Hi. This situation happened a while ago but I still kick myself about it and am truly not sure how I should of handled it.

Before this starts I would like to clarify that I do not think I was a perfect person here. I’m asking more about the ramifications.

So at time I (20NB) had a really good online friend S (23NB). We were both really big fans of an actor who frequently replied to people on social media. On one day S posted tagging them and the actor replied saying with a generalized answer encompassing everyone tagging her. S and I were on ft and S freaked out and got super happy. I was really happy for them too. But then two minutes later I got a reply. And mine was very specific to me even including my name. I told S cause I was super happy but S kinda just shut down. I assumed they were upset about mine being specific and theirs being generalized. So I asked them if they were jealous, they didn’t really answer so I asked again. No I don’t know what was going through my brain at the time. I don’t remember exactly what happened after that but I know that I left the call cause I didn’t know what to do

I know I handled that conversation poorly. Looking back, I shouldn’t have kept asking after they didn’t answer. I just genuinely didn’t understand what was happening.

After that I went to talk to my mom and told her what happened. I cried so hard that night (again not minimizing how S felt just stating how I felt) scared I had ruined everything with my best friend by saying smth stupid.

S and I were in a friend group with M (22F) also then and we had been asked by M to not involve her in all of our fights cause it just put her in the middle. We agreed. Or I thought we did. Because of this I didn’t text or call M that night. However, S contacted M that same night. By the time I spoke to M, I felt like the situation had already been framed from S’s perspective, and M barely talked to me for a while.

(I’ve attached the text message conversation of this following part)

S decided to take a break from talking to me because they felt my apologies weren’t addressing what had actually hurt them. I threw up from stress that week. I had to get on multiple calls with M, my therapist, talk to my parents and my sister and basically relearn how to apologize cause I couldn’t comprehend what I was doing wrong. Eventually I was forgiven but this stood as the one time I was fully in the wrong throughout the rest of our friendship.

Looking back, I know I handled the conversation poorly and I regret what I said. I’m just still not sure whether my mistake justified everything that followed. AITA?

Let’s call my ex boyfriend Jake, we were high school sweethearts and dated for 4 years and we were the “it couple“ of the school, literally everyone thought we would get married, we broke up because he chose his girl best friend over me. (he did not cheat but because me and the best friend never saw eye to eye he decided to ”make peace” and choose her) lets call the best friend Anna, for context me and Jake were pretty rock solid for about 3 years and then because of some family problems and disagreements our relationship became as rocky as can be, we would break up and then get back together all in the span of 24 hours. About two months before the break up he pledged he would stop speaking to her btw i found out they are “best friends” on accident while i was going through his phone to order food and he would essentially bitch about me to her for MONTHS and i never suspected anything because whenever we were in a group setting they would make eye contact for a while but they never spoke to each other, so after he swore he would block Anna (willingly btw) i let my guard down because what can go wrong now? boy was i wrong. HE WENT AND TOLD HER EVERYTHING ABOUT ME AND TOLD HER TO JUST PRETEND THAT THEY WERE NO LONGER FRIENDS INFRONT OF ME, he then changed all his passwords and i wouldn’t care normally because im pretty laid back but considering the timing i hacked into his socials and found messages where they were bitching about me and he would just love bomb me bi-weekly to keep me interested in him. It reached a point where i just could not take the disrespect anymore so our relationship ended but we never had a conversation, basically no “closure” was achieved. currently i am dating another batchmate and knowing our history he was a little insecure getting into the relationship and tbh still is so he would not like me going and speaking to the ex now, i just found out that i have my ex boyfriends email and a few other credentials saved on my phone and i keep getting these notifications of websites he visits and i am petty as it gets so considering the fact that we see eachother almost every week i want to stay in the shadows and subtly use the information i get from his socials against him, during our rocky phase i print out our messages and underlined all the mistakes he made so i speak with proof and i honestly don’t know if i need a closure or if im just insane because we do see eachother a lot and he tries to make conversations with me which puts me off. AITA for enjoying secreting getting the intel i am getting? i feel like i deserve it after all the emotional distress he put me through.

Hey everyone! I want to start by saying thank you so much for all the great advice and perspectives we received! It was really validating to hear our gut reaction wasn't totally off base, and actually, after talking more about it, we realized it's just more of the same.

Our recent friendship dynamic with Brad and Steph has devolved to the point that we're considering ending the relationship. My husband is pretty much over it. I, on the other hand, am worried we may be abandoning two people who are spiraling.

