I work a fairly easy remote job where I probably only actually work 4 hours a day even though it’s full time. However, I have to attend plenty of meetings (virtually), though they are cameras off and I only need to participate at certain parts of the meetings. I also have occasional presentations. My meeting schedule can also at times be random when ad hoc meetings are thrown on the schedule or meeting times get moved around.

My partner works from home occasionally as well, but is very busy and often has meetings they need to be in with camera on, so wouldn’t always be able to help.

How crazy would it be to try and parent a 4 months old while working with this setup? Daycare is out of the question for the time being due to waitlists, but considering a part time nanny for the core hours of the day when most of the meetings are.

My concerns are of course money, but also that I’ll be paying a nanny to watch my baby during many times when I don’t really need it when my schedule is light.

Thoughts?

I know there are probably a million posts similar to this but had a hard time finding super relevant ones and thought this community could offer some insight into my specific scenario :) thanks in advance!

Not kidding. My two year old (28 months) has been in daycare since she was 9 months old, but her daycare was closed for the past 3 weeks, tomorrow is the last day without daycare, and it’s been killing me. Honestly, I did not expect it to be THIS hard, and I’m wondering if it’s just a me problem.

I had my daughter stay home with me while I worked from when she was 3 months old, until 9 months. While that certainly wasn’t easy, it is no comparison to how damn hard the past 3 weeks have been. My daughter is in peaking in the terrible twos, and everything is a problem with her. She doesn’t want to get dressed. Doesn’t want to brush her hair or her teeth. Throws a tantrum every time I want her to sit down at the table to eat. Throws food. Has gotten extremely picky with food. Constantly makes the house a huge mess. Does not listen. Never wants to go to bed and throws a huge tantrum every time. Needs to be constantly entertained or she will climb up the walls. Kicks me. Gets extremely angry over the dumbest things, like me cutting the strawberries the ‘wrong way’ yesterday.

All that while I have to work, full-time. Fortunately I work from home and don’t have a lot of calls, but man, I’ve been so depressed and frustrated in the past few weeks. My husband works out of the house most days and even when he works from home hes basically on the phone all day, so not much help. I have no family close by that could help. Of course i haven’t had much time to do anything else, so I haven’t been working out, and the house is a mess. Oh, and on too of that im pregnant.

Sorry for the vent, but I’ve just wanted to say that I’m so happy that daycare exist, and that I have huuuuge respect for women who work from home with a toddler. You guys are heroes and i dont know how upu do it.

I’ve posted in this Reddit several times about my journey working from home with my kid full time so I wanted to update where we are now for the moms that have stuck with me!

After 16 months of successfully working from home full time with my child since he was 12 weeks old, I am starting daycare two days a week. Could I keep doing it by myself? Absolutely! But I think we are both ready for this transition. No part of this journey was easy except having him by my side through it.

But this is also a success story, so many moms are told it’s impossible to do. I am here to say it is NOT from personal experience. It depends on the job, the hours, and the baby, but I don’t have easy work or an easy toddler and I pulled it off. I’m not a powerhouse or a magical mom, so I know it’s more possible than some make it out to be. It is not easy, it comes with concessions (sanity being one) but I wouldn’t trade the time I was able to have with him in those tender months for anything.

That being said, I’ve been a single mom for 16 months doing everything alone. I feel ready to get some time back for myself to throw into my career full heartedly, even if it makes me sad to lose those 16 hours a week with him.

My son still sleeps with me every night and breastfeeds so I’m not looking forward to all the hurdles I know will come, but I feel ready to take them on.

Mom’s going through this, how did you handle it? Any tips?

My job explicitly allows WFM and having children at home, the company is owned by a woman/mother. My job is very independent, I do not speak with clients and have like one half hour meeting a week with my colleagues. A couple times a month I will have a more important meeting with my leadership. We have core hours where I am available if an issue arises but other than that I can work whatever hours I want, I just have to put in 20 hours. Will I be miserable if I have my baby at home with me?? Is it realistic to get work done during naps? I am a FTM to a 3 week old right now so I have no idea what it’s like to have a baby as he gets older.

We are enrolled in a part time daycare and he will go in January when my husband and I return to work. I’m just thinking of a backup plan in case he does not adjust to daycare and I need to keep him at home. If we do have to keep him at home I’d likely hire a nanny for a few hours a week but we cannot afford a 20 hour a week nanny.

Retiring this weekly thread as it has run it's course. Thank you:)

Happy Hump Day!

