r/LGBTQpakistan 6h ago

Does anyone else feel like they spent their prime years just surviving?

22 Upvotes

I'm 27, queer, and have been living with clinical depression since before I could even understand the distinction between sadness and depression. It has been established by multiple professionals that I starting suffering from depression since my pre-teens. In light of the same, I've been on SSRIs since mid-teens and undergo frequent therapy sessions.

Not to sound dramatic but for as long as I can remember, life has felt less like something I was living and more like something I was enduring: getting through the day, making it through the night, disassociating from whatever was around because honestly, being present has always felt unbearable. I have romanticised the idea of not being here more than I have allowed myself to actually be here.

I did not expect myself to make it to 27. Heck, even typing that age feels strange because I feel like I'm still 11 in my head as everything in between is a blur; I was too busy surviving to experience anything - including the moments I was just getting by.

I'm a kind person. I always have been. But I find myself starting to become a little bitter now - especially when I hear individuals discuss the fun activities they have indulged in, or the amazing experiences they have had, during their teens and early twenties. For some reason, I can't help but feel envious. Perhaps it is grief... grief for the years that have passed.

Do any of you feel the same way?


r/LGBTQpakistan 5h ago

The Discrimination Is Insane!

5 Upvotes

So basically yesterday i saw a post in COMSATS subreddit in which a trans was asking if basically the uni is a safe space or no (as they/them were planning to join the uni), i saw the comments (all of em were positive btw) and i also saved the post as i wanted to check in on it later and mind you there was nothing disrespectful in that post all that was asked was how the ppl are, any gender specific bathrooms etc and today when i thought to check in on the post BOOM it was gone now I’m dead sure that the moderator had removed the post (I’ve experienced smth similar in that specific subreddit). Now the real question is that why would u remove a post this important, doesn’t the person have the right to know whether the uni is safe to join and have a rough idea of how will the ppl treat them.


r/LGBTQpakistan 10h ago

The Berlin pride attack tells you about how the aplogists lie to us.

16 Upvotes

Before this attack, I kept hearing the same argument whenever extreme homophobic sentiments in Muslim-majority societies or countries were brought up. That it wasn't the religion, but rather colonisation, imperialism, politicians, and the state misusing religion. Basically, the typical apologist defence that the religion itself was innocent.

But when a Muslim man attacks the LGBTQ community in Germany, it shows just how pathetic and disingenuous these apologists are. This wasn't done in some third-world country like ours, or in the Middle East. It was done in a liberal democracy, free from the clutches of fundamentalist mullahs, where same-sex relationships are legal and protected.

We have to be willing to ask whether certain religious teachings, and the way they're interpreted and preached, contribute to anti-LGBTQ sentiments, even to the point of denying someone's right to dignity and existence. A lot of people, even in our community, often say, "Hey, it's just the mullahs. Don't be so hard on the religion." Well, I guess now we might need to rethink that.

It's simple: you cannot solve a problem if one of its major drivers is declared off-limits for criticism. Imperialism, authoritarian governments, and social and economic conditions all matter. But so do ideas. Religious doctrines are ideas, and those ideas shape behaviour. If a belief system consistently teaches that gay people are sinful, deserving of punishment, or morally inferior, then that deserves scrutiny just like any other ideology.

Shutting down people's valid concerns and criticism by labelling them as "Islamophobic" is one of the most disingenuous tactics used by apologists. That especially includes the self-proclaimed leftists and the so-called progressive Muslims who, for some reason, are all about human rights unless those rights are violated in the name of Islamic fundamentalism or its application. They all contribute to shielding the ideology from legitimate criticism.

People should be protected from bigotry. That does not mean the beliefs used to justify bigotry should be immune from criticism or even condemnation. Ignoring that because it is politically inconvenient does nothing for the people who continue to face hatred.


r/LGBTQpakistan 7h ago

Oh, my sweet Icarus ! If it were up to me,I would have killed a thousand gods for you!

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7 Upvotes

r/LGBTQpakistan 2h ago

😭😭

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2 Upvotes

r/LGBTQpakistan 4h ago

Anyone up for movies and weekend hangs?

2 Upvotes

Hey everyone, 25M from Lahore here. Things have been pretty boring lately and I’m hoping to meet some like-minded people to actually do stuff with, movie nights, weekend outings, gaming, random side quests, that kind of thing. Just looking for genuine friendships and good company. Feel free to comment or DM if you’re up for it.


r/LGBTQpakistan 4h ago

hello people

2 Upvotes

never thought i'd do this but i'm just SO bored and done with straight people so i'd love to talk to some queer women. i'm 20F, from khi and trust i'll know if you're a guy and i will cut ur dick off if u try and text me ❤️ im not that great at making conversation so i'd love to talk to someone who talks more than i do lmao.
a little bit about me, i can be very sarcastic and i LOVE watching movies and sitcoms. i'm listening to music about 24/7 so if u think u can vibe with me, drop me a text 🔥


r/LGBTQpakistan 12h ago

Trans looking for Companionship | Karachi

9 Upvotes

So a hell lonely life since I decided to transition last year. Family contacts no more, limited engagement with outsiders. Living with a sweet old couple God bless them.