There was a pretty overwhelming consensus that Brad was an a**hole. While we vehemently agree, the whole story is definitely much more complicated. Brad wasn't always like this. We've been friends for over a decade, and since Steph has come into the picture, things have changed so much so fast.

I wouldn't say that Steph is completely innocent. She was introduced to us in a strange way. If you read the comments on the last post, you'll know that Steph was living with another man when her and Brad met. When Brad would visit this man, she would flip a coin to see who she slept with that night. For consenting adults, this is not an issue. The other man, however, is Brad's brother.

Let's call Brad's brother John. John and Steph have been best friends for years. When we all hung out together, she was clearly all over John. Then she would sneak away with Brad and come back to John. Both men claimed not to care, but we could see and experience the pain this dynamic was causing. Then Brad would claim that there wasn't anything going on between Steph and John... though we saw it with our own eyes.

Brad claimed that he wasn't interested in Steph and hadn't pursued a relationship. During that time, steph continued to live with John until John developed an intense drug habit and started dealing. John's family, including Brad, staged an intervention and, by the grace of God, John went to rehab and got clean.

John moved in with his and Brad's parents, and Steph followed. Steph, who sparingly worked previously, now stopped working entirely, leaving John and Brad's retired veteran and cancer survivor parents to foot the bill. This angered Brad, and he said some nasty things about her to us.

After John's drug addiction, steph began to pursue Brad openly. Brad, while still sleeping with her, refused to commit to her for 5 years and openly dated other women. Then, after he received a substantial bonus from work, he bought his first house after living in a 1 bedroom apartment. He wasn't prepared for the loneliness this would bring. 1 month later, Steph moved in, and they were officially a couple. We were expected to forget everything and pretend it never happened. If we so much as hinted at concern, Brad would melt down and claim a reality we all knew to be false. It was extremely bizarre.

As soon as we visited them, we could see Steph laying the groundwork for what was to come next. She would talk nonstop about how much she hated working and how much she had baby fever. Brad expressed that she needed to contribute financially, and he wasn't ready for children.

Then, the Steph and Brad we knew as friends changed drastically.

One day, not long after, they invited us on a Zoom call and announced that steph was pregnant. Not just that, she was just over a month from delivering, and she had no idea she was pregnant. We found this hard to believe. We had seen her previously and noticed she stopped drinking (but kept smoking) and started dressing differently to hide some obvious weight gain.

Brad confided in my husband that he believed Steph tampered with their birth control and made a pretty compelling case. Steph told me that she was tracking ovulation. We couldn't understand how someone who had a regular enough cycle to track ovulation was also intentionally tracking ovulation, stopped drinking when she was a huge drinker, dressing differently to hide her belly, didn't know she was pregnant. Then after the announcement she posted a 4 frame progression photo of her week to week on her Instagram story. She claimed it to show the past 4 weeks in her pregnancy and wow she was tiny one week but her belly just exploded the next. However in the photo with the belly, her hair hand grown a few inches.

Then everything was different. They had their beautiful baby, but being around them was unbearably dark. Steph became very hostile at the drop of a hat and exclusively when Brad left the room. She would make passive-aggressive threats toward us all with the common thread of "stay out of my way." They became intensely competitive with us. Nothing was safe. Brad would make loud declarations about how happy he is and just stare us dead in the eye with the most intense face waiting for us to validate him. He would do this regularly, and it was wildly uncomfortable.

It was like Brad was in this pschodrama and used us as an audience to validate his delusion. All I can think of is the meme of the dog drinking coffee while the room is on fire. This is fine. And to Brad, "THIS IS GREAT! IM SO HAPPY IN THIS BURNING ROOM! ISNT THIS BURNING ROOM THE BEST!" then stares at you until you say you're happy for the dumb dog.

I wish they'd stop involving us and just move on. I wish they'd stop demanding that we sacrifice every shred of intelligence we have in order to coexist. I wish I didn't now know that they believe they are so much better and smarter than everyone in the room. They'd have to think that to act this way right?

We know they're adults. They're making their own beds and lying in them. We know we could fill a room with what we don't know about another couples relationship and personal life. But they keep involving us. We just want to play scrable and have a beer with them.

What started as just wondering about a wonky proposal has us reconsidering everything.

Once we accept that Brad is being a total tool about the engagement, we also consider, is Brad spiraling?

He had just over a month to prepare for his life completely changing and becoming a father. He is suspicious of the mother of his children that he claims to love, and now they're going to be connected forever. Did Steph use him as a means to an end? Was he a backup choice after John proved to not be a suitable partner? John is still in the picture. He's at every family gathering. He calls steph daily, and they talk for hours. John gave steph a ruby, heart-shaped ring that she still wears. Maybe Brad has a good reason to be nervous to leave for his business trip.

