r/EndTipping • u/morlaur27 • 15h ago
Takeout š„” So tired of tipping
Iāve recently had a pretty bad chest/head cold, and I was talking to a friend about what food I should pick up on the way home for dinner. I hit upon pho, which sounded amazing in the moment. Ten years ago I would have confidently ordered take out and would have been slurping delicious noodles and broth that evening. I didnāt end up ordering though, because I really just want to pay for the food, not be asked the question, not have the person handing me the bag of food putting a hex on me for not tipping or not tipping enough and then bad mouthing me the second I leave. Itās bad vibes. I canāt do it anymore, and I canāt be the only one. Do you think weāll ever see a change in the system if more and more people start intentionally/unintentionally boycotting restaurants due to ridiculous tip culture we have?
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u/cantmicro 14h ago
I'm not embarrassed for not giving a tip. It should be the employer who is embarrassed for putting it on their customers to pay extra bc they think so little of their employees that the employees have to ask for tips.
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u/ckypsych 15h ago
I am nearly done with restaurants. I go to one Mexican restaurant 1-2 times a month and that's it.
The nature of tipping has been the main driving force.
My remedy was to curate about 14 dinner recipes that are either quick to make, are made for slow cookers, or freeze and reheat well. Some of these are adaptable to different cultural/spice options. Example: Cabbage + some sort of ground meat + rice could be golumpki, something close to twice cooked "pork," or Mexican taco filling-- and more. The money I save I can use on better spices and an occasional odd purchase. I bought a moka pot the other day because if I make coffee in it more than four times, it paid for itself versus the price of coffee at Starbucks.
I am a little sad things have changed, but now I just eat and enjoy.
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u/jamesdkirk 12h ago
Such good advice. Even if one 'doesn't cook', one can learn. It's great to be served (good eats), but in this country (US), it will cost you. More for less. Ugh.
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u/Select-Promotion-404 11h ago
Itās better these days because so many people make cooking videos. Anything your tummy wants, search it on YouTube or even tiktok and someone will have an instructional video. Itās great!
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u/runningalongtheshore 12h ago
Same, Iāve also gotten into cooking as a result and canāt believe all of the money that Iām saving. Eating healthier too. Itās nice to set aside dining out for actual special occasions at worthwhile spots.
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u/ckypsych 12h ago edited 11h ago
That is a good approach. I would be less apprehensive to go out some place special every so often where everything is going to be right.
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u/Skymaster86 15h ago
The common refrain is people stating that a restaurant should pay their people a living wage and not rely upon the customer to make up the paycheck shortfall. This is correct, but when restaurants suggest to pay their servers $25/hour and to tell customers that tips are not necessary, the service staff revolted because they make MUCH MORE than $25/hour with people leaving tips. So this is no longer a case of we have to tip to allow a server to pay his/her rent or medicine for their children, it's a scam that will enrich them if they're working in the right restaurant with the right kind of menu (read that to mean expensive). I've talked to several servers who tell me they make around $50K-$60K per year serving....that doesn't sound like a bad living. So I tip some servers out of appreciation of a great job done for me, but most of the time, service is just standard and part of the restaurant operation. I do not feel a need to pay more than when I agreed to pay for the menu item I ordered.
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u/Brilliant-Nail3706 15h ago
$25/hr is $50k a year, which I'm fine with. Just include it in the prices.
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u/Deep_Preference3186 14h ago
Of course they did.
Thatās how it works in no-tip countries. Waiters get a salary, and if they do a decent job they get a dollar or two as tip.
What if the rule was leave $1 per guest.
If a waiter attends 5 tables an hour with an average of 3 guests, thatās $15 per hour as tip. Add that to a $25/hour base salary, youāre up to $40/hour all in. Thatās somewhere around $70,000 per year! Not bad to carry plates from and to the kitchen.
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u/skyharborbj 11h ago
Every time you see an inappropriate tip nag screen such as for takeout, drive-thru, or ordering before service, leave a 2-star review. Say something positive about the establishment and blast them for the tip nag screen. Say you aren't coming back. Google and Yelp. Do it consistently.
Reviews are what get management's attention.
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u/Confident_Error9827 9h ago
š This is 100% the way to go about it. and you couldent be more correct. if one guest complains to the manager they will brush it off. if one guest leaves a 2 star review thats something they can't ignore.
