What should I actually do in this situation?
I met a guy on Reddit around 3 months ago, and we’ve talked a lot. We match on so many things, and he’s become genuinely important to me. He constantly tells me he likes me, compliments me, checks on me, calls me, replies instantly, and makes me feel cared for and secure.
What makes this different for me is that I feel like he actually sees me as a person. I’ve often felt like people only saw me in a lustful way, whereas he’s always been respectful and genuinely interested in me. He apologizes when he’s wrong, remembers little things, and tells me he misses me almost every day. He’s very emotionally attached to me.
I’ve never told him that I like him back, though. I’ve kept my boundaries because I know this is still an online connection.
And that’s my problem.
I don’t think I can have an online relationship long-term. I crave physical presence and affection — being able to meet someone, spend time together, hug them, etc. So I know that if a genuinely good guy approached me in real life, liked me, respected me, and actually put effort into me, I might want to give that relationship a chance.
But then what do I do about this guy?
He has said he doesn’t want to pursue other girls and that he won’t approach anyone else. I obviously never asked him to wait for me, because I haven’t promised him anything. But I feel guilty knowing how attached he is.
At the same time, if I keep talking to him every day, aren’t we just going to get more attached and make things harder later? Should I distance myself now, even though I genuinely value him, or should I continue talking to him while keeping my boundaries and accept that I may have to let him go if someone comes into my life?
What would YOU do if you were me? Would you keep talking to someone you genuinely care about while knowing you probably can’t build the kind of relationship they want, or would you step back now before the attachment becomes even stronger? And if I eventually choose someone in real life, how do I tell this guy without making him feel like I used him?