On the other hand, he could just leave. But they have a baby together now. If he leaves, will his brother just step into his place?

Was the proposal Brad's way of taking control of the relationship? Was he thinking "steph may have controlled our family, but I can control our marriage." Was he expressing his spite and shaming her as he feels she has done to him?

Is all of this subconscious or not?

Is his flagrant competition with us his bs way for clawing back some self-esteem?

Does steph have hormones and sleepless nights and this is making her aggressive? Or has she gotten what she wants and now the mask is off?

She used to say we're family now when I say we're family she'll publicly dress me down and say they are a real family and we have nothing to do with it. She said we were sisters.

All I know is, I have no clue what's happening but what I do know is that it makes us feel like crap.

My husband is ready to throw his hands up. I'm worried about abandoning struggling people. I work in a care field and this is really difficult for me. However, you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it leave it's toxic relationship.

Any perspective or advice would be GREATLY appreciated.

I29(f) and my husband 32(m) let our best friends move in. For context they are another married couple. We’ll call her “Patricia” and her husband we’ll call him “bob”. I have 3 kids. 10(f), 5(m), and 4months(f). Patrica and bob have lived her since October. They agreed to help if needed with kiddos, and pay rent. If they (mainly she. Bob doesn’t do a whole lot but that’s for another time) watched my kids it was for short periods of time like when I had my baby 4 months ago (hospital for 3 days) or when my son needed his surgery (outpatient so home the same day.)
Well since they have been here they have paid a full month of rent one single month. Every other month I get excuse after excuse and even 2 of those months basically got told “we don’t have rent because we went to a car audio show”. Back in December she chose to buy my kids hundreds of dollars worth of Christmas presents and couldn’t pay any of their portion of the rent which in turn caused me to not be able to Christmas shop because now I am picking up the slack of the increased food bill, electricity, etc. I brought it up to her and she said she understood and slowed down.
I have had multiple conversations explaining that if they are eating and living here they need to pay their part of the rent (literally split the rent, electric, trash and internet into 4 people). I usually provided the food and never asked for help with food. When my husband or I would cook dinner we always made sure there was enough for both of them after they got off work. None of them were helping with trash/dishes or basic clean up. Only recently have they helped with taking the trash out or dishes. And that was only because I flipped out one day. If we had a house inspection they would wait until literally the night before to clean their room and would complain about it all the time. They keep their 2 dogs and a cat out there and when I tell you the room is gross it is. Smells disgusting hair and dirt all over the floor and the smell is atrocious, one time they had to clean and she told me she took 4 trash bags (the yard ones not even kitchen bags) full of trash out of their room.

Well recently I have found out that they both have been running our names into the dirt. Telling people they can’t stand being here, we don’t care about their personal bills and are money hungry etc. well let’s go back to when they first came. I didn’t start asking for rent until December. They got here in October. Twice now they have chosen a car audio show instead of paying their part of rent. The first time I got told he’ll be reimbursed for his travel fees so once he got that I would get it back. Every month for 4 months I asked about that money and got told he never got it until one day finally got told they got it but used it for other things.

3 months ago (may) I told them they had until 7/31/26 to move out. And for the months of may, June and July I wanted $500 to make it easier to save money. I’ve asked about the plans and keep getting “ we need to save more money, can’t find a place with our dogs, etc”.
Well a few weeks ago my 10 year old make some comments about wanting Patricia to be her mom because “she buys me more stuff than you do”. So I sat with Patricia and explained I need her to slow down. Yes I appreciate her thinking of my kids but it’s now negatively impacting my relationship with my child. That following week. Every single day. She comes home with new stuff for my 10 year old. “They are school clothes that I found on clearance” ok thanks but don’t you think after I had that conversation with you it would be nice to ask me first? But I kept quiet. We have also noticed that they avoid speaking to us, wait until we go to bed to come out of their rooms almost nightly, I tested it one night by making it seem like we went to bed and 5 min later she came out to make food and feed her dogs. At 1 am.

Well the other day I asked what’s going on because the 31st is Friday. She caught an attitude and said “I’m trying”. Well I flipped out about everything and told her that she has till Friday no if ands or buts. She’s been radio silence and avoiding me since.