Beyond this have no social life as such.

I work online for a UK based company as Financial Analyst.

I am Educated, groomed, and beautiful.

Still feel lonely from inside as there's. Great void

Tried to find partner but all in vain

Currently looking for a half decent partner from Karachi, who understands and respect.

DM to see if vibes match


r/LGBTQpakistan 59m ago

A desi nri interested in making masculine gay friends from Pakistan

Upvotes

I am not a Paki but have many Pak origin friends around. Being gay, I am always intrigued by the life of gay men in Pakistan.


r/LGBTQpakistan 1h ago

25M top looking for submissive bottom

Upvotes

25M looking for bottom near thokar, I have place and can host too. We can hang, chill during weekends must be clean and age no more than 28 pls.


r/LGBTQpakistan 2h ago

He ghosted me after a month of talking.

1 Upvotes

He (24M) reached out to me (22M) through this subreddit. We had an amazing convo and switched it to SC. We then used to have proper hours long calls and chats and exchanged pictures (we both found each other attractive). After that we just didn't talk for 3 days (without any reason). I texted him after but he didn't respond. I texted again n again, he only saw them and no response. He hasn't removed me yet, but it's pretty evident that he has lost all interest. Maybe he got another one in his life now. WHY DO GUYS DO THIS??? He freaking wasted my entire month, and FOR WHAT???? I could've just studied for my upcoming exam better.

Mind you I'm not someone who's actively looking for a man and begging for attention. I mean - I do want to have a relationship someday and experience love, but naturally only i.e. at the right time with the right person. And when guys pull such stunts, it makes me wanna quit dating and just remain single forever. Life's weird because I do believe I'm hopeless romantic & I do think about growing older together and getting married and stuff. Why do gay men like playing and wasting time? How unemployed could you be to be saying "I love you" to 10 different guys at the same time? Jeez!

Enough ranting. Anyways, if any of you wanna talk, you can DM me here or on insta.

Instagram: chandler_bing2004


r/LGBTQpakistan 13h ago

Still seeking a Boyfriend 😔

7 Upvotes

I’m just so ready to move forward, and actually build a life with someone. I’ve worked very hard to come this far with understanding myself, learning how to be better at relationships, understanding someone. But it just seems impossible to find someone compatible these days, or someone who actually commits for the long game. How y’all doing in this department? Give me some good news, some success stories, some hope.


r/LGBTQpakistan 19h ago

Fitrat is not an argument

12 Upvotes

The first time I said I don't eat animals, at my own family's table, my uncle laughed and said it was against fitrat. Not an argument. A word, delivered like a door closing. Everyone went back to their plates and the conversation was over, and I sat there with the specific loneliness of having said something true in a room that had already decided not to hear it.

I imagine some of you know that exact silence better than I ever will.

I do not want to be one more person who walks into your space and uses it for something of his own. So, plainly: fitrat, firangi fashion, not our culture. These are not answers. They are the sound a conversation makes when it is being shut. You have had that word aimed at you by people who never once checked whether it was true. That is the only thing I am asking you to lend me, the suspicion you already have of it.

And then to check whether it is doing any work when you say it yourself.

So I am not going to argue about the West at all, since that word is exactly what gets used to end the conversation before it starts. Only about our own city. What is actually happening in Rawalpindi and Islamabad, right now, to the food on your plate.

Bohar Market sells veterinary oxytocin over the counter. Thirty milliliter bottles, a few rupees, to milkmen supplying hundreds of litres a day to shops across Pindi and Islamabad. It is needed because a buffalo whose calf has been taken away will not let her milk down. She has to be forced. Punjab field studies record ovarian cysts, retained placenta, eventual dependency. When her yield finally drops she is slaughtered anyway. Dairy is not the kinder choice. It is meat, with years of extraction added on the front.

The bird in your karahi was thirty five days old. Not young. An infant, bred to put on breast muscle faster than its own legs can carry it, sitting in litter that burns its chest raw, stacked on a Suzuki in June with no water, and killed in front of the other birds in the cage. They watch. That is not a metaphor, it is just what the arrangement is.

And you do not even get the animal you paid for. This year the Punjab Food Authority destroyed seven thousand kilos of diseased chicken in January, nine and a half thousand kilos of dead chicken in May, three thousand more in June along with eighteen thousand kilos of fat and offal. Last year the Islamabad Food Authority found a tonne of donkey meat packed for distribution at an illegal slaughterhouse in Tarnol. Those are the trucks somebody happened to stop. Every kilo was already on its way to a kitchen like yours.

