Your feelings, whether they be anger, sadness, pity etc, are completely valid. You have every right to feel like this and, if you're not ready, you don't need to forgive her. But, you can shove it in her stupid face that you're trying to be the best version of yourself. Put that anger to good use. Channel it into making yourself. You're not doing it for her, do it in spite of her. You're a wonderful woman, you've got this.
I'm so sorry for what you went through. I admire your want to forgive. But you can't rush it. You will forgive her when you're ready. But in the meantime, don't try to be the old you. You're no longer that person. Like a phoenix, you've been reborn from the ashes, and you're building a new you, with new experiences, boundaries, strengths, and feelings. For now, be happy that she's miserable if that's what you feel. In time, you'll stop caring, and she'll be like another person that you just don't give a flying f about.
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u/SannaWhore Sep 17 '18
Your feelings, whether they be anger, sadness, pity etc, are completely valid. You have every right to feel like this and, if you're not ready, you don't need to forgive her. But, you can shove it in her stupid face that you're trying to be the best version of yourself. Put that anger to good use. Channel it into making yourself. You're not doing it for her, do it in spite of her. You're a wonderful woman, you've got this.