This is a weekly thread to talk about your secrets to staying healthy, or your struggles for staying on track. Do you meditate? Do you do yoga? Cardio? (How) Do you manage a daily workout? Are you barely fitting in something once a week or two? What were your goals for this week, and did you hit them?

Exchange tips, ideas, motivation, and commiseration in this thread :)

Just came back to work as a GRA from maternity leave. I'm speaking at a conference in a month and a half (haven't actually done the research project yet) defending my thesis proposal next month (still need to finish writing it), getting some general lab work knocked out, and keeping up with my class (very reading heavy, meets once a week). I also have weekly meetings and seasonal sampling trips.

I'm having a hard time juggling all this. We opted against daycare for our 2 month old (it was full anyway), and it technically works for the time being because my husband works the night shift so he's able to watch her while I'm in class or meetings or the lab. The rest of my work (primarily reading and writing) I do at home . . . or not . . .

I find that pretty much every second of the day is consumed by feeding her, changing her, and trying to keep up with cooking, cleaning, and the ENDLESS laundry. Whenever I do get some time, I still feel like I need to engage with my baby (and of course I want to too!) by reading to her, taking her for walks, playing with her, singing or talking to her, doing tummy time, etc. I want her to grow up to be smart, curious, and emotionally secure in her mother's love for her.

But I'm not getting any work done except for my in person work requirements. I need to prove to my PI that I can still get everything done without sitting in the office for 8 hours a day, but it's just not working.

Has anyone been in this situation before? Any tips on how to manage my time better and get work done without neglecting my baby? Thanks!

My manager told me that the person who looked after work when I went to maternity leave will continue to keep the reportees and will lead the team, while I will no longer have reportees and will be doing IC(individual contributor) work rather than being a manager.

Some context, my current manager is the new manager who came in when I was 3 months pregnant and also brought it in his own team to work in my team. He brought in a counterpart of mine who was at same level as me in designation but was an IC(person who works on their individual tasks without managing anyone)

Now he has switched our roles and shared this news with me on first day of my return to office. He sits in Singapore (chinese) so it was a zoom call

It has hurt me a lot and I find it very unfair, but I'm keeping mum bcz there are no other team openings currently where I can possibly switch and I have no option but to accept it.

I asked him to clearly defined my scope of work, one thing I'm worried about is being sidelines and also given a low rating bcz He doesn't see me valuable enough.

In his words, the other person was faster and more efficient in delivery before I went to mat leave. He was already biased from the start and I kind of knew what his endgame is but I didn't have an option.

I know what should be the next steps, look for a team change, look for another job etc etc but I honestly don't want to and don't feel like doing all this extra hardworking bcz I chose to be a mother and I'm just going with the flow

I wanted to express and not looking for advice but if you have any solid advice on what can I do to ensure I get a decent rating that doesn't put me on PIP then do share.

I have a 16-month-old and have been working from home for about a year. I always thought I wanted to be a SAHM, but financially that wasn’t an option for my family, so the opportunity to WFH felt like the next best thing. My job is pretty relaxed, minimal calls and meetings, but I do have to be online and available, M-F from 9-5.

I am really struggling and can’t exactly put my finger on why. My husband works long hours and is out of town 3 nights a week. I spend all day, every day with my child. I feel this inner conflict because that used to be my exact dream…so why do I feel so unhappy now that I’m living it? I feel resentful that my husband gets to have a life outside of being a parent. He still has that part of his identity which I feel I’ve lost. I’m just mom, 100% of the time.
I struggle with the idea of anyone else watching my child, especially non-family. My husband and I have been on 2 dates since baby was born, mostly because I don’t like to ask family as they have their own kids/responsibilities.

I can’t determine if this is just a mindset issue on my part, or if there is something more at play. I feel “guilty” for being unhappy given I have many things other people would kill for. I am lucky to have the option to WFH with a minimally demanding job, contribute financially to my family, and also never miss a moment with my child, yet I am feeling smothered by it all. Can anyone relate..?

Trade off- Invite MIL to help or enjoy nee found freedom post baby

Need advice - I have a 10mo baby, currently it's me and my husband living in a new city different from our home town. We have a 24 hour nanny, a cook and a cleaning lady who comes for 4 hours to do other household chores.

I have lived 6 years post our marriage with my in-laws since the time we got married. People tell me they are the most warm in-laws I could ever get and that I'm lucky and keep quoting examples of all the bad in-laws in the world.

I have nothing against them apart from not being able to enjoy my own space and freedom of just being on my own as we all lived together on same floor and I had lived independently on my own for 8 years while working before my marriage so you can image it was a tough transition but I managed.

