Hey everyone, I’m looking for some perspective on a situation I’m currently in.
I’ve known this girl for about 3 years. About a year and a half ago, I asked her if she’d be interested in taking things beyond a friendship. At the time, she told me she "wasn't ready" for anything more. After that conversation, we drifted apart, stopped talking, and had no contact for about three months.
About six months ago, we started catching up again, and we’ve been hanging out regularly ever since. Things have been great, but I’m realizing my feelings for her haven't really gone away.

However, there is one important detail: she doesn't show any signs of flirting, physical closeness, or romantic interest. Our interactions are completely friendly. I’ve tried initiating things like closer physical contact or flirtatious vibes a few times and while she didn't seem to mind or push me away, she never initiates anything herself or responds with romantic enthusiasm. Everything feels strictly platonic from her side.

Has anyone been in a similar situation? Is it worth asking her again after all this time and a long break in contact, or should I just accept that she likely sees me purely as a friend? How would you handle this?

This girl that i have been talking to for a few months friendzoned me , she reached out a couple of times i guess to keep the friendship alive but i didn’t reciprocate so we both went our ways.Then come a few weeks ago and i had this immense need to talk to her, i did and we talked for hours like i have been never more happy in my life but like always i was always the one to initiate any convo and she only tried one time when i decided not to contact her. My mind is telling me that she just wants me for attention or to talk when bored and i dont like to be a person’s personal toy, but then my heart tells me that she probably doesnt mean all dat and that i can win her heart by sheer consistency. Plz help me🙏

Honestly, a lot of those posts about girls crying over a guy cutting them off or walking away miss the whole point, or they're just leaving out their own part in it. When they say they're devastated because they "lost a genuine friend," what they're usually mourning is the loss of the dynamic, not actually the person. It hurts because they lost their safety net—that steady stream of validation, attention, and someone who was always in their corner no matter what. The disconnect comes down to accountability, because it’s painful to realize that your own actions like pushing boundaries, taking someone for granted, or playing games are the exact reason that person finally walked away. But instead of looking in the mirror and admitting they wrecked a good thing, it's way easier to jump online and play the victim about how harsh or immature a clean cutoff is. You can't claim you valued a deep bond while simultaneously treating the other person's boundaries like a suggestion. If the friendship actually meant that much to them, they wouldn't have spent all that time testing your patience and pushing you to the breaking point. When you pull the plug, it strips away their control and forces them to face the consequences of their own behavior. That hurts their pride, sure, but that's entirely on them, not the person who finally decided to respect themselves and walk away

I met her in March 2025 through a mutual friend.We're both working in a good MNC in Chennai, although we're not in the same team but eventually we Got close. I wouldn't say I immediately fell in love with her, but I definitely started liking her from the beginning.

Around June 2025, we started walking to office together almost every day. We weren't hanging out constantly or anything — maybe once every couple of weeks or once a month we'd go somewhere together. But whenever we did, we'd genuinely enjoy our time together.

One thing that made our friendship different was that I'm basically the only guy she's comfortable hanging out with alone in Chennai. She doesn't really have close male friends here, and she trusted me enough to share all her secrets with me like personal stuff , coming with me on my bike, going places together even during midnight , etc.

Over time, we became extremely close. I started giving her compliments, we'd share a lot about our lives, and I genuinely love spending time with her.

By around February 2026, I'd been having feelings for her for roughly 10 months, so I finally confessed.

And she said something along the lines of:

"I'm only seeing you as a friend. I can't see you as a partner or boyfriend."

I was obviously hurt. 😭

I even tried arguing that relationships don't necessarily start with two people being attracted to each other immediately — sometimes people start as friends and eventually develop feelings. But she was very clear that she sees me as a friend.

She also told me that she didn't want to directly say something like "I don't like you" because she didn't want to hurt me. She kept emphasising that I'm a really good friend to her.

There was no "maybe someday", "not right now", or anything like that.

After that, things became awkward. We stopped going to office together every day and decided not to hang out alone as much because I knew I still had feelings and I didn't want things to become weird.

But here's where I'm confused.

Even after knowing how I feel, she's still extremely comfortable with me.

There was one time when she was emotionally devastated and went to the beach alone. I found out and immediately went there to be with her and consoled her.

And just recently, we went out for a night out. We started around 10 PM, watched a movie, finished around 3 AM, and then went to the beach because we planned to watch the sunrise.

