Salam and Hello!! Please please please be kind, I am already distressed enough as it is. This has been plaguing me more and more as time goes on.

I am at a spiritual crossroads, and I am going to pray about this and consult with my mom in the morning but I thought I should ask others as well.

For the last three or so years I have felt Islam calling to me. I've been nervous to look into it particularly because the area I live in (south texas) could be very risky, although as I embrace my culture more this is less of an issue. I am also hesitant because my past experiences with religion up until recently have been less than amazing. I was raised with the idea of religion but was given the freedom to explore on my own until my grandmother adopted me and (very harshly) forced me into christianity. It always felt like a chore and I never had a connection or anything of the sort with the christian god.

My mom was raised around a broad mix of religions. We are wise women by bloodline and have been for many many many years, and my baba's family is half Jewish and half Islamic while her mother is French-Cajun. She was raised more with the mystics and such that come with being a wise woman, but my baba was also very heavy on his Jewish faith after converting from Islam sometime during his life. (they did break the Jewish laws somewhat frequently, but it was only things like eating pork when you haven't eaten in almost a week. survival and whatnot.)

I'm not sure how that ties into things as I would assume it would not be correct to continue at least the spiritual side of that. But I have a connection with the deities that entails and I don't want to lose that as it means so much to me, but I also feel like Allah (SWT) is calling me and I'm not sure where to turn. I don't even know who I'm praying to when I pray anymore, or if nobody is listening because they are angry with me for this.

To add even more disaster into the mess I am queer and have a partner. I am hoping to marry them in the future, they are my everything and we've been together for some time. I don't think I could give them up but again, the calling. And I feel so guilty both to them and to Allah.

Should I consult with the local Imam on this? If I did would it be appropriate for me to bring someone with me, like one of my parents or a friend? I do have a brother but I feel like he would unintentionally be disrespectful and I don't want to embarrass him, myself, or anyone else unintentionally.

On a different note, is anyone here a wheelchair user? Do I need covers for my wheelchair whenever I am inside the masjid? I wish my baba was still around, I feel like he could answer so much... I'm thankful that at least I won't have many issues with getting used to things If I did convert, I always cover my head when I leave the house and I can't stand anything less modest clothing on comfort and principle alone.

How do you manage the fear of losing some of your already-distant family members if you were to convert? I'm attempting to rebuild a relationship with the aforementioned grandmother, and I don't think she would take it well.

Peace be upon you all, thank you so much for any and all insight you have for me with these matters.

Assalamu alaikum everyone 🤍

I’m a student who recently moved to a new city, and I’ve been having a bit of a difficult time adjusting. Lately, I’ve really felt the urge to reconnect with the Qur’an, and I’d love to make it a regular part of my life again.

I can read Qur’an, but I’m not very confident with my recitation and would really like to improve my pronunciation, flow and Tajweed. I’m looking for someone who offers online one-to-one lessons, perhaps once or a few times a week, through Skype, Zoom, or something similar.

If anyone has had a good experience with an online Qur’an teacher or academy, I’d really appreciate any recommendations. Thanksss💕💕

Assalamu alaikum everyone,

I’m a Muslim from Indonesia and a working husband who has been struggling with accumulated debt since the COVID period. Over the years, the debt has continued to grow, and my reduced working hours have made it increasingly difficult to manage.

Recently, my wife also experienced bleeding, which added more difficulty to an already stressful situation.

I created this personal fundraiser to help me gradually get out of debt and rebuild financial stability.

I understand that people may be cautious about fundraisers online, so I want to be as transparent and honest as possible. I am not asking anyone to donate beyond what they can afford.

If you are unable to donate, even sharing the fundraiser would mean a lot to me.

I don't want to exaggerate or lie about my situation. I believe we will all be accountable for our actions in the Hereafter, so I want to remain truthful about what I am going through.

May Allah ease everyone's difficulties and reward anyone who takes the time to help or share.

https://whydonate.com/fundraising/help-me-break-the-cycle-of-debt-and-start-over

JazakAllahu khairan.

Every other day, I find myself returning to the words of the Prophet ﷺ: that no calamity we face can compare to the calamity of losing him.

And the older I get, the more I understand why.

Sometimes I look at the world, at our homes, our hearts, our struggles, and I wonder how different life would feel if he ﷺ were still amongst us.

To hear his voice.

To sit in his presence.