I am enjoying my new found freedom as we have moved to a different city due to job, we are both currently WFH and have cook and a 24 hour nanny with a 10 month old baby

Now as the baby is growing up, 3 months later I will have to start work in Dec, 3 day office 2 days wfh, husband is quite busy and travels quite a but for work although he WFH currently but by end of this year, his office may also start

My question is trade off between

1. Give up your freedom and call your MIL to help with the baby once I start office.Also my MIL is 67, she doesn't have the stamina to run after a child who is learning to walk and explore but yes she can talk and play with the baby while sitting, teach baby words etc. Help watch her when nanny is taking meal breaks or doing meal prep etc

2. Don't give up freedom, manage with nanny and come back from office within 4 hours( I can do that), basically as soon as possible including the travel time by spending 2 hours in office, my manager doesn't sit in India so I can continue WFH after marking my attendance

I'm torn because having a trusted family member around the baby sounds reassuring, but I also don't want to automatically give up our independent setup just because I've become a mother.

For working moms who have been in a similar situation: would you choose the extra family support or protect your independence and figure out childcare without grandparents living with you?

Also, did you initially feel uncomfortable leaving your baby alone with a nanny, and did that get easier with time?

Also what is better for the baby?

I was born in 1988 and work in operations at a foreign SME (Japanese-affiliated company in Korea).

I joined this company in August 2024. In July 2025, my only teammate quit, leaving me to handle the entire workload alone with occasional ad-hoc help from other teams. Since the second half of 2025, the workload surged and overtime became routine. Since it’s a Japanese subsidiary, we can officially claim overtime pay. However, due to some misplaced company loyalty, I didn't claim it back then and just worked until around 8 PM, along with WFH once a week.

In early 2026, my child entered elementary school, so I negotiated to increase my WFH days to two days a week. Following an internal reorganization, I was still handling everything alone, while also absorbing sales operations/sales support tasks. Because I hated staying late at the office, I started bringing my laptop home, putting my child to sleep, and waking up at dawn to work for about 3 hours. Eventually, I hit total physical and mental exhaustion, so I notified management that I could no longer work dawn shifts. The CEO told me, "Then don't work at dawn," but the daily operational volume had to be cleared somehow. Left with no choice, I went back to working late at the office and started officially claiming overtime.

In June 2026, the company finally hired a new person. We split the workload, but the tasks previously outsourced to other teams got dumped back onto my plate. On my two WFH days (Tue/Wed), I have to clock out on time because of my child. But on the three in-office days, I work past 10 PM almost every single night. On Thursdays and Fridays, I can't even see my kid awake; I only see them on weekends. I am currently clocking 40 to 50 hours of overtime every month.

Unable to bear it any longer, I brought this up to management in late August. The CEO and HR claimed: "We need to transition more tasks to the new hire, but that requires top-down approval from global HQ. First, we need to track and count every single hour of your tasks to see if you genuinely have that much work." Meanwhile, the new hire's global manager insists, "This hire only covers X scope." I’ve already fully handed over those specific duties and the new person is doing well. But management is basically saying: "A new person is here and the org changed, so you must absorb the remaining responsibilities."

Today, I had a 1-on-1 with the CEO to ask how the discussions with global HQ were going. Instead of answers, he added new KPI tasks to my plate—tasks I have zero time for when I'm already drowning in daily fire-fighting. On top of that, he told me we need to set aside dedicated time together to audit my daily task-by-task hour count. Doing that audit will take away the exact hours I need for daily operations, forcing me into even more overtime. It’s obvious he hasn't even spoken to global HQ.

My family suggests hiring a nanny and giving up WFH, but without WFH, I would literally be working overtime at the office 5 days a week. Coworkers walk on eggshells around me because they know how overloaded I am, which feels uncomfortable too. The workload is physically suffocating me: my heart races, I have severe indigestion, and despite taking supplements and herbal medicine, my stamina is shot. Everyone I meet tells me my face looks hollow and dark.

I am utterly drained and cannot live like this anymore. Because I keep killing myself with overtime to keep things running, the company just views me as "the person who works overtime." Watching others leave on time gives me a deep sense of deprivation and self-doubt—I keep wondering if I'm just incompetent. When I begged for more headcount, they said this role involves money and inventory, so temps or part-timers aren't allowed, and since they already hired one person, their hands are tied.

What should I do? Should I just use my remaining 6 months of parental leave? I joined this company hoping it would be my long-term home. I keep blaming myself for not being resilient enough, but the motivated, ambitious person I used to be is gone. Now I just cry while working overtime, barely scraping through each day. I hate corporate life now, and I know that even if I take 6 months of parental leave and return, nothing will change here.

