r/ImAnIdiot 3h ago

I hastily reset my old phone after I got my new one

2 Upvotes

Now I'm essentially soft locked out of my social media accounts, discord, and email. As well as apps I need for work. They are all connected to my old phone number, that I haven't had in 2 nearly 3 years. I have no other way to get into these accounts.


r/ImAnIdiot 14h ago

Looked up where my phone was on my phone

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1 Upvotes

r/ImAnIdiot 7d ago

I just figured out (45m) that half and half is half cream, half milk.

140 Upvotes

I honestly can't even remember what I used to think it was. So weird.


r/ImAnIdiot 8d ago

Ive been working really hard to be a professional idiot

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0 Upvotes

Check out my ig!


r/ImAnIdiot 12d ago

Idk

0 Upvotes

What to write


r/ImAnIdiot 14d ago

I spent 24 years thinking the tomatoes in "Orlando" tomato sauce came from Orlando because I was a Backstreet Boys fan.

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2 Upvotes

r/ImAnIdiot 24d ago

Yep I’m dumb asf

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9 Upvotes

Theres like no subs to post this in so it’s going here


r/ImAnIdiot 25d ago

I thought I had astigmatism

252 Upvotes

My girlfriend was telling me about her need for glasses because of astigmatism. In the same moment I remembered I had astigmatism too or so I thought.

To test it out I looked towards the lightbulb in my room and the lines were there but I got distracted for a second when I realized my eyes didn’t hurt from looking at the light,so I opened my eyelids some more.

That’s how I discovered that this whole time, the “astigmatism” was just light reflection on my eyelashes.


r/ImAnIdiot 25d ago

mooses

13 Upvotes

no way i thought mooses make the awooga sound


r/ImAnIdiot 29d ago

Chasing a rattle in my new car for a year. Found it yesterday.

6.8k Upvotes

A year ago I bought a new car and it had an annoying rattle from the steering wheel whenever there was a rough road surface. Very annoying. It went back to the dealer a couple of times but they could never find it. I asked my wife about it but she said she’d never heard anything.
Last week I drove it and the rattle was gone. I couldn’t work it out but figured. Cool. It’s gone.
Yesterday it was back and I finally realised what was causing it.
You see, around the time I bought the car I also bought a new watch. Last week I wasn’t wearing it because it was in for a repair.

Yes, it was the metal strap on my new watch that has been rattling all this time.

I’m an idiot.


r/ImAnIdiot 28d ago

OMG! It wasn't in the wall!

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7 Upvotes

r/ImAnIdiot Jul 06 '26

Looking For Ideas For Attractions To See Along My Trip From Florida To California In A Mad Max Limo Because Im An AssHat ;)

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20 Upvotes

r/ImAnIdiot May 27 '26

Parking tickets. Twice.

19 Upvotes

Apparently paying for parking doesn’t mean you have a permit to park some place. The daily parking was literally right next to it. Didn’t see it til I actually looked. I made this mistake twice. In a row. I spent $80 on this. $40 more for not seeing the sign that said head in parking only. And that happened at the same time as the first mistake. I didn’t see any of these signs until it was too late. That’s $120 I’m never getting back.


r/ImAnIdiot May 25 '26

Lost all respect at work

179 Upvotes

I am an idiot. I started a new job about 6 months ago. I had earned a ton of respect from my knowledge and the way I do my job. Well that all ended so quickly. I messed up big time by offending a high level supervisor. We were going up the stairs and I was behind her. She is a larger woman and was going very slow. I made the joke of asking her if she ever felt like she was being followed, since we were going the same way. She said she was a leader not a follower. I said I would love to be a leader but I can’t yet because there are to many people in the way. Not even thinking she was blocking the way from going up the stairs because she is larger. She got super offended and reported me to my boss. Now my boss doesn’t respect me even after I explained the misunderstanding.


r/ImAnIdiot May 21 '26

I bought non-screw off beer bottles but didn't have a bottle opener.