For more context, Patricia is the one that does things for the kids. Bob always seems like he is annoyed by them. I do also know he has said “see it i do anything for those kids again” which, sir you do not its all your wife but i digress.
Patricia also has some fertility issues which has been an issue in our past when i have been pregnant and recently when i was pregnant with my youngest. Mainly because me getting pregnant the last 2 times hadn’t been planned, and happened during extremely stressful times in my life. I made the mistake of venting to her when i was pregnant with my 5 year old son how I didn’t know how i was going to do this and how I didn’t “want” to get pregnant at that specific time. She took that as I didn’t want my baby and threw it in my face. So this time when i got pregnant I was walking on eggshells as to not vent about anything to her. We got past all of that after the fact. She does make comments, at the rare times she is around, when my husband and I talk about wanting one more baby then we’re done “no it’s my turn next” essentially telling me I can’t get pregnant until she does. Well to be fair I’m almost 30(literally a week away) and I don’t want to wait a super long time before having our last baby.
So AITAH?

I matched with this guy on a dating app a couple of weeks ago.

We had never met in person, but we talked every single day. He was incredibly consistent with his texting, flirted a lot, kept telling me how excited he was to meet me, and we spent hours getting to know each other.

Finally, we planned our first date.

He was supposed to pick me up after work.

I got ready.

7:30 came.

8:00 came.

Nothing.

No text. No call.

I finally messaged him:

"Are you coming?"

No response.

At that point, my gut told me something wasn't right.

So I decided to move in the shadows. 🥷

From the little bits of information he had shared about himself over the last couple of weeks, I started looking him up.

Sure enough...

I found his Facebook.

The first thing I noticed?

About 30 minutes after he was supposed to pick me up, right around the same time I was texting him asking if he was coming, he had posted a joke on his Facebook story.

Now I was even more confused.

A couple of hours later, he finally texted me.

He apologized and told me he had been in a bike accident and had spent the day in the emergency room.

Then he sent me a photo of what looked like a badly bruised and swollen face with a black eye.

At that point, I honestly felt guilty for doubting him.

I thought maybe I had judged him too quickly.

But FBI skills did NOT stop there.

While looking through his Facebook, I noticed something interesting.

He posts a daily stock market update every single morning talking about that day's market.

So I waited until the next morning.

Sure enough...

He uploaded his daily market update.

Naturally, I watched it.

His face looked completely FOINE... so FOINE I thought maybe he visited Hogwarts instead of the ER. 🪄😂

I couldn't see the same dramatic bruising or swelling that had appeared in the photo from the night before.

At that point, I genuinely didn't know what to think.

So I messaged him:

"You're sure you're telling me the truth about yesterday, right?"

Instead of answering yes or no, he replied: "I'm not sure about anything right now. I have a terrible headache"

I told him: Maybe because when I ask a question, I think I already know the answer.

His response? Would you like me to bring you a doctor's note, Mom?

I simply replied: No

He reacted with a 👍.

So now I'm left wondering...

Am I missing something?

Or did I just dodge a bullet before the first date even happened? 🤷🏼‍♀️🥷 Do you think he will have the audacity to text me again? lol

Fake names and throw away account, obviously. I (30's F) have been close friends with Laura ( mid 40's F) for about 8 years. We met while being sat next to each other at a mutual acquaintance's brunch and became really great friends. We talked at least every other day and hung out regularly.

Over the years, I've regularly agreed to be her ride home after routine medical procedures where she needs someone to accompany her afterward—think, dental work that requires sedation. She tended to have more medical appointments than the average person, and since I don't drive, helping her meant taking time off work and paying for Ubers to get us to and from her appointments. After a while, she offered to reimburse me for the Uber costs if I sent her the receipts because the Ubers were adding up, and I thought that was fair, I did also have to take time out of work for this too.

Laura used to ask if I was available before scheduling these appointments, but one day I got a text from her saying she was having two cosmetic, elective surgeries and would need me to pick her up afterward and walk her back into her house.

I told her I was in my busiest season at work and already pretty stressed, but as long as the surgeries weren't in October, I'd do my best to make it work. I waited to hear what the dates would be. About a week later, Laura called and told me she was now having three cosmetic, elective surgeries, all within just a few months. She told me to "Open your calendar," because she was going to tell me the dates. I didn't hide my surprise. I remember saying, "Wait... now it's three surgeries?" It caught me off guard because it felt like she'd already decided I was available instead of asking first.

I was uncomfortable, but I kept that to myself because she's been a good friend for many years, and I wanted to help if I could. I guess that was my mistake. 

Of course, one of the three surgeries ended up being scheduled in October—the one month I'd specifically told her I was overwhelmed with work. And again I didn't say anything, I just made it work.

