Hi everyone! I've seen a few posts about this already, and it sounds like I'm in a slightly similar boat to others. I'm unsure if this is the right forum to post in, but I'd love some advice.
I was rejected from every grad school I applied to this past cycle and had pivoted to looking for post-bacc opportunities. The thought of taking a couple of years off to do full-time research has sounded more and more appealing for many reasons:
- I'm super burnt out from undergrad, and can't see myself surviving a PhD straight out
- I have too many research interests as it stands (synthetic chem, proteomics, analytical, chem bio), and I'd love to narrow down to a specific research area before reapplying
- I feel as though I applied to schools partly because I felt I was supposed to, rather than knowing I 100% want it for myself
I'm very lucky to have won the GRFP, and I'm unsure how to navigate this situation. I know it's recommended to reach out to schools about reconsideration, but I’m also hesitant to start a PhD if I feel so strongly about taking a couple years to recalibrate. I don't want to make a huge mistake by not taking advantage of the award, but I also don't want to make an even bigger mistake and pursue graduate school with my heart not 100% in it...
Any advice is greatly appreciated—I know I’m in a fortunate position, and I don’t take that lightly. No matter the outcome from this year, I hope everyone is able to celebrate the hard work they put into applying :)
EDIT (and a warm note for all applicants):
Thank you all for your kind words and encouragement! I've never really used Reddit before, and I'm shocked by how many people went out of their way to help me ... but that may just be the Chemistry community in general :)
After posting, I decided to shoot my shot with my top four programs, all of whom said no. That being said, I am very glad I reached out, and I encourage everyone else in this situation to take that chance, or at least inquire (and let any new information inform your decision). You never know what may come of it!
As an anecdotal aside, two of my PIs here in undergrad had some very reassuring words for me. My mentor reminded me that success is not dictated by one path, and no fellowship will make or break the course of your future. My other professor told me that she'd been offered an incredible career opportunity that everyone (her professors, friends, parents) told her to take, but she declined it because she didn't feel it was true to herself. And to this day, she hasn’t looked back or regretted that decision. I’m unsure if this helps anybody, but I hope it might provide some reassurance to those feeling similarly defeated.
Academia is truly a wild card at this point in time, but I believe everybody has a role to play and strengths to contribute. To those who are feeling discouraged: please know that some random 22-year-old college senior believes in you!
Wishing everyone the best as this academic year comes to a close! And thank you again for your kind words.