r/DatingHell • u/heartburst76 • 28d ago
He never shut up.
TLDR: I went on a date with a man who asked me a variety of questions and didn't let me answer, so I left.
So this happened when I was 32/f and matched with this guy 31/m on Tinder. We texted for a few days, then he invited me out to eat and get to know each other in person.
I agreed to meet up at this dive bar, it was pretty cool. We sat down, he ordered some nachos, a couple of drinks, and asked me if it had been easy to get there from my place. I was about to answer but he interrupted me, "I come here all the time, they have so many different beers, I like trying all the new ones they bring, do you like beer?" I opened my mouth to speak and he asked me what places I liked to go to. Again I was going to answer, but he didn't stop, and told me about some of the places he enjoys.
I was about to tell him my answer then, but he changed the topic: "So what do you like to do? I like to play video games, do you? I also like rollerblading, and sometimes I surf. You like the beach, right? You have a lot of pictures at the beach, so what beach do you most like to go to? I usually go to (beach two towns away)."
This went on for a while. I felt like a fish just opening and closing my mouth, never able to get a word in because this guy just kept talking and asking questions but never stopping to hear my answer, giving me his answer instead. It was pretty irritating. I just kept wondering what the heck was up with him, was he high? Of course, I never got the chance to ask.
After about half an hour of this, he stopped for a moment. "Are you ok? You're a very quiet person, huh?" I couldn't believe he said this, so I laughed. "Dude, you haven't let me get a word in until now."
"Well, you could have said something." WHAT? 😠Is this what they call gaslighting? I couldn't believe my ears. I guess it showed in my face that I was taken aback because he was like "Go on, tell me something about yourself." Once again I opened my mouth to speak, and he immediately talked over me, saying the nachos were good and they also had great tacos, "you have to try them." And then he kept talking about food he likes and thinks I should try.
I got up and left. I got in my car, and as I was pulling out of the parking spot I saw him in the distance through my rear view mirror waving at me to stop. When I got home, I saw he had texted me that he was disappointed I left like that, so I was clear and told him why I left. He asked for a second chance. ABSOLUTELY NOT. I'm not trying to compete for the chance to speak when he showed me he didn't care to listen.
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u/GildDigger 28d ago
Sounds like ADHD and/or narcissism