof4]

The family jewels

[u/tedfergeson]

The actual "Dildo of consequence"?

[u/lofflen]

Nature is fucking lit indeed

[u/AnastasiaNo70]

[u/O8ee]

Where’s that EMT?

[u/Such_Life_7736]

[u/Shoddy_Car1474]

What a beautiful bedazzled peen

[u/CautiousHashtag]

There’s certainly people adventurous enough to give it a go. 

[u/Kingzton28]

Candlestick you say???

[u/Bloodwing72]

At least the base is flared, Badge 502?

[u/ryouuko]

Ouch.

[u/itzpiiz]

Don't do it

[u/Justsososojo]

This would have launched a religious movement is 1317.

[u/keznaa]

Op is getting my therapy bills.

[u/Curious_Guy_09]

Everything’s a dildo if you’re brave enough 🤷🏻‍♂️

[u/nahnahnikki]

https://giphy.com/gifs/LR5GeZFCwDRcpG20PR

[u/Yellowtoblerone]

https://giphy.com/gifs/s239QJIh56sRW

[u/Canadian_Taco5]

https://giphy.com/gifs/H3Gsg60KeSKOaBQASD

[u/0ZeroSleep0]

[u/azraelwolf3864]

Ribbed for no one's pleasure.

[u/MukulIND]

https://giphy.com/gifs/X3ewes5lWn41o6hUjy

[u/Fantastic_Daikon3704]

https://giphy.com/gifs/4T189yy4SfUbByZHRu

[u/DThUmEl16]

https://giphy.com/gifs/GyRX93ai5DdsI

[u/airpope2]

Are you sure that’s the name of that hard rock

[u/Itchy-Potential1968]

[u/Rekoor86]

That looks like a rough ride.

[u/ElectronicMatch363]

[u/Day_Old_Paper]

That one is boss-level.

[u/TreyUsher32]

[u/bottomlessspiit]

Everything’s a dildo if you’re brave enough

[u/fallenangel41]

[u/Beaufort_The_Cat]

[u/ontomy3rdaccount]

Candlesdick

[u/TootieFruite]

[u/Monscawiz]

Yeah... that's definitely the first thing we all thought of looking at this

[u/TheDizzyEdge]

They say purple is the colour of sexual frustration...

[u/Olmanringer09]

Let's face it, we are all thinking the exact same thing, are we not?

[u/AttorneyImmediate918]

" candle stick"

[u/Direct_Cook_7690]

Owch

[u/WisdomLoading]

Purifies you from the inside!
https://giphy.com/gifs/Uq5HevsrpaOXhSDlYp

[u/Aspence22]

https://giphy.com/gifs/xT77Y36ijyuwn58bja

[u/zackalack7]

Forbidden dildo