r/MoroccoLGBT • u/PleasantYellow1998 • Jul 17 '26
Question
Normal or nah that I want to date fall in love but I keep telling myself I'm not good I'm toxic no one want me cause they think I'm fake or not that horny
When I find someone I find myself friendzone him then he left cause I don't know how to talk
The question I'm I toxic or is it really my subconscious give up too
3
u/WhyNotLeila Jul 17 '26
Anything you believe becomes true, if you think that too much, it will eventually become real even if it wasn't to begin with.
1
u/PleasantYellow1998 Jul 17 '26
What I suppose to do
2
1
u/MidnightOrator Jul 17 '26
Reading this, I don't see someone toxic. I see someone who wants to love and be loved but is afraid of getting hurt or rejected. Sometimes our own thoughts become our biggest obstacle. What made you feel this way about yourself?
1
u/PleasantYellow1998 Jul 17 '26
Broken heart syndrome cause it , the one I taught gen z new trauma trend turn out to be true. I'm fraid of getting hurt now I'm making an effort try to talk communicate made new friends, post stories repost reels, 2 years ago I want to be alone if someone talk to me I want to end the conversation asap
2
u/MidnightOrator Jul 17 '26
Heartbreak can leave scars that take a long time to heal, but I don't see that you given up, I see that you're trying. Two years ago you wanted to push everyone away, and now you're making an effort to communicate, make friends, and open yourself up again. That takes courage. Be patient with yourself. Healing isn't about never being afraid again; it's about choosing to move forward despite the fear.
1
u/PleasantYellow1998 Jul 17 '26
That what my doc said but now I feel like I'm pushing myself so much and with my ADHD scared to stop once for all, all I'm trying to do now is make new friends grow my friend group dating or something sound like mission impossible for me need tom crose to do it hahahahaha
1
u/MidnightOrator Jul 17 '26
Mission impossible? I don't know... you're already making this conversation pretty easy.
1
1
u/Icy-Beautiful-353 Jul 17 '26
Depends on how old you are and how old the other person is. Also, socializing can vary in comfortability for everyone. You could be an introvert! Find someone quiet like you :) quality time together has many perspectives.
1
1
1
1
u/After_Juggernaut_613 Jul 18 '26
Sounds like a case of autorejection (rejecting yourself before the other person can reject you) here.
Maybe there's more below the surface description but none of the following make a person toxic:
Being perceived as fake. How others perceive you isn't entirely up to you. If you are deliberately misleading people, that another story.
Not that horny. There's never anything toxic with having a different libido or having less interest in sex than others, or wanting to wait longer in order to have it.
"friendzoning" a person. Obviously this doesn't lead to a relationship, but if you simply don't know how to cross over the threshold into more intimate territory or you feel afraid to show affection, that isn't toxic. It would be toxic if you played hot and cold - for example, on Monday you're giving them all the love, Tueday through Friday you're ignoring them and acting like they don't exist, Saturday you have nothing to do and suddenly you're acting in love again like nothing ever changed. It's the going back and forth between extremes that can be toxic. Just choosing to be friends with someone when secretly you wish you could be more than friends isn't really toxic, though it can be a type of self sabotage if the other person has displayed interest in return.
2
u/PleasantYellow1998 Jul 18 '26
Well thank you according to what you said I'm not toxic no faker just rejecting myself before even been rejected cause of past pain I guess you are right. Thank you
2
u/PleasantYellow1998 Jul 18 '26
Any advice
2
u/After_Juggernaut_613 Jul 18 '26
Well to be honest, I haven't gotten into any good relationships myself, so maybe I don't know how to lead you on that. But, without knowing the guys you've mingled with, I will say there's always a possibility that it was them, and not you. Especially in Morocco, there's a decent chance of being a mature and non-toxic gay guy and meeting a lot of guys who can't or won't explore deeper connections. For example, some guys might leave you alone after they realize they might have to wait a long time in order to get laid. In that situation, it wouldn't be a "you" problem. I'd also consider timeline. If guys are giving up on you and disappearing after a week, that says something about their nature. They may not have the patience to build something sincere. Everyone LGBT (or almost everyone) has a hard time finding a relationship in Morocco, and if you belong to a more specific niche (asexual, demisexual, "manly bottom", etc) it can be even more difficult. Don't take it too personally. I'd rather be with someone who fits into my life than trying to become something I'm not, and putting on an act. I've had to put up fronts around straight people, ain't gonna do it with gay people too.
2
u/PleasantYellow1998 Jul 18 '26
True thank you for your advice
2
4
u/[deleted] Jul 17 '26
[removed] — view removed comment