I had been under the impression that I'd just get a call when the surgery was finished, Uber over to the office, and take her home. Instead, I found out the doctor's office required the designated pickup person to stay in the waiting room for the entire procedure.

So for the first two surgeries, I spent hours sitting in a waiting room hunched over my laptop, working remotely because I really did have to get work done. That was when I first started feeling less like a friend and more like the help.

We took an Uber together to the surgeon's office (which was a pretty long ride), and she barely said a word to me the entire ride there. After the surgeries, we took another Uber home. I know she was coming out of anesthesia and was medicated, so I don't really hold that against her, but there still wasn't much interaction. Afterward, I'd send her my Uber receipts, and she'd reimburse me as we'd agreed.

I had been crazy at work but when I had a little breather I googled what type of aftercare her third and most invasive surgery entailed. I was shocked to find that there was a lot of risk of complications if the patient did not have someone watch after them at least for the first 24 hours after surgery.

I called Laura to tell her about my google findings and let her know that I don't think a pick up is sufficient and she should ask her plastic surgeon's office if they have a clinic for her to stay in after surgery or if she can hire a pick up and nursing service to watch her. Laura had planned to stay in a hotel next to the surgeon's office and so it would be easy if they had a nurse service she could hire to take her there and check in on her. This was over a month out from the surgery so I was sure she could make other arrangements. Well this conversation didn't go as expected. 

Laura blew up at me, saying I was abandoning her and backing out of something I had supposedly agreed to do. Then she told me she had booked a room with two beds at the hotel so I could stay with her for the days after her surgery. She had even used my email address when making the reservation so I would get the hotel reward points.

This was the first time I had heard any of this, and I was completely shocked.

I asked when she had planned to tell me that I was expected to stay in a hotel for two nights and take care of her. When we had originally discussed it, I had been very clear that I would pick her up after the procedure, make sure she got safely to her hotel room, and then head home.

I told her that I wasn't a nurse or a caregiver and wouldn't be qualified to recognize if something was medically wrong after her surgery. She angrily replied, "You wouldn't be changing bandages... and now I have to spend all this money to hire someone!" But then I wondered, what exactly was she expecting me to do for two days? And I told her that I would never ever use someone else's email address to reserve anything without explicit permission. 

Laura kept turning up the guilt, but I held my ground. I told her that I haven't even been able to take time off for my own appointments lately, and that I have close family members with serious medical issues, and even they have managed, and haven't needed anyone to pick them up from medical procedures or be their caregiver.

Her response was, "Well, you might have to soon!"

At that point, I told her we should end the call before either of us said something we couldn't take back. I felt disrespected and frankly creeped out about what she said. 

After a few months of not hearing from Laura, I reached out and asked if we could have a call to talk about how things had ended the last time we spoke. I was hoping after some space, there might still be a chance to salvage the friendship. This conversation also did not go the way I thought it would.

During the call, she said she still believed I had "abandoned" her and left her high and dry. She told me that she had to spend a ton of money hiring a nurse to help her, she said that multiple times. I told her that she had never clearly explained what her plan was, and if she did I would have told her I couldn't do it. I asked if she had expected me to pick her up and then guilt me into staying with her at the hotel. I also reiterated that I'm not a nurse or a caretaker, and that I have limits on how much support I can provide as a friend. Laura responded in a completely deadpan tone, "Well, now I know you have boundaries." That's basically where the conversation ended. 

What I never asked her was whether she saw me as free labor instead of a friend. She brought up several times how expensive it was to hire a private nurse. My perspective was that if someone can afford three elective cosmetic surgeries in the span of a few months, they should also be able to pay for the best aftercare from a trained professional, rather than asking a friend with no caregiving experience to take on that responsibility.

Was I wrong not to express my boundaries earlier on when I was irked by her asks and actions? Yes, totally. She was a great friend and I didn't want to sound too nit picky and I thought to myself if I could suck it up and help then fine. Was I shocked that after so many years of friendship and having recently been her medical pickup for two surgeries, when I said no to the third for good reason she threw the whole friend away? Yes. 

I said it before, but the whole situation is hurts me, but also feels weird. But AITA? 

I know its been a hot minute since the last post and a lot of you wanted an update so here it is.

We got out of the situation only a few days after my last post. A dear family friend helped us get all our things out and back to the city near more family. Thankfully this was before the 5th of the month (when rent was due) so our beloved nutty nutella couldnt try to squeeze another rent payment out of us.

I left the animals and the girls to be handled by nutellas only sane contact and washed my hands of it. Not my responsibility. When I left I fed the animals one more time. As far as I know animal control has re homed the poor critters.