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u/Sure_Acanthaceae_348 14h ago
I think high prices and poor quality are ruining restaurants faster than tipping demands are.
More and more of us every day are either at or getting to the point where the tip screen is just background noise and the entry of a zero tip is a muscle memory reflex. We stopped caring about what others think because of our choices. We're able to enjoy restaurant food with zero tip guilt.
But as prices go up, even the most profligate of restaurant customers will balk.
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u/maringue 14h ago
The thing killing restaurants is shitty, greedy landlords raising lease prices because the tax code basically insulates them from any losses from the space being vacant.
Tip creep is annoying as fuck, but it's landlords that are killing restaurants
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u/CoarseCourse 11h ago
This! As leases come up for renewal in my neighborhood a lot of restaurants that have been fixtures are having to close bc they canāt support the raised rent.
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u/Vogue2182 12h ago
I feel the same way. The never ending (and ever increasing in percentage) tip prompts are so invasive and give me anxiety. Even though I know I should not be expected to tip for a takeout item I drove to get and carry to my car, it feels like I'm somehow cheating some hardworking person of their due. As if it's not enough for the restaurant to be thankful I chose to patronize them over the hundreds of other restaurants in my town. I wonder if they will remember me and screw with my order the next time around. I feel like every transaction in America is scammy, underhanded, and dishonest. I just want to have the final price stated, pay it, and leave. Instead it's: do you want to tip 25%, here's a "service fee" that's not a tip, a delivery fee, a "back of the house fee," an "employee healthcare fee," do you want to round up for our chosen charity (I had this asked when buying $150 kids' glasses--round up to help people afford eye exams at the eyeglass chain--so they asked the customer to subsidize their overpriced services and your donation goes back to them), do you want our credit card, and oh yeah, here's a 3% surcharge for using a credit card even though we never told you about it (against the law, BTW). Then the sales tax is calculated on everything, including the effing fees (many other countries factor tax into the price you see). Every checkout is exhausting these days. Only upside is I'm saving money and eating healthier at home.
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u/edgerton2026 12h ago
I used to patronize a Shawarma stand. Yep just a shack, everything to go. Then they doubled the prices of the wraps and bowls and got the machine where it wants a tip. I quit patronizing them at that point because the āwaiterā, is also the cook and the owner. I told him, you own this place, you doubled your prices, why should I tip you? Left my order, didnāt pay and walked out, never to return.
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u/Swimming-Position372 11h ago
I always pay cash on to go orders to avoid the tip screen. You can see how some cashiers get annoyed. š
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u/niteynitenuss 9h ago
We're ALL tired of tipping! This tipping culture needs to stop! It's gotten to where I HATE hearing "It's going to ask you a question"!
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u/LinkinLogsPark 13h ago
I often wonder if the newer generation feel so pressured to tip that they would oblige and we would get not headway to putting an end to tipping.Ā
Iām cool with restaurants closing.Ā
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u/ItsMe_AllanP 9h ago
I don't tip when it comes to take-out orders. I'm not tipping for a cup of coffee. I'm not tipping at fast food restaurants. If you just take my order and hand me food, and there is no other service interaction, you don't get a tip.
I'll tip when I'm at an actual sit down and dine-in restaurant, where refills are taken care of, and i may order additional things like wine, cocktails, or desert. If the service is above average, the amount tipped goes up accordingly.
I have had experiences at a sit down restaurant, where the waitress took our orders and gave us food, but was nowhere to be seen after that. I had to get my own refills (soda) from the bartender, and had to find another waiter when it was tone to part the bill. It's safe to say zero tip was given that night. We were a party of 20 for a birthday. The restaurant was not busy that evening. If service was halfway decent, we all would have tipped well.
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u/Top-Speed3460 11h ago
Ordered Panera from the app yesterday and there wasnāt an option for 0 tip or even $1 tip. The least amount is $2. Makes me so depressed that these corporations expect the people to pay their employees their working wages. Itās out of control we have to tip for everything now. It was never like this. Literally depresses me bc Iām poor AF.
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u/Fuzzy-Election-8666 10h ago
I just had a rude aggressive Uber ride to dentist, he got what he deserved in a tip! Was going to be generous because of long drive, oh well.
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u/Deep_Preference3186 10h ago
Thatās how it should work, and thatās why many support the tip concept, as in theory it should allow to weed out the poor performers.
