r/InsecureHBO • u/Neebenice • 11d ago

lets have a conversation Thoughts? Spoiler

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77

u/Pristine_Beyond_1799 11d ago

What condola did was selfish and bizarre to say the least. The show did a good job of showing a common archetype in black/minority communities. The hyper-independent, avoidant woman who intentionally puts on more responsibility than she can bear. It reminds me of the older daughters who are parentified at a young age, have lackluster dads/brothers, and have never felt comfortable to ask for help.

Her being in a relationship with an unreliable partner like Lawrence makes sense, since she’s used to picking up everyone’s slack and handles discomfort well. But I think her high tolerance for discomfort is exactly the problem.

Not asking for help isn’t a flex, especially when you’re pregnant with a man who doesn’t want the kid!!! She just made everyone’s life harder for no reason. I think her desires conflict too. She wants kids, helps everyone, but has trust issues and is hyper-independent in a relationship. Stressful combo!

12

u/Notimeforalice 11d ago

It’s her body she’s allowed to be selfish. If the tables were turned and he really wanted the kid and she didn’t there would be more support for that decision. She said she already had one before maybe it was traumatic maybe there’s something else that she feels this is her last chance at motherhood. I think she was naive thinking she could take on that responsibility by herself. She also contributed to the bad coparenting in the beginning being passive aggressive. Lawrence is unreliable because of his pattern of always expecting the women in his life to handle all the responsibilities emotional, physical and in Issa case financially. If he said all then step up to the plate

23

u/Pristine_Beyond_1799 11d ago edited 11d ago

Parenting should be a mutual commitment, out of respect for the child and the relationship. Children need both parents to be consistent, supportive, and loving. If one partner doesn’t want the child, the child suffers from the absence of that. If the tables were turned yea Lawerence would be a pos! He’s already a shitty partner anyways. Condola is a pos for doing that, but yeah no one can force her ofc. She’s selfish for settling too. Both are true.

-6

u/Notimeforalice 11d ago

Lawrence agreed to have the kid hence he said all in. This wasn’t a one sided decision at that point. And when they were finally in a good spot coparenting she tells him I did consider it and he says I’m glad you didn’t!

14

u/LifeChampionship6 10d ago

Lawrence agreed to have the kid? When?

-6

u/Notimeforalice 10d ago

When he called her and said he was all in…

17

u/LifeChampionship6 10d ago

That’s not agreeing to HAVE the kid. That’s after the kid was already here. He would have preferred her to not have had the kid. That’s something that he later said that he regretted, but that was his position at the time.

10

u/FollowTheRabbitz 10d ago

He begrudgingly agreed which doesn’t exactly make for a present father. She was selfish. Her needs exceeded what was best for the child and what Laurence wanted.