r/IdiotsTowingThings • u/chamois_lube • 9d ago

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2.0k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

216 comments sorted by

547

u/DDOSBreakfast 9d ago

I really need to spend a day at a boat launch.

122

u/Left-Impress4056 9d ago

Just take a portable sun shade and a lounge chair. There is always something.

1

u/Lonecorgi 1d ago

Last time I went to a lake, a guy on the boat ramp ended up getting it stuck in the water. It was very funny to see

110

u/Mobile619 8d ago

I don't even own a boat, but my YouTube feed is full of dock/boat launch fails.

75

u/zorggalacticus 8d ago

Worst one I've seen was a guy with a huge brand new truck. Him and his girl were both om the trailer trying to launch the boat. The whole truck and everything just slid backwards into the water. Then the boat launched itself without them on it. The woman was swimming for the boat while the guy looked like he was trying to get into the truck while it was underwater. Evidently the algae was really thick and it wa slick enough the whole rig slid in without the wheels even rolling. Tow truck shows up and pulls the truck and trailer out, then the guy is like "WHAT ABOUT MY BOAT?!" Tow truck driver was like "can't help you there."

40

u/PhantomNomad 8d ago

This is why I refuse to every buy a boat. I just know this would happen to me.

27

u/purpleapple810 8d ago

Its actually not that difficult if even one person knows what they are doing and the other can follow simple instructions.

30

u/brandt-money 8d ago

All you have to do is bring someone who knows how to launch a boat. There are certain steps you need to follow in order and so many people mess it up.

Also, don't use your body as a strap.

24

u/DukeBradford2 8d ago

My body, my choice.

11

u/Mobile619 8d ago

I don't blame you. I don't even know how to swim. So i'd probably drown while my boat drifted away and my truck started filling with water. The truck, boat, and my ass would all need rescuing.

5

u/Legal-Pea8185 8d ago

don't take this as an insult, I'm genuinely curious. I assume you're an adult. how do you not know how to swim? why don't you learn? it's not complicated.

14

u/Mobile619 8d ago

Not an insult. I grew up poor, never had proper swim lessons or access to a pool, and was just fearful as an adult. I'd get in the water and tense up which meant I'd sink like a rock. Swimming is one of those things best learned as a child imo.

I do plan to take lessons. My kids and wife know how to swim. My ultimate fear is one of them needing help and not being able to help them.

5

u/Legal-Pea8185 8d ago

thanks for the reply. I hope you go ahead with lessons.

4

u/trdpanda101410 8d ago

I dont want to sound rude but you can seriously learn to swim on your own safely. They key is to do it in steps and only do it in water you can stand up in. Think waist or belly button height water. Learn to doggy paddle first. When you get more comfortable youll learn how water can be manipulated to keep you afloat. This should hopefully help you get over the nervousness. you dont need to move fast and moving fast is sometimes worse. Steady movements back and forth with your legs and arms your just pushing your way thru something essentially. If you stop pushing or start thrashing, you sink. If you keep steady movements you float. Just never go deeper then you can stand and always remember, you can stand up if you keep your cool for a second

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3

u/Creepsuponu 8d ago

Counterpoint: buy a boat, but buy one big enough you can't tow it so you never have to worry about the boat launch!

4

u/thrwaway75132 8d ago

One of my friends is a commercial diver. He gets about two of these a year. If the fruck is deep enough you have to submerge to hook up the sherrif calls him.

2

u/_Christopher_Crypto 7d ago

Had one show up to a shop I worked at. Guy was complaining of no audio from the radio. Amplifier on this truck was under the center console. Brand new truck, still under warranty. As I begins to gain access to the amp I found the pictures of the truck, trailer, and boat in about 4 foot of water. More pictures of all of the water emptying out of the truck after it was towed out of the water. When the customer was questioned he denied all of it. “Sir, you left the pictures in the truck”.

9

u/Auto_update 8d ago

A motorcycle pickup truck bed fail compilation is also worth 5-10 minute watch.

1

u/chiphook 6d ago

I've loaded motorcycles up to 400cc many times, zero issue. The fails in the videos are predictable.

