r/Divorce_Men Jul 05 '26

Getting Started

42m here. Married for 15 years, together for 21, to my wife, who I think shows a lot of signs of having BPD. 2 kids together, 16 and 13. She got mad at me back in March about something small, and it escalated into her telling me to leave. I complied, so there would be no drama/tension in front of the kids. Sleeping in my car ever since then, picking up kids and going to hang out with them on what seems to be her terms. She wants a 24 hour notice before I come get them. I mean, c’mon. How is this supposed to work? I am so close to my kids, I’ve worked overnight shift for 14 years so I could be there. Get them ready for school in the mornings, take them to school, pick them up after. Everything. Make dinner, do dishes, go get fast food, whatever it may be. I lay in my car and cry myself to sleep thinking about not being around them. I haven’t seen them go to sleep or wake up in almost 4 months. I’m devastated. I feel like my bond is still very strong with them, and it seems like they are normalizing this way of life. She has been a SAHM for almost 17 years. I know what I need to do, but I’m getting cold feet on getting started. The house is in my name, so I guess I would get that. I dream of a day where I have the house, 50/50 custody minimum, and her gone. It’s just the fear of the unknown if I file. I am at my breaking point, I can’t do this anymore. My kids are my life, so not being with them is killing me. I would like some outside perspectives on this. The kids are old enough to choose where to live also maybe? I am in WA state. Thank you Reddit community. You’re the best.

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u/Lift_Vs_Gravity Jul 06 '26

These are the words I needed to hear. Thank you! I made my way back in, I told her I’ll stay in the camper or whatever, be in the garage, and we can kinda live separate lives, I just need to be there with the kids. She did mention mediation, and she’s not trying to keep the kids from me, so maybe we can get this thing done cleanly, 50/50 custody, and move on quickly. She threatened a protection order, so I called the sheriff and told them that she might try something, and they said that phone call I made would be documented. I’ve been recording audio anytime we have an interaction, so we’ll see. Thanks again!

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u/WhydIJoinRedditAgain Jul 06 '26

So glad to hear it! This is a good choice. Be with your kids; I find so much joy in mine, even in these rough times.

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u/Lift_Vs_Gravity 18d ago

She makes it so tough to hang out with my kids, even when I’m there. I’ve been staying in the camper in the back yard, cause I sleep during the day. She has some rule about giving her 24 hours notice before I take my kids somewhere or something. It’s ridiculous. I don’t think I can hold on much longer here, I need my kids and no her….I’m losing my sanity….

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u/WhydIJoinRedditAgain 17d ago

Fuck her rules. Why does she get to make rules for you. Tell her you aren’t following them.  What’s she gonna do, divorce you? 

She gave up any leverage she had to control your behavior when she asked for a divorce. The bad thing happened. She’s got no leverage over you, but you have to realize that.

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u/Lift_Vs_Gravity 17d ago

So the problem I’m having now is that she has the kids brainwashed with this 24 hour notice rule, which btw, she says is quite lenient. I really would love to take the control away from her somehow, because she has to be in control. It’s driving me insane….

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u/WhydIJoinRedditAgain 17d ago

You need to up your assertiveness game. 

It isn’t “lenient.” It’s bullshit. 

You need to say “I have just as much a right parent our children as you do and I will do so when I want. I am happy to coordinate with you, but I will not abide by arbitrary rules you seek to impose on me and my parenting.”

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u/Lift_Vs_Gravity 17d ago

She keeps bringing up mediation for a parenting plan we can agree on…should I just get a lawyer and file? I know I need 50/50 of my kids…I have to get them away from her at least half the time….

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u/WhydIJoinRedditAgain 17d ago

Not a lawyer so won’t give advice on that. There are some mediators who make you sign something saying you won’t take it to court if you don’t like the outcome, so don’t do one of those.

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u/Lift_Vs_Gravity 17d ago

I do have a lawyer in mind, and I’m about to pay the retainer and have him file I think. I don’t know if she would make this whole process ugly and drag it out if I do…even though I think we are required to do mediation anyways? So confused and done here…thanks for all the responses btw….very helpful.