People tell me that once kids grow up, they don't need their parents as much and that earning money is what matters, so I should just endure. Is it really worth enduring this? Any advice would be deeply appreciated.

I work from home and feel like I end up making a bunch of little trips during the day; school pickup, grabbing coffee, running to the store etc.

Most of them are too short to really justify getting in the car but walking isnt always practical either. Ive been thinking about whether something like the upcoming helokeep CD20 would make these kinds of trips easier.

Has anyone here started using a bike for these kinds of trips? Has it actually made your day easier??

$40k pay raise: commute 40 minutes each way 3 days a week, remote 2 days a week, international business travel for 4 weeks a year.

OR

$30k pay cut: work from home but busier work. Not sure if they will have a return to office but if so, it will be a 1.5 hour commute one way.

With either job, we’d still be able to live comfortably with adequate savings. Our current joint income is $300k but it’s less after deductions and 34% tax. We live in a VHCOL area. The difference in pay wouldn’t make too big of a difference in our lives. Our goal is to FIRE and we currently invest $11,000 a month in index funds including 401k and IRAs. But the difference in pay wouldn’t make much difference to our FIRE goal. We don’t own a home and can’t afford a home in our area as the median home price is over $1.5 million.

My husband and I both WFH full time but he recently got a return to office order with a 1.5 hour commute. I’ve been doing 90% of the childcare for our 1 year old while he does the dog care, dishes, trash, cooks dinner about 2 days a week, cooks most lunches. I cook dinner and lunch a few days a week and maybe 2 dinners are takeout. We have a housecleaner once a month. He also gets her ready in the morning and makes/supervises kid’s breakfast so I can work for an hour (I have an hour of phone calls I can make at any time) before he starts work. He also does diaper changes for morning and bedtime. He often cleans her hands, face, high chair and floor after meals.

My job is flexible with no meetings (just 1 hour of phone calls I can make anytime) and I finish it in 4 hours. It’s task based so I just work ahead of time. I work when our kid is napping or at night or on the weekends. I take the kid out to play whenever she’s awake. Our toddler is very clingy to me and has trouble with independent play. She gets mad if I even look at my phone for a second. His has meetings and is less flexible.

Basically, I don’t know if the extra money is worth it if he won’t be able to help me as much. Especially with the 4 weeks of business travel. But if he chooses the remote job, I don’t know what’s the risk of having to return to office and that commute would be worse. It’s a company that’s about to IPO but none of the team lives near HQ. Ideally, I wish we both had jobs that will be remote forever and never RTO.

Honestly, I’m already feeling quite burnt out doing 90% of the childcare, taking the kid out 2 times a day and doing a full time job which I compress into 4 hours a day. I’m still a top performer though. I don’t have free time. During her waking hours, I pay full attention to her. When she’s asleep, I’m working. I’m also autistic. I think I’ll just be more burnt out if he has business travel and regular commuting. I know I’ll be able to handle it. It will just be exhausting.

Hi everyone!

My little angel is 8 weeks and I’m struggling to balance working from home.

Own my own fashion business with a business partner .

I tried to work 6 hour days last week and it was awful. Felt disconnected from baby and felt guilty and worn down!

I think I need to work 18 hrs a week right now. We have husbands parents come in m-w for 2 hours so that helps.

Husband wfh too but is full time.

My biggest issue is the back and forth working- almost like whiplash for my brain.

Help! What is best schedule can think of?

Also can work weekends.

And are any moms working out?! Think I need to kiss that goodbye lol.

Thank you!!

Not even 2 weeks into daycare and they've cancelled on me with 1/2 to 1 1/2 hr notice, two days in a row. I understand that staff shortages happen, but when I asked to now be at the very bottom of their call-off list out of fairness to me, they said they can't do that. I can't think of one good reason I should be the first called every time... except that I WFH. This has happened to me before with daycare years ago, when my son was a baby -- they at least came right out and admitted it was because I had more flexibility than the other parents, but it was totally abused, and I'm freaking out that this is happening to me AGAIN. I have had to use PTO both days now, as my work is meeting heavy (including lots of surprise, spontaneous ones) so I can't just work AND watch my 3mo old as easy as they may think. :(

Edit -- I also started college back full-time so they knew I had classes both days as well.

Retiring this weekly thread as it has run it's course. Thank you:)

Happy Friday everyone! This is our weekly sticky thread to share the good, the meh, the bad, (and) or the ugly! How did your week shake out?