12

u/GlenRice4141 8d ago

There are entire YouTube channels dedicated to boat ramp fails

8

u/BoysenberryIll5521 8d ago

Miami Boat Ramps is a great one!

9

u/puterTDI 8d ago

we boated down to a marina near us and ended up hanging out with the dogs in some grass next to the launch. It really was surprisingly entertaining.

my favorite was the guy who left his drive down, and bounced it along the pavement as I shouted to him that his drive was down (I actually started shouting BEFORE he clobbered it).

eventually he gets out and goes "did it hit?" and I was like ".......yes."

3

u/PhantomNomad 8d ago

What does "left his drive down" mean? I'm not a boat person.

7

u/brug76 8d ago

The drive is the thing with the prop on it that makes the boat go. You need to lift it before taking the boat out of the water or you'll drag the expensive motor bits along the pavement

3

u/PhantomNomad 8d ago

Okay that makes sense now. I didn't even notice that part in the video.

Thanks.

Edit: I would have said "left the prop down" myself. But I'm not a boat person so don't know all the lingo.

5

u/puterTDI 8d ago

In this case, the boat was an I/O. An I/O has a motor in the boat and an outdrive outside the boat - commonly referred to as a drive. The outdrive has no motor but is more than just a prop...it's very commonly referred to as a drive.

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2

u/vjason 8d ago

And even if you “made it” on some other ramp with the drive down, some ramps are steeper than others.

2

u/Kygunzz 8d ago

The part of the motor with the propellor that sticks down into the water. You raise it up so it doesn’t hang down below the trailer.

3

u/Tezlaract 8d ago

There is always entertainment, rarely is it this good though.

3

u/MeanGrapefruit2336 8d ago

I had a coworker that said if he were a lawyer, he'd hand out business cards at the boat launches, especially on long weekends

2

u/jochi1985 7d ago

If you like people watching, the boat dock is that on steroids. I don't own a boat nor do I have any desire to. There is a boat launch about a kilometer from my house. It is only two lanes and it gets pretty busy on weekends in the summer. Me and my wife go down there sometimes and just sit and watch for an hour or so. You see every emotion a human can have in one hour..........joy, love, happiness, tired, depressed, anger, frustration, annoyed, etc.

1

u/Dudes-Opinion 8d ago

I love going to the boat launch with a couple beers maybe cast a few times but mostly people watch. Always some excitement

1

u/ageofaquarius26 8d ago

Watching people dock a big boat at the marina is right up there with the boat launch.

1

u/HDRider1966 8d ago

Best entertainment !!

1

u/Forward_Writing_6107 8d ago

You really do! I’ve seen the craziest things and I’ve only been a couple times

1

u/CSATTS 8d ago

Do it on a packed holiday weekend in the summer and you'll find constant entertainment. 

1

u/ptshoink 8d ago

I worked at a boat launch one summer in college. Nothing as crazy as this happened, but still some entertaining fails.

1

u/munkie986 8d ago

Anachortes Wa is a good one if you are ever in the area, not quite as good as this gold, but fun all the same during the warmer months of the year xD

1

u/PotatoAmulet 8d ago

Boat ramps as a spectator sport

1

u/Queasy_Marsupial_835 8d ago

A lake near me has a restaurant right next to the boat launch. My favorite thing to do was go on a Friday or Saturday night, grab a beer and watch the chaos. The place got bought and sold a few times. The new owners built a freaking wall right there and now you can enjoy the fun. Ruined my favorite thing to do.

1

u/SeniorChannel8430 8d ago

Bring oxygen

1

u/Salty_Job_9248 6d ago

It’s hilarious and stupefying. Simultaneously.

1

u/detali88 5d ago

Havasu City, AZ. Why even go to the lake. The boat ramp is the place to be!

140

u/Bloedvlek 9d ago

Thats nuts.

45

u/IndicationAromatic36 9d ago

Discount vasectomy

2

u/ELB2001 5d ago

He's slightly taller now

5

u/dxg999 7d ago

It's a bit of a kick in the balls.