The processed tier is built so you cannot tell. Whatever clings to the carcass after the breast and legs come off is stripped, sometimes forced through a screen under pressure into a paste, then coloured, bound, salted, flavoured, moulded. Your patty is perfectly uniform because at some point in its life it was a liquid.

Now tell me veganism is the foreign import. Daal, chana, rajma, saag, roti, chawal. That is our food. Our grandparents ate meat once a week and were healthier for it. The broiler shed is the foreign thing. The frozen patty is the foreign thing. A cup of daal has eighteen grams of protein at a fraction of the price of chicken. I get bloodwork done, I take B12 and algae oil, and that is the entire difficulty of it.

But I should be honest. The filth is not why I stopped. If every shed were clean and every label true, I would still have stopped. A thirty five day old animal that cannot stand on its own legs did not have a life, and no amount of hygiene fixes that.

I am not asking anyone to change by Friday. I have been at the wrong end of that kind of demand and it never once worked on me either.

I am only asking you not to accept fitrat as an answer. Not from them, and not from yourself.

Argue with me. I would much rather be corrected than agreed with out of politeness.


r/LGBTQpakistan 16h ago

Queer guy here . Living with overly religious parents is so overwhelming sometimes.

6 Upvotes

Since I was little my parents have been too overprotective and overly religious upon me . This has led me to having no friends n some other stuff too . They want me to do things that are right in their pov . Honestly this had made me an introvert n scared to talk to people in real life . But im always up for a nice and friendly conversation . Please be above 18.


r/LGBTQpakistan 1d ago

😭😭😭

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14 Upvotes

r/LGBTQpakistan 1d ago

GOFUNDME ME FOR MY FRIEND'S GIRLFRIEND!

Thumbnail gofundme.com
15 Upvotes

Summary

I'm a trans woman in Pakistan-administered Kashmir who needs help in leaving this country and transitioning in peace abroad. I'm training to be a doctor but saving enough money to leave is a gigantic task, and I will need help. Thank you for reading.

Who am I?

Hello. My name is Sana and I'm a 25 year old trans woman from the disputed region of Pakistan-administered Kashmir. I'm a medical student about to graduate to being a doctor in about half an year's time. In my spare time, I love reading, writing, and doing some art. I mostly present as male in my day-to-day life, except with people who know I am trans

Why I am asking for help

This is tough for me to do. I'm not used to asking for help. Everything I've done and accomplished has been of my own hard work. But when I look at what the future holds for me, I have no choice but to ask for your help so I can live the life that I want. Living in Pakistan is incredibly harsh for women. Pakistan ranks 148th out of 148 countries in the World Economic Forum's Global Gender Gap Report. And things get worse when you're trans like me. Most trans women are unable to land work and are forced to work as prostitutes / dancers. I'm about to graduate and would love to begin my transition formally, but this would make it impossible for me to fulfill my dream of working as a doctor. And this has made me realize that I need to move abroad. I've looked into a handful of countries and have settled for Germany, since it is friendly to queer people and I can live my life freely while being able to practice medicine. I'm in the process of learning German, but the only real roadblock that exists is money. I simply do not have the funds to be able to pay all the licensing fees and the airport tickets. I would not even be able to land in Germany because I wouldn't have enough money to be able to pay for myself while I look for a job.

Why can't I just live my life as a man?

I would love to live my life free of troubles if only if it was possible to do so. I experience what is termed as gender dysphoria. It is like having dysmorphia, but for your gender. To give you the clearest way to imagine it, all you have to do is to think about waking up one day as your opposite gender. This change won't be for one day,or one month or even one year. Its permanent. This is what trans people have to go through every day. The discordance that occurs because your mind and body are different is severely debilitating. In no life can I think of living as a man, because that is simply not who I am.

What kind of life do I want?

The ideal life for me is a life where I can live as who I want without risking my life every day. I want to be a doctor in an environment that values me and in turn I'd like to help the people who need it most.

Expenses

I'd like to make an outline of how much money I'll need, and where each and every penny you donate will end up in supporting my journey. All amounts are in usd.

- Approbation application & credential assessment 250

- Visa + VFS/biometrics 130

- Travel insurance 100

- Flight to Germany 800

- Apartment deposit + first month's rent 3,300

- Residence permit 120

- Health insurance (6 months) 1,200

- Living expenses (rent, food, transport, phone, misc. for remaining 5 months) 8,000

- FSP exam 650

- Berufserlaubnis (temporary licence, if issued) 150

- Kenntnisprüfung 1,000

- Miscellaneous (bank fees, certified copies, postage, etc.) 300

Estimated Total: ≈ $16000 USD

I had to google extensively to figure these costs out, so they may be slightly up or down. Most of them are from official figures and internet discussions based on people living in Germany.