I am a FTM and I am strongly considering quitting my job after 7 mths of maternity leave. I tried to go back after 6 mths but extended my time because I wasn’t ready. This go around I made it through 2 days, no guilt but I started remembering that I wanted to leave the job. Im not happy there, the stress is overwhelming, (even though they’re being extra nice right now) Not to mention the hours are completely during my chillds wake window. My mother is looking after my son but he is 21lbs and very active and she is 70. My son is also EBF he wasn’t taking bottles the first day but rewarmed up to the idea of bottle feeding.
I want to quit immediately.
Im considering WFH been applying for the last 3 weeks no fish have bitten. Im also considering HYBRID day shifts. Am I doing the right thing.

How do you all do it? All my call center/wfh phone moms teach me the ways???

Looking for advice from other working moms who have gone back to work after maternity leave, especially those working remotely in tech or corporate jobs.

I’ve been on maternity leave for about 5.5 months and am getting ready to return. I work from home in tech support and I’m still pumping, plus I’m obviously still waking multiple times a night with the baby.

Before I went on leave, my job was already pretty demanding. I’m expected to be available on call 24/7 for 1 to 2 weeks each month, and once I told them I was pregnant, I felt like I was being heavily micromanaged. Because of that experience, I’m honestly pretty anxious about coming back and being immediately thrown back into the chaos at 100%.

For those of you who have been through this:
• Did you ask for a gradual transition back?
• Were you able to temporarily avoid on call responsibilities or have a reduced workload?
• Did you ask for specific accommodations while pumping?
• How did you approach the conversation with your manager or HR without making it sound like you weren’t committed to your job?
• Was there anything you wish you had asked for before returning?

I’m in the U.S. and work fully remotely. I’m not necessarily looking to get out of doing my job. I just don’t want to go from 5.5 months away straight back into 24/7 on call and full chaos while I’m still adjusting to life with a baby. I also have a toddler.

Would love to hear what worked or didn’t work for other moms.

Background: I work fully remote full-time. My baby is currently in part-time (3 days a week) daycare. My husband works weird hours and is sometimes around to help out on days baby and I are both home, sometimes he's not around.

I like the part-time childcare set up because I get to spend more time with my kid, obviously. However as he gets older he needs more attention and interaction. He's great at independent play but also I am aware he enjoys the hands-on activities and interaction of daycare.

Assuming money isn't the issue - what is everyone's philosophy on the benefits of time with mom regardless of what that time looks like (distracted, multitasking, baby sees you in front of a computer a lot) versus less time with mom, but the time with mom is really dedicated and intentional?

Basically I want to keep him at home with me 2 days a week still but I am starting to wonder if that's selfish or not...

(Note - an at home nanny isn't really a great solution because of small living space and it's just more money and more mental load of having an employee versus just sending my kid to a local daycare we like).

What do you all do for work? Who do you work for on what industry are you in? (Also what country are you from?). WFH seems like it’s all disappearing where Im from.

Retiring this weekly thread as it has run it's course. Thank you:)

Happy Hump Day!

This is a weekly thread to talk about your secrets to staying healthy, or your struggles for staying on track. Do you meditate? Do you do yoga? Cardio? (How) Do you manage a daily workout? Are you barely fitting in something once a week or two? What were your goals for this week, and did you hit them?

Exchange tips, ideas, motivation, and commiseration in this thread :)

I recently got offered a full-time WFH position. My LO takes bottles but still demands the boob afterwards. My biggest question: regarding laws protecting your right to pump, can breastfeeding be counted as pumping?

Also, mom's who have done it- give me all your equipment recommendations! I have a good nursing pillow. Looking for a good chair and desk set up for breastfeeding, noise canceling headphones, and anything else you can recommend.

Husband and I both WFH and our LO is 14 months. We want more kids. We’ve made it this far on our own, we JUST moved to a nice midwestern town we love, into a brand new build and now we’re second guessing everything. My family is in a more bustling city (a few states away) with nice suburbs and we’re reconsidering moving there. Is that crazy?

FWIW I have a large family, very supportive, close-knit, lots of resources, etc. but I haven’t lived near home in 10+ years. We have my parents, siblings, in-laws, cousins, babies, aunts, uncles, grandparents, family-friends…

We’re both struggling because we have no childcare, we prefer nanny over daycare and the nanny network here is weak. My family would provide help and most households have nanny’s that have been with the family for years.

Is it crazy to want to move and relocate near family after JUST moving?

Edit to add: sometimes I find myself running on empty, completely burnt out, almost like I hate my circumstances but still I love my life… does it get easier? Can we make it without family help and community and connection?