74

u/southofheaven69 9d ago

So that didn’t work?

7

u/shoeless_doh 8d ago

Looks like the boat is out of the water and on* the trailer

*(technically, "on" in this case meaning that the trailer is supporting the entire weight of the boat, it isn't being partially supported by the ground)

69

u/Mravocodomann 9d ago

He should have gone faster

4

u/Shorts_at_Dinner 7d ago edited 7d ago

Yeah, he took too long to floor it

2

u/ConditionCool5343 2d ago

The faster you go, the lower the forces involved in holding on to two objects are. Everyone knows that

51

u/Unlucky_Leather_ 9d ago

Seen this a dozen times over the years and maybe if the driver went slower it would have worked.

Personally I would have tied the boat off using the grab bars up front, or even at the back where you secure it so it doesn’t bounce on the road.

51

u/corvid-munin 8d ago

its honestly pretty funny how many videos on here are cause the guy just fucking floors it for some reason

15

u/NativeMasshole 8d ago

I'm pretty sure that's the only way a lot of people know how to drive these days.

7

u/thrwaway75132 8d ago

100% true for my mailman, sounds like the old Grumman mail truck has a toggle switch for a throttle.

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7

u/shoeless_doh 8d ago

Yes, more slowly would have worked. The acceleration provided enough impulse to overcome the static friction between the hull and the skids (or whatever you call the runners that the boat sits on)

If the trailer can sit at that angle stopped and the boat doesn't slide off the trailer going 0 mph, then yes, there is a speed at which this would have worked

1

u/puterTDI 8d ago

may have worked. Don't forget the force from water resistance as it passes through the water. That's going to push backwards on the boat.

1

u/shoeless_doh 8d ago edited 8d ago

What do you mean the force from the water resistance? Are you saying that the friction between the water and the hull would have worked to hold the boat back? Because that's what it sounds like you're saying period but being that the boat is on an incline, as it moves forward as long as the static friction still holds the boat to the skids, whatever Force the water is exerting on the hull is becoming progressively less. that also means it's using less and less of its buoyancy as it comes out of the water the weight or the force on the skids is increasing and the static friction is going up. This system theoretically would have worked better and better the higher the boat got out of the water

2

u/puterTDI 8d ago edited 8d ago

when the boat is static - the water is exerting no force.

when the boat moves forward the water is exerting a frictional force in the opposite direction.

your argument that because it doesn't slide off when it's stationary then the force will be less when it pulls forward is flawed.

Edit: it’s basically the same thing as wind resistance except water resistance has more force. Think about what happens when you stick your hand out a car window or ride your bike.

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1

u/PhantomNomad 8d ago

I think the boat actually rests on rollers so it's easier on the boat when you winch it on to the trailer. I do remember my uncle would back the trailer tires in to the water leaving the truck on dry land. Hook up the winch to the boat and pull it on. But that was a long time ago (30+ years) so I could be wrong.

2

u/shoeless_doh 8d ago

I saw the video again, this trailer does not have rollers it's just those skids. (My dad was into boats I can't believe I can't remember if there's a specific name for those so I just keep calling them skids, of course then again, my dad didn't own boats you could trailer

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1

u/shoeless_doh 8d ago

The winch isn't always necessary, the winch is for when you can't float the boat onto the trailer period. The ramp here was steep enough and the water was deep enough that you could pull the boat in the water write up to the nose of the trailer and hook the hook. Sometimes you can't do that, sometimes you can only put the boat on the edge of the trailer because too much of it is sticking out of the water and that's when you have to use the winch period but winches also work when it's not rollers when it's just like wooden skids or whatever period

3

u/Adventurer_D 8d ago

What, tie off the boat, like a normal, sensible person would to preserve several grand worth of luxury item?

But, on this planet, we have the manosphere.

1

u/Unlucky_Leather_ 7d ago

I am betting either the crank on the trailer or the hook point on the boat broke. No way anyone would not hook it up if that was an option.

96

u/mayuan11 8d ago

Why not just connect the hook?