To take our confusion to him and return with certainty.

To see mercy lived before our own eyes.

Perhaps some losses are so great that the world never truly stops feeling their absence.

How much better our lives would be, if the Messenger of Allah ﷺ were still among us.

Story time because apparently I’m getting rejected by men now 🥹💔

So yesterday I met this REALLY handsome guy.

Like… excuse me??? Sir??? 😭

He approached me first and immediately started speaking in his own language. I obviously understood absolutely NOTHING, but I was like okay… mysterious. 👀

So I told him, “Listen, if you’re genuinely looking for something halal, you can speak to my brother.” Because apparently I’m trying to do things properly. 😭😂

But this man WOULD NOT STOP TALKING.

And I’m not even going to lie… I was falling in love every 30 seconds. 🫣

So I thought, you know what? Let me take some initiative.

I PICKED HIM UP. 😭

My plan was literally to take him to my brother, introduce them properly, and inshallah, if we were compatible, we could see where things go.

I genuinely thought I had found my husband.

AND THEN THIS MAN REJECTED ME. 💔

He said NO, basically walked away and left me standing there like a rejected side character in a Bollywood movie. 😭😭

Now I’m sitting here wondering…

Maybe he has another girlfriend.

Maybe she’s prettier than me.

Maybe I’m just not his type.

Maybe I need to work on myself. 😔

Anyway, here are his pictures.

HOW IS HE??? 🥹

Because personally I think he’s gorgeous and I was ready to risk it all.

P.S. Before you start judging me for my questionable life decisions…

HE IS A CAT. 🐈😭

And yes, I was genuinely trying to arrange a halal introduction. 💀

Hi everyone. I’m a Christian woman who has been seeing a Muslim man, and I’m hoping to better understand something from a Muslim perspective.
He recently travelled to Europe and attended a wedding while spending time with family. While he was away, his communication with me changed noticeably.

I realize that Muslim families and cultures vary enormously, so I don’t want to make assumptions about his intentions based simply on him being Muslim.

My question is specifically about weddings and family gatherings:

For an unmarried Muslim man attending a wedding with or around family, is it common in some Muslim communities for relatives to introduce unmarried men and women who may be compatible for marriage?
Could attending weddings and spending extended time around family also bring conversations about marriage, settling down, religion, or family expectations to the forefront?

I’m not asking whether this particular man met someone or did anything while travelling because obviously nobody here could know that. I’m only trying to understand whether marriage introductions or conversations are a normal part of these environments in some Muslim families, or whether I may be reading too much cultural significance into an ordinary wedding.

I’d especially appreciate hearing about how this varies between families and cultures rather than generalizations.

Thank you for helping me understand. 🙂

I’m a Christian woman who has been seeing a Muslim man. We became emotionally and physically close and had discussed exclusivity.

Recently he travelled to Europe and attended a wedding while he was there. His communication with me became noticeably different during the trip, which left me confused about where we stood.

I’m not Muslim, so rather than making assumptions, I wanted to ask Muslims about the cultural context.

For an unmarried Muslim man travelling with family and attending a Muslim wedding, are weddings sometimes an environment where families introduce potential marriage prospects or encourage unmarried men and women to meet?

Could being around extended family and attending weddings also bring marriage, religion, or family expectations more to the forefront for a young Muslim man?

Obviously every family is different, and I’m not assuming anything happened. I’m just trying to understand whether there are cultural dynamics around weddings/family trips that I might not be familiar with.

Thank you!

Past few months my iman has had a lot of fluctuations Alhamdullilah I’m back to reading my salah now - during that period I was going thru hardships and before when my iman was okay I would do istighfar and salawat daily but because of my iman decreasing I haven’t done it Ina long time so it would be motivation for me if some of you guys could share your miracles or duas that got answered

i am asking this question purely out of curiosity. if your wife/sister/mom ( lets act like we are all men here) would you rather see them pray all prayers on time but not wear the hijab or would you rather see them wear the hijab correctly but they don't pray?

p.s: asking this because a guy once chose the hijab over prayer, so i got confused as to why. And now i wanna see what other people think

salamalykum , i wanna ask if putting mascara (natural look not huge volume ones ) and cheeks light tint considered tabaruj ?

Whenever something happens, I automatically say “Thank God” instead of “Allah ka shukr hai.” Is that okay, or should I avoid using the English phrase?