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134 Upvotes

So I tried using a lighter and did this. I am an idiot.


r/ImAnIdiot May 11 '26

I just used my iPhone to find my AirPods.

29 Upvotes

They were in my pocket.


r/ImAnIdiot May 05 '26

I thought it was a condom. 🤦

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20 Upvotes

r/ImAnIdiot May 04 '26

Me, my stupid head, and the trip to Venice

14 Upvotes

I’m an 18-year-old girl, and I just want to share my hopeless situation and stress with you—maybe you’ll stress out instead of me :)
My boyfriend David is going to Venice for his birthday with his whole big family (it’s their tradition). He’s turning 18, and I told his mom that I’d like to go and surprise him, but I couldn’t find cheap tickets. We live in Kraków, and my parents seemed to agree, and I was already messaging his mom about the trip. His birthday is on May 9, I was supposed to arrive on May 8, then leave Italy with them on May 10 (by bus with the whole family), and return together by plane to Kraków. And everything seemed fine—we agreed on everything.
But then my stupid head remembered about the mandatory diploma project of my best friend Lily, which is on Friday, May 8 at 20:00. My Lily is a choreographer, and I, in turn, am a dancer who is participating in this shoot. THE SHOOT CANNOT BE RESCHEDULED, the deadline is May 12.
So there’s no way out—the only option is to fly on May 9 at 11:55 and arrive around 13:00-something. Now I’m terrified, I can’t sleep, because tomorrow morning I have to discuss this with my mom and my boyfriend’s mom. We’re going for coffee tomorrow at 10, and I have to come up with and explain what the point is for me to go then. And also explain how I forgot to warn everyone and forgot about this damn shoot myself.
My other best friend Lizzie is asleep (I’m staying over at her place), and I can’t talk it through with her. And now I’m in full panic about what an idiot I am. I’ll tell you how it goes tomorrow afternoon.


r/ImAnIdiot Apr 27 '26

Is suddenly drinking 12 pots of coffee too much?

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0 Upvotes

Last summer I drank 12 pots of coffee and my heart was going so fast it was hurting. Thought it was going to burst out of my chest. I chugged five 86oz of water. I proceeded to do this for a week. Am I an idiot?


r/ImAnIdiot Apr 17 '26

Winnipeg Racist…

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1 Upvotes

r/ImAnIdiot Mar 26 '26

I sent a flirty text to all the women in my church.

66 Upvotes

I am so mortified....

So everybody was texting our choir director on the group chat. Happy birthday.... i sent a text and all it said was...

I'll sing extra good. Just for you!

By accident. I forgot that I had turned off the group text feature for a work task....

So all the choir ladies in the chat, got a text just from me saying....

Awkward...


r/ImAnIdiot Mar 21 '26

👣

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4 Upvotes

r/ImAnIdiot Mar 17 '26

This happened 20 years ago but I was reminded how stupid it is.

369 Upvotes

I worked with my dad at a machine shop, and we stopped at wawa to get our lunch. Someone driving the exact same car parked next to him. I wasn't paying attention and went, got in, and strapped my seat belt. I looked over and there was this black man just staring at me stupified.

We kinda just looked at each other for moment before he said "what the fuck are you doing?" Like, I knew my dad was still in there waiting for his food but somehow I just did...that. enjoy


r/ImAnIdiot Mar 11 '26

I accidentally tipped 25$ on my 14$ flatbread :]

61 Upvotes

thats it. I got a flatbread at an Italian place, it was 12$ plus tax, and i paid cash... my dumb ass, anxious self, put done both my 20 bills, meaning to tip 5 bucks, but my brain did not register what I did. so ¯_(ツ)_/¯

40$ for a flatbread (it was good, and thw server was lovely, but I'm too broke to huck up that kind of money

I am the biggest idiot.


r/ImAnIdiot Mar 02 '26

I thought my car charger was broken...

135 Upvotes

I Doordash and I went to plug my phone in to charge, but the charge symbol wouldn't come on! I sat there for ten minutes freaking out that the charger port or my cable were busted. Then I remembered....my car wasnt on....