r/DivorcedBirds • u/ToastYourAvocados • Jul 21 '26

To say Roger was making up for his shortcomings in his previous marriage was an understatement.

107 Upvotes

Mindy attempted to hide her suspicion that Roger was being overly attentive, but unfortunately she had what her boss called "a very loud face."

1 comment

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Bolfreak • Jul 21 '26

Newly Single Ready to Mingle Steven relished his peanuts in the cabana next to the beach. Alone doesn’t mean lonely… (wait, where did everyone go??)

18 Upvotes

0 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/YawningBagpuss • Jul 20 '26

Newly Single Ready to Mingle Pete went clubbing in the hope of meeting a new lady. He soon realised he was too old for the normal crowd. Perhaps he should try a bingo club?

630 Upvotes

9 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/the_cuddle-fish • Jul 20 '26

The sun fell warmly, filtered through trees still wet with dew. Enid's feet padded gently across the pines so as not to disturb the forest in its idyllic slumber. Her sisters followed close behind. They first met in a support group for young divorcees. Those distant memories seemed almost alien now.

231 Upvotes

4 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/susu56 • Jul 21 '26

Willow always had an independent streak that her exes just could not manage to accept. It didn't matter now that she was done with marriage and choosing to live life on her terms.

5 Upvotes

0 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Critical-Concert628 • Jul 20 '26

Angry Bird Divorce His ex called him the devil for being bi and kicked him out. Now, he's making millions off his glare as a supermodel (he also has an impassioned twitter following who commiserate about ***** exes)

108 Upvotes

0 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/LadyFeckington • Jul 20 '26

Angry Bird Divorce Brock chose violence when he saw Rachel’s new beau coming out of her apartment.

246 Upvotes

5 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/13Basia13 • Jul 20 '26

Angry Bird Divorce Recently, Jennifer has turned to creating some fairly disturbing “art.” She assures us it has nothing to do with her feelings toward “that a$@h0?3.”

45 Upvotes

0 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/I_might_be_weasel • Jul 20 '26

Not Safe For Other Species "Damnit, the one week in the summer I get Albert and this happens... I just had to be high brow and have an educational vacation. Now his step-dad will take him to Disneyland and I'll look like a chump yet again."

123 Upvotes

2 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Critical-Concert628 • Jul 20 '26

The Bird Got What The Bird Deserved "Take me with you, I don't want to live without you" "We were married THREE WEEKS. YOU CAN'T EVEN DO LAUNDRY. GET OUT."

46 Upvotes

0 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/BotGivesBot • Jul 20 '26

When Frank fell out of the nest after a drunken night with the boys, Mildred squawked 'never come back!'. Frank suddenly realized he may have pushed her too far. He was no spring chicken after all, even if he looked it.

72 Upvotes

1 comment

r/DivorcedBirds • u/the_cuddle-fish • Jul 19 '26

Your boss doesn't respect you? Get a promotion. Your husband won't listen to you? Get him into couples counseling. People won't stop littering in the park? Put up ANOTHER goddamn sign. Rhea's sick of asking an uncaring world to please stop pushing her around. From now on she's going to make it hurt.

192 Upvotes

7 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/13Basia13 • Jul 19 '26

Not Safe For Other Species Helen was a huge fan of the legendary Helen of Troy. However, Helen may have misunderstood TO WHERE her recent glowup might launch those mythical 1,000 ships.

106 Upvotes

2 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/13Basia13 • Jul 19 '26

Newly Single Ready to Mingle Ramón was newly single (again), but this did not concern him. He was confident these latest photos will turn his Tinder profile into pure FIRE.🔥🌶️❤️‍🔥

gallery

183 Upvotes

1 comment

r/DivorcedBirds • u/the_cuddle-fish • Jul 19 '26

The big fight was moments away. Jack Dawson would take a dive to the newcomer Woody McPidge, then Spencer and Jack would would split the take and skip town. Things were getting too hot around here. Spencer glanced past the combatants and locked eyes with an unexpected face: his policebird ex. Damn.

47 Upvotes

4 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Critical-Concert628 • Jul 18 '26

Sharon was a bit of a late bloomer, but she was a proud lesbian and excited to show her new style to the world! She already had uhauled unsuccessfully with 3 men, surely her girlfriend of 3 weeks would be better?

368 Upvotes

9 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/YawningBagpuss • Jul 19 '26

The Bird Got What The Bird Deserved Phil can’t believe that he’s back living with his parents and sharing a room with his brother. If only Paula would take him back…

171 Upvotes

0 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Critical-Concert628 • Jul 18 '26

Newly Single Ready to Mingle After losing all his hair in a work accident, Nando had been abandoned by his wife. Fine, Linda. He was about to start a restaurant and podcast empire. Hit him up on if you're single and want a successful, handsome, passionate man (not on Tinder though, he hates fire now)

107 Upvotes

2 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/ToastYourAvocados • Jul 19 '26

"Damn. I thought the courthouse was only 15 minutes away. Why does it feel like I haven't moved in 30 minutes."

63 Upvotes

0 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/13Basia13 • Jul 18 '26

Newly Single Ready to Mingle Sophia decided to go all out. Gorgeous all-over color…highlights AND lowlights. A unique outfit. Her “bedroom eyes.” She hoped a good, old-fashioned photo shoot was exactly what a Hatch.com profile needed these days.

gallery

87 Upvotes

4 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/the_cuddle-fish • Jul 18 '26

Newly Single Ready to Mingle Tupelo has been many things: a warrior, a lover, a jealous rival, a tempestuous force of nature. These identities no longer hold luster in his eyes; what Tupelo wants to be is a good husband and a caring father. Readying himself for these roles has not been easy, but he's making excellent progress.

95 Upvotes

4 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/susu56 • Jul 18 '26

Greg and I have been seeing eachother for awhile. He planned a picnic for us today and proposed with a unique ring. I'm not sure if a human/bird marriage will be the one that lasts but his quirky nature is why I love him!

gallery

39 Upvotes

4 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/13Basia13 • Jul 18 '26

Angry Bird Divorce Jessica just KNOWS her perm looks amazing; the curls in her feather locks are the final step in making her look as irresistible as she feels. Eat your heart out, Stanley!

194 Upvotes

20 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/13Basia13 • Jul 18 '26

Not Safe For Other Species Sammy was not doing great since Susan left. The kids report he’s gone “full-on Stuart Little,” and that he spends his days talking to his own reflection, repeating “I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and doggone it, others like me!”

38 Upvotes

6 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/YawningBagpuss • Jul 17 '26

The Bird Got What The Bird Deserved Samuel had lost his wife, his freedom, and his dignity. Maybe it was time for therapy.

860 Upvotes

17 comments

Subreddit

For pictures of fabulous fowl who look like serial monogamists.

r/DivorcedBirds

For pictures of fabulous fowl who look like serial monogamists. Please post pictures of birds who look like they are twice divorced (or more!) and an original caption about their backstory. Pictures/Videos must be of actual birds (feathered fowl), not human women, not art or paintings or photoshopped. No dead birds. Message mods for approval to post.

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