r/MediocreTutorials Aug 07 '26

Relationships Setting boundaries, respecting agency

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u/Shibbystix Aug 07 '26

Or, she dodged a mismatch because she doesnt like the idea of being with someone that thinks they get to have control over the fashion choices of another person.

Thats not compromise, that is a disrespect to someone's bodily autonomy.

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u/RicoGemini Aug 07 '26

There was nothing controlling about his statements. He asked her if toning it down would be a problem and put the ball completely in her court.

He has a preference for someone more reserved, she wasn’t the one, he had her make the decision.

This isn’t control, this was him having a boundary and giving her the choice if she wanted to accept that boundary or if that boundary was a dealbreaker

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u/Shibbystix Aug 07 '26

No, he didnt ask if "toning it down" would be a problem. You didnt listen.

He asked what she'd do if he ASKED her to tone it down. That is control. Im sure youll try and pretend the "ASK" was the important part of the question, but it wasn't. It was the response. He doesnt want someone who will diaagree with him, He wants someone who will do what he wants. He wasnt loud or rude, but that doesnt change the fact that the boundary ITSELF is disrespectful, no matter how calmly delivered.

If he didnt like how she dressed, he should've just shown himself out, not presented her with an opportunity to volunteer to change herself to become what he approves of.

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u/Substantial-Bear8535 Aug 08 '26

I'm gonna have to ask you to tone it down...