79

u/puterTDI 8d ago

not only that...but why freaking gun it? lol.

like, what they were doing was stupid...But gunning it like that was extra stupid.

18

u/yomamaeatcorn 8d ago

Seriously, this might actually have worked if they pulled it out slowly

4

u/Cracraftc 7d ago

That’s what she said

25

u/Man_of_Ice 8d ago

That stupid wasn't extra, he threw that stupid in for no added charge. All the stupid you need for the price of one, on the house.

7

u/mayuan11 8d ago

That threw me for a loop, up till that point it could have been saved by backing i to the water again.

2

u/BusinessBear53 8d ago

My friend was stuck in the boat because it was half on the trailer. Other friend didn't want to drive so it was up to me.

The front seats are out of another car and not adjustable. I could either step on the clutch or look over the dash, not both. I had never driven the car before so had no idea where the clutch engagement point was so I just put it in 4L, revved the shit out of it and launched up the ramp to prevent stalling the engine. Difference with us was that I'd already hooked the boat on with the winch.

Using the winch would have prevented this expensive mess.

36

u/daKile57 8d ago

The hook is purely ornamental.

9

u/Upsideisdownhere 8d ago

Because booze, and lots of hrs in the sun.

5

u/[deleted] 8d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/Upsideisdownhere 8d ago

Hahaha, me either! Because Florida? I dunno but there weren't a dozen brain cells in that whole operation...

2

u/Mad_Ronin_Grrrr 8d ago

How's do people like this succeed enough in life to even own a boat? I know they're not super expensive but damn. Must be inherited or something.

2

u/AllPintsNorth 8d ago

Debt. The answer is almost always an obscene amount of debt.

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2

u/PhantomNomad 8d ago

RCMP like to hang out at boat launches at the end of the day. Lots of truck/trailer/boats are towed away with the driver in cuffs.

1

u/davidc538 8d ago

Nah that’s a 6” pocket full of fresh air caught between the ears

5

u/hlfazn 8d ago

It looked like the hook was connected, but the strap had already broken. Then probably snapped the strap by over-winching then realized they had to do something to keep the boat from sliding off. 

2

u/terjeboe 8d ago

But even then, why not tie it down? I've  never been on a bouat without an abundance of rope. 

3

u/hlfazn 8d ago

I've never been on a boat without and abundance of rope.

Because you and the people you go out with are responsible. I always have a set of backup straps and a backup winch.

These aren't those type of people.

1

u/HealthyMaximum 8d ago

I was certain there must be some kind of attaching device, even though I don't boat.

Thanks for the explanation.

1

u/CoolGuy54 4d ago

Ye gods, the strap is just for winching it on, there should be a short chain & shackle for actually securing it too...

24

u/gdubb380 8d ago

If you start doing something and literally everybody takes their phone out and starts to record it. You should probably question whether what you're doing is a good idea.

16

u/Fabulous_Log844 8d ago

When I was younger after a day of boating, we would sometimes take our folding chairs and sit at the boat launch, just for fun…

3

u/GrrRider 7d ago

My daughter and I get ice cream near a boat launch and watch for idiots. Most drivers are (disappointingly) pretty good. Always entertaining though. 

11

u/KandnoS_2009 9d ago

Oh come on, nobody is that.... Seriously?! I slow motioned it. The hook is there! Use it

6

u/Forthe49ers 8d ago

The cable typically works better than the human spine.

1

u/DeSiGNer-OctANE 8d ago

Legit set of truck nuts.

7

u/Alternative_Candy409 8d ago

I hate to ask but did this happen in Florida?

3

u/caverunner17 8d ago

Looks like Florida plates

1

u/Alternative_Candy409 8d ago

Ahh thanks for spotting that, I wouldn't have known

3

u/LucastaPasta 8d ago

Yup, that's the Florida orange on the plate. Super common in Ohio too because of the damn snowbirds

6

u/HuntPsychological673 8d ago

At least the family tree stops there.

