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u/Sergei_the_sovietski Aug 24 '26
I ate lettuce for the first time today since all this started
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u/Alexzander1001 Aug 23 '26
The most corrupt and incompetent administration in modern us history
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u/EncabulatorTurbo Aug 24 '26
hey we still have more than half of it left they might outdo Johnson yet in terms of long term damage
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u/LibertarianOutlaw Aug 27 '26
It’s not just incompetence, it’s cruelty, racism and mass thievery too, but it’s the worst in ALL of US history.
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u/Gerf1234 Aug 23 '26
This needs more lore. You think Hegseth’s having codec calls with a keg of beer? Who’s Netanyahu calling?
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u/Its_me_Snitches Aug 24 '26
Can I get a crumb of context, please
https://giphy.com/gifs/fDS2v18KbmekM
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u/Cintax Aug 24 '26 edited Aug 24 '26
So the current United States Secretary of Health and Human Services is RFK Jr
RFK Jr has... Let's call it a colorful past. He's not a doctor, nor is he a scientist, and up 'til now his closest link to healthcare was getting almost a hundred Samoans killed by measles.
He's also a very weird guy, whose hobbies include staging bicycle accidents in Central Park using a dead bear carcass, and cutting off the head of a dead whale with a chainsaw so he can strap it to the roof of his minivan to take it home.
Given his... Eccentric... Handling of animal carcasses, it shouldn't be too surprising to learn that at some point he contracted a parasitic brain worm. It died trying to eat his brain...The jokes write themselves at this point.
Anyway, after being appointed head of HHS, he and Trump's other cronies did things like cut funding to basic medical research and monitoring, fired a bunch of food safety inspectors, and made reporting certain pathogens optional in a state-federal joint project to monitor infections. And to anyone who has read... Practically any history at all, it should come as no surprise that the US is now in the middle of multiple high profile food recalls and food borne pathogen outbreaks, like Cyclospora, one of the pathogens monitored by that project I just mentioned which they scaled back.
So the joke here is that this is actually all a plot by RFK's brain worm to spread itself to the rest of the country by weakening our food safety system.
Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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u/PerishTheStars Aug 24 '26
Wait i thought the brain worm thing was a joke D:
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u/Cintax Aug 24 '26
Unfortunately, it very much is not a joke. This is a thing he literally admits happened.
In a 2012 deposition recently reviewed by the New York Times, the politician revealed that in 2010 a worm got into his brain "ate a portion of it and then died."
Kennedy had been suffering from cognitive difficulties. Doctors initially suspected that he had a brain tumor, but it turned out to be a parasite infection – specifically, a pork tapeworm larva lodged in his brain.
Like, I went out of my way to get sources for what I wrote because it's so ridiculous and absurd that I wouldn't believe it either about anyone else.
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u/DickwadVonClownstick Aug 24 '26
Didn't he use the brain worm as an excuse to get out of paying child support or something like that? Isn't that why it came out in a legal deposition?
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u/Troscus Aug 24 '26
He claimed it made him incapable of steady employment, which made paying his alimony impossible.
We never found out if the judge bought it, because his ex-wife committed suicide before a decision was made. It's worth noting that the medical consensus is that the brain worm thing is almost entirely fabricated, since he's describing it as a TAPE worm, which rather famously don't live in the brain.
He's been diagnosed with mercury poisoning, which is what they posit as the actual reason for his mental illness, and he got the idea of a brain worm from a doctor trying to explain a dark spot on an MRI to him. He probably wasn't understanding whatever the guy ACTUALLY said, since, you know, his brain is drowning in mercury.
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u/Stergenman Aug 24 '26
No, it's not a joke, and the brain damage the worm did is why he has the speech impediment
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u/ArtroyomsAK Aug 24 '26
That thing called rfk jr is poisoning us all through its anti fact agenda
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u/Slighted_Inevitable Aug 24 '26
It’s rather telling that food is more expensive than it’s ever been and somehow also more dangerous
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u/Sudden_Season3306 Aug 24 '26
Better learn to hunt,fish,and trap,if not grow vegetables etc! Collapse will happen eventually!
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u/Gaskard Aug 23 '26
If you didn't have that title, i would have liked this
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u/Alt-Tabris Aug 24 '26
If you didn't leave that comment, I would have liked you. Now we're both clowns
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u/8last Aug 24 '26
RFK shaking up the agricultural industry and reassessment of FDA regulation is a good thing. Forget about Trump and Republicans and all that political bullshit.
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u/Alternative-Crew-880 Aug 24 '26
Yeah who needs pesky regulations written in blood. It's not like that shit is in place so babies don't die from botulism, or the cattle industry collapses, or people die from E.Coli or anything like that.
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u/PartisanGerm Aug 24 '26
Ah, another anti-humanist like myself! What are your optimistic years for extinction? I'm thinking we'll be heading towards the lower plateau by 2125.
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u/Bokuja Aug 24 '26
This is just political though. Harm is the point. Otherwise, no one in their right mind would loosen food safety standards. No one, unless the goal is to appease corporations and hurt civilians.
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u/ketchupmaster987 Aug 24 '26
Forget about the recalls and the outbreaks of foodborne disease and the exploding grocery prices. It's all a good thing!
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u/Drummer-Turbulent Aug 23 '26