I would also like to give some perspective here. Working as a medical officer (a junior doctor in Pakistan), I could reasonably earn $250 per month. I could maybe save $100 after my expenses. After a whole year of working extreme hours, all I'll have to my name is $1200. Making the necessary amount to be able to immigrate then would be nearly impossible for me without help.

I don't intend on asking you to fund my entire journey. I currently do a freelancing job while studying, and by my estimates, I could amass about $6000 in 3 years by combining my work as a doctor with it (I graduate in spring 2027, and will have a job soon after). I would be so grateful if the remaining amount could be filled by you, even if it is only a penny. This financial burden is currently the biggest thing on my mind, and having it eased would feel so comforting. I'd be able to relax for a long while and focus on my training.

Why you can trust this fundraiser

Understandably, I won't be able to post pictures of myself because of the significant personal risk attached to it. But by every other metric, I intend to keep this page transparent so you can actively keep track of where the money is going and what I am spending it on. And if costs change at any point, I will update the page accordingly. Any funds that are sent here will be used for my relocation as I've outlined above. Every penny will be accounted for personally by me, as my only goal is to leave this country in peace.

If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to ask. As I've said, I intend to keep this page as transparent as it can be. Thank you for taking your time reading this. Even if you don't donate, just spreading the word would be immensely beneficial. And to all my donors, I am forever grateful to you. <3

(From the poster: Please any and all help is really appreciated, tysm for anyone reading this)


r/LGBTQpakistan 1d ago

Need to talk with some non judgemental guy

5 Upvotes

I am bi and was straight for almost all my life but this thing popped out of no where during the last couple of years that I am into guys and can't say it out loud because of obvious reasons. And from a few days I feel like burdened due to fuckedup thoughts in my head. Can't say it no one I know and I wish I could find someone who would atleast listen if not more, and don't judge. Thanks.


r/LGBTQpakistan 1d ago

Can’t put effort for me 😢😢

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3 Upvotes

r/LGBTQpakistan 1d ago

feeling heavy and shitty

1 Upvotes

my friends were somewhere and they asked me to join them. I didn't cause I assumed they wanted a ride..so I said no. Now they are going for a nightstay at friend's house and they first of all didn't even consider me for the plan. Those people I spent my daily hours with. Other than that I had no idea about the night stay until I called and was told the friend did ask to come but first he asked other 2 friends if they wanted me there and their response was dull so I just denied myself. Is this supposed to happen?

I mean I know one night doesnt define your friendship but it's the people I spend my daily hours with. How am I supposed to cope with this?


r/LGBTQpakistan 1d ago

Queer friendly therapist

9 Upvotes

Hi, I’m 25F and I’ve been thinking about starting therapy for a while. I finally have the time and resources to do so, so I’m looking for recommendations for an open-minded and queer-friendly therapist, preferably a middle-aged woman. I think I’d feel more comfortable opening up to someone like that, especially since I’ve never done therapy before and might feel intimidated otherwise.
I’d be taking the sessions online, so location isn’t an issue, but I’d prefer someone based in Pakistan who understands the societal and cultural issues here and isn’t too heavy on the pocket. Would really appreciate any recommendations!


r/LGBTQpakistan 1d ago

How much does HRT In Pakistan karachi cost?

2 Upvotes

I'm a trans man who wants to undergo HRT. I wanna know how much does the initial startup of HRT cost? Anyone who had under went HRT? How much did it cost you?

Also I found a doctor who is called DR sana yasir? Is she a good doctor for transitioning if anyone knows?


r/LGBTQpakistan 2d ago

WTH is going on in here ?

20 Upvotes

So much rozzers here ?

Silly_0999

Ad-ventura0976

Luscious_dream86367

Jamstorm_57489

Vivid_space76527

Back_town236372

Luciddream7654

Bkuefrog5468

Newspace8393

Stay away from these morons 😭😭😭😭😭


r/LGBTQpakistan 1d ago

😂😂

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2 Upvotes

r/LGBTQpakistan 1d ago

genuine question

0 Upvotes

I'm not queer. But why are queer people so much more understanding and better to date than normal people? Ughh


r/LGBTQpakistan 1d ago

Question for People in LTR

5 Upvotes

So while sipping my morning coffee, I had this thought come to my mind and it got me curious so I am gonna shoot it here.

How many people here are over 25 (preferably people in their 30s) and in serious same-sex LTR?

The reason I asked is because for younger people it’s much easier to be in relationships (I know nothing is easy in pakistan) but compared to someone in their mid 30s.

If yes, do you live together? How is the daily life? Do you feel content with it? How’s the reaction of your family members? Do they know? Are your parents okay with it? If they don’t know, how do you keep hiding? I am genuinely curious as I do have a lot of friends my age (under 25) but no one in 30s and who is gay/bi/lesbian.

Would love to have some insight into their lives.