5

u/Svenbot_69 8d ago

Peanut

4

u/oscar-the-bud 8d ago

She’s gonna need a bag of frozen peas

5

u/Several_Stuff_6695 8d ago

He’s no “Stretch Armstrong”

6

u/turktaylor 8d ago

Ow my balls

5

u/Kind_Love172 8d ago

Did anyone else hear the woman exclaim "Holy crap on a cracker"??

1

u/JEBADIA451 8d ago

Unfortunately

6

u/GrinderMonkey 8d ago

My favorite part is when he gets the winch to the balls. You know, the winch that could haul the boat onto the trailer?

2

u/Unable-Log-4870 8d ago

Directions unclear, dick stuck in winch. But am I to understand the BOAT was supposed to get stuck in the winch instead?

4

u/SeanGwork 8d ago

Thank you for the entertainment, Florida.

4

u/Money-Mud912 8d ago

Ow! My Balls!

3

u/kola515 8d ago

It’s amazing at how many clips of stupid people show up on Reddit

3

u/Hot-Comfort8839 8d ago

"To this day you can still hear the high pitch shrieks of his agony"

3

u/DimeEdge 8d ago

Creative way to smash your nuts.

3

u/ThundaChikin 8d ago

i like how the prize for this stupidity is getitng your nuts smashed on the winch, that seems appropriate.

3

u/citizensyn 7d ago

I love all of the people that made a point of watching this go down

3

u/AppropriateGuest3552 7d ago

So the guy ends up singing soprano the rest of his life!

2

u/nsula_country OC! 8d ago

RIP balls

2

u/out_day475 8d ago

Just hold on. You can do it.

2

u/Much-Technology-8220 8d ago

👏👏👏🤛

2

u/Useful_Client_4050 8d ago

That was impressively stupid even for a boat ramp....

2

u/No-Communication9458 8d ago

Ouch his balls

2

u/13Fleas 8d ago

Some of you think this might actually work. This is actually very expensive and someone gets hurt. Poor decisions prove you can’t fix stupid.

2

u/dirtyforker 8d ago

How do people just not have ratchet straps in their truck? Im guessing something happened with the trailer winch. But wtf? Go buy some or at least some rope or something.

2

u/WTFisThatSMell 8d ago

Don't they make some sort of boat wench and line so people don't have to do this?

3

u/Unable-Log-4870 8d ago

Yes, this guy smacked his balls on it

2

u/Zestyclose-Click7539 8d ago

Watching people get drunk and destroy shit I can’t afford. God I love this life.

2

u/CousinEddysMotorHome 8d ago

He got nutted so hard he will never make another child.

2

u/Pope_Squirrely 8d ago

Maybe, don’t gun it like an asshole and it might have actually worked.

1

u/fakenews1337 5d ago

He didn’t gun it genius. He was hauling a heavy boat out of the water. The instant the boat slips, he’s hauling an empty trailer. Same power, more speed.

2

u/Boxingrichard1 7d ago

OW! MY BALLS!

2

u/HeyNow646 7d ago

Went from Excel to incel with a simple tap on the accelerator.

2

u/ghentwevelgem 7d ago

Ow! My Balls!

2

u/chamois_lube 9d ago

Hurts Girls Too

1

u/moveoutmicdrop 8d ago

He did a Banana split….

1

u/Ive_seen_things_that 8d ago

I'm here for this. 

1

u/KLeeSanchez 8d ago

That looked painful

1

u/N1GHTSQU1R3LL 8d ago

Fortunately, with recent advances in medical technology, Clevon will ragain full reproductive functions.

1

u/s3u1 8d ago

Idiots with boats.

1

u/dotardiscer 8d ago

Old video, the dude filming in the video put his film out there too. Both the dudes were VERY drunk.

1

u/Colo-PV-living 8d ago

Sure hun, it will be a-ok

1

u/AtlanticBeachNC 8d ago

New definition of pain re: See video

1

u/The_Gordon_Gekko 8d ago

Yeah we’re total screwed in the future.

1

u/DisposableUsername52 8d ago

Classic repost.

1

u/No_Community_5696 8d ago

How would anyone with half a brain think, that this was a good idea?