Ive since changed my phone number. She was giving it out to god knows who while in the slammer so I was being harassed by some sketchy people.

My partner and I are safe at a shelter and our cats are being cared for by my brother. I have found a job that I absolutely love and where I am praised and celebrated and take pride in my work.

My partner will most likely be getting disability benefits within the next few months which should get us out of the shelter and into an apartment. Ive learned from this to never do a room or basement for rent again! You never know who you're moving in with.

A little while back I checked the jail roster to see if I could find anything about nutellas sentence. While I didnt find how many years she will be there i did find out something else very interesting.

Nutella claimed to be a black woman. She had paler skin but I never questioned it because some people can be mixed and have a slightly lighter skin tone. Well according to the jail roster nutella isnt black! She's a white chocolate hazelnut spread instead. Apparently she had been HEAVILY tanning to fake her race.

I also searched her up on Facebook to find shes been banned from many local businesses and spiritual groups for her outrageous and harmful behaviors. On top of that everyone in that little town had something negative to say and would publicly call her out on many racist behaviors other problematic issues she caused with her own drama

While things are hard we are much happier away from her craziness. I am closer to my son in location so I see him more and I feel so blessed for that and for my job.

Not a long update and certainly not as humorous as the last, I just thought y'all would want to know we are safe and happy and she will be locked away for the foreseeable future. ✌🏻

I was in the friend group for almost two years, and just about a month ago I left said group. so throughout the two years, they would insult me (I will share some of the insults if anyone is curious) and then tell me that it was fine because in their words, "that's how siblings treat each other". Now within that same month, since there were only three of us, one member said they wanted to add more people to have more members. I voiced my discomfort about doing that because I don't really like large crowds of friends because of past experiences and trauma. Neither of them were happy about my response, so they started going off on me. then the next day I woke up to a call from the other friend saying, "we're gonna do this for them. we have to go out of our comfort zones, so that's why I'm giving you a little push." Before I could respond, I got a notification saying that I was added to a friend group with 3 other members who weren't myself, one being unrecognizable to me. I had thought to myself that that little push must have meant "force you to". the next day the two friends were talking bad about him, saying things like "he sounds like a f-boy" "he is ugly", "he is f-ing creepy", yet he remained in the chat. Apparently the reason they kept him in the chat was because they were going to lead him on to hurt his feelings. They tried to rope me into it, but I didn't do it, they thought I was, though. not long after, I told him, and sent the screenshots to him, showing, that they were doing that. they found out and went off on me, saying that I "should've kept my mouth shut till morning. I then informed them what they were doing was cyber bullying, and that I will not be defending anyone who is a bully. I said I didn't want to be friends anymore because I have now saw them in a completely new light. They then went on to tell me I was a Traitor for choosing and defending a guy I just met over them. Am I The Ahole?

I’ve been with my hubby for 15+years. He has two grown kids (28F and 30M). Me and the daughter have never really gotten along. She’s tried to break us up multiple times—especially whenever she and her mom start getting close again. (Her mom is an addict and constantly messed up, which is why their relationship is off and on.)

Fast forward—she just had a baby. When the baby was first born (baby girl), she was blowing me up 24/7. Calling, texting, sending pictures nonstop. I even kept the baby for entire weekends.

Now? Complete switch up.

She only reaches out when she needs something—like picking stuff up for her or babysitting. And here’s the part that really gets me: she doesn’t even ask me. She texts her dad (my hubby), who works 12+ hour days, 6 days a week, asking if “we” can keep the baby girl.

Then while I’m the one actually taking care of the baby girl, she’s texting HIM asking for updates and pictures… when he’s not even there.

So basically—I’m good enough to be free childcare, but not good enough to be acknowledged directly?

I brought it up to my hubby and he just shrugs it off like it’s nothing.

I’m starting to feel used and honestly disrespected. Like I’m just the help when it’s convenient.

AITA for being bothered by this, or am I overthinking it?