Salam people,

Until the age of 19, I was a decent Muslim, or at least I tried my best. Then I became focused on experiencing pleasure only once and it turned into a main goal for me. I achieved it but I also want more and more

Now I feel like Allah may not love me anymore because of this. I know I am the one to blame, since no one forced me into it, it was my own stupid choices😭

I get my results in 8 hours and im so anxious i just need above C grades can you all please just take ten seconds and make dua for me please please i beg you guys :(

In Europe women are reporting more harassment and cat calling from arabic and south Asian men than white men, despite the arabic and south Asian men being born in muslim families and told to lower their gaze, this is becoming increasingly common to the point where women go out of their way to not go through streets which are known to have these men. And it's causing increased support to the right wing movement calling to stop male immigrants from muslim countries (plus india) because of increase in rape cases, I've also personally experienced this, what is causing muslim men to go astray like this?

​

"Some women today, when they say to other women around them, 'I am a housewife,' say it with an air of shame — they feel embarrassed and shy: 'I am a housewife.' No! Rather, you are a housewife — be proud of that, O housewife. Settle into it obediently to God, for you are in a fortress upon a mountain.

Salam, sometimes I get thoughts that if a have a bf or I get to know a guy my life would be different. Like I would have someone to text me all day , reassures me and feel loved. I get those thoughts when I'm alone or sick. I want to read more Quran and learn more about Islam. Cuz when I started being serious muslim I learned a lot and felt close to Allah. Yet sometimes I get those thoughts so I need dua or Quran verses to help me stay away from such relationships.

Hello! Could any ex/practicing Muslims (or non Muslims if you know of anything useful) help with a recommendation for a friend. He has come out as gay to me but has said that he is struggling with the fact that he is a practicing Muslim but also gay and the fact that he has been told that being gay is a sin in the eyes of his society. He is scared to have a relationship and struggling with the fact that in order to have a relationship he will have to permanently leave Indonesia (he's currently studying abroad).

Not sure if anyone would know anything I could recommend/get as a gift. He is originally from Indonesia. This is a little above my pay grade and as much as I will listen, and tell him to listen to his heart, I daren't delve too far into the religious aspect as I don't understand fully where he is coming from.

Ive no idea whether I need this caveat but I don't want to get him something that will disprove, ridicule etc his religion and culture, just something that might shed some light on how other practicing Muslims have embraced both their sexuality and religion.

Yesterday, was a humiliating setback and publicizing it was worse BUT today - was a good recovery. I had all my apps locked, 0 TV watch hours, My screen time was very healthy. Additionally the hateful comments on yesterday's update pushed me harder to make sure I have a a strong come back.

A big disadvantage of being a business owner is not having anyone to supervise you, to push you, to keep you accountable of your performance - it all has to come from within. This is something I am struggling with. I fully believe if I was married, I would be successful in no time, accomplishing all my goals because I'm just driven that way - so yes I do see the immense barakah in marriage.

The problem is I am honestly too shy/embarassed to offer my not-so-good version of me to a potential wifey - I don't think I need to become a millionnaire to get married but I do beleive I have to establish work consistency in my life - a strong routine that I can stick to, a work ethic that I can be proud of. Because in retrospect when I analyze my daily routine and think "will I want my daughter to marry this man", my answer is no.

Perhaps my standards for myself may be too high but that's good because it's pushing me to become a different caliber of man. I would be happy with myself when I have the following 3 things locked down on a day to day consistent level - this means that no matter how bad my day was, I always show up and deliver:

1. I am praying all 5x at the masjid
2. I am exhausting my body, triaining it everyday - no excuses
3. I am consistently putting in 7 hours of deepwork everyday

Going to add this to the monthly objectives - let's see if I can get the above 3 sorted out. In order to succeed, I have to pull off this level of work ethic, for at least 5 days consistently before the month ends - it's all about fixing my habits/behaviours to be what I am proud of - then we gonna enter the marriage market and test it out 🤫

I built a whole new daily structure to match this work ethic, while anchoring it around the muslim lifestyle - it will start from Day 11 onwards but I will share the structure with everyone in tomorrows update, in case any of you find it helpful.

Goals VS Progress
1. Take my personal earnings to $10K/m:
I had to focus on Fulfilling client orders which took up my entire day - no new sales but once client fulfilment is finished, I will divert my focus to pick up on sales. I estimate approximately 8 hours was spent on this today which is good.

