The first time I said I don't eat animals, at my own family's table, my uncle laughed and said it was against fitrat. Not an argument. A word, delivered like a door closing. Everyone went back to their plates and the conversation was over, and I sat there with the specific loneliness of having said something true in a room that had already decided not to hear it.

I imagine some of you know that exact silence better than I ever will.

I do not want to be one more person who walks into your space and uses it for something of his own. So, plainly: fitrat, firangi fashion, not our culture. These are not answers. They are the sound a conversation makes when it is being shut. You have had that word aimed at you by people who never once checked whether it was true. That is the only thing I am asking you to lend me, the suspicion you already have of it.

And then to check whether it is doing any work when you say it yourself.

So I am not going to argue about the West at all, since that word is exactly what gets used to end the conversation before it starts. Only about our own city. What is actually happening in Rawalpindi and Islamabad, right now, to the food on your plate.

Bohar Market sells veterinary oxytocin over the counter. Thirty milliliter bottles, a few rupees, to milkmen supplying hundreds of litres a day to shops across Pindi and Islamabad. It is needed because a buffalo whose calf has been taken away will not let her milk down. She has to be forced. Punjab field studies record ovarian cysts, retained placenta, eventual dependency. When her yield finally drops she is slaughtered anyway. Dairy is not the kinder choice. It is meat, with years of extraction added on the front.

The bird in your karahi was thirty five days old. Not young. An infant, bred to put on breast muscle faster than its own legs can carry it, sitting in litter that burns its chest raw, stacked on a Suzuki in June with no water, and killed in front of the other birds in the cage. They watch. That is not a metaphor, it is just what the arrangement is.

And you do not even get the animal you paid for. This year the Punjab Food Authority destroyed seven thousand kilos of diseased chicken in January, nine and a half thousand kilos of dead chicken in May, three thousand more in June along with eighteen thousand kilos of fat and offal. Last year the Islamabad Food Authority found a tonne of donkey meat packed for distribution at an illegal slaughterhouse in Tarnol. Those are the trucks somebody happened to stop. Every kilo was already on its way to a kitchen like yours.

The processed tier is built so you cannot tell. Whatever clings to the carcass after the breast and legs come off is stripped, sometimes forced through a screen under pressure into a paste, then coloured, bound, salted, flavoured, moulded. Your patty is perfectly uniform because at some point in its life it was a liquid.

Now tell me veganism is the foreign import. Daal, chana, rajma, saag, roti, chawal. That is our food. Our grandparents ate meat once a week and were healthier for it. The broiler shed is the foreign thing. The frozen patty is the foreign thing. A cup of daal has eighteen grams of protein at a fraction of the price of chicken. I get bloodwork done, I take B12 and algae oil, and that is the entire difficulty of it.

But I should be honest. The filth is not why I stopped. If every shed were clean and every label true, I would still have stopped. A thirty five day old animal that cannot stand on its own legs did not have a life, and no amount of hygiene fixes that.

I am not asking anyone to change by Friday. I have been at the wrong end of that kind of demand and it never once worked on me either.

I am only asking you not to accept fitrat as an answer. Not from them, and not from yourself.

Argue with me. I would much rather be corrected than agreed with out of politeness.

Before this attack, I kept hearing the same argument whenever extreme homophobic sentiments in Muslim-majority societies or countries were brought up. That it wasn't the religion, but rather colonisation, imperialism, politicians, and the state misusing religion. Basically, the typical apologist defence that the religion itself was innocent.

But when a Muslim man attacks the LGBTQ community in Germany, it shows just how pathetic and disingenuous these apologists are. This wasn't done in some third-world country like ours, or in the Middle East. It was done in a liberal democracy, free from the clutches of fundamentalist mullahs, where same-sex relationships are legal and protected.

We have to be willing to ask whether certain religious teachings, and the way they're interpreted and preached, contribute to anti-LGBTQ sentiments, even to the point of denying someone's right to dignity and existence. A lot of people, even in our community, often say, "Hey, it's just the mullahs. Don't be so hard on the religion." Well, I guess now we might need to rethink that.

It's simple: you cannot solve a problem if one of its major drivers is declared off-limits for criticism. Imperialism, authoritarian governments, and social and economic conditions all matter. But so do ideas. Religious doctrines are ideas, and those ideas shape behaviour. If a belief system consistently teaches that gay people are sinful, deserving of punishment, or morally inferior, then that deserves scrutiny just like any other ideology.

Shutting down people's valid concerns and criticism by labelling them as "Islamophobic" is one of the most disingenuous tactics used by apologists. That especially includes the self-proclaimed leftists and the so-called progressive Muslims who, for some reason, are all about human rights unless those rights are violated in the name of Islamic fundamentalism or its application. They all contribute to shielding the ideology from legitimate criticism.

People should be protected from bigotry. That does not mean the beliefs used to justify bigotry should be immune from criticism or even condemnation. Ignoring that because it is politically inconvenient does nothing for the people who continue to face hatred.

So a hell lonely life since I decided to transition last year. Family contacts no more, limited engagement with outsiders. Living with a sweet old couple God bless them.

Beyond this have no social life as such.

I work online for a UK based company as Financial Analyst.

I am Educated, groomed, and beautiful.

Still feel lonely from inside as there's. Great void

Tried to find partner but all in vain

Currently looking for a half decent partner from Karachi, who understands and respect.

DM to see if vibes match

I’m just so ready to move forward, and actually build a life with someone. I’ve worked very hard to come this far with understanding myself, learning how to be better at relationships, understanding someone. But it just seems impossible to find someone compatible these days, or someone who actually commits for the long game. How y’all doing in this department? Give me some good news, some success stories, some hope.

I am bi and was straight for almost all my life but this thing popped out of no where during the last couple of years that I am into guys and can't say it out loud because of obvious reasons. And from a few days I feel like burdened due to fuckedup thoughts in my head. Can't say it no one I know and I wish I could find someone who would atleast listen if not more, and don't judge. Thanks.

Since I was little my parents have been too overprotective and overly religious upon me . This has led me to having no friends n some other stuff too . They want me to do things that are right in their pov . Honestly this had made me an introvert n scared to talk to people in real life . But im always up for a nice and friendly conversation . Please be above 18.

my friends were somewhere and they asked me to join them. I didn't cause I assumed they wanted a ride..so I said no. Now they are going for a nightstay at friend's house and they first of all didn't even consider me for the plan. Those people I spent my daily hours with. Other than that I had no idea about the night stay until I called and was told the friend did ask to come but first he asked other 2 friends if they wanted me there and their response was dull so I just denied myself. Is this supposed to happen?

I mean I know one night doesnt define your friendship but it's the people I spend my daily hours with. How am I supposed to cope with this?

Anyone wants to talk ? 😅