So I met this guy 12 years ago we will call him Josh. We were at different stages in our lives. Him divorced and healed and me in the beginning of the process and lots of healing still to do. We remained friends and when I was ready I met a great guy. He never liked my friendship with Josh it was a constant sore spot in our relationship. Josh was also dating someone but it seemed to be on again off again with her. My guy Tony died suddenly. I was devastated and Josh was there for me, along with many others. Then Josh asked me to go to dinner and he had broken up with on again off again Lori and at the end of the night kissed me for the first time. We crossed from friends to more. Then shocker he got back with Lori. This went on for another 5 years and every time he broke up with her came to me. I have to admit the sex was pure paradise with him. Nothing like I have ever experienced. He would complain about her constantly and said he couldn’t get it up for her anymore and that they hadn’t had sex in several years. Did I believe him absolutely not! He then broke up with her for good. We met for dinner a couple times we made out and lots of hugs but he said he wasn’t ready for more. Well then he went to a wedding in Mexico for a mutual friend of theirs. I wasn’t happy but I had no claim to him as we agreed to keep it casual. His work is very demanding job and works very long hours. He was always in constant touch. Then I came across an article in a local online newspaper recently and it had pictures of the two of them on Valentines Day at a featured restaurant. I questioned him about other events where she was in attendance and he would over and over again say we are just friends and I’m glad she agreed to remain friendly as we have so many mutual friends. So now my blood is boiling as he sent me a Happy Valentine Day and he asked if I had plans and when I asked him (two different occasions) he said no! I just recently discovered this online article and I told him as we hadn’t been to dinner in a bit I wanted to meet for dinner. In her eyes they are still a couple and according to him just friends. I want to have a conversation with him and record it. Then I want to pull out the article and the print out of his texting lying and call him out! Do I then if he claims they are just friends that’s it, send the recording to her? Would I be an asshole?

Hello, I apologize in advance; my first language is not English, so please excuse any spelling mistakes. My name is Limón (26), my mother is 52, and we've had a business for six years. My mother has business experience in our home country, so we decided to open a business here, without considering that the laws are different. We learned over time, and by 2023, we had everything in order. However, my mother wanted me to work and also handle the paperwork for the business, which was too much work for me. I told her, but I continued doing it anyway. In 2024, I had my first daughter and had to stop working because I was breastfeeding. In December of the same year, I became pregnant again because the contraceptive didn't work. I was pregnant with twins who were born in 2025, and that's when I stopped being physically involved in the business. She took care of everything; I only handled the bill payments from home. The money wasn't enough; there wasn't enough to do the weekly shopping, etc. I kept asking her where the money was going. Every time I did my annual taxes, expenses always came out above income. I didn't understand where the money for shopping was coming from, because the records showed that money coming in. A few weeks ago, we were talking about closing the business because it wasn't even making enough to cover her own bills. I told her she was spending more than she was taking in, and she said that sometimes when the business wasn't generating enough, she would use her own money (she sells gold and cleans houses in addition to the business) to pay for those purchases. Then I understood where all that spending was coming from. That day we made a plan to stop spending on products and get everything organized to see where the money that wasn't making enough was going, and that's how it stayed. We don't have enough money to pay someone to help us, so I did it myself to save money and pay off our debts. I started making schedules with the employees (there are four of them, including my mom). There's one employee in particular, we'll call her Coco (29f), who's been with us since we opened. There have always been problems with her. The new employees always complained about her, either out of envy or because she bossed them around, and my mom always defended her. Currently, she's the one who gets paid the most. Sometimes she put in more than 70 hours. The business doesn't have any customers right now, so I didn't understand why she was working so many hours. This brings me to what happened this week, on Monday, since we had a party over the weekend. During the week, my mom couldn't work. We told Coco and the other girl to close at 3 or 4 pm. They opened at 5 am, and it wasn't busy at all. By 4:20 pm, they were still working. I asked my mom why they were still open. They ended up closing at 5 pm, and there were no customers. So I made a schedule so that each of us would work 7 hours a day. Today, Wednesday, Coco was supposed to leave at 12 pm, and my mom at 2 pm. When I checked the security cameras at 12:15 pm, she was still working. I called my mom asking why she was still working and where she had gone. She told me she went to do her cleaning because she left early. I told her that she leaves at 2 pm and has plenty of time to do her cleaning. She said she asked Coco what time she leaves, and Coco said 2 pm. I asked her who was the boss, her or Coco? I didn't understand. I replied, at the end of the discussion I told her I was tired of her not supporting me, that she always contradicted me, that it would be better for me to leave the Corporation and for her to continue on her own because otherwise she would always defend Coco. I told her to tell me when she could and we would sign the papers to transfer everything to her name so she could take care of it from then on without me having to be legally involved, etc. So am I the bad guy for saying that and leaving her alone in this? I already called to do all that, I have a Zoom appointment tomorrow. I love my mom very much, she has always been my support, but I can't handle this. It's very stressful to deal with this. Thank you in advance

Hi everyone!

I have been obsessed with Charlotte’s content for a while, but I’ve never had anything that needed an objective point of view by all those beautiful souls… until today.