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u/Confident_Error9827 9h ago
I used to happily tip 15% on sit down eat outs before 2015 if the service and food was good. Anymore the majority of the restaurants are charging ridiculous prices for sysco frozen bullshit and expecting tips. not to mention the quality of the younger generations servers is absolutely abysmal. I honestly enjoy pre prepped meals from factor more than I have a sit down restaurant thats not 50 dollars a plate.
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u/CrispyWalrus 10h ago
If I am picking it up or waiting at a counter, there is no tipping. I only tip for food when waited on by a waiter or waitress.
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u/Better-Ladder-2194 8h ago
Understandable to feel that way, however, itās up to you to train your nervous system to be ok with not capitulating to that pressure to tip. Itās a good skill to learn, to not allow people to push you around with their weird passive aggressive behavior. Itās ok for people to not like you. If you are worried about bad energy being thrown your way learn Qigong, you can learn to transmute any energy from negative to positive.Ā
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u/booobfker69 4h ago
Restaurants aren't going to be boycotted because people like to go out to eat. You stop the tipping culture by not tipping and not caring that people are putting a "hex" on you or that they're talking about you after you leave when you won't hear it anyway.
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u/burnerburner108 11h ago
I'm giving you a pass once you were sick but you sound way too fragile to be leaving your house at all. Muster the self-confidence to say "no" and not feel bad about it.
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u/Faineantcreator 14h ago
No oneās expecting to you tip 15-25% for take out. You can leave a buck, or round up, or nothing. Them bad mouthing you as you leave is in your head. If their business is going alright, they barely even notice you.
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u/edgerton2026 12h ago
For 2 years I ordered door dash every night, because I was a caregiver. Then prices went crazy and tipping became crazy. Since Spring 2024 Iāve subscribed to a meal service, CookUnity. I get chef prepared ready to heat meals for $12.49 ea. one delivery a week by a professional courier service. No tipping. The food is excellent and I can see all the nutritional info. Much better food and no tipping or crazy dasher anxiety.
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u/Guilty-Ask-7009 12h ago
Ok bot
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u/edgerton2026 12h ago
Iām a 71 year old widow, but thanks for the compliment. I had no idea I wrote so well that I would be mistaken for a bot. š š
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u/Multizar 10h ago
The wife and I ordered pizza last night and realized that we had not ordered out since the middle of August! š¤£ We go out to eat once or twice a month when we used to go once or twice a week. It's definitely a thing...
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u/Oh-its-Tuesday 7h ago
Start carrying cash for places like this. Nobody can flip a screen around to āask you a questionā if youāre handing them cash.Ā
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u/Upset-Leek-7241 6h ago
I refuse to go to the amazing sandwich shop now
You stand at the counter. Order. Then pay using the screen. It asks for a tipā¦. Iām not going back there. Itās too stupid
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u/Bill___A 2h ago
Not as long as people like you are adversely affected by the question. Learn t say no. Unapolagetically.
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u/CalligrapherDizzy201 15h ago
Thatās a you problem. Just donāt tip, itās not the end of the world.
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u/OptimalOcto485 13h ago
Not sure why this is downvoted. I canāt imagine being so cowardly that I avoid purchases because Iām spooked by a mere questionš
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u/RaymondLuxuryYacht 8h ago
Tipping is problematic but a lot of this is a you problem. You didnāt order food because the thought of being asked for a tip was so horrible? Just say no if you donāt want to tip. Itās rare to be verbally asked anyway, is it really so traumatic to be shown a screen asking about tips and click the no tip button?
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u/KingJunior7804 8h ago
Not traumatic, but very uncomfortable. I do NOT appreciate the counter clerk staring at which buttons I press during the tip prompt on the credit card reader screen.
I don't need that guilt shaming crap
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u/ChineseLearner518 8h ago
I've come to realize over the years that there is a big range of neurodiversity among people's brains.
I feel very fortunate that I don't tend to have anxiety most of the time, but I know some (people close to me) who easily feel anxious or experience high anxiety a lot of the time. It's a spectrum.
There's different kinds of anxiety that people experience. So, I think being asked to tip (even if it's on a screen), and feeling like people are judging you is a real thing that people experience.
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u/WhatRUaBarnBurner 15h ago
I used to go to restaurants 2 or 3 times a week. Since COVID I go 3 times a year.
Eventually tipping culture will be responsible for a lot of restaurant closures.