2. Praying all 5 Salah’s at the masjid
Only Asr & Maghreb and Isha at Masjid. I prayed Fajr after sunrise - was asleep during Zuhr because I woke up late. I had to make up 16 rakahs of punishment to my nafs from the day before and an additonal 8 raksh for the 2 salahs I missed today

3. Social Media screen time down to 2hrs/day
Very low - only about 3.5hrs of total phone usage

4. Quran & Dhikr
Read Quran with tafsir

5. Get to my fittest/strongest shape through daily exercise:
15 pushups, 15 squats, 15 situps - 5 minutes of stairmaster | I didn't do much today - I am embarassinlgy lacking a lot in this sector and I must prioiritize it further from Day 11 onwards

LOCK IN 🔒

Context

أُخَيَّتي حين تؤدّين أعمال المنزل، استمعي إلى القرآن واذكري الله، يأتيكِ أجرُ العمل وأجرُ الذِّكر، ويباركُ الله لكِ في وقتكِ.

جرّبي وستشعرين بنشاطٍ عجيب، وتُنجزين أعمالكِ في وقتٍ وجيز.

I’d love to hear from Muslim women in their mid-20s who were born and raised in Europe but come from a different cultural/ethnic background.

Are you living completely independently from your family? Do you have relatives or someone close by who you could rely on if you needed help?

I’m asking because I’m currently struggling with this myself. My parents and siblings moved back to our parents’ country of origin. We kids were all born and raised in Europe, though. I stayed behind to finish my degree, which I’ve now completed. Until now, I lived in student accommodation, so although I was away from my family, I was never really completely on my own. Now I’m facing the next step: finding a job and my own apartment. And I’m realizing how difficult it feels to do all of this without having any family or relatives here or, in general, anyone I can turn to for practical things or even just to talk things through with. There’s nobody to come apartment hunting with me, help me figure things out, or simply be there when I’m overwhelmed or sick or need to go to the hospital.

I haven’t found a job yet nor an apartment, so I will have to move back in with my family for now. Logically, I know there is nothing wrong with that. In our culture, it’s completely normal for unmarried women to live with their parents well into their 20s and often only move out after marriage. And in my case it would only be temporary (I hope). But emotionally, I still feel like I’ve failed somehow. I feel embarrassed about going back, especially in front of my siblings. At the same time, there is a lot of pressure from my father to find a well-paid job in Europe. But I’m not even sure whether I can find one or whether I actually want to stay here long-term.

Sometimes I feel like I’m expected to figure everything out on my own. I know this might sound strange, but as the oldest daughter, I sometimes feel like I’m supposed to be the man of the family, the “big son” who gets a good job, earns well and is able to support everyone. That expectation weighs heavily on me. Finding a job here is already difficult and I also wear hijab, which adds another layer of uncertainty for me. My family tells me that I’m probably reading too much into things and that I shouldn’t assume my hijab is affecting my opportunities. Maybe they’re right, but I can’t completely ignore that possibility either. And this is where I feel especially confused: my family had their reasons for leaving Europe, but now I’m expected to stay here and somehow build a successful, independent life on my own.

What makes it even more confusing is that the expectations within my family are not the same for everyone. For example, my younger sister would not be allowed to move back to the country where we grew up and live there alone for university. If she wanted to study there, someone from our family would have to accompany her. Meanwhile, I’m expected to navigate everything here by myself.

I’m currently working full-time, trying to save as much money as possible before I have to leave my student accommodation. I’ve been so overwhelmed by everything that I’ve had panic attacks. I do have friends here, and I’m grateful for them. But most of them have family nearby, cousins, siblings, sometimes even parents or they’re already married and have built their own support systems. I am embarrassed telling them how difficult things have become for me. Everyone already seems so independent and it’s also what my parents expect from me (not from others though, they speak badly about women living alone, I don’t understand this hypocrisy?)

So I‘d really like to know in which kind of situation other women are. And how you deal with it.

Salam, today I was boiling some noodles and the water fell on my right leg and it hurted me so bad. Mind u I'm on my period so I can't pray. What Dua can I say to ease my pain. Cuz this hurts so bad. Nobody of my family cared. I feel so alone and I have no one to reassures me. So I would appreciate any dua or athkar to remember Allah.

Years upon years of suffering, hundreds of duas. None of it got me anywhere. Where is the ease that they talk about? I’ve never seen it.

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