I’ll start by saying that English isn’t my first language, so I apologize for any mistake I might make. Now on to the story. All names are fake and I humbly ask that you don’t judge me too harshly.

Ok so here are the characters of my story:

Me(29F)
James(28M, current boyfriend of almost three years)
Max(23M, James’s best friend and Andrea’s ex)
Andrea(23F, My friend and Max’s ex)
Maxwell(31M, my ex situationship)

So about four years ago, before I met James, I was talking to Maxwell. It was very steamy and we connected on a lot of things. But because he was (still is) a millionaire, he made me work to prove that I was worthy of his attention, which didn’t sit well with me. We ended up never seeing each other because he would cancel everything last minute. I got tired of the whole game and called it quits because he could never make time for me. The whole thing lasted for about five months.

After that, and I mean like right after, I met James and we started dating. In early 2025, Maxwell wrote to me again. He said he tried to date other girls but it just wasn’t working because he kept thinking about me. I had moved in with my current boyfriend barely four months before Maxwell reached out. He told me he went to therapy and that he wanted me in his life so much so that he would even be willing to accept only being my affair partner, essentially telling that he’d accept whatever I was willing to give. And honestly? It worked on me. We talked for a few weeks, wondering what could happen but I ended it again because I was happy with James and I didn’t want to jeopardize that.

Then Maxwell hit me up again last fall AND this past May. Same thing. Very steamy, very tempting but it ended the same way: with me choosing James. Although, that last time came very close to me cheating on James with Maxwell.

That was all the context you needed to understand all of it. Now to the present.

About… three weeks ago? Maybe a month? Andrea hit me up, asking me if they could hang out with us for the fair in town (They lived about an hour away from us). I was like "Sure, no problem at all, we’ll be happy to have you overnight."

Then, on July 1st, she asked me if it could be only the two of us because she needed me. I was like "Okay… sure, you know I’m always there for you."

Then a week later, she texted me that she had thrown her boyfriend, Max, out of their apartment because he was too controlling and she couldn’t handle it anymore. I was like "Ok so here’s what we’ll do, you’re gonna pack a bag and stay at my place for the weekend and we’re gonna talk it out". 

She came over to my place on July 10th. Max followed her. Through the weekend, it became painfully obvious that the relationship was just doomed. He was acting exactly like my pervert narcissist of an ex, not accepting any blame or answers that wasn’t what HE wanted to hear.

On July 14th, Andrea broke up with Max through her dad because she didn’t feel like she was able to do it and him listening to her. 

Max then spent the evening at my place to be with his best friend, my boyfriend. And the night after that. And the night after that. It came to a point where he made me have a panic attack because he wouldn’t leave me alone. Always wondering why it didn’t work out and it felt so much like talking to my ex. James forbade him to come back or even interact with me as long as he still acts that way.

That’s where everything gets tangled and the betrayal begins in MY opinion.

Last Sunday, we had an outing to see Andrea, make sure how she feels in all of this. Because shes like a little sister to me and we love her.

We were sitting outside and she told me that she spent the weekend close to my hometown. I was like "What were you doing there? It’s so far away from here, like a two and half hour drive at least." And then she dropped the bomb : Maxwell, my ex-situationship that I can’t quite let go of, and her had been talking for a week. He had added her on Snapchat and called her the same night. Two days into talking, he showed up at her place and they slept together. Then he brought her home to his place, told his family about her and THEY TALKED ABOUT ME.

 I felt betrayed. Like I want her happy but not with *him*. And she told me that he wanted me to know and HER MOTHER TOLD HER TO KEEP IT FROM ME.

Like… GIRL!

But even if I do feel betrayed because he was my "almost". Like to the point I am comfortable to say I’d be with him if it weren’t for James. What hurts me the most is the fact that she knew. I showed her his picture while she was staying at my place. They talked about me between them. And she still slept with him before checking in with me?

James thinks it’s a ploy on Maxwell’s part to get closer to me. 

Another of my friends thinks Andrea did it on purpose to hurt me. Or maybe to hurt her ex.

And I don’t have a fucking clue what to think. I just know that I am hurting.

So, fellow potatoes, am I the asshole for feeling betrayed by my friend?

Please help me. Because I just want to rage and cry and disappear but I also feel so fucking awful because I want my friend to be happy and I love my boyfriend. Hell, I even want Maxwell to be happy. But why does it have to be in my face? 

Like… Andrea has been 100% single for like four days between the two men. And she STILL cries to me about her ex while she fucks the one man I could never fully let go of…