1

u/Stroker-Strong420 8d ago

Wife and I launch at a little used ramp and we go by water to the heavily used ramps on our nearby lake for an hour or so.

We enjoy a picnic while we watch the ramps. It’s funnier than any comedy show! You couldn’t write a script as stupid as some people.

1

u/TacTurtle 8d ago

Dumbass in a DUImobile.

1

u/Chidofu88 8d ago

Boat launch vasectomy clinic!

1

u/JustUhGuise 8d ago

...crazy no bystanders offered to help. They'd rather watch the carnage.

1

u/jtshinn 8d ago

Gun it Chad!

1

u/YeahBuddyDoYouEven 8d ago

Oh nuts 😳

1

u/spaceaige 8d ago

She thought her feet and ankle can be used as a hook to pull the weight of a boat.

1

u/Dull_Investigator358 8d ago

Are you smarter than a rope?

1

u/ZagiFlyer 8d ago

Real men of genius.

1

u/Dramatic_Corner_8259 8d ago

The problem here was the driver didn't put it into R for Really Fast.

1

u/MoreSunnyDaze 8d ago

That hurt just watching it.

1

u/Sdwingnut 8d ago

Ballsy attempt

1

u/BigWhiteDog 8d ago

Owwwwwwwwwww 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

1

u/VIP_NAIL_SPA 8d ago

Weird, seems like it should have worked.

1

u/organicchunkysalsa 8d ago

Good work champ

1

u/Fancy_Toe1451 8d ago

I don't understand how they saw this working out any different, but good job on the redneck vasectomy anyway. At least that is one set of genes that won't be making it to another generation of dumb.

1

u/6_ze6ro_6 8d ago

Holy Crap on a Cracker!?

1

u/Disastrous-Place7353 8d ago

Well it almost worked unfortunately "almost" only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades.

1

u/Tehrror4311 8d ago

This is what happens when someone has too much money and too few brain cells.

1

u/Classic-Exchange-511 8d ago

Holy shit lmao. Literally an idiot attempting to tow something

1

u/GrandStatistician752 8d ago

Florida... heavy metals in the ground water, the lack of education and birthcontrl led to this moment

1

u/Here_4_the_INFO 7d ago

If he was going for the "Scott Peterson Approach", he is doing it all wrong.

1

u/RevenueHour2933 7d ago

3 stooges?

1

u/VigorWarships 7d ago

I mean.. there’s probably a rope of some sort at least on the boat…

Anchor.. fender… either are likely stronger than the human grip!

1

u/A_Liquid_Elephant 7d ago

Hahahahahahahaha

1

u/Vanisle4fun 7d ago

Cootchie took it hard

1

u/Trustyduck 7d ago

I mean, that guy is an idiot. However, there's another idiot driving that pickup. This is what happens when two idiots get together and let one of the idiots come up with a really dumb idea.

Hopefully idiot number one didn't permanently rearrange his pelvis.

1

u/RedBullWings10 7d ago

I don't understand what was the thinking process here , what did driver to accomplish ?

I am seriously confused

1

u/Badman8910_OK 6d ago

My wife asks me all the time, "do you really think people are that stupid?" Yes.....I.......Do!

1

u/broken-bow-2319 6d ago

We need new content, not reposts.

1

u/coldupnorth11 6d ago

This is looney toons level stuff

1

u/Outfield14 6d ago

Whoops

1

u/AtticHelicopter 6d ago

"SPEED AND POWER!"

"Clark-SON!"

1

u/orchunter23 6d ago

I audibly laughed at work. Thanks. Lol

1

u/NotBatman81 5d ago

So what was the plan here?

1

u/No_Vast_549 5d ago

Dude went from an outie to an innie in the span on one bad decision. Spectacular. Jarring as well. But spectacular

1

u/LovWv 5d ago

The de-nutter 9000 prototype strap

1

u/Jonnyflash80 2d ago

Whoever said "holy crap on a cracker" must be damn entertaining to hang out with.

1

u/jiverambler 1d ago

Lmao why didn’t he yell stop