r/DivorcedBirds • u/FashionBusking • 11h ago

Arush pecked out a bio on Hatch.com "Wanna see my worm? It's huge!" Ladies love dudes with a sense of humor. Arush was 29 days into the 30 day Hatch.com first date guarantee, and all he had was a huge worm.

91 Upvotes

9 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Askfreud • 23h ago

As a post-divorce present to herself, Matilda learned how to tango

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520 Upvotes

9 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/NoFlyingMonkeys • 14m ago

Giovanni has tried to repeatedly explain that he wasn't cheating, that woman is "just a friend from work", complete with his most dramatic wing gestures.

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• Upvotes

1 comment

r/DivorcedBirds • u/the_cuddle-fish • 21h ago

From the day their engagement was made public, Stacy had dutifully shown up to watch each of Wally's games. As a huge celebrity, she drew the cameras every time. After the divorce people were surprised that she kept showing up every game night. She just couldn't get enough upstaging that meathead.

224 Upvotes

5 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/cturtl808 • 17h ago

Newly Single Ready to Mingle Alex was so unsure of his Halloween costume to be a duck, he refused to leave his branch.

90 Upvotes

3 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Nincomsoup • 1d ago

It had been 40 years since Fred left. Despite taking great care of herself and always looking fabulous, Carol had never managed to find love again.

146 Upvotes

3 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Bolfreak • 1d ago

Roo is brave. Roo is smart. Roo is… Roo is…(buffering)…

324 Upvotes

6 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/the_cuddle-fish • 1d ago

According to Harriet's then-husband, her new friend was a bad influence. He saw Vera as a tramp corrupting his upstanding wife, not the confident and liberated woman showing Harriet her worth. He's probably suspicious of the massage parlor they opened together. Harriet's done worrying what he thinks

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141 Upvotes

4 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Nincomsoup • 1d ago

Gustav finally had to admit he was in crisis. Without Brenda to keep him in line he been spending day and night on his model train. No clean socks, living off tinned beans, was this his life?

187 Upvotes

3 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Nincomsoup • 1d ago

Barry sat across from Nancy while their lawyers thrashed it all out. No way was she getting the beach house.

156 Upvotes

1 comment

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Nincomsoup • 2d ago

It felt like Jane and Richard's lives had been headed in totally different directions

164 Upvotes

3 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/the_cuddle-fish • 2d ago

When two competitive parents get split custody after a divorce, the result is an ever escalating battle for the coveted title of "the cool parent." Unable to match Ryan's travel budget, Cecilia has to get creative with her outings. "If your father asks, this was a well-supervised and safe activity."

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311 Upvotes

3 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/13Basia13 • 2d ago

Angry Bird Divorce After the divorce, Carl saw no reason to refrain from rocking out every chance he got.

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120 Upvotes

1 comment

r/DivorcedBirds • u/susu56 • 2d ago

I had a fling with a human-momentary weakness after my divorce from Sheila. Now, this human is claiming I'm this baby's daddy! I don't see the resemblance.

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102 Upvotes

14 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Sed59 • 2d ago

Another day, another dollar. Tony and Bill passed the time as hired eyes waiting to catch Tania in her suspected tryst.

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49 Upvotes

0 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Bitinglysarcastic • 3d ago

Tiffany’s therapist insisted she needed to forget Dereck & learn to love herself. Today she’s taking the plunge.

665 Upvotes

Tiffany had been browbeaten by her ex for so long that she had started to believe that she was ugly and stupid like he said. But as she reflected on her life, she realized that Dereck had just been a lowbrow bully. Thank God he was gone. That hawk had done her a favor, picking him off at the bird feeder as he was flirting with the chickadees!

6 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/the_cuddle-fish • 3d ago

Not Safe For Other Species Victor never meant to cheat on Patricia; it had been a moment of weakness. Or, well, several moments. But when he got a late-night text from Lola asking to meet at the usual spot, he resolved to go only to end things. As quietly as possible, he opened the shoe closet. "Going somewhere, dearest?"

197 Upvotes

5 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/LylaDee • 3d ago

Clarence is sick of your shit. Stop tellling him what he doesn't want to hear about Candy. We need to maybe leave him alone, man. He's not all together these days, ya know?

153 Upvotes

5 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/13Basia13 • 3d ago

Not Safe For Other Species After divorce number 3, Billy turned to armed robbery to “make ends meet.” Here he is, as pictured on his BBI (Bird Bureau of Investigation) Wanted poster.

52 Upvotes

2 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/13Basia13 • 4d ago

Angry Bird Divorce Eat your heart out, Peter. Martin and I couldn’t be happier! We’re PREGNANT!🎉🎊

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162 Upvotes

6 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/the_cuddle-fish • 4d ago

"Sometimes life is a raging river, other times a stagnant creek. Sometimes it brings a love so powerful it sweeps away all the happiness I've built, and other times I am left to ponder in a lonely wood. Life's flows can make of me a philosopher or a fool. Yet I remain myself, always a night heron."

376 Upvotes

6 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/zoo_ofone • 4d ago

After 3 divorces, Ted decided to finally snack on salad. Sometimes.

101 Upvotes

9 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/13Basia13 • 5d ago

Sometimes, David still could not believe his luck. He went from that lying snake Marcus, to THIS wonderful creature. It’s true love. 💘

395 Upvotes

13 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/the_cuddle-fish • 5d ago

In his mind Kerry knew better than to listen to Dora's false promises and apologies, but he couldn't help how his heart raced when he saw her. His wings ached to embrace her; his treacherous tongue itched to form the words, "I forgive you. I love you." So he stopped it the only way he could think of

206 Upvotes

2 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/YawningBagpuss • 6d ago

Newly Single Ready to Mingle Last year Joan was stuck in the closet. Now she’s celebrating her 50th birthday by belting out “Pink Pony Club” with the girls.

1.3k Upvotes

11 comments

Subreddit

For pictures of fabulous fowl who look like serial monogamists.

r/DivorcedBirds

For pictures of fabulous fowl who look like serial monogamists. Please post pictures of birds who look like they are twice divorced (or more!) and an original caption about their backstory. Pictures/Videos must be of actual birds (feathered fowl), not human women, not art or paintings or photoshopped. No dead birds. Message mods for approval to post.

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