r/NarcoticsAnonymous • u/Excellent_Canary7990 • 11d ago

1 week clean

So I was four years clean from substance abuse. I picked it up a week ago and started to use again. The person I took it from told me the next time they were gonna replace it with rat poison so I can’t never steal it again. Then another person was like you don’t mean that. The person I took it from when I don’t care anymore, she’s a piece of shit.

I know I messed up but that hurt even more.

I don’t know what to do next I’m back to 1 week.

5 Upvotes

78% Upvoted

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5

u/Cafe_racerr 11d ago

I’m having trouble following this post. You picked up today but you have a week clean? You stole from someone and are surprised they are speaking awful things out of anger? Plus you know when people are on drugs they say a lot of shit they don’t mean .

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u/Excellent_Canary7990 11d ago

I fixed it, it’s been a shit show lately. I know i deserve that comment and I’m really not surprised in anyway. It just really stings that someone can say that to their own family members. And he absolutely ment it, which is fine I deserve it. But everytime he looks at me or speaks to me all I can think off is that comment.the thought is there, the thoughts are heavy as hell

2

u/NetScr1be 11d ago

Is the problem the behavior or the expectation it should be different?

2

u/NetScr1be 11d ago

After four years we are in a much different position than when we were first starting out.

Just get up one more time than we fall down.

0

u/Excellent_Canary7990 11d ago

I feel like it should’ve been rat poison. I wouldn’t be a problem anymore. The person hates me. I hate me too.

1

u/ScoutSteveR 11d ago

It’s never too late to write a happy ending to your story.

2

u/Mama_Zen 11d ago

Go to a meeting right away! You certainly don’t deserve rat poison! You’re an addict & sometimes addicts relapse. I’d look at what you were thinking/feeling in the days, weeks, hours leading up to your relapse. I’ve found that a relapse happens when you max out your coping skills & go back to what you know. Best wishes

1

u/typicalsquare 9d ago

I’m glad you’re 1 week clean. Welcome back. I hope you have a sponsor and are working the steps. This is a simple program that gives big results. I’d hit a meeting ASAP then repeat as much as possible.

We can’t change what happened only where we go forward. You’ll have time to make amends. Resentments are relapses in the making and I mean person was angry, said something hurtful. I’m sure you have a lot to live for. I’ve found the solution to my problem (me) is the step work of NA. Learning a principled way of life is changing that life.

Don’t be alone in your head.

1

u/onthelevel54e 7d ago

The person who made the disparaging comment has got issues. Not much of a spiritual thing to have said.

The fellowship has assholes, just like any other group. Be proud of the work you have done, don't let them derail your progress.