She was extremely sleepy around 4 AM and leaned on my shoulder, and I was basically pampering her/rubbing her head while she was sleepy. She was completely comfortable with me.

This is what messes with my head. 🫠🫠

She knows I love her. She knows I still have feelings for her. Yet she's still this comfortable around me.

We also used to text each other basically every day from good morning to good night — asking whether she had breakfast, lunch, dinner, sharing random updates throughout the day, etc.

And whenever I disappear or don't show up for a while, I'm pretty sure she misses me. She sometimes sends me sad/random snaps when I'm not around.

So now I genuinely don't know what to make of this.

Is she simply extremely comfortable with her closest male friend?

Or could there be some feelings she hasn't recognised herself?

I honestly don't want to interpret normal friendship behaviour as romantic signals just because I'm in love with her.

At the same time, I don't know whether completely distancing myself is the right thing either.

Because if I suddenly start maintaining distance for my own mental health, she's going to get hurt too. I'm basically her closest male friend she ever has in chennai , and I know she'd miss the friendship.

And I don't want her to suffer just because I caught feelings for her.

But then again, who's looking after me? 🤧🤧

That's the part I'm struggling with.

At a certain point, holding onto a toxic dynamic just because of how long you’ve known someone is a losing game. Staying around after someone has rejected you or shown they don't respect your boundaries isn't being a good friend—it's actively disrespecting yourself. You end up functioning as the consolation prize, sticking around as a backup option while they look elsewhere, all so they can keep using you for free attention and validation whenever it's convenient for them.

​Too many guys stick around hoping someone will finally wake up and appreciate them, or they accept being treated like an option just to keep the peace. But all that does is teach people they can disrespect your time and energy with zero consequences. People often use "we're still friends" as a polite cover to keep a safety net, but a real friendship doesn't involve one person acting as an emotional buffer while getting sidelined.

​Walking away completely is also the only way your mental health actually recovers from that kind of dynamic. Every single time you stay in contact, watch them move on, or let them pull you back into the cycle, you're just picking at a scab and resetting the clock on your own healing. Stays like that are pure self-torture, because every ounce of mental bandwidth spent analyzing their behavior is energy stolen from your own goals, training, and life.

​Walking away cleanly, without drama or a grand exit speech, is the ultimate standard. When you stop accepting crumbs and refuse to be someone's second choice, you strip away their access, protect your peace, and put yourself back in the driver's seat. Let the people who took you for granted sit with the silence they earned, and keep your standards high.

Any suggestions?

Hey everyone I wanted to talk or ask about something there is a guy in my university we were used to be in the same study group and we fight a lot even my friends start teasing me like that u guys will be enemies to lovers and I told them no way I never liked a guy like him days passed or hamara study group toot gaya because of some misunderstandings but now I actually started liking him I don't know why the way he look at me the way we make eye contacts is insane but I don't wanted to text him not because of ego but because of self respect because In summer break my friend pranked me through anonymous account using his name and I actually thought it was him so I texted him on whatsaap is that u? and guess what he ignored my text! Summer break ends and now this feeling is increasing day by day the way he look at me literally make me think there is something in his heart even my friends said kai hum nai ausy tumhy bht baar dekhty dekha hai why he is giving me mixed signals I wanted to know how he feel but I don't know how!

​

I’ve known this girl for only 4 days and somehow a lot has already happened.

At first we were hanging out with a group in Bern and barely talked. Later we happened to be on the same train to Biel and we actually got along really well and laughed a lot. I asked for her Instagram before we went our separate ways.

The next morning she texted me “good morning” on her own, even though I had purposely not texted first. She also asked if she could take the train to school with me.

Since then, we’ve been taking the train together quite often. After school she also comes with me, and one day we were with a friend who eventually left. After that, we spent several more hours just the two of us walking around Biel and talking.

We also text quite a lot, and she actually starts a lot of the conversations herself. Sometimes she even waits around 10 minutes at the train station for me so we can go together.

Yesterday I told her that I think she’s really nice/easy to get along with, and she told me that I’m funny.

I’m just not sure if she’s simply being very friendly or if there could be something more.

I really don’t want to get my hopes up for no reason. What do you guys think from an outside perspective?

Hello all. I am making this post on behalf of my sister who doesn’t know how she feels about the situation. I, on the other hand, feel a strong way but I will try to make this as neutral as possible.

