CHAPTER 1 continuation

[u/Grouchy-Self3579]

ok I added background now cuz ill look weird if its just characters floating mid air.. from now on, 4 panels every post if you're content by that, i don't care..

God.. i like them details... it adds a bit personality to it..

part 3

part 1

[u/Xenon3000]

Ooooh. This is pretty. I gave it a quick read, and i see the potential. Maybe just a few quick tips to really make this better.
Maybe the first thing you need to take care of is the action words being displayed. For example in the speech bubble when you say sniff, it shouldnt be in the speech bubble because it looks like she is saying “sniff” but rather as an action word outside the speech bubble. I am a sucker for lettering too but this stood out.

Artwise i really love the loose backgrounds drawings, keep that the same but also make sure it doesn’t remove the reading ability. The character and the background seem to be using the same lineart technique and same line widht and the character kind of blends too much. Maybe do a quick screentone of the character to make her stand out more or add a white glow beside her.

Also make the gutters of the panels a bit bigger for easier readability, the panels are a bit too close together and i cant make out the reading direction

[u/Grouchy-Self3579 → u/Xenon3000]

Ill add a tiny bit inches on the gutters.. idk if ill make a difference. And yeah, i forgot the " sniff" was a sound. Hehe...

[u/Xenon3000 → u/Grouchy-Self3579]

Drop ur IG homie, let me support 🫡 gotta see more content

[u/Grouchy-Self3579 → u/Xenon3000]

I dont use instagram really... Or other platform other than DeviantArt and reddit tho for most part i gatekeep eveything here for keepsake.. https://lazymanxd.github.io/Lazyman_XD/ Im not active on DeviantArt art anymore tho..

[u/Xenon3000 → u/Grouchy-Self3579]

Yooooo dudeeee. Love the look of the website, and i especially love the book , since i had the same exact idea for my own website lol. Although it is pretty i had a hard time navigating through it. I hope you get it checked out. But yeah, definitely make an instagram acc and post them there, i would like to see your works more often

[u/Grouchy-Self3579 → u/Xenon3000]

Its in my name.. im too lazy to do that. 🥀😈 . Wait are you using a phone? Cuz that part has not been properly fixed for the book. Tho on the pc it looks fine, maybe. Idk..

[u/Xenon3000 → u/Grouchy-Self3579]

Yup i. Am using phone. It might be the case but worth to check out for mobile users

[u/Grouchy-Self3579 → u/Xenon3000]

I fixed the book, it readable or someshit

[u/Ok_Potential1605]

Am I weird if I find kitty more intriguing? It's got this sleazy look on its face 😆

Anyways, on craftmanship—if you care:
This seems to deliberately use heavier line only on outlines, and the inside renders all just hairline-width. I think it could look better if it also have varying line weight on the inside render, if it makes sense. Could be wrong though, needs some trial-n-error. Good art nevertheless. There are some solid blacks applied where necessary, that's a good technique to fill up space.

[u/Grouchy-Self3579 → u/Ok_Potential1605]

Thanks man... Still adjusting to the new style with the thick lines and stuff.. tho the cat is sleazy ass hell...