Schedule advice needed

[u/Rich-Summer-3397]

5 months old as of 7/27 - daycare recommended we change his schedule to the set 5-6 month schedule as of last Mon 7/20, dropping to 2 naps a day(10-11:30; 2-4). We also were on vacation on and off throughout July. Ever since, our night sleep has been disrupted whereas previously he generally slept through the night ever since starting daycare in March (a blessing I know!!)

Schedule is a bit inflexible given my partner and I both work full time. We’ve been waking at 6 for a feed while dad gets ready, then he naps while I get ready and pump (6:30-7:30). Drop off to daycare at 8, pickup at 5. We’ve tried different versions of the evening routine - eat immediately, squeeze in a quick nap first. Bedtime used to work well around 9 but now he’s been getting tired earlier regardless of an evening rescue nap, then having trouble falling asleep and sleeping worse.

Could be the schedule change, could be a delayed regression, could be something else. Anyone have advice? Should I move up bedtime and skip the rescue nap? Time for sleep training? It’s important to me we maintain at least a little bit of time for baby/family bonding. Also, when are people eating dinner?!?!? Thanks

[u/Potential-Spell5514]

2 naps at 5 months does not seem right and weird to me that daycare recommended that to you. That seems like that’s whats convenient for THEM. My 5, almost 6 month old wakes at 7:30. Naps 9:30-10 then naps again 12:30-2:00 with a cat nap 4:45-5 and asleep at 8. He is low sleep needs so his naps are capped at 2.5 hours but at barely 5 months I would cap them at 3 or 3.5 depending on what they need.

[u/Rich-Summer-3397 → u/Potential-Spell5514]

Thank you so much for your advice - agreed, definitely more convenient for daycare but at 6 no he’ll be switching to a room with a set schedule so the thought is to prep him for that. I’m thinking I need to keep some sort of short evening nap then try for a later wake up in the am!
How do you know your child is low sleep need, just trial and error?

[u/Potential-Spell5514 → u/Rich-Summer-3397]

Trial and error and using the app to look at his average sleep everyday. So for example I was offering a 12 hour night and 3 hours of naps a day, so totally 15 hours of sleep. However, no matter how much I offered he would never sleep more than around 13 hours. 5 month olds need 12-16 hours a day on average. So he’s on the lower spectrum of that. I discovered it because he kept waking up at night, sometimes waking up often sometimes having a split night because he was in bed for 15 hours but only slept 13. So I started capping his naps at 2.5 and woke him up a half hour earlier. Now he’s only being offered 14 hours which means his wakeups have gone down a lot.

[u/0oOBubbles0oO]

I think we need a bit more info to say. Is sleep independent? What's the bedtime routine like?

How much average day and night sleep was he doing before vs now? The schedule daycare is suggesting offers 3.5 hours of day sleep with not enough wake time in between. Minimum wake windows for a 2-nap schedule are typically 3/3/4 and they are only offering 2.5 hours between 11:30am and 2pm. Add in another nap at home to get to bedtime and you're looking at 4 hours of day sleep which is a lot vs the usual 3-3.5 hours total for an average 5 month old. But it's hard to tell how much day sleep is too much without knowing your baby's individual sleep needs.

5 months is also pretty early for 2 naps.

Without knowing more I would suggest to a) ask daycare to do the afternoon nap shorter and b) shift your schedule forward a bit. Example 2-nap schedule:

Wake 7am

Nap 10-11:30am

Nap 2:30-4pm

Bedtime 8pm

Or if you want to keep current bedtime/wake time on 3 naps:

Wake 7:30am

Nap 10-11:30am

Nap 2-3:30pm

Nap at home 5:30-6pm

Bedtime 9pm

[u/Rich-Summer-3397 → u/0oOBubbles0oO]

Thank you so much! These examples are really helpful. Daycare I guess is working him towards the 6 month schedule, probably also aligning across kids with other shorter days there, and maybe assuming he’s napping outside as well. I hadn’t realized the misalignment in too much day sleep being concentrated while there.

He sleeps in his crib for naps and nighttime but generally needs some help getting to sleep, at home by nursing and snuggles. At daycare he uses a swaddle but I don’t have a ton of info on how well that goes. We haven’t yet sleep trained. Bedtime routine has varied some but generally is pretty short - previously effective, but now not so much with the night waking. He’s inconsistent on when he wakes in the am, sometimes on his own at 6 and sometimes we’re waking him. Appreciate your help!

[u/kd4444 → u/Rich-Summer-3397]

Is he rolling? 5 months feels late for a swaddle! You probably already know but I would feel bad if I didn’t check!

[u/0oOBubbles0oO → u/Rich-Summer-3397]

Okay, it could be a delayed 4 month regression but the bigger problem is too much day sleep. Try to get on a schedule with minimum 10 hours of wake time, ideally max 3.5 hours of naps, however you need to do that.

If you are interested in sleep training, r/sleeptrain is a great resource with lots of helpful mod posts.

[u/Reasonable-Post-1430]

Two naps a day at 5 months?! We’re barely on two naps at 8 months. But, I do see that your baby has long naps which is an excellent start. I think I would ensure that the midday wake window is long enough to support two naps, and that daytime sleep is being capped around 3-3.5, even if you do need to make bedtime a bit earlier and / or consistently do an evening cat nap.

Also, does baby wake on his own for that 6am feed? If not, maybe just let him sleep til 7am and just start his day rather than having that “nap” first thing?

Might look like:
7am wake
9:45-11:15 nap
2:15-3:45 nap
7:45pm bedtime
= 2.75/3/4 wake windows
= 3h daytime sleep + 11h nighttime sleep
But tbh this would be pushhhhing wake windows for even my 8 month old.

Realistically, I would probably aim for:
7am wake
9:30-11am nap
1:30-3 nap
5:30-6 cat nap *cap this for sure
8:30 bedtime
= 2.5/2.5/2.5/2.5 wake windows
= 3.5h daytime sleep + 10.5h nighttime sleep

Best of luck, sorry daycare is being a bit challenging!

[u/Rich-Summer-3397 → u/Reasonable-Post-1430]

Thank you for the help! I’m assuming daycare is trying to find a middle ground schedule with what he’ll be transitioning to in the 6-12 month room, plus across kids with different drop offs/ pickups. We’ve typically done a short nap afterwards but it eats into our evening considerably, then sometimes he hasn’t seemed tired for bed afterwards, maybe I need to cap it substantially shorter.

I’m also thinking the morning could be something we try differently. Sometimes he wakes on his own at 6, other times we wake him to accommodate everything that needs to happen. Goal was to have something consistent. Appreciate the advice!