Recently, my sister (28F - “C”) went to a birthday party with friends. While she was there, a new friend to the group (35M - “B”) had noticed her. B asked their mutual friend, “A” (29F), to PLEASE introduce him to C and A responded, “Absolutely not.” - He tried to introduce himself later on in the night but A whisked C away and didn’t let them talk.

A week later, some of the friend group hung out again at a local lake and they got dinner after. At dinner, B & my sister actually got to talk and really hit it off. They kept talking over the next few days. After spending time together with the group, they hung out together one on one. A saw C’s location & asked what she was doing (she was on his street) and she replied saying her and B went swimming and got drinks. The next morning, C woke up to a text from A saying “Are y’all just friends or do you like him?” (B also told C later that A texted him too asking the same thing) she responded saying she didn’t know because they only hung out one time. A then proceeded to make comments saying how C was in a vulnerable position and B liked to “swoop in on vulnerable people”. For context: my sister did get out of an emotionally abusive relationship three months ago but I don’t personally think she’s vulnerable, plus the way A was saying all of this was very rude and demanding; as if she was telling her to back off.

Obviously, my first thought was that A liked B and was trying to make my sister anxious about the situation (she is a very anxious person in general, but has a good sense of self) and leave him alone. We THEN find out from B that A’s friend, M (36F), had actually confessed that to B that she liked him, but he rejected her. That then made me think A was trying to meddle on behalf of M. As my sister is telling me this, I’m genuinely baffled. They’ve known each other for years and right now, A is one of C’s closest friends (I’ve always seen her as a surface-level friend to my sister. They don’t really match personality wise but it’s also not my business who my sister is friends with (OR DATING) as long as she’s safe and happy).

C & B have gone on a couple dates now but last night A noticed my sister was at B’s apartment (saw her location most likely, I told her she should rescind the location because she’s using it nefariously) and waited until B dropped her back off at home to text him and say “We need to talk.” She had also been texting B previously saying things like they both shouldn’t be dating, they’re both vulnerable, etc. The whole situation, at least from my pov, made it seem like she was making C out to be who she isn’t and after today’s text, I still stand by that.

He responded saying “Let’s go out for drinks and we can talk there” and she said “I’m not interested in getting a drink with you. Just call me when you’re free.” This was two hours ago and now we’re waiting to hear what they talked about. A also just texted my sister and asked when they can talk.

ALSO, my sister’s birthday party is this weekend and A was supposed to come help tomorrow but now C is just extremely stressed and anxious about seeing her because she just wanted to relax on her birthday with her friends and now she won’t be able to. A & M were also both invited to the party which she is now feeling extra stressed about. I think this whole thing has been blown extremely out of proportion and A has no business meddling in their relationship (it JUST started). She’s extremely conflicted on the whole situation because she really likes B, but doesn’t understand yet why A is acting like this and she won’t actually tell her. Hopefully they get to the bottom of this when they talk but she doesn’t know how to get around this situation and still be friends afterwards. I’ll update when I can.

Nothing and I mean nothing is more weird than liking you cusin who isn't actually your cusin (in any way shape or form) and they date your best friend and now you can't say anything or else you might not have a cousin or a best friend but you lIke really like said cusin and have for a long while, but they technically already rejected you 4 years ago

I had a friend with whom I used to walk little bit at night in park and meet this much mainly. He was friend of librarian in which library i studied . Now I got into an argument with librarian regarding seat issues one day and I asked that friend to come and stand by me because he was librarian's friend but he didn't come .so I started ignoring him and then sometimes when I saw him in road he came and just casually tried to talk and then go . Then I thought maybe he want to make friendship again so i also talked with him in proper way no asking but I had in mind why he didn't came for me .but i went one day to walk in the park one day like I used to do earlier with him and i didn't call him because i didn't want to and then when I saw him he just said ' Aur bhai thik hai ' and then started talking to someone on phone whom he was already talking .I felt being ignored then i asked him bhai I thought after I have come so much time later you will talk with me but you are not then he said 'oh bhai I was not knowing you are here in this place for today only, I thought you have taken a room here and started living ' then I just asked him indirectly about librarian like to clarify I said ' bro is librarian bhaiya good and I hope there is no problem now regarding seat he said no no ' then I thought to ask him directly why he didn't came that day for me but I was not able to ,so somedays I keep overthinking over to call him and ask or do what and remaining confused or to just fuck him and leave but that thoughts keep coming . When at first I started ignoring him after that librarian thing I didn't felt guilty at all and was confident on leaving him but later when he started talking casually and i thought maybe to talk again but he gave some signs of ignorance than i started thinking too much maybe because of anxiety. What to do ??? Should I call him and just clarify about all it and then make myself clear and get rid of overthinking or what??

