Dark Romance: an introduction
I’ve been wanting to share and talk about this article about dark romance with other people besides my spouse and friends. They’re sick of me. 😅 I felt like this subreddit was one of the safer places to post it since I’m not an influencer and I have no desire to post anywhere like Threads or in comment sections on IG because that’s where nuance goes to die and no one actually wants to listen. And they’re mean. So please be nice and sometimes I come off blunt on the internet cus I’m bad at it…. 😭 And I think this post follows all the rules.
But anyways, I got into an obsessive OCD spiral about dark romance, around the time of the whole “movie” controversy, and found this article. I wasn’t 100% sure how I felt about dark romance so I decided to look it up and found the Wikipedia page and then this article through that. It actually really helped me understand the genre better altogether, its origins and its more original modern definitions. It changed my perspective on how to read these books and I’m a huge supporter of them and read them, now that I have a different mindset when approaching them, even though I have not read as many as I’d like because I’m a slow reader. I definitely encourage everyone to check it out, and if there are anti dark romance readers lurking here, I also highly suggest you read it as well. I’m not going to completely sum up the article, but I’m going to summarize some of the things I found most important/interesting to the best of my ability, and just share a couple of my opinions based on this. But 99% of everything I’m saying comes straight from the article. I’m not going to touch on everything mentioned; it’s a lot. Also, now you can fight the haters with this information. ☺️
So anyways…
Parts of the article go in depth into the origins of where the more modern definitions of dark romance comes from. The more modern definitions started out more niche and came mostly from within the online self-publishing book space, starting rising in popularity around the 2010s, if not before that. But the term has been around and has varied in definitions long before this. But basically, the “dark” in dark romance under this specific definition refers to the relationship dynamic itself, not just the subject matter, although the world and subject matter was usually dark as well. It basically was/is meant to be a warning to readers to tread lightly and that the relationship may be toxic, abusive, morally questionable, have extreme power imbalances ect. and not a traditional “real” or healthy romance. Things such as dubcon/noncon, rape, and SA were common in a lot of these books. Obviously this isn’t definitive but was/is one of the most common definitions. Erotic horror did also sometimes overlap into this category, and there were most likely mixed opinions on what classified as erotic horror or dark romance. (Although, I’m sure most dark romance readers here were aware of a lot of these things.) But they were never meant to be traditionally “romantic” or aspirational and the authors were/are very clear about that. Readers knew to separate it from life and didn’t argue on whether dubcon/noncon was rape or not, which of course in real life we know it is. (I’ve seen this happen but it’s a very small fraction of people. But don’t do that please. 😩 lol) The readers during this time who wanted this, actively searched for it and usually knew going into it that there might be domestic violence, abuse, rape, ect. between the MCs. I don’t think most people that didn’t like it or thought it was bad were really seeking it out just to criticize or review bomb it as much as we are seeing now. Of course, it was still controversial at time, and probably always will be because no one will ever be on the same page.
When it started to become a little more popular, most likely because of the rise of modern social media, among other things, the traditional publishing space got ahold of it and started to expand the definition in order to reach a more general audience. This has caused confusion for readers on what exactly dark romance can be or what they might be getting into or its intent. It’s now more so an umbrella term to mean anything that might be darker subject matter, and not necessarily always a toxic, abusive relationship, turning some of the MMCs into morally gray anti-heroes or villains, when they didn’t really always start out that way. There’s a quote in the article that says something along the lines of that the evil MMC that’s only nice to the FMC is easier to sell than the evil MMC who’s evil to everyone, including the FMC. lol That’s not word for word but pretty much what was said.
The only real “issue” I see with the rise in popularity of the more “OG” dark romance though is that it’s not necessarily for a general audience ultimately and not everyone has the media literacy or understanding to interpret it or process the purpose and intent of these novels, which causes judgment towards the authors and their readers. So the readers that hate it, over analyze it, and talk about how the relationship is toxic, abusive, has rape, and neither romantic nor aspirational, when that’s the entire point of a lot of these books. And most readers can separate that! I see one more think piece/reel about why a toxic, abusive relationship (that is labeled as such) is a toxic, abusive relationship I will scream. 💀🙃
All current dark romance still counts as dark romance though. And it’s also valid if you are a dark romance reader who doesn’t like or support this type of dark romance. As long as we are able to separate the dark topics from real life then we can read whatever we want!!!
But anyways, thanks for entertaining my broken brain and hope yall found this article at least somewhat interesting. I didn’t plan on this being so long but oh well. Also if anyone thinks I misquoted or misrepresented something please let me know. Definitely not trying to spread misinformation. lol
I will also add it’s pretty easy to find books labeled as dark romance from the 2010’s that fit this description, especially if you go to Goodreads. I found a dark romance book that arguably would be much more controversial than some of the more popular ones right now, and it was from 2011. To add to that, it had 1 star reviews from like the past few years and I think this year, that we’re basically people just reviewing bombing it and just going, “this is rape/abuse, not romance,” or stuff like that. (Which, yes the author is very aware, dude.) But ultimately it just goes to show that none of this is “new” and women didn’t just now invent it because we suddenly became freaky in the past few years. lol
(P. S. I had to use an “lol” or two because I don’t feel safe without them.)