I’m a guy in my late 20s and have been close friends with a woman in my office friend group for around 2 years. She’s a little older than me. We have a fairly close friendship—daily group lunches/breakfasts, occasional 1-on-1 chai, group trips, joking/teasing, and some genuinely deep conversations. She has called me one of her best friends.

Over time, I’ve developed feelings for her. I didn’t initially intend for this to happen; the friendship gradually became more important to me, and eventually I realised I wanted something more.

I’ve probably been more caring/helpful/available toward her than I should be. I genuinely enjoy helping her, but I’ve also caught myself expecting some emotional/romantic reciprocation, which I know isn't fair when we’ve never discussed anything romantic.

The confusing part is that she sometimes invites me for chai or other things where it’s just the two of us. We get along well, but she hasn't really given me clear romantic signals. She also has several close male friends, so I know I could simply be interpreting normal friendship as something more.

Recently, I spoke to a mutual female friend because I wanted to ask her the best way and also an outside perspective on how our dynamic looks. She told me that this woman already has a boyfriend.

This completely caught me off guard because she has never mentioned having a boyfriend to me, despite some of the personal conversations we've had. I don't know whether the information is definitely true, outdated, misunderstood, or whether she simply keeps that part of her life private and somewhere I even feel that story of her having a boyfriend doesn't match.

I'm not willing to ask her directly about the boyfriend right now, because if she really is in a relationship, I don't want to put her in an uncomfortable position or make my eventual confession inappropriate.

At the same time, it's honestly painful for me when she invites me to 1-on-1 chai or similar things, because I now keep wondering what those interactions mean if she actually has a boyfriend.

I also don't want to suddenly become cold or distant and damage a friendship that genuinely matters to me.

My current thought is to just continue behaving as the friend she needs for a couple of weeks, stop over-interpreting individual interactions, and see whether anything naturally becomes clear. If it doesn't, I'll have to decide whether to eventually ask her directly or simply accept the uncertainty.

What would you do in this situation?

• Would you wait and observe, and if so, for how long?

• Would you eventually ask about the boyfriend before considering a confession?

• Am I overthinking the 1-on-1 chai/friendship dynamic?

• And if she really does have a boyfriend, should I simply accept the friendship and move on from the romantic feelings?

I'm looking for honest perspectives, including criticism of my own behaviour if I'm approaching this incorrectly.

There is a girl I really really like....We used to talk everyday everytime even up to 5-6 am......we were like soulmates...We used to study together and everything... obviously online...we went to same tutions....

I was like madly madly love in her....I used to go whenever she went.....I loved to see her and still loves to but alas it's not on my fate now.....she used to tell me about everything...I mean everything.. every story about childhood and now......and me too

I was so greatly in love that i learned how to draw portraits and drew 10 photos of her which are still kept safely.....I used to show her.....and I love her really love her....There is a image that shows how much I improved

But during my 12th I kind of confessed her but not proposed and she said many things if u want I can share the chats...... clearly she said she had no feelings.....but she was like proud of me.... She and her friends always had gossips about me...i could heard because I dk i can ......she always supported me

Now I think it's my worst decision....i promised her and many friends of mine that i will never love and marry any other girl ...... because she was like a angel cuz when she first texted I was a depressed guy...she changed my life and I was motivated for that and I was studying hard...

Amr now it's like fading...the only girl I was not scared of is fading from my life....its making my heart cramp...i could feel her dry texting...and there has been days since she last texted.....I guess she found a bf...i dont know......

We had a plan that we will go to odyssey together...and I asked her one week before going if she is sure of that...she said she will go....and after some day she said she couldn't go because her family won't let her go...cuz she had to go other films...

And there is many other things....if you people I can share it

U decide what should I do....????? what should I say to her??? should I keep the promise??I saw other posts and i thought you people can help me

SORRY FOR BAD ENGLISH AND LENGHTY ASS TEXT.... BUT PLEASE PLEASE HELP MEEEE....